42 20 5655 https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/7fa8abfbc0dc7c5d3b822b4da83a5901.pdf d6e796251556fcf3a162048b0c836e4c PDF Text Text Conversations \Vith Ba:r:r Mandatory P.E. Now! THE STUDENT WEEKLY OF ST. The Outside Looks Kirstie Dodd' s Freshman Essay COLLEGE • ANNAPOLIS, \1ARYLAND • VOLUME XXXI, lSSUE SIX �T A L K THE GADFLY GO Cdlcge Avenue Annap1.'lis, Marvland 21401 United States of America .lm•im- &Htvr Ehzabetl1 Sµagnol~.ti Pe-sign Editor l Busin.:ss Manager Graphfr: Artist .Ad1J<.:-rti:iing f)ir<:i.1:or Cnntributon Keenan Trotter Marin SkQkandic Noah Litvin Conversations with Barr Phillip Army Jerome Dausman Elizabetl 1 Flotlning Chloe Ginsbll-rg Michadlacy Gabriel L~zier J.P. Snyder F ounded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly dioicributed to over 600 students, faculty. and staff of the Annapolis campus. Opinions expressed within are th<:> sole responsibility of the author(s). The Gadfly resen-es the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, informative. and thought-pro· Yoking newspaper which circum· stances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 w0rds or less haw a better chance of being published than those l0ng-er. Letters submit· kd will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. The Gadfly meets every Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the Barr-Buchanan Center. All articles are due at 11 :59 PM eYery Friday. Errors printed herein are, mostly. unintentional. Usually, typos, misspellings, and general falsehoods are rhe product of the human oversight, as opposed to malice. O ne of the riveting exposes of this Gadf1y volume was on the old SJC seal, adorned with seven books representing the seven liberal arts. I can't name them all, and much less could l give an account of why one sh~~ld study them. I won't be greedy with my newly acquired knowledge; the Medieval Scholastics, the most important product of rhe Carolinian Renaissance, split them into two groups. First, the Trivium: Grammar, Rhetoric, and Logic. Second, the Quadrivium: Arithmetic, Geometry, Astronomy, and Music. The Trivium was thought to be so much less difficult than the Quadrivium that it was called Trivial. Now these are the kinds of facts you'd expect to learn when studying about the liberal arts. But what is it to truly study the liberal arts? If St. John's is a liberal arts school, how is it that we don't know what the liberal arts are? Why are there seven books on the seal and not 3,269 (my estimate of how many books Mr. Sterling has read)? It seems there is a subtle statement being made that the program can be boiled down to these seven disciplines. "Well why the hell should I study these seven things?" I wondered, pacing my room, while my Eugene Lang application printed noisily in the background. So, I stopped by the library and asked Stringfellow Barr. The Gadfl:y, 10Years Ago In the October 5, 1999 edition of The Gadfly (Volume XX.I, Issue 6): A student group named People for the Ethical Treatment of Trees (PETT) recommended euthanizing the Liberty Tree. ("PULL THE PLUG PEOPLE!") Peter Hughes '02 warned, "Y2K is a big {ricking deal." Roberta Gable's byline appeared. Jonathan Lawless '00 presented an alternate proof explaining "why the image of the straight line in a Hjelmslev transformation is a straight line." With pictures. The newspaper's staff took a stab at covering world news. ("Giuliani Cuts Fund· ing to New York Art Museum; "How hot is the Earth's core?"; Doomsday Cult Promises to Tone Down"). Taylor Waters invited students to purchase tickets for a nearby production of King Lear. more on page 4 ~ He answered me from 1940 in the pages of The General Magazine and Historical Chronide. In response to my reproach of the St. John's method of education, he said: "First you must realize the purpose of liberal education is to free the human intellect, to render usable the intellectual powers which in varying degrees all men posses who are not idiots or cretins or asleep or too drunk to think." I granted him, "Yes, that might happen, but if I'm just getting better at what everyone can do, why don't I get better a.t something that's actually useful?" "TI1en," Barr snapped, his antiquated hickory smoked Chicago via Virginia accent, "you realize that these powers can perform certain operations, and the performance of these operations form intellectual habits. TI1e man who posses these habits has a more usable mind than other people." "Right," I said, recognizing the classic St. John's elitism. "\X!ell why don't more places teach the liberal arts so rigorously? You're obviously a. relic, though an interesting one. But times have changed, and no one wants people like this anymore. Scholasticism is dead, \X!inkie." Barr smiled and adjusted himself in his seat, realizing I wasn't a sucker after all. "Until recent decades, our Liberal Arts Colleges provided severe discipline so their students could acquire the fullest possible use of their intellect. We will say the result of such discipline is alumni with trained minds, the sort of trained minds businessmen long to get a hold of: active, alert, exploratory, ingenious, imaginative, rigorous, balanced." \Virh that, Barr had me pretty well convinced, and I probably would have left his company, drunk from Kool-Aid. But that teeming, probing mind of his pulled me a little further into the trouble of my education, and confused me once more. He continued, "But 'trained minds' sug- I THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 i �T A L K gest 'mental training'. At this point, my dear " as he is wont to call advocates of con- A Case Mandatory thought of that. which mv AP h~d detailC'd in a single paragraph, meant somethiiig about the impossibility of gaining knowl1 didn't understand it, knowing I never heart flared up against He was this perverse to nrnv mi-convince rn.e he was would rne4 Barr put his hand shoulder. "Instead of '"·'"""·a''"' with ,. he referring to about my "read v.,.'orks of son1e first#class men, who over centuries gave an a~count of hm"' the hu;nan be led to E. mv, as of you have at one time been freshmen had to sit through Mr. Pickens~s Athletes of the most of you are illiterate. hmv don't know this 11Uln' Fresh-- bers for intramurals the board. A recent son actually showed a more likely to read sports then participate. This means that you are off reading in your room with some trivial circulated gro\ving size of more of us will ucu·i.u;-,c you and now are trying to get that blazer before you graduate. It would give me more to \>:rite about. I am not advocating everyone participate in TI1at \Vould just cut into my time on the field. But everyone needs to be active in some 'Nay, \Vb.ether it be men Orientation heard it three times did it. room for phies? I Charles Lin1burg yoga. Except maybe sailing; I'm not convinced that counts. 111ere is an epi, demic of hining our nation and our carnpus, it won't be solved veganism or being forced to eat at the Dining Hall. Changing your diet isn't as necessarily drastic if you got up and sorn.ething. A mandatory program be difficult to and great habits you \Ve have all come here in a and to a kid. Then a f;w vears ago, I out he was ~ sex acldict with secret families around the world." Barr "On the is to follow the operations of other intellects. And to best ll1is means '''""'o--u"'"'·c from many centuries, books in many languages. Books are a1~1on.e the n1ost produ-~ts of the hun1an intellect." I sat back in my chair, Stringfellow Barr sat and seventy avvav from other, we con~idered what he said. in a seminar where everyone was \Vearing a St.John's Blazer? A mandatory athletics gram encourage interaction and make the commore of a I tried to stress this in n1y fi.rst article but "uua.H::u,,v are right. Exercise is becaus~ the soul is acof your requires strenuous activity to grmv, well, and be happy. Therefore, your soul is in need of exercise. THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 �c T Weird, Pretentious, Druggie, Racist L ast Joshua Cohen the nev> Democratic candidate for mayor of Annapolis. He replaced Zina Pierre, who was forced to drop out of the election due to concerns about her residential she otherwise. The hen Vlas ('kicked out Santa for not applying hirnself. later went on ro from the Univerl-1e is still considered an since he was enrolled for a le;1st one semester.) This comment set off a good deal of invective on The a chunk of it directed ar St. Here is a which may have been edited for grammar and clarity. J} who doesn't think St. is a Hard school should go seek out a Tudor and ask him or her for the "Great Books List." I was in the coffee located in McDowell Hall one day and to corne upor1 s01neone ' s copy and couldn't even read the tides. I can't imagine the books. For anyone who isn't familiar with this tains the student's year more, and explains the are to read for that year. -Steve Md. some it is a But there arc plenty of trust-fund hippies no matter how hard there, and it is it tries to convince itself others) otherwise. One of its monos is "we make men free means of books and a balance" but I guarantee you 90% of the school and tutors voted liberal and for Barack the of an 2009 Gadfl:y, 10 Years ".. .1 guarantee you 90% of the school and tutors "Tudors") voted liberal and for Barack sign of 1r1e D.J Clu.h requested $709.47 from the Delegate Council. (It was to be deliberated.) dis- Eddie's Bastard on \Xlest Poi~1_r could be son1e of the fvf.E.fvL Iv1a.guire 'Q2 pr.;tcst::.d a prior issue's photo of an orange, to ivhich t:he editor at the time, Robert Gambill, to n:Bd a beck or books so that you can in the discussions. It is far more dethan a typical universtudents are sity class. St. all above average in and rnust possess a keen interest in civih:ation. You do o± because each :mident must ac- A photo of novelist iVilliwn Kowalski '94 signing novel the quad. and a lot few that could be considered "an ideologically 'free' environrnent. " I would stFpcct tnos.t at lean a litde further left than most others. -Fred llnknotvn Location cussions, and if you are not pre.it is obvious to everyone at the table. That have knmvn many young \-vho have flunked out of their first semester or first year at and have come back home to finish up their degree and done fc~vorcibly. (Don't )Vid OCTOBEF'~ Md. did not respond I hear St is an easy school to ate from, not like MIT or Caltech a lot of THE CADFLY, "free" environrnent. yo<-.l have some Greek hmneivork to do?') Email addresses ·were different: o.t" the -:-irne. The Secretary of the Polity, A!Jike Goodrum '00, could he reached at m-,ooc>dn'.imcros;ica. eau. There appears w hmi'e been more t-utor-withstuden.t dancing going on in 1999. the layout ortist substituted a soccer ball for t:he 0" in SPORTSWIRE, v;,1hich was apparently a kind of athletics 11 column. Tt was Homecoming. Here's the consider themselves the rest of the liberal academies, because consider themselves SUPER-R.ATIONAL, and sneer at the lJS 'J'Je1vs & \v'o-rld and with many other signs indicate their contempt of other haw this Great Con'\'ersation that 2s on at in which all sorts of ~ 0""'""·n ideas are advanced and dialectical escruminata tested the tender foreheads of these young interlocutors! Haha'.! Bur it is all a deceptive ILLUSION a concept because at least as far as and social theory goes there really is Ha HA!! -Nei.U 1X!eircl, pretentious, racist, rapist, elitist. This is \ivhat I hear about this College~ I am glad lvir. Cohen has found something better to do. ft er that last comwnt, sent a nice letter to The for some muchneeded clarification: In response to an mticle about Joshua Cohen~s no1ninatiun an ancn)rrtous cornrn.ent.er on The 1 as preten· eiitist." I ivou:l.d like to add th..._rit iue ose also cannibals. Md. Keenan Trotter St. John~ s is a school and ycu have to be both bright Sr. John's �T H E M A l L Mistakes, Mistakes, and Other Colleges in an effort be Recently,worthy of thetotitle more "newspaper," The Gadfly has tried to incorporate pieces of "harder" journalism to add gravitas. Some of you may remember the piece "The Week in Review" in last week's Gadfly (Volume XXXI, Issue 5). This was an editorial-reporting hybrid about ironic happenings on and around tl1e Annapolis campus in the style of the "Findings" of Harper's Magazine. Though the tone of the piece was meant to be humorous, the article made a serious insinuation that Warren Spector '81, a supporter of the college and member of the Board of Visitors and Governors, was not fit to help the St. John's with financial decisions. The piece took select clippings from New York Magazine and let tl1e reader draw conclusions about Mr. Spector' s abilities. The article was not approved by College officials. The Gadfly is our eponymous mission statement; we, like Socrates, firmly believe in the thought-provoking nan.ire of controversy and the necessity of Truth. But this is insofar as it provokes thought, and it does so in a fair, open-minded, and appropriate manner. The information about Mr. Spector did not consider the whole of the situation and painted him in a grisly light. We apologize for this. We at The Gadfly are committed to good journalistic practices, and in the future we promise to bring you, the reader, the full perspective on an issue. -KIRSTIE Dooo, FOR THE GADFLY STAFF O ne thing I regret about the current St. John's way of life is that there is rarely anything ever just "going on" here on campus on the weekends. I never knew it could be different until one weekend I traveled to another college. I visited my girlfriend at Goucher College in Baltimore. \X!hile there, we were infonned on Saturday that there would be a student funk band hired by the school playing in the residential quad that night. So around 8:00, we found our way over to the open grass where many students were gatl1ering to sit, talk, laugh, but centrally, to listen to the upbeat but distant, relaxing funk music. People came and went; some got up and danced, some played with the hula hoops and bubbles set out for public play, some merely sat listening. The atmosphere was light-hearted, and everyone seemed to have shed many of their social inhibitions. As a guest in that student community, I enjoyed just watching the stars come up while unwinding and talking with friends. Overall, it was enlightening. TI1ere had been excitement for the event all day. When it happened, the people were out together as a community and not cooped up in their dorm rooms. There was little drinking, yet free-spirited laughter and joviality still abounded. It was a satisfying, fun evening. \X'hy can't St. John's have more planned, communal events like this? -ANDREW MIZE THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 �F E A T U R E S {DODD Wind~Eggs A revisitation of my essay KIRSTIE DODD sa1 on Criticisrn. Its with a linge~ing battle with an uncomfortably iong fashion \vith overalls, marked my life. I remember reading famous line, "True ease in writing comes from art. not chance/ As those moved easiest who learn\1 to (362-362). At the tried to forget the words; I was more concerned witl; the fact that the bass drummer from my marching band sponding to my feminine your bass drum is math you isked the ones most test...") than Pope's 'ner01c . teen, I became a freshman at a called St. College. About arv. I was informed that I had to write an A1~~rnal Essay on anything I wanted from the freshman year curriculum as long as it fulfilled the nebulous criterion of "interesting. Somehow everyone about this except for me. about it," tipperclassmen told me, even matters." Freshman Essay right. By the time I started, it seemed like every freshman was his/h.er ei,ghth tome on sorne non-Progr;m l sat dovm without any preparation in goggling at the bar at the top of a blank rnent. Once f it took five days to hammer the whole thing out, from first draft to final to scavenge for or when my roommate was trysting with her In retrospect, there were two problems my Freshnian Essay: and my matter. I \Vas a problem I used to think I was a very clever ·writer. I using the "soporific" correctly in a sentence=desk job at The Neu; York Times and Pulitzer prizes out the wazoo. 1 \Vould cast out that little gem in any school THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2co9 essay, and my teachers would swoon like St. TI1eresa. I or art that of, my firm 1 was the greatest v.Titer in the world a deft pen or the dick of a on a I easy-peasy little St. my paper with puns and (the exclamation was degree), 100 mile as a chain-smoker. I reread the last summer and I, a "seasoned" rising junior Johnnie, had no idea 1vhat 1,vas going on. TI1e >vax and the bird and the \Vind-eggs and all that junk confused me so much I sDent a ~elf i.n a closet witl{ and ten issues of Veronica. The title of the essay, was "Wind-Eggs, and Intellectual {MY FROSH ESSAY: \VO.Rl..D EXCLlJSJVE} I decided to be and I \vrote a first sentence that makes me "Midwife of wind-eggs: Socrates this to his resum<': TheaeteI thought a \Vas, I shall never the word "tapestry" three times alone in the first paragraph in an extended metaphor about weaving and followed this up with the paragraph composed questions to demonstrate mv abilities of cognition and serious inql;iry. In an effo;t to be matchey-matchey with all of the wind- fonts and italics other Word would do the trick. In I tried to 1Nrite my freshm.an essay like a article. As if that were bad one of the most for the topic. I n thought of writing a ten to fifteen page essay on Theaet-:tus seems like an of exclamation points used essay. Clearly I was excited In this paragraph, I compare in a telescoping "111eta" discussion about to TI1eaetetus-as if I were writing the essay. I ever trip into full, the �A R T S {POEM} {POEM} Strangers Love from Three Different Anglers Once a forlorn Plebe had wandered north of College Avenue. "\XThat is this?" the lone Plebe pondered, "College halls come into view!" He not knowing of the College or it's ancient history, passing Johnnie he acknowledged: "Will you please enlighten me?" "How come you don't wear uniforms? \Xlhere is your martial spirit? Why do you have more than one dorm? Please answer, and declare it!" "Our unifonns are T-shirts here and ratty dungarees old; For students are much freer here ... or so at least we've been told!" "We fear our martial spirit lives too strong in Spartan Mad Ball. But we enjoy the thrills it gives engaging in that mad brawl." ''.fmd we allow the students here to lodge in dorms quite varied. Or live off campus far or near if traveling' s not harried." "But \ve've mucl1 more than you have viewed. I'll show you to the Chasement." And Johnnie gave him beer fresh brewed, which led to his debasement. So Plebe's beware of St. John's fare, its siren songs are tempting. And pleasures there beyond compare will Bancroft Hall be emptying. -Jerome Dausman {TRANSLATJON PRACTICE} Agamemmnon's Reproach Excerpt from (ll. I 177-8) P-zEho-ro; OE µof f:om 6LOTQEcp€wv Ba.mlc~rov· a.tzt yaQ -rm EQt£ -rz cp0,11 n6/,zµo( tE µaxm tf· d µ6./,a XUQ'tEQO£ EOOl, 8z6; n:ou OOl t6 y' EOOJXEV -a. £x8Q6;, -6v hated: -LOTO£ superlative (i.e. most hated); µo( dat. pronoun (£yw) lime; OLOtQccpfi;. -€£ Zeus-nurtured; Ba.mt.EU£, oking; alct=ad EQL£, ~strife; µ6.xri, ~fight; XUQtEQO£, -a, -6v (very) strong; oo( dat. pronoun (ou) you; t6 here "it" i.e. Achilles' strength; f-&wxi::v aor.3 .sg. (ofowµt) give The first person to emaiL the author with the corrc:ct ansq,ver wil! hatie his/her name published in the next issue. -Bmd!ey Van Uden {PUZZLE} Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooh'. 11-iere are plenty of fish in the sea, But that phrase doesn't sit right with me! For if mates can be exchanged, Then love looks very strangeLike eyesight that blends all it sees! Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooh! There are plenty of fish in the sea, Yet perhaps none of them are for me! For if they're all the same, And just called different names, Then I'd rather stay solitary'. Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooh! l11ere are plenty of fish in the sea, Which should make things easier for me! For if love can be caught, Then love can be bought From those folks who do catching for fees'. ~ -Gabrid Luzier D.C. Minutes Meeting calkd to order at 11 :55 am Dis~.~ission of DC Theater Club charter request at l 1:57, archon present Discussion oi Meat Club charter request at 12:05, archons present Discussion of Gen11an Lon2$word charter request at 12:06, archon prese1~r Archons dismissed for vote at 12: 14 Motion to charter DC Theater Club by Ms. VanHoose; Seconded by Mr. Osborne; Motion passes at l11e hours rolled on, the gates were shut, the Plebe had passed out drinking. There was a rumbling in his gut. He threw up without thinking. When he awoke it was quite late: next day was nearly half-gone. And panic filled his short-cropped pate: he'd hoped to sneak back 'fore dawn. "Don't worry son, your life's not o'er. We'll sign you up for hist'ry, some ethics, science, and lots more: Greek grammar with its myst'ry." And now that Plebe a Johnnie is. He sings in Freshman Chorus, and whistles while about his biz: there's a fine moral for us. Three Johnnies Three Johnnies are having a conversa:tion. A senior always tells the truth, a junior always lies, and nobody knows what a sophomore will say. Person One says: "Person three always lies." Person Two says: "Person one always tells the truth." Person Tiuee says: "I can lie or tell the truth." \Xlho is who? The answer to last week's puzzle is that the man in front was wearing a black hat. The first person to email the author with the correct answer will have his/her name published in the next issue. -Elizabeth Fleming 12:21. 11vtion to charter German Long.::i·word bv Mr. Kunkle; Seconded; Motion passes at 12:23. Motion w charter Mtat Club by Mr. Kunkle: Seconded by Mr. Maher; Motion passes at 12:25. Diswssion c>f Orthodox Christian Fellowship budget at 12:25, archon present; Motion to enter S700.00 into preliminary budgeting by Mr. Maher; Seconded by Mr. Kunkle: Motion passes at 12:27. DL<:;cussion of Fencing budget ar 12:27, archon present; Motion to enter $1487.05 into preliminary budgeting bv Mr. Maher; Seconded bv Ms. Teclem· aria1;1; M:~ti~n passes at 12:31. ' . Discussion of Gaming Club budget at 12:32, archon present; }v1otion to enter $40.00 into preliminary budgeting by Mr. Maher; Seconded by Mr. Harrington; Motion passes at 12:34. Discussion of Aikedo Club budget at 12:35, archon present; Motion to table budget.upon further review by !vts. VanHoose; Stconded; Motion passes at 12:36. Discussion of Crossfit budget at 12:36; Motion to enter $400.00 into preliminary budgeting by Mr. Maher; Seconded by Mr. Osborne; Mc1tion passes at 12:40. Meeting adjourned at 12:40 pm. THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 �Cohen '94 entered A few ln Frisbee-~Fris·· bee~-~-The nal after poor finances records may have incli· . . , 1n eitt1er. Had she been elected, Pierre vrnuld have been the first African-American mayor of suggested Cohen \vas asked or expelled from, St. "It is correct that I was 'kicked out' for not applying " Cohen The printed that is that fact to them. I took in Santa Fe for semesters but my focus was not on the academics. During my don rag after the first se1r1ester ot year, and I agreed that I needed to time oft." So no blood after 4) in a profile about his 'J'·"H''"~· uesdav is noYv Gadfly comes out. at .:">UI sixth issue, \Vh.ich is six inore issues than The Epoch has blessed the Polity with this The Gadfly will be taking a break for weekend due to distracting sexual tension benveen all rnembers~ \YJe \\Tote in our last issue that \Varren Spector, as of publication, had not tried to us back. This is some·xhat true. On Tuesday, his emailed The T THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 Druids visited the exotic land ofT.11e Hustlers, determined the marketability of peat, and eA-ported it, 15-1.3. In Reason Ball, The Guardians. finally pulling out that bildungsrmnan they had been writing off and on since they v..rere fourteen, realized. the opportunity in scandalizing the Spartans. 1914. In Soccer, The Hustlers becarne the fifth BRIC economy (thus: BRICE) and drained L.~e Spartans of their market potential, whatever that may mean, 3-1. The Guardians waged a potentially dan1aglng civil war on the Spartans, 4-1. ln solidarity, the Druids prepared, baked, frosted. and ate 'I11e Guardians, 51. about the author of the article. \Ve emailed her back with the full contents of the O discuss the about n dog in a music unnamed tutor tore off a long strip from an issue of The GaJ: you so S~~~~~~~~ ~;~s 8:02 pm Mssrs Harrell and Yee' s senior seminar. The students of tb.eir exuberance a rendition of nale" on the the Great Hall. riday '''as a momentous event in the of The: The staff sat down with Ms. \Vaters, Ms. Paalman, Ms. Dem.psey, and Ms. Harty to after it was so nicely laid out'." a student exclaimed. The tutor smiled, laughed. "Really?" a student offered. Shammai, the dub on campuoc, bat dinner. F archon. Upon a bottle of wine, she clarified, "It's non-alcoholic." {ADVERTlSElviENT} � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 6 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-10 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 6 of The Gadfly. Published October 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.6 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/0fcb6c560fc5f6c6dd7828ce41de5dea.pdf b9a641fa0a404e4e13f439e74117c59d PDF Text Text �T A L K THE GADFLY ;.,_-:::dlc:g:::A;,·,;:--,-tu,· An ,a1x1li~:, 214C'll t lnitcd St:Yl\::• Ar.,<:'Tica On History and The Program- Playful Words and Serious Glances (Part I of IV) f'.::~--=1· ,"~~-:J with each step we take, and a way of life. We and bodies Blcd·il Jc;L_r-;_ i\llll Mc;-.rril' Lc,ui.~ Pish3. ?rno ,i,-,~:K• in all seriousnt~ss; for as Plato phrasing like all senous n1en never F ounded in 1980, 11-1e CJadflv i;; the student weekly distributed to on~r 600 students, faculty, and staff of the 1\. nnapolis can1pus. Opinions expressed '":ithin are the solt responsibility of the author(~). Thi:' Gadfly rt."er,:es the right tc accept, reject., and edit ~ubrn.i::sions in any \Yay nece.ss::i.ry to publish the n1ost prcfrssional. inforrnative, and thought-pro\\Jking n~wspaper which circurnstance~ at St. john's pennit. Letters of 200 '.vord:: or less ha\'t' a better chance of being publisht>d than those longer. Letters subrnitted \vill be edited for ~ra1nn1aL punctuation, and spelling i11 n1{JSt cases. The Gadflv is not obligated t1) publish all subrnissions ex.. -:cpt under special cirnt1nstances. The Gadfly n1etts every I_:;riday at 7 Pfv1 in the lov,·er leYel of the Barr-Buchana11 Center. All articles arc due at 11:59 PM every Fridav. Errors printed herein art, n1ustly~ unintentional. 1-.Jsually: typos~ inisspdlings, and ~cueral fahehoocis art: the product of the hu1nan over::;ight . as opposed to lnalk:e, Ajax. Instead I see that the ''''-'"'c>:c, its is like the Socrates before him, dwelled. even dare to say that Aristotle agree with me bv his own definition - as the markings look rnuch the ·we are to him. Great \Ale h.ave our O\Vn resembles rhe famous after a supports. \Xie seldom remembering the are constantly looking into the essence of things, balancing the tvm general mean, THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 who chose to live us. group ourselves in smaller units but still come cvhen the occasion demands. \Ve have our mvn version of a V/e n1ake great efforts to pt:er 1nt0 rl1e \Vorld us, or at least tl1e one to us) and ask the san1e basic th.at all the great rnen before us. have True, \Vt sometimes sight of certain like to remind him his and who (Stoicism.) and Gardenand t1-1ese n1oral--ridden men, who feh they \Vere far too important than to concern them.selves reigned happily for half a millennium in their sensationalism and reclusive natures and are still like cockroaches. Some even make appearances in om blessed though thev are thrown at us without explanation and as to their scheme of the Plaof the Program. But and call us citizens of guided take up magnificent from ignorance in our mvn rights. And \Ve succeed, more or 111 our our own progression in education the identification fTon1 others) barbarian or "~ �CULTURE The Art of Boastful Rapping M y friend, Stephen Widlak, once said to me that a lot of rap music is the art of boasting. In that assertion, "art" is equal in value to "boasting." Tims, if the execution is artful, one can boast and be clever, witty, and even insightful. Does this mean that rap fans of all ages and dispositions enjoy listening to people boast, even when those people ain't sayin' nothin' profound? Kind of; it depends on the use of the term "profound." If used as slang, it refers to how powerful and artful a song is. And you better believe that by this usage, Run DMC's "Sucka MCs" is profound as hell. Hip Hop is a lot of things, and many of us also enjoy it when a rapper drops knowledge: he says something that educates and uplifts us. But right now, I'm talking about boasting. When a rapper spits an amazing verse, we hip-hop-heads often feel-really feel-that he "killed" or "murdered" the track. This means the rap on the track was a glorious massacre-like Achilles' breathtaking rampage through the Trojan armv. "\'(,'hen we say a rapper "murdered" a tr~ck, we mean that he or she laced the ''illest" rhymes with the "dopest" rhythm for the music. \Y/e use violent imagery to describe this because every track is a musical stage for a rapper to prove his superiority in his craft. Appropriately, an urban and spirited listener expresses his appreciation by saying that the rhymesmith destroyed something through potency of spirit, by mastery of craft. But we aren't implying the rapper committed an immoral or amoral act. Some rap does concern the un-virtuous. However, themes of unethical behavior aren't the roots of the music. To assume such is not an astute observation about the best of rap-even gangster rap. The rapper's flow does not mutilate the music. 'X·'hile we say that rappers "kill" tracks, they don't actually destTOy the track. We mean that their rapping complemented the music in a unique and rhythmically and musically fitting way. What they really destroy is the possibility of being mediocre, cliche, or inconspicuous. For real rappers true to the art form, music is not simply a stage for self. assertion, or even a background for their rhymes. For real MCs, the music is the wedded wife of their rapping, its partner and muse. To make this very clear, in the early days of hip-hop, from the mid-7Os to the earlv 80s, the Dl was the most important a1~d respected. figure in the music. The DJ came before the rappers even appeared on the stage, and when MCs started rapping, they did it primarily to bring their DJ's skills to attention. Many rappers won't write a rap for a song until thev hear the music thev'll be rapping to. 111~ music moves them .to rap something particular to complement it. I leave vou with an example of artful boasting, Just to give you a taste. Here are some dope lines from Rakim's "Microphone Fiend": "... Unawareness / Beware / It's the/ Re-animator/ A menace to a microphone /A lethal 'Weapon/ A assassinator /If the people ain't steppin' /See a part of me that 'IOU never seen/ \Then I'm fiendin' fora-microphone/ I'm the Microphone Fiend.,.". Earlier in the track, Rakim compares his addiction to music and rapping to a heroin addiction, emphasizing the severitv of his "habit." Then, above, he wan1s tl~ose unaware of his prowess on the mic that he V.7ill invigorate the ignorant by his ~ skill. He uses violent images in a stylish : way, calling himself a "menace to a micro- ~ phone" and a "lethal weapon." He does ~ this to exemplify his cleverness and the ~ seriousness of his role as a crowd-mover, ~ or MC. Calling himself an "assassinator" ;:: comes right after he savs he's the "rei animato;," but there's ~o contradiction ~ here. TI1e violent self-evaluations are so · powerful that, as poetic metaphors, they "' ~ animate the listener, exciting and im~ pressing him and moving him to "step" ; (i.e. ornove and dance). See \vhat I mean? '" 'J!l."" e THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 200 �MEMOIR J erry Januszewski Cheese & Power I is to feel inferior," and, "People want to was in a city in Southern lndia believe they deserve their good fortune . with nvo hours to kill before The receipt of a favor can become oppresmeeting up with some friends for sive." All this is based on the premise a concert. l wanted to sit in a coffee that the desire for power, not love or shop and read, but I'd forgotten to fairness, drives human interactions. He bring a book. I' cl already read the writes, "The feeling of having no power English language newspaper, so I over people and events is generally unturned to one of the street vendors bearable to us- when we feel helpless we sitting behind a book table . feel miserable." Hard to argue with that. He had the usual load: re-heated Since power relationships aim at creat~ self-help books, thirty-year-old business school texts, creepy yoga manuing desirable changes for ourselves, the als, and Hindi comic books. There author zeros in on a common flaw in was a pulpy Love Story by Erich Segal our beliefs about change: "The Reality: Change is slow and gradual. It requires (very popular in India). I settled for hard work, a bit of luck, a fair amount of The 48 Laws of Pmver by Robert Greene- an Indian edition of a US self-sacrifice, and a lot of patience. The best seller, touted on the back cover Fantasy: A sudden transformation \Vill as "a master class for Machiavelli." bring a total change in one's fortunes, bypassing work, luck, self-sacrifice, and Not my usual fare, but for 125 rupee time in one fantastic stroke." ($3.00), I figured I couldn't go too Indulging in this fantasy version of wrong. In fact, I was hoping for the experience I'd had many times how our lives improve makes us weak already in India: finding US enterand easier to exploit, he says, vulnerable to the pressures and manipulations, tainment imports that were so bad however unconsciously employed, of they were good. I enjoyed the weird incongruity of sampling India's taste those around us. It's easv to see this in for lowbrow American diversions people's drinking behavi~r, particularly while I was in a setting so unlike those using alcohol to feel more at ease America. I was growing accustomed in social situations. to feeling jarred in an amusing way, Becoming comfortable with our emosort of like watching a performance tions involves slow and gradual personal of Hamlet starring Pee Wee Herman. growth. This requires hard work and But with The 48 Laws of Power, patience as we learn to accept ourselves my need for cheese was denied in the present. Many can't stomach the task. A few drinks may accomplish this and gladly so. As advertised, it is artificially, but, according to the ideas of an amoral analysis of the nature of power and manipulation. It is also Robert Greene, that puts the person in a a serious, lucid, and unsentimental position of weakness, making them more exposition on human nature, full of of a puppet than a player, more subject to external forces . Machiavelli calls it forirony and fascinating insight. Not unlike, dare I say it, Machiavelli's The tune, an inferior position of reliance on Prince . external forces; "a prince wins ... either by The author Robert G reene unapol- fortune or by prO\vess [virtu, ].... the less a man has relied on fortune the stronger ogetically advocates subterfuge and he has made his position." It's worth~ seduction to acquire and maintain power in relationships (tactics used, considering that conducting your social he says, by many claiming to abhor life free of the fantastical prop of alcothem). His analysis is full of attenhol is virm ·, an expression of personal tion-grabbing gems about relationpower.~ ships such as, "To experience en\y THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 Pinkney Hall, as photographed in 1950. THE IVY LEAGUE - �T H E The following letter was submitted to The Gadfly after Mr. Merkel was asked to mubmit his piece, lost in mai!host, with the caveat that the publication could not ensure that his submission would be printed. O h, I completely understand; nor would I at all want to displace the contribution of any current student from the pages of this noted periodical. My only thought this whole along has been, "It may, conceivably, be something they would be interested in filling up a column or two of space with, perhaps, after all the regular contributors have succumbed to influenza, and the venerable Dausman's muse dries up; perhaps, then, in the depths of the Octobrous regions of the calendar, I at least, immune to ennui and essay assignments, might have a chance to interject my humble scribblings, and heroically to save The Gadfly from the unfortunate oblivion Lack Of Material; for this (I am sure none will contradict), would, manifestly, be a Thing Worth Doing." In fact, I can probably do that for you as often as you like, but I thought this would be a good start. Here is the essay again. If you do not like it, I can alter every other word (in alphabetical order) and present you with an amusing anecdote about French kittens. If your journalistic appetite is not whetted by French kittens, I might be compelled to ruminate about such earthlv matters as bookstores and bus- sched~les. Or it may be that your devoted and brilliant authors swallowed more than the usual half-tablespoonful of Vim over the summer, and are creating for you such largesse of literary victuals for the general delight of the reading classes at our esteemed College, that because of this you would (wit!~out any personal M A I L feelings, to be sure) have simply no need for anything I \Hite, no, not even were I to sail to the other side of the wine-dark sea, and write you coded reports special on t!1e back of a postage-stamp. To this I would be supremely and calmly resigned; it would affect me no more than would a game of backgammon. ''Timothy,'' I would say (for I address myself by my first name), "Timothy, The Gadfly has no need for you, but this is not a slight on you, nor is it a slighr on them; no, no, my friend, though you are the best of friends (and I speak, you understand, in all sincerity), you provide a modest inconvenience to their requisite load of eight pages every week. Your words would o'erburden them and and cause, no doubt, some great calam:ity resulting in the deaths of countless axolotls by an enraged editorial staff, a thing (manifestly) Not To Be Desired. Friends, most certainly, should not become an inconvenience to their friends, and thus, Timothy, the rejection of your articles you must brush off lightly, like you would a phantasmagorical elephant were he, in your dreams, to be launched from a volcano and traverse the inner leg of a gentle hyperbola and land upon your bosom and cast you into the depths of the ·wine-dark sea." That [... ] is my state of mind; it is difficult to conceive of a being more imperturbable and unflappable than I, although Anselm would assert that it can be done. All I ask (and I am conscious that your time is very valuable, and I only ask you to spare it when you can) is to let me know, when you can, within reason, what's up. Ever yours, -TlMOTHY MERKEL On 11mrsdav, the Don Rag schedule was posted in the coffee shop to the delight of some and the anxiety of others. 1l1e reason? Not so much about scheduling conflicts (seeing your time as Saturday, 9:30 am, the day after you turn twenty-one could produce some consternation) but about the revalation of middle names. 111e Rumplestiltskins of camus were groaning; the jig was up. but notwithstanding the strange and somewhat embarrassing names, a few surfaced to be worthy of the word "sweet." \Ve at The Gadfly salute youKING VAN BIBBER CRAWFORD & WILLIAM CORBELL COTTEN-POTTER -for having the sweetest names on campus. Use them wisely. -THE GADFLY STAFF 56 Maryland Avenue Annapolis, Maryland 21401 shop@smokeshopusaltd.com www.smokeshopusaltd.com '--~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~---' THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 ~ "' "' ~ '" :: ~ ~ ~ �FEATURES nof"TI are differe om ist are one common element: they by . ussians. Tolstoy, Dostoyevsky, Turgen Nabokov... they all appear at least once. Le , Fyodor-what I like to call the "heavy-hitted two, even three times on some lists. "But Kikita," you might ask, "'X'hy are there so many great Russian novelists?" TI1at' s easy. Because of Russia. Covering more than an eighth of the world's land area, bloated with the world's greatest supply of mineral and energy resources, and the socialistic terror of the late 20th century American consciousness, Russia itself is enough of a reason to produce great novelists. As a people, they excel in excellence. Russia cleans up at the winter Olympics, churns out composers and ballerinas, and sends 4,000 to 6,000 smoking hot mail order brides over the pond to wed American business men every year. Below I list the top si.x reasons why Russia has been able to shoot Chekhov and others, like Soviet cosmonauts, into greatness among the literary stars. The Cold: Knmvn for beating more than one power-.tripping general back into Europe, the cold tundra and subzero winter clime of Russia has conquered the best and worst of men alike. It not only keeps the fur trade alive, but it also keeps people indoors. TI1ese countless hours spent cooped up around a samovar with nothing but murderous thoughts and a pen inspired ;,vriters such as Dostoyevsky to create egotistical, seedy, brooding protagonists. Vast Expanse: Russia is one of the most diverse countries on the planet because of its immense size. It spans eleven time zones and borders almost twice as many countries. It might even be silly for me to talk about a "Russian novel" because the differences between one town and the next are far bevond the differences between Indianapolis and An~apolis, and the only thing holding the category together is geographical proximity. 'X'hatever the case, tl1e sheer size and magnificence of the Russian land has imbued the language and writing with a wide-lens scope. If the novel has less than twenty main characters and 700 pages, forget it. THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 pages commenting on it. 1; Patronymics: Ever had trouble remembering tl1e fifteen names that go \vith one character in a Russian novel? Russian people don't. The name system in Russia has increased the populations' memory beyond that of any American's, and it has boosted the Russian v.niter's ability to recall facts on command. TI1e patronymics in Russian novels were put there intentionally to confuse and irritate non.Russian readers. For example, you might be okay with remembering Nikolai=Nikoloushka, but then tl1e v.'Iiter throws you the "Coco" curveball and you want to tl1row the book across the room. Russian Food: Not many of us sit around at 5:30 pm craving Russian food. Due to the Cold War, McCarthyism and the rise of pizza and lo-mein, Russian food has been pushed out of the American pantheon of preferred "ethnic" cuisine. It's a shame, really. Russian food fills you up like crazy. Eating potatoes, borsch, cabbage, and beef every day, we'd spend a lot less time eating and thinking about eating and a lot more time thinking about our futures as literary giants. Vodka: And I'm not talking about the kinds that you might have experienced witl1 a Brita filter and cheap cranberry juice, either. I'm talking about tl1e real stuff that provided Gogol with enough fire-belly and crazy visions to finish his manuscripts. It's no coincidence that the Russian words for "vodka" and "water" are only one letter off. From my estimation, Fathers and Sons was written with one shot per page, perhaps two on the more lyrical passages. Of course, there are plenty of other v..Titers in America and elsewhere that did not have these Russian things and still made it in the literary world. All I'm saying is, with the threat of Siberia to rhe north and the grim prospect of boiled beets every day, the Russians sure know how to get the vvTiting thing done . ...- �{POEM} Truth be Told ... Truth came to me one evening, standing rhere Amidst the 1Arreckage of a troubled soul And asked me if, per chance, I would forebear ... From seeking Death who holds the seventh bowl? From telling lies that lie there black as coal? -· From trying oh-so hard to gain control? From making fun of those that claim the dole? From pointing out false virtues to extol? From giving up complete my lifelong goal? From telling lies on lies, an endless hole? From shooting in my lawn to kill a mole? From messing up my chances of parole? From enlisting in the fatal Dawn Patrol? From painting black the local barber's pole? From boosting volume on the rock-androll? From leading to the hay a girl to roll? From opening the last forbidden scroll? From sharing not one pence of what I stole? From shirking work to take a lengthv ~ , stroll? From jumping gates so I avoid the toll? From telling partial truth, but not the whole? No'. From poetry that's lost its self-control. -lemme Dausman {TRANSLATION} Sappho Fragment, 31 <f>alvi:tal. µm x11vo; roo; Mmmv £µµzv' WVYJQ. otw:; EVCTVtt6; tOl iooavi:t xal. Jtl.am:ov &ou cpwvi:Loa; u:rc:aXOUEL xat yi:A.a(oa; tµEgoc:;, TO µ' ~ µ<Xv xaQo(av £v oTfj8c:m; £m6moc:v· co; yO.Q £; o' row ~QOXE w; µz cpwvri-o' ouo£v ET' ctxc:t. a):Aa xaµ µEv YACOOOCJ. foyc, f-.f:rc:TOV 8' aunxa XQWL JciJQ u:n:abt:CQ6µaxi:v, 6:rc:m:hwm o' OUOEV om1µµ'' i::rc:tPo6 µEl<Jl o' axoum ' 8xabc: µ' LOQrn; xaxxecTm, TQ6p.o; b£ :rc:aioav UYQEL. xl-.WQOTBQCJ. bf :rc:o(a; £µ~tl, TE8vfoo1v b' 61..,lyw 'mocin1c cpa(voµ' £µ' afrcm. - • He seems to me to be like the gods that man who opposite you sit~ ' and close to vour sweet speakinO' , "' listens intently and your lovely laughing! How it the heard in me excites'. How when I look at you, but for a moment, not even speaking remains and my tongue quits me and thin fire races under mv skin and my eyes have i~o sight and a roar fills my ears and sweat pours dmvn me and a trembling seizes all of me and greener d1an grass I am, and close to death I feel... But being poor, all must be endured. -Josh Primiano {BLOWING UP DOGS} -Patti Morriti THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 200 �{BREAKING} Plateless Dining? The debate continues .. _ LOFIS PISHA been the nutrition of the food we are to the students here, as ·well as the convenience of the Parkhurst JVU"'-~·''.,''"" "After "''a"n·""' \vhatever we St. is in nation." Ms. Stewart described the ,. ...- .. ,.,._,,, transition to Platdess a hitch." She said that would be available but we ask you not to use them it is necessary. Student'"''""'"'"' has been sharply divided on issue, into the self- TI1e Conservatives 'Nish to traditional of has been in the fact that around the to hold food. In contrast, the Ancients base their in The Iliad the best way to this is to eat 'Nith their hands. There been one report of violence during the Ancients ou.k,,oilcu decorative THE GADl~LY, OCTOBER 2009 � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 7 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-10 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 7 of The Gadfly. Published October 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.7 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/4e70a71b4b71a0c681bbb4514c6f9f6d.pdf 9c7d3cd55746b378f5009d5a88bc1089 PDF Text Text LY TH ~ I �T 0 H E n Monday, The Chrnnicle of Higher Edu.cation reported on Paul V. Anderson's ('87) career as an adjunct professor at Wilbur \X'right College in Chicago. Anderson, The Chronicle explained, was drawn to \Vilbur \Vright "because the college's curriculum focuses on using primary texts, just like his alma mater." Anderson had originally applied for a full-time professorship there. He was \Vorking as an academic advisor at the University of Chicago when Wilbur Wright asked him about teaching humanities part-time. Since graduating from St. John's College, Anderson earned a Ph.D. in comparative literature from Northwestern University. In an email to The Gadfiy, Anderson praised our faculty for its "high level of competence and dedication compared to every other educational institution where [he has] studied, taught, or worked." Recently, Anderson took up another part-time teaching job at the University of Chicago, in addition to his advising job there. It has been "always difficult for me to tun1 down an opportunity to teach a class," Anderson told The Chronicle. "It's part of who I am as a professional." Did he have a favorite tutor during his undergraduate years? "In no particular order other than alphabetical," he told us, W E E K REVIEW "Wendy Allanbrook (now at Berkeley), Ben Milner, and John 'White." A figure dressed as an Imperial Stormtrooper roamed around Mellon Hall on Tuesday morning. A few students, believing Senior Prank had come early, returned to their rooms and slept. D oug Plummer, a photographer hired by the College, was mingling with students near the quad on Wednesday. Plummer, who is from Seattle, was holding t:vvo cameras by tl1eir straps, including one with a characteristically white Nikon lens shaft. "I'm trying to insinuate myself with the student body," he said. ''I'm not here to take stereotypical, glossy photographs of college students." On his blog, Plummer described St. John's as "a stunningly amazing institution" but tl1at he would cease to post various photos he ha,d taken around campus due to "a couple of incidents of too much candor iliat have gotten [him] in some hot water." He explained in the blog' s comments that he has "learned to be exceedingly careful when discussing a client." ·what was that about? "It has to do with something that happened several years ago," he told The Gadfly. "It has nothing to do wiili [St. John's]." PHOTO llY DOUG PLUMMER - THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 I N C ollege-admission-essay.com, which bills itself as "The Largest College Resource on the Internet," published several nonscientific rankings of American colleges and universities on 111Ursday. St. John's, Annapolis, was ranked eight out of "The Top Ten Schools for the Pious." The website, which is run by a New York Citybased limited liability company called the Penn Group, did not respond to emails asking for the criteria used in determining their rankings. T utor Gabriel Pihas conducted his first round of sophomore paper conferences in ilie coffee shop on Friday. Pihas, who is teaching a math tutorial this semester, is known to conduct studentteacher conference in the Coffee Shop due to his "nostalgia" for tl1e place. "The Fishbowl didn't exist twenty years ago," he said, adding that it "feels icy." Pihas recalled how the large central table \Vas knovn1, in his day, as the "tutor table," where a student could hover in hopes of finding a particular tutor. Pihas said the Coffee Shop encouraged "more socializing between tutors and students." He acknowledged, however, that the school was much smaller at the time. '!Ir' Send ocmrrences of note to gadfly@sjca.edu. WWW.DOUGl'LUMMER.COM �Why Do We Mere Sophistry: The Swine Flu Study Ptolemy? Soccer vs. Basketball The Lingerie Football League PAGES TH GADFLY THE SnJDENT WEEKLY OF ST. JOHN'S COLLEGE • A.\JNAPOLIS, MA.RYLAND • VOLUME XXXI, ISSUE VIII his index puts him at the very top of physicists) or, instead, call attention to scientists whose work goes by unnoticed? And since I'm v.1iting for The Gadfiy, would an endeavor like the h-index be useful to St. Jolu1's? {ESSAY} The Science of Seminar How do you measure intellectual influence? KEENAN TROTTER I D ming my second Don Rag of freshman year, one of my seminar tutors told me that, despite his colleague's suggestion during my prior don rag "to speak up more," I had not in fact spoken more. This comment shocked me. I thought I had made an effort to talk more. (But who knows?) Gathering myself, Was there some kind of threshold? Do tutors sit down in their studies-or, maybe, in the faculty lounge, wisps of steams rising from ancient ceramic coffee mugs-and think, perhaps out loud, "How often did Mr. Trotter speak these past four months?" Further, what does a conversation about how often someone speaks even sound like? What was I supposed to say? Actually, I may as well intone, I totally spoke more this semester. And then what is your tutor going to say? That's Tight! You did speak more! No and no. Such an exchange is, for the reason of certain tutor pri,;ileges, impossible. The content of your thoughts supersedes their quantity, but the latter, in retrospect, is much easier to measure. According to that Wired profile, Hirsch came up with the h-index because he felt frustrated by the usage of purely subjective criteria to judge scientists. In Hirsch's world, it is not a grade at stake but a job, an award, a career. He answered a demand for a more objective system. Wouldn't it be nice if we had something like that? many times each has been cited. Say paper UNIVERSITY OF CA..UFORNLA.., SAN DlEGO, SUBMITTED A number one has been PAPER ENTITLED "AN INDEX TO QUANTIFY AN INDJVIDU.A..L'S cited 10,000 times. Paper number two, SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH OUTPUT" TO THE PROCEEDINGS OF 8,000 cites. Paper THE NATIONAL Ac.@EMY OF SCIENCES, A1'l ACADEMIC JOURNAL. number 3 2 has 3 3 THIS \XZA.S HOW HIRSCH WORDED HIS INTRODUCTION: citations, but number 33 has received just "For the few scientists who earn 28. You've published 32 papers a Nobel Prize, the impact and relwith more than 3 2 citations-your evance of their research is unquesh-index is 32." tionable. Among the rest of us, how does one quantify the cumulative Hirsch's paper was and continues to impact and relevance of an indibe very, very controversial. Scores of vidual's scientific research output? scientists like Michael Wendl, the physics In a world of limited resources, scholar, have called the h-index useless such quantification (even if potenand irrelevant. (Wendl proposed his tially distasteful) is often needed own metric.) But look at the tone of this for evaluation and comparison criticism: It wasn't that Hirsch was stupid purposes (e.g., for university faculty to believe you can measure reputation; recn1itment and advancement, it was that he had his numbers vvrong. award of grants, etc.)." Hirsch's index gave birth to more than t\venty other formulas (and counting) Hirsch's solution to the problem of to quantify a scientist's impact. They quantifying an a scientist's influence include the hg-index, the g-index, the turned out to be rather simple: a-index, the r-index, the ar-index, the mindex, the h(2)-index, and so on. ''A scientist has index h if h of his N 2005, }ORGE HIRSCH, A PROFESSOR OF PHYSlCS AT THE or her Np papers have at least h citations each and the other (Np - h) papers have ~h citations each." When Wired profiled Hirsch last May, that magazine put it this way: "Take all the papers you've published and rank them by how C an you put a number on reputation? According to Hirsch, and the attendant influx of indices purporting to accurately portray a scholar's impact on the scientific community, yes. But would such a number be useful? Should the h-index, or the z-index, or whatever, entrench extant reputations (Hirsch's critics have pointed out that I I 1 CONTINUED ON BACK PAGE THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 �COMMENT Blechl On History and The Program- The Infinite and the Finite (Part II of IV) M aybe I have given a rather idealistic account of the activity that goes on within our community. I wonder if any Johnnie doubts tli.at such an account is the end goal, but I would be foolish if I did not touch upon the undercurrent felt deep within some of our members. No city is perfect in the ideal sense of the word, and even the best examples can always be improYed upon. Opinions differ in how to go about effecting such possible changes, and we even differ as to what should be the subject of improvement. Proof is seen within the classroom. Some classes are more tyrannical, others oligarchic, and still others democratic. There is also evidence outside of the classroom in the talks of students amongst themselves and with faculty where more formal suggestions are offered. No Johnnie is ever completely satisfied with the "St. John's experience" for various reasons. Far too often our complaints get lost in logos and our still maturing minds. To an e.xtent we are victims of our own creation, always di.inking of the best thing to say long after the discussion has moved on- sometimes in a matter of minutes or weeks. These lost opportunities fester within us and explode in incomprehensible ways at various junctures. But we are only partially to blame for this. TI1e remaining fault-and I would go so far as to say it is the majority-falls upon the actual Institution that we ourselves give life to. The Program is exactly that, a program. It is ruled by, more than anything else, the great destroyer, Time. We are allotted only precious moments to read, digest, internalize and contemplate the most beautiful intellectual works of the Western world. Optimally we are given just enough time to grasp the work before the Program pushes on to some other Great Book and the process is repeated continually for four years. Even in the works where we spend a gTeat deal of time, we are left feeling as though we have missed far more than we have caught. l do not wish to suppose that we are not without certain resources to marginally counter-balance this grievance; I am thinking of our tutors, who may quickly recall or offer a vital piece in order to assist, and the assistants for the specific tutorials. But even then we are David facing Goliath, and there is not a hig enough stone to be found. Now, we are gently assured of a positive outcome by the very life that t11e Program suggests is the best: the contemplative life will, by its very nature, compel us to re-examine these works in our own time and in our own way for our own purposes. The C:Jreat Books are great for n.vo reasons: they contain within their covers a wealth of opportunity to continue to learn from them. More importantly they are great because they possess a strange quality that we often overlook, and that quality is endurance. These Great Books are not going anywhere, and even if our personal libraries were to burn down (heaven forbid such an injustice to occur to any of us!), we can replace our copies easily enough at any bookstore in the Western world. In addition, we only read a portion of most of the books, therefore an even smaller portion of any author, and the Program does not encompass all the Great Authors. Thus, we are overwhelmed by all the work we still have left to do after graduation in order to obtain the fulfillment of the task the Program gives us. This task of becoming educated lengthens with each passing year. As more and more worthy hooks are added to the already lengthy list, we are reminded. of a cartoon scroll, if fully unravelled that rolls onto the floor and out the door. Mike Lacy_ On Why We Study Ptolemy O n a plane from Xi'an to Shenzhen, China this summer, I fell into a depressive spell of circular thinking. Void of input from entertainment or learning, without the ability to engage friends or impress girls, this happens to me, and it is sometimes very unpleasant. If anyone reading di.is cannot relate to the discomfort of being alone with their thoughts, I consider them blessed. Our plane landed, and as \Ve went through the airport, I was miserable about being so miserable. TI1en I met Fiona. Our assigned tour guide for the city, Fiona was 23, spoke accented though excellent English, was bubbly and adorable. She immediately began speaking to me. I instantly felt cool, and being of nearly average height in this foreign land, believed I was not without a chance. She said to me: "Michael, is it true that you are studying philosophy in university?" "Well," I said, staring absently past her, "it's not actually a univers... but yeah, yeah I do." "Oh," she smiled, but then shook her head confused, "I don't understand how you can study philosophy in a class ,, room. "\Veil," I said, prepared to give the standard SJ breakdown. "Do you just sit around," she continued, "and not talk?" BAM 1 East vs. West philosophy just clashed head to head in the parking lot of the Shenzhen airport, like two luggage carts racing towards each other beside the taxi line, one holding Aristotle (clutching his toga), the other with Confucius (cross-legged and serene). I don't know much about Eastern philosophy (not that I know much about Western either), but I have a desire, or perhaps even a need, to align myself with some philosophic order, if only so that my air travel is more enjoyable. Even while visiting a Buddhist temple in Beijing, the most connected I could feel with this realm of living life is through a biography I read of Andy Kaufman, a devout Transcendental Meditation member. Can I ever fully infiltrate this type of philosophy? Stringfellow Barr seems a little apprehensive. "On the whole," he states in The Genera! Magazine, 1940, "I'd stick to our conversation, the one that started in Greece, not because the one that started in China is no good, but because we already half-understand our own and had better .finish the job." A concerned friend might say to me: "You're looking to be happy, and looking to ancient books of philosophy to solve that. \Xlhat the # *@'. are you doing? What you need is a psychologist." And l' d say to this friend: "I don't know if there's a difference benveen philosophy and trying JOHNNIE QUOTES - (While reading Kierkegaard) Ms B: 'Tm apprehensive about the past." Ms B2: "Oh. no! What's going to have happened?!" ~" THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 �-] c be happy. And to disconnect phiand psychology so firmly seems irrational, because, until take medicaall psychology can is provide self-knowledge, a seilH<~n<:rw1e I've found beneficial. Doesn't deconstruct the human soul using Doesn't this feel Aristotelian?" I'd then recommend mv friend research a nevv treatment .proven called 'Dialectical Behavior Therapy.' Then, we'd stop being friends. So, if I find some connection between our accepted modern source of happiness and ancient philosophy, should I give some credit to ancient sources! I'm thinking about Ptolemy, just as we finish him as sophomores. He aims at his philosophic actions. Happiness how I interpret an ordering of soul, what Ptolemy claims we have to gain engaging in lv1arhematical Philo;ophy. To do this, he says we must to try to increase continuously our love of the discipline of things ·which are '"'lut they are, by learning what has been discovered in such sciences those ing themselves to them, m~king a small original contribution st;ch as the pe~iod of time from them to us could 1ve1l make P'-'""'u'c \\Then speaking of people first discovering order in the world, Mr, Flaumenhaft--put it to me thus: They find you've got this tremendous numerical regularity; this was knrn.vn even before Pythogoras. In Middle East, the Babylonians \Vere verv at predicting what happen way up there. on the basis of looking at numerical tables. Then you get pecple vvho say what is going on up there is things going round. And it turns out you can tell by drawing circles of certain sizes, and configuring them properyou can have things moving while not changing. So Ptolemy claims that by studying what is constant in the world around me (in his opinion, the stars), I might rightly order my During periods like the Enlightenment, this orderliness seemed to descend to and now we have other sciences as mathematically 0 M J\f N T secure as astronomy, such as biology, and even psychology. Can't ·we argue then that whatever order Ptolemy derived frcm rightly engaging in astronomy we might derive from now7 But \vhy didn't this come from Eastern philosophy? Edward 0. \Vilson paraphrases the Chinese Historian Joseph when he of the older Chinese philosophy, this view t:he entities of Nature are inseparable and perpetually changing, not discrete and constant as perceived by the Enlightenment thinkers." Based upon this rese:uch and reasoning, I will attempt to engage in \vestern Philosophy to quiet my soul the next time it is disquieted, The Eastern stuff is obviously phony. But then Ficna was so happy m meet me, so little about me. questions test results about fatality rates in humans. This can mean one thing: are \Vorse than reported in all we are all going to die. The Health Center has promised HlNl vaccines to the student body, but alas, it is too late. \X/it:h the confirmation of these first two casualties of the imminent Swine Flu Epidemic Extravaganza (as it has been dubbed by Filipino newspapers by my rn.vn translation), we are sure to see a rapid spread throughout our cloistered campus where the virus has undoubtedly been lying dormant in several as yet non-symptorn.atic carriers. I have nm a computer sirnu!ation of the most likely spre;d of infection, a mean mortality rate and period. The scenario is this: since Patients Zero and One are freshmen, the infection will spread first freshman dorms and seminars. Now, one might expect the infection to stay confin~d to since th_ere are no shared classes~ t11eir dorrns are exclusively freshrnen~ tt 1s year, so the natural social St. John's student interaction s some of you remember, 1 hung up my Mere nd ink last year. a situation so dire that I could not help from comrnenting on has arisen. lt has come to my attention that two St. students have come down with the H lN 1 strain of influenza, commonly referred to as 'The Sv,.ine Flu." One of of these students has been sent and the other has been quarantined to her room under lock and key. While these measures are admirable, there is still nrnch to be done. As I am a St. Job.n's student who keeps abreast of the happenings in "the outside world," I am well aware of the need to speak as as possible about situation and make complete pariahs out of the infected; however, these crucial medical responses are only the of the prophylactic iceberg. Many have accnsed the news media blmving a simple mutation of the common flu virus out of proportion in order to scare consumers and ramp up sales of othen.vise useless items, like flu masks and hand soap. But the inconvenient truth is that the CDC has been strangely silent on this issue and has been dodging barrier. there are chinks in the epiden1ic,..preve11ti.11g arn1or t118t hopelessly compromise the situation, even if we were to round all the freshmen and freshman Rr-\s up and quarantine them in the Chasement, like they did in tl1e Civil War. The first common infection vector is Pinkney. Even 1vithout common rooms, it's still a gen11ophobe's floors of nightmare, vvhat with close proximity, poor sanitation, and not enou_gh exits. The is iI~trarnc.rals . ~the Hustlers would have been immune, except they to play against teams actually have fresh1nen come out for them. And the third is the overeager upperclassmen who have wasted no time in seducing freshmen and will anything, including break for some barely legal lovin'. In short, the whole campus is screwed except for maybe a few room-Johnnies in Spector and Gilliam. To I say: flee while you still can. I hear military is holding out in Riverside. remember to have a fortitude check before rnninto the daylight. computer simulation shows that about 359-() of the is im- THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 �COMMENT mune to the common strain of seasonal flu. Since the delay in our reception of the Swine Flu vaccine I imagine is due to its only mildly effective nature, I have derived a mathematical formula for simultaneously calculating the probability of being immune to Swine Flu and the mean velocity of an electron over a series of quanmm orbir.s. Needless to say, the proof is very complicated, and I (like our lab manuals) will spare you the difficult mathematics. 1ust take it on faith that the math works 0~1t to a little under 1%, so only about four of us will survive. As there's no \Vay to determine which ones of us will be immune, we need, as a community, to prepare for the eventuality that most of us will die and our reanimated corpses (as has been reported happening in the Philippines) will begin roaming the campus and the streets, attacking any form of sentient life at the slightest provocation. I'm no trained epidemiologist, but I have played a lot of video games, so I can outline a basic strategy for the continued survival of those happy few who survive. First, we need weapons and ammunition. Pistols, pump-action shotguns, and SM Gs are a good start, but assault rifles, automatic shotguns, and hunting rifles are optimal weaponry. In addition, we need to assemble a series of Molotov cocktails and homemade pipe bombs with beeping fuses (which will draw the attention of the infected to them) and stash them around campus so there are always supplies wherever survivors go. As the H lN 1 will have already destroyed the infected's higher thinking capacity as well as their fine motor skills (though, strangely enough, not the ability to strum a guitar and sing Bob Dylan songs), we need not worry about the infected using our own weapons against us. As far as tactics go, keep to confined spaces, make sure all exits are sealed off, engage the infected only in bottlenecks, use Molotovs and pipe bombs wisely, and, above all, stick together. Don't just run for cover at the first sight of danger, leaving your fellow survivors at the mercy of the horde. Remember, too, that the H lN 1 virus is a mutation, so watch out for warning signs of mutated infections, and be sure to find out their weak points. That's about all the help I can give you for now. Buying the PC game "Left 4 Dead" will probably increase your chance of surviving the Swine Flu Epidemic Ex- travaganza, so try to pick up a copy before your loved ones start coughing up lungs and turning into the walking dead. Pay very close attention to all the media hype surrounding Swine Flu and then double it to deterntlne how bad everything really is. Because honestly, there's no such thing as being too paranoid. lf you want to live, this should be your mantra that you repeat over and over: better safe than sorry. Blee Barks Soccer vs. Basketball W but not affecting it. One wonders if the writer of Ecclesiastes had soccer players' arms in mind when he declared, " ... all is meaningless, a grasping at the wind." Is it any wonder that soccer appeals to communist countries while basketball originated in the Land of the Free and tl1e Home of Larry Bird? Furthermore, soccer is a stingy sport, yielding two or three goals in a typical game. Basketball is generous and inclusive-everyone shoots, everyone can score and, ipso facto, attain prosperity unto holiness. Or is it holiness unto prosperity? I'm not sure. Aristocratic soccer bestows one player special privileges: a "keeper" who uses his hands to prevent otherwise worthy shots from entering tl1e goal. This is inglorious. In egalitarian basketball, "goal tending" is properly recognized as a crime tl1at is legislated against and swiftly penalized. The physical action of basketball is closer, geographically and theologically, to the heart, mind and spirit of its practitioners. The only time the action in soccer approaches the heart, mind and spirit is when the ball strikes the player with great violence in tl-1e head or chest. Photos of soccer players "heading" the ball clearly show facial expressions rife with existential angst. 0, wretched peril! Conversely, when a basketball comes in contact with a player's foot, play is immediately stopped and Grace restored. When this world passes away and paradise reigns again on the earth, I doubt you'll see a single soccer ball in the new Jerusalem. Until that day, we must proceed from one evolutionary step to the next. As you learn to \Valk erect, you switch to basketball . ...- ich is the superior sport, occer or basketball? It is asketball. Does this question matter? Yes, it does. Is it even possible to differentiate the moral qualities of the two sports? Yes, it is. Most importantly, do we have the courage to do so? Yes, we do and we shall. A casual analysis would note a few similarities. Each sport has a predetermined number of participants per side, the length of each contest is governed by a clock, and each gives the player opportunity to perfect his tl1espian skills as he writhes in pain attempting to deceive the official into calling a foul (though soccer players are especially duplicitous in this regard). TI1e most fascinating differences involve which sport is the most noble, that is to say, the most spiritual. In this respect, basketball is clearly the superior endeavor for the human soul. Soccer, hyperbolically called "TI1e Beautiful Game" by some, is of the earth. Players are obliged to cast their gazes downward at the staccato, lurching moveBlee Barks is the pseudonym for the author, ments of each other's inelegant feet. Bas- who wishes, for obvious reasons, to remain ketball aspires for the Eternal as particianonymous. pants reach for heaven, fluidly propelling their bodies and souls ever upward. TI1e basketball players' arms are open and outstretched, ready to offer gifts to the Creator in the form of shots released, while receiving heaven's bounty in the 56 Maryland Avenue form of rebounds. SocTel: 410-263-2066 Annapolis, Maryland 21401 cer players' arms hang Fax:410-263-4647 shop@smokeshopusaltd.com impotently at their sides, www.smokeshopusaltd.com reacting to the action, JOHNNIE QUOTES - (While reading The Aeneid) Mr L: "He's clearly changed in the underwear. .. I mean, The Underworld." THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 �COLUMNS {DODD ON THE Ql!AD} I Literally Hate Literal Masks I mean I hate actual masks. I guess figurative masks are pretty hateable as well, but that's outside the scope of this article. KIRSTIE DODD I t has been exactly 100 years since Gaston "Butterface" Leroux first published The Phantom of the Opera, and since then we have been reeling from that heinous book's catastrophic effocts. The book, which has probably been read by a total of three people, including the copy editor, was immediately made into a Broadway musical and seen by everyone on the planet. You might caterwaul, "Well, I never saw The Phantom of the Opera," but ask your mom-I bet she saw it when you were in the womb in its late-eighties heyday (that counts). In case you were locked up in a musty cabinet and didn't receive your correct measure of pop culmre education as a child, let me briefly summarize the plot: there is a masked musical genius (named "Erik" in the original novel...a French It's not. If I'm against the idea of masquerades in general, I'm especially against the idea of holding one at St. John's. In a school of five hundred where one sees a person's face 4.2 times per day on average, the thought of sudden, complete mystery is not intriguing .. .it's terrifying. Think about us ]ohnniettes; we women, the distinct minority, must settle on this campus mantra : the odds are good, but the goods are odd. Masks, grotesque and perverse by nanire, create parity amongst the men that we ladies simply cannot afford. TI1e same danger sometimes rears it.s head for men (re: Nikolai in \Var and Peace when he is ensnared by Sonia's Hussar getup). Review for a moment all of the movies vou've seen with masked characters/masquerade balls. On~s that readily spring to my mind: The Mask, fa1er After, Masquerade, A Cinderella Story, '!~You~oK Is b~ W\'n\ 1'-\AT t.ctCU.. '/00 U\Q!.. ( A ~tom.I!~ ~~T'O~ ~TJ Te.U... } novel about Scandinavians ...what?) who lives in the bowels of the Paris Opera House, extorts the managers, haunts productions, and falls in love with a stupid girl v.rith daddy issues and a so-so voice named Christine Daae. There's a brief love triangle drama between Christine, the Phantom, and this pansy named Raoul, and the story ends. This would all be tidy and nice if it weren't for the scene that glorifies the masquerade (or as some pretentious jerks or Englishmen might pronounce, "mask-err-ahhhd"), a very particular type of Bacchanalian in which people think it's a good idea to get dressed up in wild costumes and wear masks-kind of like Halloween. This could not be a dumber idea. Yes, it might seem fun to take on a new appearance for a party and obscure one's identity. It might seem fun to don a mask like a facial Ring of Gyges and liberate oneself from any beneficial de facto social rules. It might even seem fun to sacrifice one's T-zone around the eyes, nose, and cheeks region, making tl1ein sweaty and acne-prone, all for the sake of a "good time." Scream, Vanilla Sky, Batman, Sugar and Spice, and lest we forget, Halloween III: Season of the Witch. What can you determine from this list (other than, 'Tm glad Dodd is not the movie archon")? That's right-this list proves with 100% accuracy that movies with masky plotlines always prove tragic watching experiences and should be relegated to the back rooms of all Movie Galleries. This rigorous argument brings me to the main thrust of this article. 'V{i'hen you pick out a Halloween costume with a mask or an outfit that involves heavy makeup/face modification, beware. You'll have to deal with Halloween store temps, and I'm not sure you want that (where do they go the rest of the year?) Remember tl1at hiding your appearance from the world is not free license for lecherous activity. And conversely, don't come crying to me if you have to repel unwanted advances at the Halloween Reality party because you decided to cover up your hook nose and broad, unattractive brow lines with an attractive mask. I've warned you. You put on a mask, and you've passed the point of no renirn . ....- COMlC BY PAUL MORRILL THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2 �ATHLETICS {REPORT} The Week in Sports Reflections on Draft Picks, Judgment Day ROBERT SALE force in Frisbee (even when two captains are sideline fixtures). Josiah Stevens is also looking like a fourth round steal with his formidable soccer defense. Otherwise, a fairly average draft. Verdict: 6 out of 10 The hustlers also drafted, though you might not know it from their turnout. True to hustler form, JP Snyder decided to mortgage the future for a championship shot this year. Taking Luke Wakeen over Andrew Mize or Ezra Doucet is looking questionable now, but his sports are basketball and handball. Third-rounder Ben Hooker is looking like this year's Mike LeBlanc. It looks like the hustlers are just banking on trades this year. Verdict: 3 out of 10 S o, it's been awhile since I've \vritten a sports article. I realized that I couldn't attend all the games by myself, and thus I'd be doing some teams a disservice by underreporting them. And that's just not the St. John's way. Also, the Mighty Fine Green Waves lost a couple games here and there, and I couldn't bring myself to relive those painful moments. But now, I'm going to break the "recapimlation" mold of my previous articles and deliver some hard-hitting sports reporting, since reporting is the closest Mr. Pickens will allow hard hits to come to the upper field. So, in order to be fair and balanced in both my coverage and my harsh judgment, I've decided that it's time for a draft report. Basically, I'll go through the draft picks made at the beginning of the season for each team and say how good a job the captains did. • We start with the Druids, just like the draft did. At first glance, they really seemed to clean up: their top five draft picks all come out consistently and have a positive in-game impact. John Fleming THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 and Ezra Doucet especially are multisport threats. Nevertheless, the rest of the team is still reeling from years of the, "Hey, let's only draft for soccer" strategy. An excellent draft, but the Druids are still rebuilding. Verdict: 8 out of 10 Next come the plucky Spartans. Honore Hodgson has been a solid draft pick, dodgy shoulder notwithstanding. Jesse Rundle, third-rounder, has given the Spartan soccer team hope and an air of respectability. Although, one man can't make wins appear out of nowhere. Finally, there's the ine.xplicable case of drafter's remorse where the Spartans dealt second-rounder Alton Lind for Sam Frank (and presumably other considerations). All told, a slightly above average draft for the men in blue. Verdict: 6 out of 10 Third, we have the Guardians. Linus "The Feeder" Feder may have been the steal of the draft with the way he has impacted the Guardian spirit. He is dangerous on both sides of the football, has soccer skills recalling those of Ian Lindquist's Guardian heyday, and a is Finally, we come to the Green \Vaves. No real earth-shattering draft picks here. But unsurpassed in consistency and depth, Gil Shank has been arguably the biggest impact player drafted in the second round. Tim Reilly has been the only real disappointment in the \Vaves' draft that has seen their sixth, seventh, and eighth round picks come out and make big plays. Tim, if you're reading this, we miss you. Verdict: 9/10 • That's it for the draft analysis. Now, this should all be taken with a grain of salt as the hustlers managed to win all of their games until October and have only lost once per sport. But then again, they do have three more games to play against the Green Waves . .....{ATHLETES OF THE WEEK} Miss Perry (Pictured Above) & Mr. Feldman (Left) Congrats. �A T H L E T I C S {OPINION} The Lingerie Football League I'm not a pig. I swear. J.P. SNYDER I was recently told via Facebook by the _ ppletini's own Manann Mays A that I understood Kunai. I wasn't quite sure if she meant soccer in general, which I don't under· stand or enjoy, or Kunai as an organization. Set aside the fact that this is her first experience with Kunai, whatever she meant is inconsequential except in its inspiration of this article. l will now attempt to elucidate what I understand about Kunai to the masses. About five or six years ago, a new all-women's sports league cropped up called the LFL. The Lingerie Football League is an offshoot of the Lingerie Bowl, which started to appear during the halftime show of the Super Bmvl. Much to the chagrin of wives everywhere, the LFL is 7-on-7 indoor football league where drool-inducing women wearing bras and panties tackle each other. I know most of the guvs and at least a few of the girls are thinking, "Wow, that's awesome! Where is the nearest team and when do they play?" The rest of you are probably forming some idea about how I am a n~isogynistic jerk and waiting on baited breath for how I am going to bring this back to Kunai. Well exhale, because Kunai is the exact opposite of the LFL. TI1e LFL exists for the sole purpose of entertainment . TI1e Lingerie Bowl draws millions of viewers from eighty-five different countries. TI1ese women, in peak physical condition, most of them having played varsity sports in college, are some of the most beautiful worn.en you have seen. They are paid to be ogled while they run around in practically nothing. Nothing about the LFL is designed for the betterment of their participants' souls. TI1at's not to say that there aren't great women who play for them; but the organization is not designed for them, it's designed for me. Kunai is exactly the op· posite. Kunai is devised for the express purpose of benefiting its participants. TI1ere is one area where Kunai and the LFL are quite similar. They are both not really even about sports. Sure, it's neat that the women in the LFL are athletic; and playing a sport that many males love adds to their allure. But if they were all wearing burqas nobody would watch. Kunai is not about soccer or basketball. TI1ose "hell bitches" could be playing any sport, and it \Vould not make a difference. The point of Kunai is not about how well one plays, hmv many spectators are watching, or how in-shape it makes you. It is about participating in something where all that matters is your willingness to show up and your desire to enjoy yourself. Some of those athletic purists may disagree with me, but this is my philosophy while I am refereeing. This is the reason I don't call every handball, why I let some travels slip, and why I'll blow my whistle early to save another goal from being scored on a team that's already clown by four. There are few things as heartwarming and as-beautiful as watching ; ·girl who has never played a sport before struggle every Tuesday and Friday, only to see her persist in her attendance; then see it one day just click. She might not be the best out there, but suddenly she is unrecognizable from her former self. She either scores a goal or makes a basket for the first time and her eyes light up while every other player, on both teams, recognizes this jubilation and are proud of her. This is not something you can find in professional sports. This is not something you can find in a player whose only objective is to win. This is only something that can be brought about by the unconditional support of people around you and your will ingn.ess to try. I used to be of the opinion that Kunai was "sport for the sake of sport" in its purest form. I have diverged from this opinion. It is sport for the sake of the felicity and betterment of the participant brought about by supportive like-minded individuals. I know I often bitch and moan while I'm out there (because in some aspects it is just a job to me). But 1 am also jealous. I have been ingrained to such an opposite view of athletics that to find this in sport is jarring, yet oddly fascinating. It continually draws me in. I'm hooked. \Vell, that and it is women playing sports in shorts and occasionally sports bras ... ""' JOHNNIE QUOTES - (\Vhile reading Kierkegaard) Ms B: "Be more distant in space from me! I'm trying to remain illusory." THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 200 �T H Of vast existence, in the darkest of abyss, I see distinctly peculiar worlds, And, an ecstatic victim of my own clairvoyance, I drag along serpents which bite at my heels. And it is from that time that, like the prophets, I love so tenderly the wilderness and the sea; l11at I laugh amid grieving and weep amid feasts, And find a sweet savor in the most sour wine; That very often I take facts to be lies, And that, \vi.th my eyes toward the heavens, I fall into holes. But the voice consoles and says: "Guard thy dreams; l11e wise have none so lovely as the mad." EI {LlMERICKS} From the Accordian Tune of the Same Name -Gabriel Luzier l11ere once was a Lady of Spain who hijacked a black choo-choo train. She flew o'er the plain through buckets of rain, and for this she was counted insane. l11ere was a young Lady of Spain who flew a centrifugal plane. It spun out of control and dug its o\vn hole rather circular, just like a drain. l11ere \Vas a cute Lady of Spain who round the block pushed a long chain. Said a man with a dog who was rather agog, "You can't push a chain! You must refrain!" 0 0 l11e question, dear reader, today, one for which your attention I pray, is: who was agog, the man or his dog? It's been bothering me all night and day. -Jerome Dausman {POEM} {TRANSLATION} Catullus Parodies Sappho The Voice My cradle was leaned beneath a bookcase, A sullen Babel, where novels, histories, and fablesLatin ashes and the dust of GreeceAll mingled. I was tall as a folio When two voices spoke to me. The one, insidious and firm, Said: "The whole earth is a cake packed with sweetness; I can give you a hunger of equal size, And then your pleasure need have no end! And the other voice: "Come! 0 come travel in dreams, Beyond the possible, beyond the known!" And that voice sang like the wind on the strand, A phantom cry, one knows not whence it comes l11at caresses the ear though it frightens. ' And I answered: "Yes! Gentle voice!" It is in That hour that one can, alas! name my wound And my fate. Behind the scenery THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 l11e mi par esse deo uidetur, ille, si fas est, superare diuos, qui sedens aduersus identidem te spectat et audit duke ridentem, misero quod omnis eripit sensus mihi : nam simul te, Lesbia, aspexi, nihil est super mi ... . . lingua sed torpet, tenuis sub artus flamma demanat, sonitu suopte tintinant aures, gemina teguntur lumina nocte. otium, Catulle, tibi molesnun est : otio exsultas nimiumque gestis : otium et reges prius et beatas perdidit urbes. • ~ I I I ! I I �although it t\vankle and sway. Tii.at man to me, even godly seems; Tii.at man! If it's just, leaves the gods grounded. Who constantly sitting opposite you Sees and hears Sweet you laughing. Which, from wretched me, Thieves all sense. For the instant you, Lesbia, I've seen, nothing is left me. But falls tongue slack, down limbs a thin Flame drips,~clatter-coining Ears ring, wrapped eyes tv\'in Day and night. Leisure, Catullus, vexes you. Leisured, you swoon and exclaim. Leisure kings past and happy Cities doomed. (Under Green Sun) If we were a warbling wax, cast back to endubble-drenched sweezles of 0, I would be a god prince and you a freckled doe. But we're not, all must swear, underneath a Green Sunwhether you slobber Pink rot or sleep snug with a gun. -Carolyn Zelikow Oh we're not. No, we're notunder the hot Green SunNot a single one of us, not even one. (Pong-Pong Ponds) If you whistle and a whistle responds, somewhere through the somewhere air look to the ponds the blushing pong-pong ponds 'W1i.ere an ugly glance is something rare, and lilydrops grow on the lilydrop trees up, high up, in tli.e something air. (More Nonsense) Clawing as a beginning clicks and lzzes through the Pines: Evergreen and Ready to Rollbut never the less at a crawl, {POEM} (A Warning) \X-'ith a naked Buzz upon the air, Tii.roughout Squeeze Jordan's Blood Plum groves, there are many foreign weeds and things that give a grom-Girl strength as she sings. For instance, the orange striped African fern, can, boiled just right, yield an African Tea, can strengthen tremolo, if slurped in the Dark, can deepen even a Bloog-hound's bark. Or if you dare, you can pluck a Tiger lily from a particular swamp. Give it the Barest Orp of a kiss, and swim in your own melodorous bliss Onlv the Blood Plum kills the voice. Despite its delicious Twang and Taste, avoid it if you can, with care, I move a moving and lick a Black Brow asking 1, 2, 3 .... how oh how can I loop round a morning without a Flunk Ruzz Blast? And send a sneeze to dust to dust .A.s I'm moving Frog and fast. ~ -Chris Johns : {MISSIVE} 1heYear0ff 'W11.y taking a year off is a dead idea: l. It ends with a preposition. 2. When used legitimately, it is merely a euphemism. 3. It is based off/on what? 4. I myself it seems would rather travel. Let it be that we each take on a year. -Anonymous THE GADFLY. OCTOBER 2009 § "' �FROM PAGE T HRE~ C urious with this and other questions, I emailed a few tutorsabout ten of them, none of whom have or had me in class-and received one reply, from 1.H. Beall, who turned out t~ be very helpful in addressing some of my concen1s. Beall, who wasn't familiar with the h-index but was knowledgeable with similar efforts-namely, the Science Citation Index-felt wary of using something as scientific, as cold, as a formula: I don't think that one's participation in Seminar could be judged by such a method. I am sure that you have seen how a comment early in a Seminar has turned a discussion slowlv toward new insights int; the text. Yet the person who provided this idea will in many cases never have his idea directly acknowledged, except later, when upon reflection, you retrace the argument to this seminal contribution. T11is is something tl1at requires judgment. It certainlv cannot be done with, any numerical scheme. 0 I don't know about tl1at. The biggest problem with applying the h-index to a formal Seminar is that students often fail to cite their peers' ideas. (In even tl1e lowest circles of academia, saying something like "What some of us are talking about" or "I think someone just said" would be intolerable. It might even be called plagiarism.) Tutors, in particular, are very good at citing their student's ideas. (And, in truth, it makes seminar more of a conversation, instead of just a bunch of successive, loud comments.) So what would happen if every student was like that, if every contribution that'sprouts off another's idea is automatically pref. aced-automatically cited-by acknowledging the "seminal contribution"? Take a freshman Seminar of, say, tvJenty students, presented as a string of numbers starting with the number of times the most active contributor spoke, and ending with the least active member(s). 15, 14, 14, 13, 12,8,8, 8,6,4,4,4,3,3,3,3, 2, l, 0, 0 Let's say tl1at tl1is remains the basic patten1, \Vith some variation, for the whole year. Is that how you assign grades for contributions to seminar? Do you give Ns to Mr. 15, Misses 14, 14, and 13? (And what if tl1ese are the most egregiously banal, the most aggressively bad, contributors?) Can we replicate Hirsch's metl1od, using his index to solve a different-but, perhaps, just as important-commdrum? That is, how do you fairly determine who gets the professorship? The grade? Or tenure, or a prize, or even just a job? Is our working model to just talk a lot? Mr. Beall acknowledged what seems to be the hardest problem of Seminar, stating that he and other tutors "try to notice how someone THE GADFLY, OCTOBER 2009 helps to shape and move a Seminar by the quality of his or her conversations and comments." He added, however, that this effort is done "imperfectly." THE GADFLY 60 Cc,Jlege Ave-nu(· L et's take another look at that freshman Seminar. (Remember that they are perfect at citing their peers.) T11is is the same string as before, but with an added statistic: how many times the person was cited by his or her classmates: Annapolis, Maryb.nd 21401 United States of Ameri~a Editor-in-Chief Junior Editor Kin.""tie Dodd EH:abeth Spagnoletti Design Editor J. Keenan Trotter B1i.siness Manager Marin Skokand1c Graphii.; De.~igner N;.1ah Litvin Adt'eTtising Director Contributors Philhp A.."'IDV J0hn Bled\l Jerome Dau;;man Chris Johns Mike Lacv 15 (3), 14 (6), 14 (5), 13 Gabriel Luzier Robert Sale (2), 12 (4), 8 (10), 8 (3), 8 (9), 6 (1), 4 (5), 4 (3), J.P. Snvder Carol~m Zdikow 4 (2), 3 (3), 3 ( 1), 3 (2), 3 (4), 2 (2), 1 (0), 0 (0), 0 (0) The winner, Ms. 8, was mentioned more than three times as much as Mr. 15, despite only talking almost half as much. Still, tl1ere' s something distasteful about putting a number on a conversation. St. John's doesn't require standardized test scores, we shun college rankings, and we pass or fail our music and algebra tests. Yet the yuck-factor is hardly an argument against the usefulness of objective standards. Beall stated that assessing a seminar "requires judgement," which is exactly right. A number would give us a clearer picture, perhaps. It's just not feasible. And if it was? \Ve would stop citing each other; civility would end as we know it. (And, despite my frustration with not knowing what is and isn't "talking more," maybe I don't want to know.) Plus tl1e approval of your peers is an imperfect test of pretty much anything. Look at our Program: we celebrate a long history of studying unpopular people (in their time) and their unpopular ideas (at their time). Socrates, when he died of forced suicide, had an h-index of zero . .,... F ounded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapo· !is campus. Opinions expressed within are the sole responsibility of the author(s). The Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most proiessional, informatiYe, and thought-provoking newspaper which circumstances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less haw'· a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. TI1e Gadfly meets every Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the Barr-Buchanan Center. .t\11 articles are due at 11:59 PM every Friday. Errors printed herein are, mostly, unintentional. Usually, typos, misspellings, and general false· hoods are the product of the human oversight, as opposed to malice. TI1e cover graphic originates from the 1950 yearbook. lt was processed for lnDesign by Noah Litvin. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 12 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 8 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-10 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 8 of The Gadfly. Published October 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.8 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/af433543e5a38abc50f8d4d02190a59a.pdf 3d1c22c29c1c15c8f01ffc764b515713 PDF Text Text L nm STUDENT WEEKLY OF ST. JOHN's COLLEGE • ANNAPous, MARYI.AND • VOLUME XXXI, ISSUE IX TH E ~GAD F LY �T H I S Abraham Llncoln, John Willces Booth, and[?]. Paul Morrill Crime Beat APPROXIMATELY 3:20 A.M. on the morning of Saturday, October 3 lst, ffi.cer Hare entered the Pinkney dormitory and pulled the fire alarm. All residents were required to evacuate the building. As security checked through the building for the next fifteen minutes to find anyone still asleep, the students congregated outside on the damp cold bricks. There was no information given as to why the fire alarm had been pulled. Some speculated that it had been a routine drill since there was no evidence of a fire, but the absence of a fire marshal to conduct the drill ruled out that theory. At approximately 3:35 AM, the fire department arrived. After going through the building for five minutes, they determined that there was no fire. Students were then allowed to re-enter the building. Upon re-entering Pinkney, it was discovered that some one or many persons had discharged a fire extinguisher over the western stairwell and surrounding hall- ~THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 W E E K ways as evidenced by a thick layer of white powder coating all flat surfaces. This attack with a fire extinguisher is presumed to be the cause of Officer Hare pulling the fire alarm. Special Investigators Morrill and Dougherty were already present at the scene, both being residents of the dormitory in question. At approximately 3:40A AM, Morrill and Dougherty began an investigation of the scene of the crime. They discovered a fire extinguisher missing from the western stairwell on the second floor. Dougherty split off to find the missing fire extinguisher, while Morrill continued to explore the crime scene. He discovered that the extinguisher dust ended on the third floor stairwell, before the stairs to the fourth floor. At this point Dougherty rejoined Morrill, having found no trace of the missing extinguisher. They proceeded to reconstruct the events of the crime. Apparently, the culprit or culprits began their attack on the third floor at the bottom of the stairs to the fourth floor. Morrill discovered the pin to the fire extinguisher on the third floor, but the pin was contaminated by Officer Hare before Morrill could pick it up with his pen and send it back to the lab to be analyzed for dues. The pin remains in Officer Hare's custody. From the dust pattern, it appears that the culprit(s) discharged the extinguisher in front of them as they ran down the stairwell, holding the extinguisher at approximately chest level with the nozzle pointed slightly down. The tops of the stairs, the walls, and the hand rails were coated along with the floor. As the culprit descended, they sprayed the "pod" part of the hallway on the second floor, either intentionally or incidentally to their path down the stairs. The run was finished on the first floor of Pinkney, where the culprit is presumed to have exited through the back door towards the Chase-Stone dormitory. The culprit is presumed to have been intoxicated and as such would also have been yelling as they ran down the stairwell firing the extinguisher. Soon after the attack, according to Of. ficer Hare, a concerned student found him and alerted him to what die student perceived to be thick smoke in and emanating from Pinkney. This student is presumed not to have been the culprit given a lack of fire extinguisher dust coating their body. At this point, Officer Hare entered and pulled the fire alarm. At approximately 3:50 AM, Special Investigators Morrill and Dougherty ended their investigation for the night. No footprint evidence can be found for the culprit because of the many footprints from evacuating students that destroyed any trace of the culprit. Interviews have yet to be conducted of the students involved. It appears that there were no witnesses to the crime, and the culprit is still at large. John Blechl Outside Eyes and Classroom Dynamics - Part III of IV A major taboo in "Johnnie-Land" is fithe incorporation of outside sources. The general feeling is that they somehow cheat the overall "St. John's experience" because they introduce a short-cut to the ideas and philosophies offered by the Program. Often times I hear the ancient chant of those who feel that if Barr and Buchanan wanted these sources with the Program they would have, in their infinite wisdom, made room for them. A shorten version of this complaint against outside sources is the familiar "stick to the text" objection that many offer. However I am constantly perplexed as to their reasons. I fear that we Johnnies have become such slaves to tradition that we never question them when, ironically, we question everything else. I wish first to give proper credit to the objection against outside sources. Most apparent is the instance where someone brings into the class discussion an outside source and it distracts from the general spirit of the conversation. Focus is taken away from the reading and placed instead on the normally-obscure reference given by the stuqent. This tangent is both alluring and dangerous, like the sirens upon their rocks. For whatever reason, the par- �Vampire Weekend, RZA••• Recapitulation Watch Out For Cougars Poetry& Translations PAGE6 PAGE7 PAGES BVG PAGE4 ticipants feel compelled to investigate the new information given in order to understand its place and why it was offered. Suddenly, and normally a good length of time has passed since the offering of the outside source, the class realizes that they have gone a ways off topic and look to the tutor for assistance to regain their bearing. And even if something productive has been accomplished in the tangent, the class finds their ability to regain the former topic stuttering. The overall feeling is that the tangent was a distraction. To guard against such an interruption means to disallow such things in the first place. I sympathize with these objections and will even confess a partial leaning towards them. But to prohibit any such instance because there are some instances that do actually distract the conversation proper seems unreasonable. Instead of allowing an open market on such occurrences, I propose, like everything else that we do, a well regulated option. But before I offer such an option, I feel that my reasoning needs to be explained to hopefully quiet the loud objections that will inherently ·• follow. I give as evidence the authors them- selves. Look no further than freshman year for sufficient proof. Plato himself gives us the thoughts of Socrates, an outside source in regards to his own philosophical doctrine. Aristotle also spends lengthy portions of his works bringing in other philosophers (normally in order to refute them) in order to make his point clearer and more profound. Aristophanes' comedies are solely based on what is going on in Athens at the time; the importance and very comedic element depend on the fact the audience knows what is going on outside of the play. The Tragedians follow suit, as the Oedipus Cycle, the Orestia, and works by Euripides are based on mythology and, in some cases, on each other. Looking at these works independently of one another means that they lose comprehension, and we are left with that prevailing sense of lack. This fear continues throughout the Program, whether it is in the Scholasticism of sophomore year (the refutation of Anselm's ontological proof of God as given by Aquinas and many others), the Cartesian-ism and German Idealism of Junior year (to say nothing of the interesting situation of the Empiricism in Britain), or the fallout of Positivism senior year where philosophy is literally trying to regain its footing from the usurpation of Kierkegaard, Niettsche and Comte. All of these philosophers stem from one another, and thus the Program tries to combat the need to understand this by reading the authors in roughly chronological order; however, the looming sense of despair lingers in the halls. To understand even the individual text, and thus "sticking" to it, becomes problematic. Look no further than Dante's Divine Corned,, a book during which I read more footnotes than actual text in order to gain an inkling of how much I did not understand the overall spirit he presented. The same goes for Aristophanes. Each new author only compounds the problem of not understanding fully what he is saying or, more importantly, why he is saying it. As much as we would like to believe that these great men stood apart from the world around them, it would be foolish to enter into any reading thinking this was the case. It is precisely that we do not understand what is going on historically that we do not know how to interpret Epictetus and Lucretius, Plotinus and Au- THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009~ �COMMENT gustine, and all that follow. Freshman Lab again attempts to counter this idea, but even in our first year, where the classes seem to most closely coincide with one another; there still is a need for something more, some other supplement to fully draw together all the various writers in order to understand the situation as a whole. Another measure already in place is the every-so-often metaphysical discussion at the ends of epochs which try, quite feebly, to accomplish the idea of a cohesive progression in the Program. This need becomes more and more of a necessity when progressing through the Program; by Junior year the Program has become so fragmented that it seems like the tutorials are moving in different directions and thus does the luster of St. John's dim and begin to look more like every other university. Chazaq Llinas _ Music Review "Horchata" by Vampire Weekend The first single released of their upcoming album Contra, the follow up to their blog buzz break-through self-titled debut, Vampire Weekend flaunts essentially the same sound from their first album. An uppermiddle class Columbia indie rock sensibility mixed with afro-pop rhythms and five-dollar words. The track plays around with a surfer-rock boardwalk feeL "pincher crabs that pinch at your sandals," that makes us want to forget this November chill and go back to Ocean City in August. With upbeat punkish interludes and a xylophone carried melody, VW is filling up a tonal space that was absent on their debut. Bottom line, if you like Vampire Weekend, you will like the track. If not, don't expect much. If you ride the fence like me, give it a chance. Live: Dirty Projectors w/ GIVERS Have you listened to Bitte Orea? If not, do so right now. This year's best band plays a fantastic live show as well. The rumored twelve-hour rehearsals are apparent with an album-quality performance. There are no mistakes with the Dirty Projectorsjust pure, calculated gold. Opening with "When the World Comes to an End," the female voices interplay and bounce off of one another like pinballs. Hitting their essential tracks off of Bitte Orea, "Temucla Sunrise" and "Stillness is the Move," ferocity is seen in the pure talent. Opening was Lafayette-native GNERS, offering down-to-earth dance-pop (and a little ska) that you couldn't help but move to. Two fantastic performances, two great bands. Go get the year's best album, Bitte Orea, and listen to GNERS on MySpace. ponse: First off, I want to contulate one Mr. Blee Barks (yes, I assuming he is male) on his excellent Gadfly article. In case you missed it, it can be summarized thus: soccer sucks, and basketball is better. Many people I have talked to recently were under Sundries: "The Tao of the Wu" by the RZA the false impression that I myself wrote the article. Though I could not agree with The RZA, aka Bobby DigitaL best known Mr. Barks more, I did not write that aras one of the founders of the Wu-Tang ticle. I thought many times about writing Clan has recently published a philosophi- such an article, but I did not write that caVmemoir described as "a nonfiction article. I do love The Upright Posture, but I Siddhartha for the hip-hop generation" did not write that article. It was almost as (Penguin Group USA). Here's a Seminar- if someone had purposefully written that worthy quote: "Jewels are minerals, com- article to make it appear as though I wrote pressed pieces of earth, stacks of crystal- it. But I did not write that article. line carbon. What gives them their shine There are several tell-tale signs that I did not write it. A) Though we have similar styles, Mr. Barks appears to be a much better writer thap myself. Difficult to admit but nonetheless true. 2) I most s'urely would have included the quote, "Basketball is poetry in motion" and some reference to the superior skill and athleticism involved in basketball in my article. III) Do you really think I would use a pseudonym? Honestly? That's just not my style. In conclusion, I wish I had written this article, but I did n~t. Recap: Alas! Bobby \&ijAT ~l<Es ·nus c..u.-s~ So Sale you have forced me to come to the l'..O""f01LlA~~ \-S T\.t~ defense of virtue and HI t.dl "f~ c.ouNT. truth (something I rarely enjoy doing). Your completely obliviis their history. When a man recognizes ous recap of the draft was borderline blashimself, he recognizes his true jewel and phemy. (Not to God, as he doesn't exist, his body expresses that wisdom. He be- but to the only gods whose existence is evicomes a jewel himself. If his mind is sharp, dent: the sports gods ... Most of them are the way he walks and talks has a certain Yankees fans, by the way.) I'm surprised beauty about it. Attain wisdom and you while loo\dng back at the draft that you have all the bling you'll ever need." yourself were not turned into the pillar of salt that was necessary to swallow your COMIC BY PAUL MORRILL ~THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 JP Snyder Res_ponses, Recaps, anaRuminations �COMMENT article. I take no real issue with your scoring of the Druids, Spartans, and Guardians. Even your analysis of whatever team you are on, though vastly overrated, was at least based on logic. Your judgment of the HUHS-el-errs I can only assume was the result of drinking too much Hateraide. You know Luke Wakeen was the right choice, not only for prodigious handball and basketball skills, but for his unquestionable moral fortitude and his hustle. Also, a more observant spectator of the draft would have recognized that the Spar· tans purposefully chose Alton Lind over Sam Frank in order to get what they could in trade value from the Hustlers. And you did quite a disservice to Nick Wein· stein in not mentioning how vital he was in this trade. The addition of Lind gives the Hustlers one of the most dominating basketball B teams since the Druids B team was forced to play A Lind, Wakeen, Gore, Gentry, Welsh, with Coover's base· line shot and Mackey's killer pivot. .. does anyone really think they can keep up? These points could all be chalked up to you wearing blinders during the draft, but your last two points were outright lies. You know for a fact that Ben Hooker was not taken in the third round. The Hustlers traded their third round to the whatever· waves for Mr. Welsh. You would be hardpressed to find a third rounder who has been more valuable to their team's success than Mr. Welsh. Yes, he suffers from occasional bouts of waveism but they are get· ting less frequent, and he is getting over them. This makes the contributions of Ben Hooker, who has a job that keeps him from many games, all the mote valuable as a fourth round pick. Fortune favors the bold, and that is what the Hustlers have been. Only having lost two games so far and without having played the sports for which they drafted, despite the subprime mortgage crises, it looks like this loan will be paid off with a championship. Rumination: There are a few well known facts about Campbell Hall. The thermostat only works in extremes, the first floor bathroom is disgusting thanks to the drunken folks from the quad who are too lazy to walk down to the coffee shop, and the walls are embarrassingly thin. I bring this up because the other night, as I was lying awake in bed contemplatin g my own awesomeness, I heard grunts and groans coming from the room next to me. Patrick Beeby now claims these noises were from the cartoons he and Honore were watching. After the love noises subsided, I heard the faint whisperings which I could only assume was pillow talk. The subject of their whisperings turned to yours truly as I imagine most people's post coital conversations do. It was said that, from my recent article, people where actually starting to think of me as an okay person rather than some· one who makes them hate themselves by not living up to my greatness. This was quite disconcerting to me. The truth is that I relish being perceived as a jerk from my writing. In normal interactions I find it immensely difficult to succumb to the allure of douchebaggery. No matter how hard I try to be an jerk or the bad boy, I'm still just a nice guy. But when I start typing, all that goes away. I don't have to picture the audience reading this and am thus free to live out my fantasy. (And if I find who keeps tearing down my signs, there will be hell to pay; seri· ously, I've been taking boxing just for this occasion.) Jesse Rundle Report on Board of Vistorsand Governors Meeting L ast Friday and Saturday, Mr. Pasley and I represented the Annapolis undergraduates at the Board of Visitors and Governors meeting. We sat in on committee meetings that discussed admissions, alumni relations, and the Leibniz calculus manual. We also attended the plenary session of the board where the important decisions are made concerning all aspects of the college. The board is composed of sixty people that love St. John's College. Other than the presidents and deans, board members are often alumni of the College, though some have come to love it without ever attending. The board is the principle governing body of the college; it reviews and approves tutor appointments and budgets, it hires the president, it manages the long-term sustainability of the college, etc. I notcied that often times the board's discussions were centered around how goals can be achieved and did not address the why. This concerned me at first, but as the meetings progressed, I began to see that this question had not been forgotten but that it was so foundational that it did not have to be discussed at every turn. The board is dedicated to the principles of the college and, in fact, it is the board that establishes these principles. Ultimately, I was impressed by the expertise and insight that each board member brought to the table all for the sake of maintaining and improving the college that we all love. Now for some of the highlights. 1. Admissions: The admissions procedure at both campuses has recently been revamped and greatly improved on both campuses. The College has invested in new materials, new technology, and new methods for reaching prospective students. The College has brought in an outside consultant to help us think about how we present ourselves to prospectives. In light of the recession, in the coming year, the College faces an immense challenge in attracting a talented and diverse applicant pool, and the new methods in place in the admissions offices on both campuses should help to address these issues. 2. Alumni Relations: The Alumni Association, which is a separate corporation, is undergoing a transformation in order to better meet the needs of alumni. The goal of the association is to keep alumni involved in the College through seminars and other events. The alumni are an essential part of the College, and the association strives to keep them involved. The board members expressed that alumni want to know if St. John's is the same college they attended, if the program is the same, and if the College is sustainable. Surprisingly, webinars were proposed as a way to keep alumni informed on the state of the College. One day, you may be watching a webinar on the state of the College from your New York City office. 3. Junior Mathematics: Mr. Burke, Mr. Lasell, and members of the SCI were present to discuss the new calculus manual for Junior mathematics. The Instruction Committee made the decision to change manuals, but the board wanted to hear why the decision was made and how the changes are affecting students in the classroom. Everyone seemed to be satisfied with the expertise and care that Mr. Burke and with Mr. Lasell h ave given to the new manual and will continue to give as revisions are made. Santa Fe THE G ADFLY , NOVEMB ER 200 9 -....it!! 'I I �L E T T E R S move, and tries to go there faster. This might seem brutish and crude, and it is, but this can be especially good A~Response for us. As defenders we learn how to stay calm in order to make the best decision. As offenders we stay in control while striving for a specific end. An athlete's ' will is strengthened and confirmed every ports seem to me to be different than most activities we do here at time he or she is able to score a basket, St. John's. They are a wonderful make a goal, or even get a good pass off. opportunity to take a different approach. It is ex:hilarating to work towards the I mean that in so far as we do things like goal, and for no other reason except that converse and sing, we are working with you and your team want it! other people. Most of the activities we An athlete needs no other encouragedo include all of our classes: seminar, ment except the end itself. This is wontutorials, and for this consideration espederful, because anyone can do it. You cially chorus. We sing and converse with can be an athlete by striving to play well, other people. By working together, we even if you've never played before. It is create a song or build a conversation. empowering simply to do this, playing as Why is soccer or basketball any differ• hard as possible, regardle5s of whether or ent? A conversation can be furthered not your team actually wins. by listening to someone else's confusion Healthy competition is in the true and making sense of it. A chorus listens spirit of athletics. I agree with Mr. Snyto itself in order to get in tune. An alto der: Kunai is not really about sports. It tries to make their note sound with the is not about trial and error for the sheer other parts in harmony. For these types ecstasy of trying. Kunai is about someof activities we work with each other. thing quite different, which, don't get me This has its own virtue. wrong, probably has some virtue or other. In a sports game, however, we do not Yet it feels nothing like the immense take the other team's fumble and turn amount of living that can be done in it around in a way that makes sense to one decision-invoking moment of glory. them. We do not let them get a touch on Kunai has a great feel-good atmosphere, the ball. Neither does a defender dribble but is it really as much fun as creating a with an offensive player headed towards moment in which it seems everything, their own goal. They defend against the every force you cannot control, is at work approaching player. A good defender against you? -SOPHIE MlCHELEWICZ interprets where an offensive player will Athletics to J.P. Snyder S ~THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 and Annapolis are now closer in their approach to Junior mathematics. 4. Finance and Sustainability: In light of the current global economic recession and the ensuing changes in the tax code, the college faces extreme difficulties. Despite that, the Chairman of the Board made it clear that neither are we in a panic nor are we teetering at a financial cliff. The Board has appointed a Sustainability Committee that is working towards innovative solutions that will maintain the College's financial health into the future. It became clear that the College faces difficulties because of some of its principles, such as maintaining a student teacher ratio of 8: 1, and maintaining a need-blind admissions procedure. Nevertheless, the board is dedicated to upholding these principles while understanding that our principles are worthless if the College does not exist. In all of these discussions, I realized that St. John's always is and always has been changing. Without a thorough grasp of the history of the College, I cannot judge what caused these changes-whether they were due to financial difficulties or a change in principles. Has the College iniprc>ved? Should the College be moving in a direction? How much must the College change as the world changes around it? The answers to these questions affect all members of the College whether or students, faculty, alumni, or board members. Mr. Pasley and I will be leading a discussion on the BVG meeting at the SCI meeting this Thursday. We hope you will come with questions. �COLUMNS route to a friend's house party. They stared at me, their designer bags slung lasciviously over their powdered shoulders, and I had the strangest feeling that they were actually sniffing me. Yes, I think they could smell my smooth, post-pubescent flesh, and Disillusioned Johnnie Men Read Phaedrus, Tum to Cougars they were out to kill me. It was then I realized they viewed me as competition. _ KIRSTIE DODD DOTQ: But the feeling is mutual, right? KD: Yes, I suppose I'm threatened by them, too. I can't sweeten the pot with a hefty financial portfolio ... sing a powerful algorithm created by The Gadfly's perDOTQ: Do you think you could take a coug? sonal idiot-savant (he stays locked in the office filKD:Huh? ing cabinet...don't worry...sometimes we bring him a DOTQ: Could you take a coug? grilled sandwich from the dining hall when he starts yelping KD: Like in a cage fight? too loudly) that employs Ptolemy's table of chords, the current DOTQ:Yep. campus beard-to-mustache ratio, and a series of very impressive KD: I mean, no. I can't fight anything that I cannot underHjelmslev transformations, we at The Gadfly were able to ascer- stand. Chronophiliacs-sic?-make no sense. tain that the Cougar-Johnnie relationship ratio is up 10% this DOTQ: Do you have any other insights worth repeating in year. This increase has been on the rise ever since 2005, when print? Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore entered connubial bliss and KD: No ...but I t..1-iink Pha.ed:ru.s might have something to do blew up the tabloids {age difference: fifteen years). with this whole cougar trend. Socrates says something like, "As The cougar trend has been around for a while, but burgeoni..11g wolves love lambs so lovers love their loves." I think by "wolves" Johnnie interest in cougars is new. Apparently, campus males are there, we could extend it via wild mountain animal analogy to becoming interested in " ...women in their forties who smoke, the cougars of today. I guess that means that Socrates could predri.."'lk, ar:d go to clubs to pick up young men in their twenties. dict the future; Socratic pederasty is simply a prophesy about the Cougars are usually divorced, sometimes with cubs, and finan- modem cougar institution of today. Johnnie boys read that stuff cially independent" (this definition is from cougardate.com, a and t..liey start to think beyond the typical college relationship dating website run for cougars and their potential consorts). age range, which can be a.."'1.ywhere from high school age to mid/ Desparate Johnnie men are unconcerned about the official"rul: late twenties. of social acceptability for age disparity-also known as the halt DOTQ: I see. Well, look at the time! I have a 2:20 to catch... your age plus seven" rule: KD: Also, I think ABC just gave Cougar Town full season pickup ... Age of Older lnciividusl _ Age of YOunger lndi"ddufli ~ + t ye!l.i."'S. DOTQ: Um, can you leave? {DODD ON THE QUAD} If They've Still Got It ..... U 9 "' Last week I conducted an interview wit.ii Kirstie Dodd, senior from Orlando, Florida, to glean her thoughts about this new cougar epidemic bouncing around campus. We met in The Gad.fly office. She, dressed in a navy sweater (nauticai theme), was drinking seltzer water (with lemon) in a to-go cup. She sat on the office's (floral-pattern) couch. DOTQ: So, um, why do you think this coug stuff is happening? KD: Botox. Ever since that wonder drug, t..h.ese women are out in full force. And I guess women's lib is helping too-whatever that is. DOTQ: How do you identify a cougar? KD: You can see them every Saturday night around 11:30 pm, without fail, lining up outside McGarvey's, O'Brien's, Armadillo's, and Federal House with their friends in their typicai weekend regalia: French press nails, spray tans, stillettos, cocktail dresses, fresh coifs, the lurid look of boy-desire in their eyes, and the scent of embalming perfume radiating off their wrinkled flesh. DOTQ: Ever met a cougar? KD: The first time I ever encountered real live cougars in the wild was in 2007 when I walked past O'Brien's late at night en KD:Okay. So there you have it: the attractiveness of an older lady derives ultimately from Socrates. Or maybe just the cougar herself. Demi Moore puts it perfectly when she told newspapers, 'Tm an incurable optimist and a go-getter-it's in my nature to focus much more on what makes me happy than what makes me nervous." And what makes you happy, GI Jane? Younger men. {ATHLETES OF THE WEEK} Ms. Fernandez and Mr. Vanichstfan THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009~ �T H E Profanity and Swollowables B urning fruzz is what I'm after, and no two wonks about it. I come down a long corridor or hallway thirsting for the stuff. Left and right my gammy-gaze plunders the broken flesh-wallowers. Will it be of my lady luck's cruel designs tonight to nab some suitable cohort? 0 Nasty, I pledge my heart and whole to you. 0 Nasty, I plunge my soul. May it bring you honor or else me descent into your wide and giggling gutters. Like water I am poured out, and my bones collapse like gel. Be not far from me, all you who can smell. For Frankincense or Frankinstink wheels equal through the skiey gas: the first will be the first and the last will be the last. For burning fruzz is what I'm after, if even the petitest deekle of a grom-girl's snooze. To taste, to tungle, to bask in love most fecal, and scrape loose the belly-crusts to on bellycrusts cruise. A R T S You pour out to him hope, youth, and life And pride-that treasure of all destitutionWhich makes us triumphant and like the gods! Allegra Bisbee) Eli"""'°1ief Kirstie Dodd ]Mniar Edirar Three Johnnies -Chris Johns Lonely Wine The strange glance of an elegant woman, Who glides towards us like a white beam That the wavy moon sends to the trembling lake When she wants to bathe in her nonchalant beauty there; The last bag of money in a gambler's fist; A wanton kiss from the scrawny Madeline; The sounds of a debilitating and coaxing music, Like the distant cry of human pain. 0 deep bottle, all that is not as good as the penetrating balms With which you tend to your faithful keeper' s Heart, which has been corrupted by a pious poet; O Congratulations to Caleb Nolen for being the first person to solve the last math puzzle! There are no lines that can't be crossed When writing poetry. Your stanzas you might well emboss With vile profanity. You might cross lines of silliness with Seussian-type words. Or cross the line of friendliness and curse fresh milk to curds. You could pen out such lofty words Of proud pomposity That flit your thoughts like dainty birds Above a clear blue sea. You might crawl down to stinking sew'r To dwell in filth galore And find your hoped-for joys are few'r And mad.hess is much more. When we presume to create verse Responsibility Falls on us for good or worse To write in harmony. There are no lines in poetry That crossed out cannot be. And when I pen disharmony I've crossed the line, you see! Danny sucks rotten eggs . . , . _ T H E GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 E!i.abeth Spagnoleai D.siir> Editor J. K.cnm Trom:r Busm..s MA._,. Marin Skolcmdic ur three Johnnies are having another conversation. As a reminder, the junior always lies, the senior always tells the truth, and nobody knows what the sophomore will say. They are brought before a tutor who wants to identify the sophomore. Person A says: "I am not a sophomore." Person B says: "I am a sophomore." Now Person C is in fact the sophomore. The tutor asks him: "Is Person B really a sophomore?" Can Person C give an answer so that he doesn't identify himself as a sophomore? Crossing Lines But it's Fruzz, too bad, I'm after after after. If only yearning gags brought more than nasty laughter. 60 College A..,.ue Annapolis, Maryland 21401 Unim:I St2De5 of America -Charles Baudelaire (Translated from the French by -Elizabeth Fleming Blong! Blong! To ease the Honk! Blong! Blong! To Wrestle! Blong! Blong! To stutter and Stonk! When one wants only to nestle! THE GADFLY Gniphic Anist Noah Litvin ll<luonmng Di=tar Ph.illip &my Contrilnam Allegra Bisbee JobnBla:bl Jerome Daumum E!i.abeth Fleming aiJoe Gmabwg OuisJohns Q,azaql.lm.s Sophie Michelewic:z Paul Morrill JC$1C Rundle J.P. Snyder F ounded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus. Opinions expressed within are the sole responsibility of the authot(s). The Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, infurmat:M; and thought-provoking newspaper which circum· stances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submit· ted will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all sub~ions except under special cin:umstances. The Gadfly meets every Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the Barr-Buchanan Center. All articles are due at 11:59 PM every Friday. Errors printed herein are, mostly, unintentional Usually, typos, misspellings, and general falsehoods are the product of the human oversight, as opposed to malice. A Correction: The poem by Gabriel Luzier in the last issue is actually a translation of a Baudelaire poem. He (Gabe) is not crazy, in case that's what you thought. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 9 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-11 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 9 of The Gadfly. Published November 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.9 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/1211c819888eb8510dbed86d18728f45.pdf 27e2116f2c8551a8ca1abbc1db37554f PDF Text Text �T H E o is the Vice resident of t. John's College? It's Barbara Goyette, who was sitting in her office on Monday. "I work with the outside world," she told The Gadfly. ''Alumni, fund-raising, lobbying for state and federal government." Like a good number of staff, she's teaches, too. "I'm not actually a tutor, though" she explained. "I lead executive seminars," which the College's website describes as "seminars for professionals and executives in a number of cities" such as Philadelphia and New York. (Annapolis is on the list, too .) Goyette said she especially likes seminars on poetry. "[Professionals and executives] don't think they can discuss it," she said. 0 n Tuesday, The Chronicle of Higher Education reported that St. John's College became one of the fifty. eight American colleges to charge over $50,000 in fees. (St. John's is the smallest school in the country to break the $50,000 mark.) The Chronicle also reported that college and university presidents' pay rose by about 6.5 percent in 2007-2008. What did the presidents of St. John's make last year? According to a report by The Chroni· de, which looked at IRS Form 990 filings, Christopher B. Nelson, in Annapolis, took home $262,500 in salary. (Michael Peters, Santa Fe, reaped $244,041. Nelson told The Gadfly that neither he nor Peters controls their own salary.) According to those same IRS filings, Nelson posted an "expense compensation" of $120,917, which The Chronicle defined as "fringe benefits that the IRS requires those leaders to count as income." Peters, though, posted a much smaller amount of those fringe benefits. ($39,889, to be exact, for a difference of over eighty thousand dollars.) What was that about? "There are differences in the appraised values of the 2 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 W E E K I N REVIEW dermanship), while the aforementioned literature feature mostly black candidates. Wednesday night, The Arundel Muckraker, an indepedent investigative website, quoted Cohen as saying, "Today Annapolis voters sent a clear message that they want to raise the bar at City Hall." Cohen, according to the latest numbers, won by over two hundred ballots. 0 REPORTED BY KEENAN TROTTER WITH ELIZABETH SPAGNOLETTI CONTRIBUTING homes that the two Presidents are required to live in," Bronte Jones, the treasurer of the College, said. (She explained that the College reports a percentage of each home's appraisal in the "expense compensation." Otherwise "the expenses associated with operating the two Presidential offices are relatively the same." Jones also said that the filings are two years old. T he mayoral race ended Wednesday, with Joshua Cohen '94 declared winner. The election was rife with turmoil stemming from several concerns. Cohen had actually lost the Democratic primary earlier this year to Zina Pierre, who stepped down after it was discovered that she was severely in debt and might not have fulfilled residency requirements. And on Monday, The Capital revealed that part of Cohen's campaign was mailing postcards to the third, fourth, and sixth districts of Annapolis (created early this decade to form an African American majority) which informed their recipients that Cohen was quick to endorse Barack Obama before his presidential campaign became viable. Causing greater consternation was the fact that postcards sent to "whiter wards" endorsed mostly white candidates (for positions like Ward 3 Al- n Thursday, Elizabeth Fleming, a math assistant and senior, was sitting in the Coffee Shop, dispensing help to flustered stu· dents. She explained to one student the addition method of solving simultaneous equations. The night prior, ~ number of sophomores and some intrepid freshmen attempted the Algebra Exam. How did they do? "The sophomore class? Better than [I] expected," Fleming said. W aves and waves of parents crashed the quad on Friday, attending classes and following their children around campus. Two of them, a mother and a father, were watching their son demonstrate a Euclid proposition in the Lower Level of the BBC, just outside The Gadfly's office. Were they having a good time? Yes, they were. Their freshman progeny wished, for whatever reasons, to remain anonymous. "Oh, no, this isn't for The Gadfly, is it?" he asked nervously, erasing the board. Sophomore Luke Wakeen appeared on the sidelines of Friday's Kunai games holding a glove and baseball. Anticipating an old-fashioned catch with Sam Frank, he "felt like the kid who jumped in the pool when no one else did but said they were going to" when Frank showed up empty· handed. He prefaced his metaphor with the fact that he last played baseball in eighth grade for the seventh grade team. "I had bad eyesight," he explained. �This November Tea With Socrates PAGE4 My Meeting with Apocalypse Now? Ms. Waters Soon? PAGES {ON HISTORY AND THE PROGRAM} PAGE6 PAGE7 tion and thus to decline and eventual dmvnfall (Sparta) but embracing fr obsessively (or "going-to-the-well-too-often") or blindly also leads to destruction (Athens). Change needs to be instituted under careful supervision by St. John's finest when the need truly calls for it; tlms correctfer. To place a further load on top seems ing a problem and not needlessly changstrikingly unfair to both the students and ing something just for the sake of change the faculty. St. John's is a small communi- and securing the vast tradition that is ty and its numbers and activities are regu- such an important aspect of our College. lated on purpose. Adding to the curricu- With all of this being said, the option I lum seems burdensome in all regards. But propose is to somehow integrate history to allow this continued injustice to prevail in its proper sense into the Program. I seems far worse a situation. If modifica- understand that such measures have been tion is the answer, then we seemingly run noticeably avoided in the past but I ask, the risk of not heeding Aristotle's warning as a citizen of this polity, for a better exabout changing customs. But I would like planation than what has been given to me to point out that Aristotle is not against in all my searching. I am not alone in my such acts, he is against performing such fears about what the Program fails to offer acts needlessly and often (and thus ap- and how its shortcomings affect our abilpeasing the flux of public opinion which ity to realize that ideal goal of our beloved by its very nature is prone to constant education. If such a drastic measure as movement). Rome suffered a similar in- adding a history tutorial is unreasonable stance, offered by Plutarch in a reading (though the benefits would be vast and that we sadly do not have time for, under would lead to less work in finding out the rule of Camillus. A city is something "the why." It would help bring together that has its own life, and to live means to tl1.e entire Program, solidify our o~m edube in activity. Disregarding the notion of cation and demonstrate the true authority improvement leads eventually to corrup- tl1.at our Program supplies to us-as well Opinions and Requests - Part IV of IV What is the Program for? by John Blechl I do not want to call for any kind of corruption amongst our blessed Program; rather I feel, in all due respect, that by its structure the Program limits itself in unnecessary ways. This limiting seems strange when placed into tl1.e overall context and mission of the Program. The Program opens so many doors and leaves us, as President Nelson has so acutely noticed, with more questions going out than when we started. So why does the Program seem to turn its back on a fundamental aspect in understanding the very heart of itself? Again, I feel that Time is to blame. If the measures already instituted are not enough, what can be done? In other words, how can we improve the "St. John's experience" and the education found here? This question has no simple solution. The Program is already rigorous in every sense. Any one of us can spend the entire night studying and never even begin to exhaust all that the readings of- THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 3 �COMMENT as others inquiring about our educational system and those affected by Johnnies in the "outside world") then I would ask that modification in ideology be investigated. This could be easily brought about by simply making it a point (until it becomes a tradition) to remind ourselves of the historical context of the Great Books. This could be done in a variety of ways, from summer reading to tutors gracing us with their knowledge on the subject or just simply asking that kind of question, or even a once-a-week lecture bringing the students together and talking about the world in which the upcoming authors lived (these lectures could be drawn up and even just given to the students, in one of those expensive manuals, to be studied in their own time). There is, I feel, already an urgent need to reopen this investigation and I place trust and faith in the community to handle such a need appropriately. After all, the goal of the polis is not only to live, but to live well. If any of my words have offended and I have overshot my mark, place and intention then I beg forgiveness. I do not wish to make enemies within my own community, for strife at home is the worse kind. I hope that this offering stays in line with the general and distinguishing spirit of our Institution by promoting healthy and productive discussion at all levels in the College. If a possible solution can be reached (accepting that it would not come in my own tenure at the College) then I would feel that we have contributed back more than any Senior Gift ever has. For what are we but the last generation to those that follows us, and ancients to the ones that follow them? Should we not feel compeiled by duty to leave St. John's better than we received it, furthering the inheritance for those that follow and actively contributing to the endurance of our beloved school, and thus look back upon our time spent here-how very small it actually amounts to in the end!-with pride and honor? I I {WEATHER} i One Month of Solitude I Inside the mind of Blake Myers ... I j by Blake Myers I ts "high time to get to sea" to quote a book I haven't read. It's not even that cold yet. Hell, daylight savings happened today. I got an extra hour of sleep, but, to tell the truth, it didn't help. All it did was make things darker sooner and myself get less done in more time. Half of my laundry is still in the dryer, which I set to dry again as I didn't want to deal with it when it was done the first time. I have a hope that it will fend off the wrinkles from setting in, but I don't really expect it to. Too apathetic to cook, too apathetic to microwave a tortilla with some cheese on it, I ate corn chips and Pace while watching people talk about football games I hadn't seen. I'm not even a big fan of football. "Sixty Minutes" just never began. The TV was probably set to the wrong channel. I dunno, I never really tried to find out. I guess I'm writing this. That's something. I've started to reconsider the chances of a car hitting me when I cross the street. I figure they're higher than I've led myself to believe. You forget that some don't always make it a point to slow down for 4 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 pedestrians. So that's been on my mind< Heard the geese leaving, laughing goodbye to us none migratory sorts. Good riddance I guess-I never really saw much of them while they were here, won't be much different when they're gone. Save for the cause of their leaving. It really is a fairly analogous situation to the canary in the coal mine-geese just don't have the dignity to die. I don't mean to be glum. It's just an awkward period. S.A.D. is starting to get higher on the ecliptic. We've been around the same people for a long time. The weather's no longer really nice, but its not cold enough to burrow in for the winter. I'm getting more tired, smoking more, exercising less than the little I already do. The walk to school: is longer, my room: more messy, my jokes: less funny, my girl friend ...well, actually my girlfriend is still at the same level of non-existence as she's been for some time, so that's not actually worse. And once again, I don't really mean to be glum. It's just that Candide is just as depressing as it is funny. All I mean to say is that a synch or two in my belt wouldn't do me any harm. The leaner months are upon us, and if I know anyone who needs to snap out of the doldrums, I think that one of those persons is likely, probably, me. Of course, I have sense enough to know that it's not just me. November has well enough stores of melancholy for everyone to share. Wny else would we have, Thanksgiving, Black Friday, beard growing, novel writing, and my brother's birthday all in this s::;.me month? To cheer us up. So grab a commiserate and have at it. Eat! Drink! See your family, go shopping, stop shaving, write nonsense, and send my brother a gift. If you're lucky he'll teach you how to white water canoe when it gets warm again. If you'll pardon the preachy optimism, things get better, or at least we should have faith that they will. Sometimes you just need to reevaluate what you're doing, how you're treating your friends, how you're treating yourself-and keep in mind that the people around you are very likely going through something similar. I'm not completely serious when I suggest that we should give ourselves away to our baser desires to get through November. But I am completely serious when I suggest that you and I should have a hot chocolate by a fire sometime, even if has 1000 calories. I'd like u.1-iat a lot. �\ COMMENT {EDUCATION} Tea with Socrates What have we learned here? by Michael Lacy F riday afternoon I drank tea with some friends . I felt very self-conscious inviting them, and being selfconscious sometimes feels like I'm not being at all. It makes me wonder: is the examined life really worth living? All I do is examine my life, and I hardly feel like I live. This question was a big reason why I invited these friends to tea, and I thought they seemed competent to help me gain some knowledge. Ms. Brann was the first to arrive. We chatted briefly about archeology while the tea steeped. I of course know very little about archeology, but I brought up some famous names and relevant events to show I wasn't entirely ignorant of the subject. She corrected me on the name "Schliemann" with a smile. Talking to her made me a bit jittery. I wasn't sure if I'd made a good impression or not. Epictetus showed up, bringing Socrates along with him. Socrates apparently had been standing outside Pinkney, staring at the flagpole for twenty minutes. When Epictetus found him, Officer Hare was waving his hand before his eye's saying "Hulloo, buddy," over and over. I told Socrates that I'd read about this on wikipedia, and was pretty sure he suffered from Catatonic Schizophrenia, and I could get the names of some prescriptions if he desired. He wasn't very interested. Epictetus snapped at me; he thought getting medication was ridiculous, since Socrates still had his reasoning faculty. "Jesus, I was just trying to help. You don't have to make everything so awkward, Epictetus. I'm just trying to be a good guy." Epictetus gulped a cup of tea bitterly while Socrates introduced himself to Ms. Brann. They sat on my bed beside the window and I sat in a chair away from the glare. I was pretty flustered that my tea party was failing already; I was trying my hardest to make good impressions. "Have you studied to understand what a good, and what a bad man is? and how each becomes such? Why, then, are you not yourself a good man?" "What the hell, Epictetus? Don't be a dick." I looked to Ms. Brann and Socrates to come to my aid, but they looked away wrists. quickly, pretending to be interested in all "I guess that's why I've been writing my books that I haven't read, yet. about liberal education," I murmured, "No good man laments, nor sighs, nor "because I get really anxious about it, groans; no good man turns pale and trem- whether this is how I should be spending bles and says, 'How will he receive me, my time, which stops me from actually enwhat sort of hearing ·will he give me?"' gaging in it. How do I stop being so nervous about it?" "I don't sound like that! Do I?" "Why do you trouble yourself about "In leading us to the roots of our world," things that are not your own? ls it your said Ms. Brann slowly, "and making us see fault if he receives you ill?" what is in our power and what is not, in "Yeah, of course its my fault if I make a giving us the best models and supplying us bad impression." · with a clear notion of their deficiencies, So then Epictetus went into his usual studying the liberal arts gives us convicproof that if Socrates made the mistake of tions-not prejudices or predilections, but not liking me, that was his fault and not convictions, strong, thought supported mine, and that couldn't really hurt me be- opinions which..." she cleared her throat, cause I have no control over that, which I "come close to true knowledge." guess makes sense. He wound it together "One way to think about it," I said, going to the window, watching some of my by saying: "If then, things outside the sphere of peers march fearlessly into McDowell for choice are nether good nor bad, and all their 2: 20s, while others climbed more things within the sphere of choice are in pensively, "is if liberal education gives our power, and can neither be taken away me convictions by understanding things from us, nor given to us, unless we please, more fully, I probably first need to feel what room is there left for anxiety?" convinced about liberal education." "Yeah, I know that, Epi, but I'm still They nodded, not fully agreeing too nervous about all kinds of stuff. I had a quickly. More tea was poured, and the panic attack this summer while trying to mood began to lighten. meditate." "I've learned a lot about this educaMs. Brann asked me if I actually knew tion from writing these articles. I don't how to meditate. "No. I was trying to relax know everything about it, but I've gotby meditating, but I didn't know what I ten a firmer outline, and I do feel more was doing. And the anxiety of not know- confident being part of it. When I read ing what I was doing kept me from being Stringfellow Barr's account in The General relaxed." Magazine," I held up the notepad I used to "Where he has knowledge, there he has copy his quotes from the library, "I really confidence," said Epictetus, massaging his thought I was in the right place. Anxiety might just be a sign that I don't understand something, and that's a place to start learning. When I talk to tutors and friends about books, and am not trying to impress them, but partially know and fully care about the topic at hand, then I'm confident and at peace. But what if I lose my confidence? What then, Socrates? You gonna say anything?" Socrates pointed at my notepad, thick with notes about liberal education, and said: "Let the voice of the charmer be applied daily until you have charmed away the fear." THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 5 �COMMENT going to be punished. "This wouldn't have been so bad if whoever did it had just come to me the day after," says Ms. Waters. "Then we could've A Gumshoe Investigates Troubled Waters worked something out. A deal, see? Now all bets are off." She goes back to her seat. by Paul Morrill I "If they come forward before the 12th, it won't be so rough. Community service riday, 4:00 pm. I walk into the DA' s up, and walks to the window. She pulls and a fine. But after the 12th, they better office. The air is thick with the smell a blind down and looks off into the dis- pray that they're not found out." of cigarette smoke, the blinds drawn tance. "But soon that won't matter." I think back to the residents of Pinkney. so only shafts of light pierce through the "What do you mean, Ms. Waters?" They won't be a happy bunch after that "The administration demands justice," fine. I do some quick arithmetic, work it room. "Sit down, Mr. Morrill," Ms. Waters says with a sultry voice. She's sitting she says as she turns back to me. "You out to be $10.00 a person, maybe more. in a cushy leather chair behind a ma- were there, you saw what had happened. I know I wouldn't want to be the poor hogany desk, staring me down, holding a It was a breakdown of the community! We soul on the receiving end of the wrath half-smoked cigarette. From the ash tray can't let it happen again." of Pinkney. Especially from a certain on her desk, I can see it's not the first. A resident of the 3rd floor, a Mr. Ben "The "What are you going to do?" "If the perpetrator hasn't turned him- Swan" Hutchins. Word on the street is he green chair in front of the desk beckons me. She's trying to get me off my guard, self in by November 12, we're going to killed a man by pulling his head up off his but I can tell she means business. I hang fine the residents of Pinkney for the cost shoulders, like a cartoon or something. my coat up and take off my fedora. "So, of the fire extinguisher, the fire depart- Made his neck as long as a swan's. Nothwhat brings you in today?" ment, and the clean up ." ing was ever pinned to him, but you see "Ms. Waters," I say, "I've heard a rumor "What?" I say, astounded, as I rise to my the glimmer in Hutchins's eye. Getting on about you and that fire extinguisher inves- feet. "That doesn't make sense! They're his bad side is a recipe for a world of pain. tigation." the victims!" "Morrill, get the word out if you can for "You probably have," she says to me. "It's most likely one of them who did any witness to come forward. We need to She takes a long drag off her cigarette, it," she says with a far-away look in her eye. find the guy who did this ." then puts it out. She blows out a steady "And if the perp knows that this fine is "Yes, Ma'am." I tum to leave her office. stream of smoke. ''I've been using my con- coming, maybe he'll come forward instead ''I'll do everything I can to find this guy nections with the rumor mill to try to fish of making his hall-mates pay the fine ." If before it's too late." outthe sorry sap who iced Pinkney." he hasn't come forward by now, I think, I "Oh, and Mr. Morrill?" I pause at the "But I thought the culprit turned him- doubt his sense of justice will make him door handle. "Have a nice day." self in," I say. come forward when innocent people are "Someone did, but... " Ms. Waters turns to me. "They retracted their statement." I'm shocked, but I don't let her see it. I {ATHLETICS} I thought this case was clean-cut and over. I • Officer Hare had found the fire extin- I guisher, and someone had confessed. I'll I What is the Offside Rule? need to remember to find out who it was , I I think to myself, find out who they're pro- I by Eugene Samarin tecting. "Can you even do that?" I ask her. l. . ..·-····· ·· · · · · · · ···· · ·· ·· ···-···· · -··· · ······· · ··· -····· · ·· · · . . "Without witnesses, they can do anything." Ms. Waters is weary of the world ast week the Guardians did the Dru- the International Federation of Associaand all the disorderliness she's had to deal ids a huge favor by producing a draw tion Football (FIFA)- this is the governing with. Kids barely out of grade school usagainst the Green Waves. Unfortu- body of the sport- except for the slide tackle and substitution rules). ing illicit substances, vandals breaking nately, it was not without controversy. Apparently, a certain player shot what windows and furniture. Urinals being Now, before certain people start screamdropped off of roofs . And now this fire would be the "go ahead goal," but it was ing that this is not the correct description extinguisher incident. called back on offside on a player that was of this rule, let me tell them that as I am Suddenly, she slams her hands on the not part of the play. In order to save us writing this, I have the official 2009/ 2010 table. "Dammit, Mr. Morrill, we need to countless hours of arguments of whether FIFA Laws of the Game in front of me as know who did this! Residents can't live it was a fair call or not, we just have to ac- well as the nice FIFA demo of this precariin fear that their hallway could be dusted cept the official ruling on the field. How- ous rule. next!" As we all know, any player that has the ever, with this weekend holding the so"Sounds like you know more than I do. called playoff for the men's soccer league, ball passed to him when he is beyond the I thought you had the perp already serving I would like to refresh everyone's mind last defendant of the opposing team is offtime on a community service chain gang." on what the official rules of the game side. Now, here is where the intricacies "No, no we don't. " Ms. Waters stands state (Yes, we do play by all the rules of of this rule come out. If an attacker in an {REPORT} The Maltese Fire Extinguisher F A Dummies' Guide to Law N°. 11 L 6 THE GADFLY, NOVE M BER 2009 �COLUMNS offside position (not interfering with an opponent) does not touch the ball, then that player cannot be penalized. Also, if another attacker with possession of the ball passes to the offside player, then the offside player is now onside and can play the ball without being penalized because the offside player has crossed the onside line (in this case the line is designated by the ball). In regards to shooting on goal, an offside player cannot be penalized as long as he is not obstructing the goalkeeper's line of vision or making a gesture or movement which deceive or distract the goalkeeper. (I know some will say that the player was distracting the goalkeeper, but to answer you, FIFA has the offside player in direct line of sight of the keeper for it to be considered interference.) If the shot by a team-mate in onside position rebounds from the goalkeeper to player in offside position, then the player is penalized for playing the ball having previously been in an offside position. But, if the offside player does not interfere with play and another attacker touches the ball, there is no offside. As anyone can see, there is a pattern emerging. As long as the offside player does not touch the ball while he is offside, there is no offside call. As for our games, they are officially "in the books." Nothing can be done about it and frankly I like the result. It sucks that it came from a bad call on the referees, but that is life. Deal with it. Just for those running lines this week, knowing these rules vvill save hours of moaning from the sidelines. i {DODD ON THE QUAD} i Apocalypse and Chocolates Now I The Great Books Program and Eschatology [ by Kirstie Dodd A short while ago a freshman asked me a very serious question indeed: "With your perspective as a senior, has the Great Books Program given you any insights about the Mayan Apocalypse that is slated to occur on December 21st, 2012?" Now, I'm not one to be well-versed in conspiracy theories, but I did know that the freshman was referring to the end of the thirteenth baktun cycle of the ancient Mayan long calendar three years hence on the winter solstice (or the Mesoamerican version of the Y2K scare). I immediately revisited the unpleasant memory of when I first learned about this theory. It was four years ago, and I had just finished watching a History Channel show about Nostradamus, Edgar Cayce, and crackpot eschatological theories. "What's wrong? Are you-are you weep. ing?" a friend had asked me, lightly patting my convulsing shoulders. "It's just, I just... I'll only be twenty· three. Twenty-three! I guess Keats was twenty-five when he died ... but still... so much life yet to live... " I searched my friend's face with fearful, bloodshot eyes. "What are you talking about?" "December 21st, 2012." "Shh, shh, there now. That's not real. It's some goofy conspiracy theory made up by bored New Age people. It's going to be okay," he cooed. "No, it's not!" I screamed. "We're all go· ing to die!" I picked up the nearest book-I remember it was a tom paperback copy of The Teachings of the Compassionate Buddha- and flung it at the wall above my friend's head. I spent the next seven minutes and thirty two seconds in complete hysteria, ransacking the contents of the drawers in my room until I found a bag of stale pea· nut M&M's, which I immediately poured down my throat. The conclusion of this scene? Chocolate is magical. It pairs well with all sorts of spices and fruit flavors, melts near body temperature, and coats the palate with a creamy, sugary, dissolving layer of brown aphrodisiac goodness that can improve even the most sour mood with a generous spike in the brain's serotonin lev- els. If I were ever in a situation where I had a "last request meal"-like if I were on Death Row or I was abducted by Chilean pirates and forced to eat one thing before I slowly rotted away in some dank, musty old berth-I would want the entire meal to be chocolate, in a menagerie of .different molded animal shapes filled with nougat or slathered in ganache, and I would eat it all and curl up comatose in a tight little ball and pretend to forget my problems. But let us depart from this scene of panic, which was, strangely enough, produced and placated by Mesoamerican byproducts. The point is, I had nothing to say to the freshman that asked me about 2012 because the Great Books Program has made me woefully unprepared for any sort of apocalyptic experience! Think about it: you are sitting in your living room one quiet afternoon and-bam!-suddenly people are being raptured left and right, there's a tsunami coming through your kitchen window, the whole world is imploding, and the only thought that's worming through your very clever Liberal Artsy head is something about the Myth of Er and maybe "Why didn't we read The Book of Revelation in seminar?" Unable to give an answer, all I could do was refer the freshman to The Phe'nomenology of Spirit. "Oh, it's all in there," I lied. "Hegel pretty much lays it out. You have to read very carefully, though. Once you figure it out, you can get back to me and maybe we'll grab coffee from City Dock and have a chat or something." "Heh, heh. That teaches 'em to ask me questions I can't answer," I thought, turning back to my lab homework. And yet The thought of apocalypse lingers still, crippling me in the middle of the night, following me to class, bubbling up from my Parkhurst Philly cheese steak soup, peering at me from behind stacks of books in the basement of the library. I cannot escape the dread that I will die so young with a mere pittance of a legacy left behind: a dejected pile of Gadfly oeuvres that would no doubt be washed away in the swelling tsunami tide. The only thing I can do now is sit back and wait for the destruction and pay a small fortune at Annapolis Mall movie theaters this Friday to see the new Roland Emmerich film 2012 starring John Cusack and Amanda Peet. You'll find me in the front row biting my nails and, of course, eating chocolate. THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 7 �M I S C {SPREADSHEET} This Year's D.C. Budget Club Name Aikido Art Society Croquet Crossfit Epoch Fencing Film Society Gadfly Gaming Club G. Longsword KWP OCF Reality Rock Room Sailing SCI Senior Prank Shammai Storyteller's Swim Club Theatre Vegan/Veggie Waltz Requested $300.00 $340.00 $1,934.00 $400.00 $1,000.00 $1,587.05 $1,199.61 $1,643.89 $40.00 $300.00 $1,715.00 $700.00 $6,150.00 $825.00 $324.27 $268.85 $2,250.00 $351.68 $75.00 $749.85 $152.40 $247.62 $1,550.00 Advanced $$. $$$$$$$$$600.00 $$2,200.00 $$$$$$$$$$- Write Check For $300.00 $340.00 $1,934.00 $400.00 $1,000.00 $1,587.05 $1,199.61 $1,643.89 $40.00 $300.00 $1,115.00 $700.00 $3,950.00 $825.00 $324.27 $268.85 $2,250.00 $351.68 $75.00 $749.85 $152.40 $247.62 $1,550.00 Total $24,104.22 $2,800.00 $21,304.22 Initial Balance Total Available $1,340.21 $29,273.21 Sem. Funding Total Budget $27,933.00 $24,104.22 {TRANSLATION} Song Sung Backwards Mounted chop-chop on my stallion Foot, I who born for, whose bourne toward, who's borne no more But as thorn but I be In its own foot. I got five gallants a toe But in time I've a : Lets go ! I've a hoop wound round my head, Holds who what where when how and spike, Got a hole in my mouth Bound with spikes. But what what is this ? But who But who takes off to ? ... Lo, comes the Being who flees On the air of not to be. And incisors and incisors, inside 8 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 I've. My head in my mouth's no good, Won't close death's doings, As nothing' s words would As all get out, as any, It's nothing at all in all. But who, But who takes off to? .. . All on the air of not .. . It's h~re, th' air rolled to a dot, To a hot, to annulled, to less than a bulb, It's here the air of what? But what what's this? - not who's never-, But who, But who takes off to ? . .. Lo, comes the Being who flees On the air of not to be. And for another and battery baptized Corps Here's the crank, Etcetera ... - Jean-Pierre Duprey (Translated from the French by Carolyn Zelikow) THE GADFLY 60 College Avenue Annapolis, Maryland 21401 United States of A.rnaica Editor-in-Chief Kirstie Dodd hnior Editor Eli:abeth Spagnolc::rti De.sign Editor J. ~¢1\3.n Trotter Bu.s!ne..(S Managa Marin Skokandic Graphic Artist AfoeTtising DiTector Contriburocs Noah Litvin Phillip Anny John Bloch! Chloe Ginsburg Michad Lacy Paul Morrill BhkeMye-rs EU.gene Samarin Matthew Vidin Carolyn Zdikow F ounded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly dk"tributed ro over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus. Opinions expressed within are the sole rc;ponsibility of the author(s). The Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, informative, and thought-provoking newspaper which circumstances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. TI1e Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. The Gadfly meets e,·ery Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the Barr-Buchanan Center. ----- All articles are due at 11:59 PM every Friday. Errors printed herein are, mostly, unintentional. Usually, typos, misspellings, and general falsehoods are tl1e product of tl1e human oversight, as opposed to malice. {JOCKS 0' THE WEEK} Ms. Fry and Mr. Robertson � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 10 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-11 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 10 of The Gadfly. Published November 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.10 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/527f6e044639279305655fd452fb1aee.pdf 3b664068df7e71daa256558a32f18335 PDF Text Text �{THE ANNALS OF EDUCATION} ~ THE GADFLY 11•17•09 Some Historical Context for Seminar From the Lost Manuscript ofTwineberry Barr by Michael Lacy F ounded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus. Opinions expressed within are the sole responsibility of the author(s). The Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, infom1ative, and thought-provoking newspaper which circumstances at St. John's permit. CONTENTS 2 Some Historical Context for Seminar Michael Lacy 3 l\Xlhat' s Missing? Jerry ]anuszeivski 4 Love and Basketball J.P. Snyder 5 RateMyTutors Keenan Trotter 6 Jordan Gunk Chris Johns 7 Letters Various Authors 8 Writer's Block Kirstie Dodd 9 111e Arts Vlzrious Authors SPOTS Jack Nd!! COVER Noah Litvin, from the 1950 Yearbook MASTHEAD Editor-in-Chief Kirstie "Cra:ie.. Dodd Junior Ediwr Elizabeth "LU" Spagnoletti Design Ed.itar Keenan "T & A" Trotter Business Mana.geJ C'rraphic Artist 2 Marin "Skl.":cze" Skokan.die Noah "PTecious" Litvin THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 T he name Twineberrv Barr has been all but lost to college history. I uncovered the life and work of this man whilst delving into many dusty SJC documents and secret files. The younger half-brother of the much more prominent Barr, Twineberry was a man of diminutive stature (he needed two Middle Liddells to drive a car) and of diminutive mental capacities. His attempts to master the liberal arts were more embarrassing than a sophomore music alto section. For several years he feigned competency in tutorship and general academia. The Anne Arundel Times declared his collection of Sappho translations to be "less readable than the Greek." And then there was the major scandal that was swept beneath McDowell's rug: one evening, whilst preparing for his freshman lab class, he quickly scanned the Pascal reading, got liquored up, and procured a tattoo proclaiming "Nature Abhors a Vacuum" across his protruding forehead. The story goes that Jacob Klein, who had a great affection for the manchild, challenged the tattoo parlor ov.'ller, Trustwallow Greenfield '28, to a duel for enabling such permanent acts of philosophic blasphemy (for a full history of SJC dueling see Kuder, Samuel. Swords & Pens Newark: Green Lion Press, 1958). The damage was done though, and Twineberry could no longer be kept in Polity view. Consensus had it that he would be locked away in the bell tower room until nature took its course and euthanized the poor halfling. With much bemoaning and tearing at breasts (for many had developed deep affections for Twineberry in the way one grows to love a mentally-addled dog), the group of tutors ascended tl1e many steps of McDowell, each bestowing their unique gift to the Man-of-Many-WindEggs. The story goes that the eight year- old Eva Brann (already in her 3rd year of tenure) gave Twineberry her favorite marble. However, it was Klein's gift, a leather-bound Plutarch's Lives collection, that would give Twineberry a purpose during tl1e remainder of stunted life up in the bell tower (besides banging his head against tl1e walls as classes began and ended). Though he was no good at reading the books, Twineberry thought he might give students a bibliographical context for their readings to be distributed free of cost in manual format. Here are excerpts from his as yet unpublished manuscript: Plato: known by most for writing dial.agues that use the ethical philosopher Socrates (who did not actually write anything himself) as a devise to deliver his own philosophy. Plato actuaHy did not unite anything either; he was actuaHy a devise used in the u'Titings of the phi1.osopher Heraclitus. Interpreted in the correct context, the Socratic dial.agues are used to demonstrate the danger of verbose nonsensical ranting, in contrast to the straightforward teachings of Heraclitus. Contrast for example: "AH men desire good" and "On those stepping into rivers the same, other and other waters fl.ow." The former is clearly false; take for example any executive order of our polio possessing pussyfooting pinko president Roosevelt. Betcha don't wanna step in that water, Franklin: didn't work out last time! Aristophanes: misinterpreted as a comedic poet. In actuality he trained under the famous doctor Hippocrates and became one of history's first medical specialists. He used his plays to educate the Athenian public about their bodies, becoming the first and last proctol.ogist/ urologist to publish his findings using extensive dialog. Preceptorial: one of the most prolific authors ever. Though some of his work is at times more popular than others, his book about Ni- �hilism (a sexual attraction to the largest river in Egypt) entitled The Brothers Karamazov is a college staple. The book is probably pro· nounced incorrectly; the K, M and V are silent, while the Os are invisible. Though heated contention over whether Preceptorial's authorship of Finnegan's Wake remains, the general sentiment is it doesn't matter who wrote Finnegan's Wake because it is incomprehensible. This is a silly sentiment; the book is easily understandable uust read every other page twice and every seventh page backwards). Don't tell people this, though. They'll think you're craz:y and lock you away in a tower, but someday the truth will be known about you and they'll study your manual of the Great Books- even if it has to been attributed to someone already famous, like Preceptorial. T wineberry was given a chance to tutor freshman classes once more in the autumn of 1954. Due to a severe misinterpretation of Phaedo in seminar, Tvl'ineberry drank an inordinate amount of hemlock tea in an attempt to become 'invincible.' Officer Hare Sr., reported to The Anne Arundel Times that a week after Barr's death, authorities were still "baffled as to where a man these days can get so much g-d hemlock." {MEMOIR} What's Missing? Transformation Rituals and Intoxication by Jerry Januszewski M y first job as an addiction counselor was at a clinic in a housing project near Baltimore. It was a dangerous place to work because the drug trade was open and the police presence was scarce. It wasn't uncommon to hear gunshots at night. The director of the clinic was just the kind of guy I needed; an experienced, street-wise counselor who was willing to take me, a suburban kid, under his wing. The closest I'd ever been to heroin addiction before then was watching movies about it. He and I would sit by a darkened window and watch drug transactions happening across the street from the clinic. He pointed out the crack cocaine users; they came and went many times through the evening. For the heroin users, one purchase was all they needed before vanishing into the night. This criminal scene, while instructive, was very painful to watch. The drug buyers were subject to numerous humiliations, which I discovered were the inevi- table result of addiction. And I learned that beyond addiction was death- and not very far beyond either. How is one to understand this behavior, when the pursuit of a fading pleasure so predictably brings degradation with it? The substance users desired something, and they desired it more than they dreaded humiliation, more than they feared death. But what was it they desired? What was missing? In natural and human ecology there are curious cyclical connections between death and renewal. Plants and animals die and become part of the soil that produces food for the living. One generation leaves resources for the next. Human transformation is often understood as the old self being mortified in some fashion to allow the new self to emerge. Death precedes rebirth. Transformation rituals, rites of passage, are legitimate and necessary for healthy progress through the stages of life. This is often represented symbolically, as in baptism or graduation ceremonies. In THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 3 �\I authentic rites of passage, paruc1pants are willing to accept humiliation and risk death for passage into a higher way of life with a better self. If our culture fails to provide productive ways for us to find this renewal in a death-and-rebirth cycle, we seek it out ourselves in ways that are som.etim.es m.ore destructive than renewing. Heavy substance use in college is spoken of by som.e as a rite of passage, allegedly aiding the transformation from. youth to adulthood. The idea is that intoxication represents a sort of death, a passage into a transcendent state, from. which the person returns changed in som.e important and useful way. In legitimate rites of passage, the participant goes through the deathexperience in order to receive a gift, after which he or she is reincorporated into society with a new and elevated social status, and v•lith a new contribution to m.ake. The pursuit of intoxication does not accomplish this. It provides the metaphoric death (transcendent separation from. m.y sober self, entering into a substance using culture) without the subsequent returning to society with genuine gifts to offer. The substance user is seeking something ennobling in an ignoble way, destined to fail because the experience of intoxication eventually takes more than it gives. A literal death cam.e to the clinic where I worked. A patient who had been building a seemingly healthy recovery from heroin addiction, a guy who was an example and inspiration to other patients, died of a heroin overdose. I visited his fam.ilywho were still dumbstruck by the news. I sat on the sofa in his mother's living room. try· ing to console his best friend, not knowing what to say. The friend described how well his buddy had been doing, how bright the future seemed, and how incomprehensible was his return to heroin use. Everything seemed to be going so well. In wide-eyed griefhe looked at m.e and asked, "What was missing?" What was missing? A tragic question when asked in the past tense. Of all the questions we ask ourselves at St. John's College, this question, asked in the pres· ent tense, m.ay be one of the m.ost important. If heavy drinking and other drug use in college are supposed to be rites of passage to a better self by providing something that's missing, is the strategy succeeding? What is missing and what is gained? Without honest answers to those questions, authentic passage to our better selves is hindered. {THIS ATHLETIC LIFE} Love and Basketball The Curse of Natural Talent by J.P. Snyder T here are few things I actually regret in life. I try to live by the philosophy that there are no real right or wrong actions, only experiences; it just so happens that some are m.ore pleasurable than others. This has worked out for m.e pretty well so far. By all appearances, I have a great life, and things tend to work out in m.y favor. So when I think back on m.y past and wonder if there is anything I would have done differently, I com.e up with a pretty short list. There are only two things that keep m.e up at night, wondering how things would be today if I had changed one action even ever so slightly: Love and Basketball. (No, I'm. not talking about the movie; I don't regret watching it and even recom.m.end it.) When trying to decipher what it is about these two aspects of m.y life that have caused m.e to question myself, I find quite a few similarities. Both require dedication and com.m.itm.ent in order to sue- 4 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 ceed. Both will wear you out, physically and mentally. You can play both by yourself, but it is more fun with someone else, and in som.e cases multiple people. Both can m.ake you feel ecstatic, like you are floating on air, and then throw you into utter despair the very next m.om.ent. Both have winners and losers. The point is that Lhave often wondered what m.y life would be like had I tried a little harder at both, had I the courage to push myself and be more aggressive. I came into basketball as a late bloomer. I was, believe it or not, short in middle school and was told that I didn't make the junior high team because of my height. I still played regularly outside of school and eventually hit a growth spurt that caused the coaches to pay closer attention to me at the next try out. I m.ade the team and was pretty good. I eventually moved and {CONTINUED ON PAGE SIX} {THE INTERNET} RateMyTutors Contains a matrix. by Keenan Trotter T wo years ago, when I was going to a different college, I, along with thousands of my peers there, was creating my academic schedule for the next semester. A rather large part of this endeavor, in which I chose five classes out of a catalog of several hundred, involved the website RateMyProfessors.com. The website asks students to rate their teachers in terms of "easiness," "helpfulness," and "clarity," like a consumer survey or a book review. Students also have the option of stating whether a particular teacher is physically attractive; enough of those votes garners a teacher's page a "hot tamale" icon. Of particular import are the comments, in which students dissect their professors' teaching habits, tics, grading policies, humor, and other didactic accoutrements. Anonymously. There is nothing scientific about RateMyProfessors, nothing especially fair or reflective, yet it held crucial sway in deciding which classes I would take. (Why, after all, would I wish to take a class taught by a professor who reportedly loses students' papers and then accuses said students of never handing them in?) W e don't really have the option of choosing our tutors. Most of us are stuck, you could put it, with the tutors randomly assigned to us by the registrar, a person m.ost of us do not speak to on a regular basis. Very few other colleges operate this way. So why bother to "rate" your "professors?" That's a good question. A lot of comments on the site are vindictive, petty, and inane. (Still, St. John's appears to depend of student comments for trying out new tutors, so perhaps something about The Internet enables the sorrier side of our consciences to emerge.) The central question of RateMyProfessors is this: are there bad teachers? (Or do filters like the hiring process or the tenure "track" always whittle the bad ones away before they enter a classroom, much less secure a faculty position?) Anyway, what do we have to say? Quite a lot, actually, with varying degrees of intelligence. See for yourself. �DEEP "[H]e is an example of the way St. John's ought to be, meaning that he [...] could actually interact with other human beings in a capable manner." ''A total sophist. Has an agenda that has nothing to do with understanding the books we discuss. He will go so far as trying to deny that the text says something it does say, even when somebody quotes the text directly. He is the reason two tutors are needed in seminar." "I think the world of St. John's would be just a bit colder if [he] weren't there." "He was unwilling to help with paper issues, saying 'I don't know how to write a SJC math paper, so I certainly can't help you learn how to write one.' He certainly knew how to grade them." < E-< [He] managed to leave me with an understanding of why translation matters. "Inscrutable." "She forgets words and gets off subject, but it's the kind of getting off subject that keeps you learning, just about different stuff." "[H)e reminded me of a below average biology teacher that I had in high school that was more interested in being popular with the students than in imparting knowledge." • "A beautifully sarcastic man." '"'O 0 Vl ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~.__~~~~~~~~~~~-----'~~~~~- Cl "I think she acthally believes in the Greek gods." ~ z "She has actually ferreted personal details about students' home and financial problems and brought them into academic discussions. Respected-not sure why." i-3 < trl "Wisdom drips from her lips like honey." "I seriously resent her influence on my education." "Excessively egalitarian. Not especially insightful." ''A total disaster! At times, he doesn't seem to have done the reading. Too often, he is personally insulting in the references he makes to students." "He's enthusiastic, intelligent, and funny. He made class worth attending." "Would never intimidate anyone, but loses no authority as a result. Also, if he doesn't know everything, I've seen no evidence." "Best sarcasm EVER. Ask him to do the face thing." "Sort of helpful, sdrtof standoff-ish." "[H]e's willing to mock really cocky students, which is great!" "Poor professor with a his own 'my way or highway' attitude." "SO great" ASININE THE ABOVE COMMENTS WERE CULLED FROM RATEMYPROFESSORS .COM. ALL ARE .4NONYMOUS. COMMENTS © 2009 R.4TEMYPROFESSORS .COM, LLC. THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 5 �{FROM PAGE FOUR} played for other teams, but never felt like I had reached my full potential. My problem was that I was cursed with natural talent. My calling this a curse may sound strange to a few of you, but it is. It is the truth, and it is the same with any kind of talent. It provides a head start over one's peers and, to a certain respect, a degree of laziness. I never had to work as hard as was needed to really push me to reach my peak. I was content to be a big fish in a little pond. The same is true with many intellectuals. You'll find the ones who work the hardest and go the farthest are not the ones with the most natural inclination to· wards an area, but those who are making up for a deficiency. Maybe you yourself have recognized these people in your classes, the ones who work non-stop to arrive at an understanding that took you minutes to come to. Or, perhaps you are lucky enough to be one of these people. It is those with drive who truly have no regret. The same is true for love. It had always come easy for me, and rarely have I met an obstacle I couldn't easily handle. But I had not developed the skill set of hard work in the same manner as someone who was deficient and could truly appreciate the subject. Thus, I find myself contemplating what I could have done to make it work with a variety of women and if it would have been worth it or if it is even worth it now. Similarly, I find my basketball skill set disintegrating while those around me, most of whom have rarely played, only get better. Where would I be if I had this drive that I see in faces around me? Could I be playing Division I ball somewhere, or would I have burned out and been stuck at a university that had nothing for me? Could I have found true happiness -with some broad or would I have been stuck in a meaningless, unfulfilling relationship? In the end, there is no real point to wishing I had done anything different. I have made the choices I have made (I'll oO 6 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 oO save my free will arguments for some other time) and must live with the consequences. All I can do is take what fear these thoughts have instilled in me and put that energy into bettering myself, into giving as much effort as possible in hopes that these horrific daydreams will be avoided. If anything, I should be working harder towards my goals. Being a senior however, the time is quickly ap· proaching when I actually have to start making them. �L {SPORTS} .P~ 'A't inake the inove fro1n outside sports to inside ones, it is an opportune time to discuss competition. Competition is a part of oc:r life and, as such, must be seen as a part of a greater Vi'hole. The part must also be \vhat the ~1hole strives for. Aristotle says t..1-iat every man strives to do good, ar1d I agree. Since our lives ain1 at the good, competition must also aim at t..1-ie same good. Then, what is t..'ie good in competition? Certainly the good is \Vinning, but what is winning? In answerirnz this:·it may help to think 7:,f what sports i~ often related to} V/a.r. b war, to win is to desrroy the enemy. In sports, this is not the case. If the Intramural Program suddenly ceased to be, it would not be haled as a great victory, but rather as a great loss. Thus, the good in sports is not an e:::id of motion but a contirl_uation of it. The good that is derived from sports is in a continuous action, not single disciete actions. This continuous action is the playing of sports, or competing. The discrete actions don't matter. The amount of times you talk in class, ot the shots vou miss, or passes you complete will not get you any closer to the good of competition. It is in the striving to rn.ake a shot, or to understand a text, or complete a pass. The good of competition lies in the striving to make you, your team, and your class1nates want partake. Just as acting virtuous once doesn't make one a virtuous person, doing any of the above actions once does not give one the good of competition. Rat.1-ier, the good lies in the never-ending motion of these things. -Jake Simon {CONFESSION} I have a HUGE problem. I was told college is going to be the most fun I ·will ever .c T T E R S have in my whole life ever. This is four great years (or more ifl resign to The State School) out of approximately 76.8 years (or fev~rer if I resign to The State School) I now realize that at the end of this semester I will be 12.5% through, and I feel like I haven't even started! I know, I know, I shouldn't have expectations. But having Vlatched '11.nimal House" since I was a breast-feeding bundle of jaundiced flesh and "Road Trip" since pre-pubescence, I came to believe that college \\ 0uld be rnore like controlled them now? Please Help Me, -Lost and f\lot Having Enough Fun in Carr~pbeH 6 7 Editor's Note: The Ga.dfo advises MT. Ca.mpbelI to suck it up, keep showing up to Gadfly meetings, OT get the heU out of Campbel!. P~Lso, ive stiU need an advice columnist! {FROM THE EDITOR'S DESK} Polity! Polity! Polity! chaos than sedation. To illurr.dnate, let me tell you a story my father told me: "Once upon a time, son, in a mythical land called The College of Amherst, there were a bunch of college guys, one of whom owned a hearse. On what would have been a normal weekend night, eleven of them and many gallons of internalized beer entered said hearse and drove around the fair fields surrounding their noble buildings of Higher Education. The police (pohce, not security, good lad) drove by, and those in the hearse all waved to the police officer: eleven fingers shov,-n waving like swords before battle. The next day, the police sent a letter to the school asking the driver (who was easilv found, for his stead was like that of no other), vl'hy he had been dri\ing around their yard with so many others in the back of his vehicle. To this he responded, 'Our friend was hurt, and we had to rush him to the hospital. Sorry.' And so he was released with out penalty. The En,t" Johnnie, this is not even the best of 1--..is stories; it is merely the least illegal. The most fun I have had was when I solved a Euclidean Proposition on my own. Or S&C. .. But die fact that these two compete for the title is pathetic in itself. I want stories for my kids; how do I start living Meet Market is upon us. Tr.e Gadfly is auctioning off a "Gadfly Goodie Bag" which includes: -A pa:-ty with the staff, special Gadfly juice included -A cover of yout design/choice -A "Dodd on the Quad" article devoted to anything you wantd -A special photo shoot with Gadfly photographers (the photos, depending on ho\;.7 photogen.ic you are, just inight en.cl up berwee!l the pages of a future Gadfly!) Get excited. Make sure to save your $$$ up for d1is once-in-a-lifetime oppor. tun1ty;I Thank you, Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted VI.ill be edited for grammar, puncn1atio11., and spelling in most cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circurr1stances. THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 7 �{DODD ON THE QUAD} Writer's Block An article about writer's block Kirstie Dodd T he summer of 2008, The College printed an article called "A Work in Progress," a piece about Johnnies and their search to create art in the lost time between seminar readings and tutorial works. As the author of the article states, "It's no secret that all too often, the rigorous work of the Program eclipses the often extraordinary time and energy it takes to practice and perfect an art formor, God forbid, produce any new material yourself." Ever since reading this, I have pondered my own struggle to balance homework with creative production. I have no problem completing my seminar readings on time because they carry a greater "weight" in my mind and hike up my stress level more. It is the tutorial where my main conflict between art and duty occurs (e.g. "should I spend time tonight v.>riting my own poem or translating Baudelaire's?"). Sometimes I find myself grumbling at the Program for quenching the artistic flame, and nothing quenches it more than a string of frustrating/ annoying/ overly contentious classes. This week, after failing once again to comprehend the nature of wave/particle duality in electrons in senior lab, I found a cold beast set in my limbs and freeze me down to my fingers, that dreaded monster "writer's block." Now, this is no new occurrence for me. In the past, I usually stare at the divided line for an hour, run on the uneven wood track in Iglehart until I get shin splints, drink the bottomless coffee from 49 West until I leave the place with tremors, cry a little, scream into a pillow, and sneeze all over the keyboards owned by The Epoch in our shared office. I usually feel much, much better after these techniques, and I am ready to v.>rite (that is, if I haven't induced a seizure and need to be dragged off to the hospital). To pull a miracle for this article, the sad victim of this particularly corrupted strain of writer's block, I needed to pull out the Big Guns: my friend Samuel T. Coleridge. One of the most famous and harrowing cases of writer's block known to English literature, Coleridge wrote most of his good 'un's by his mid-twenties. 8 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 What do you do when you have writer's block? "Procrastinate." - Larissa McAllister "Throw on your sneakers and sprint around a couple of times in your pajamas." - Aalin Bellinger "I keep writing." - Brendan McGivney "It's changed over the years. Now I drink a glass of wine and look at pictures online of lolcats ...you just have to distract yourself a little bit." - Anne Frazier "I mean, I generally watch videos." -Trey Kennedy "Picture literary characters in their underwear." -Gabe Luzier "Drink heavily." -Ben Hutchins "I don't get writer's block. I'm a constant source of inspiration." - Tyler McCullough "We throw around a koosh ball." - Henley Moore and Maggy Barnes, roommates "Make tea and get into my pajamas." - Thea Chimento In his later years, left high and dry by his muse, he sold out to become a literary critic and then slowly spiraled into a vicious, wretched opium addiction. Thinking of Coleridge reminded me of one of my favorite quotations of his: "Until you understand a writer's ignorance, presume yourself ignorant of his understanding." Writer's ignorance. Writer's ignorance. This got the cogs spinning-why don't I write an article about something I don't understand? I sneezed on an Epoch keyboard for good measure and started brainstonning. This was going to take some systematizing. I ended up splitting "things I don't understand" into three categories: 1. Things I will never be able to understand: the use of Comic Sans font, dark matter, Asian languages, the Mystery of Faith, and of course, the campus enigma himself, Paul Pavlock 2. Things I don't understand but probably could fake an understanding of: large swaths of Schrodinger, my childhood, finger foods, the lyrics to any garbled Bob Dylan song 3. "I write out of desperation." - James Flaim Things I neither understand, want to understand, or am capable of understanding in any philosophical sense of the word "understand": "Force it." - Jacob Greenstine compulsive soap opera followers, nudist colonies, people who don't understand British humor, and- ahem- the understanding. "I leave the state." - Everett Roberts "Wikipedia copy and paste." - Wade Atkins "Go outside and get fresh air. Try to get hyped up. Coffee... intense, like music. Usually that helps." - Tex Pasley "He doesn't do that. He plays croquet until an hour after the deadline." - Laurel Fischer, on Tex Pasley's quotation N one of these, as you can see, would make a viable topic for an article. I sat down and thought "To hell with timidity!" and, like the person who enters Seminar for the first time at 9:52 pm or the person who proudly opens a loud can of soda during the middle of a soft-talker's complicated proof in math class and leans back and says, "Ahhh," I boldly sat down and wrote the article you are currently reading. And to my delight upon discovery, the writer's block was gone. Who'd have thought it? �{ESSAY} On the Importance of Wrongness Justifying Program Anachronisms John Blechl I f our Program offers us any distinct advantage over other methods of education, it is that we are allowed to be wrong. Wrongness is not the end-goal of a liberal arts education, but it is a vital companion in the process of becoming free men. We embrace this oddity in the very heart of everything that we undertake in our four years at our blessed College; everything that we produce has the mark of the entertainment of wrongness and, thereby, the stamp of freedom. We demonstrate our comfort with being \>.rrong when we do not take written tests to display our intellectual grasp of any given material if any other means can be found. T rne, written tests are unavoidable in some cases and we submit to such customs only out of necessity. But we are of a different kind when it comes to the worth of our education; we evaluate ourselves and hold ourselves accountab le for our own education. Can parallels be made to other methods of teaching? Of course. Instead of haunting red ink, we receive an intellectual or rhetorical bashing that strikes just as smartly as any stroke of the pen. We leave certain classes feeling that we did well or poorly and, if any student were pressed to give himself a grade, he would no doubt be able to produce a fair comparison. The process of educating requires progress-reports; such is the nature of the beast. But what are our progress-reports? Are we not given them every time we step out of the classroom? Do we not feel an informal marker, at least on some level, when we discuss these Great Authors with classmates outside of class time? Do we not become impassioned with our own ideas of understanding and offer them forth to test tli.eir possible correcmess? Do we not benchmark our own progress through the Program and what it is trying to teach us? If someone asked "what is tl1e foc al point of your education?" would we not respond that "it is ourselves?" We are kno\\'11 for studying the Great Books, and therefore have a Program, but we quickly realize that our study of these books and authors is for the sake of something else. That something else, my brothers and sisters, is ourselves. We can, and often do, remrn to a prior work only to find that we can gain more out of it than the first reading because we ourselves can pull more from it; that is, we are better equipped to study the texts with each passing day. But the text.s, for all their glory, are limited at least because they are bound by a front and back cover. TI1e depths that we discover in the work.s are really the depths that we discover in ourselves, reflected back at us through the works that we read. Therefore, we do not come into this sacred place of learning thinking that we have nothing to learn. Rather, within the first few weeks of our tenure here we are exposed to the fact that we know very little. We, with a new set of eyes, continue our search for that which is m1e and real-a search that started at birth and will continue until our deaths (if not forever after). We grab onto something, whether it be an experience or a thought, and we investigate it as best we can. Most days we end up in wrongness but we are better for that. We know now what it is not, and we have gained something positive from our failure: we have grown a little. Growth, as the old saying goes, is often very painful and we as students are excellent examples of such an action. This growth stems from actively partaking in the Program. We take a stance-an action that one could never stress the importance of-and we investigate its outcomes. From this investigation we receive a result that is beneficial; whether our stance appears right or wrong yields a result of positive information that is { CON TT NU E D ON PAG E T W ELVE } THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 9 �I ' thearts {FICTION} "N'0 Surv1vors " . l Sarah Pearlman "Forget the countdmvn, it's freaking cold out here!" "Just throv,; it already!~' The taut and shining skin of a ripe hollow pumpkin fiashed ire the lamplight as it feli three stories to the tessellated brick pavement between Spector and Gilliam. The hollow, almost ·'I.vet noise echoed bervleen the tb.ree brick surfaces, accom.panied and quickly followed by a cho:::us of cheers from the gathered dozen or so, including those on the balconies and shouting from windows. The smash was more of a crush, a sort of dull pop, and a circle of orange flesh radiated from an epicenter of stringy mash. The spectators (no pun intended) chatted excitedlv about the cemise of this holidav icon before co1T1menting or: the chill and filing back into th~ir respective dorm rooms to study or watch movies. The pulpy remnants were admired a few moments more by stragglers, but soon enough the dustpan was fetched, and the moment became another story. Pumpkins are a somewhat different case, I thought to myself, running down the stairs in mv bathrobe to nick uv its pieces. Other holiday accessories ar~n't destroyed.' Chri;trnas orr,aments are gently wrapped in tissue paper and boxed into the 10 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 attic, Easter grass and plastic eggs have their place in the cabinet, and 1:he jolly holiday flags are folded and packed away. A pumpkin is chosen on a farm or at the grocery store, selected for the robust and insistent thrust of its orange stripes, the lack of a flat dirty face hidden from display. I had hollowed out the damp orange cave, echoing wi;:h ;:he scrape.: of a spoon edge and tiny score-bought saw. I had carved the silhouette of a cat, or goblin or witch. The tea lights had 1V':inkled through the waxy portals for one night, the squirrels had left tiny teeth marks in it. Now it sails through the chill air, now it is collected in scraps on the brick path. VJ.le don't hurl turkey skeletons or chop up Christmas trees. But in early November, rhe streets are pulpy with the guts of the bygone. I thought of the fate of the unsmashed. The forgotten corpses held together Vvith shriveling strands ::if cellulose, going through wet and dry stages of decay, melting into a fuzz-covered mess with a slimy rank smell radiating from it with each gust of its dying breath. The remnants of other holidays may wilt, the plastic growing brittle or the colors fading. But none rot, none fester, none ooze, none eat themselves in quite the same way. �{POEM} {TRANSLATION} "Glogatha" "Portovenere " Chris Johns Carolyn Zelikow Written in rough imitation of an Orgallian mode (i.e. that of the Serpent Dwellers of Orgallius). Dots were lurking when I saw you, hiding behind a big Black-Blue. Poke-dots perking, as you sat, And shadows working, black and fat. Glogatha! Pretty Glogatha! your face means more to me than the Wiggle Priests of Slorton Harbor, who count all the gulls, with well-rounded skulls, Under the gaze of Queen Gumdrop the Fourth. Or the winking Breeze of the Japanese, Who strangle feral dogs for sport. "I Boink on the edge! Try to stop me if you dare!" Says a Japanese Prince, with Japanese hair. "I Boink on the edge! Makes no difference to me there!" Says a Japanese King, with a Japanese ring. But I, sweet Glogatha, sweet Dork: I'll never drain you just because. I'll wait real gentle, with a fork, and treat you like a fly-trap does. {TRANSLATION} "Martial Epigrams I.27" Adam Maraschky Hesterna tibi nocte dixeramus, Quincunces puto post decem peractos, Cenares hodie, Procille, mecum. tu factam tibi rem statim putasti et non sobria verba subnotasti exemplo nimium periculoso: miso mnamona sumpotan, Procille. Last night I had posed it to you, Having downed more than four-I reckon, If you'd dine today, Procillus, with me. You thought your plans firmly set And noted my not-sober speech With a dangerous lesson of excess: I hate a mindful drinking mate, Procillus. FROM THE LATIN La mer est de nouveau obscure. Tu comprends, c' est la demiere nui. Mais qui vais-je appelant ? Hors l' echo, je ne parle a personne, a personne. Ou s' ecroulent les roes, la mer est noire, et tonne clans sa cloche de pluie. Une chauve-souris cogne aux barreaux de l'air d'un vol comme surpris, tous ces jours sont perdus, dechires par ses ailes noires, la majeste de ces eaux trop fideles me laisse froid, puisque je ne parle toujours ni a toi, ni a rien. Qu'ils sombrent, ces 'beaux jours' ! Je pars, je continue a vieillir, peu m'importe, sur qui s' en va la mer saura claquer la porte. The sea is dark again. You understand, this is the last night. But who am I calling? Echo aside, I don't talk to anyone, to anyone. Where the rocks crumble, the sea is black, and tolls in its bell of rain. A bat beats on the bars of air like a fugitive surprised, all these days are lost, tom by his wings black, the majesty of these too faithful waters leaves me cold, since I never talk not to you, not to anything. May they sink, these 'best days'. I leave, I keep getting old, I don't care, whoever goes the sea knows how to slam the door. FROM THE FRENCH BY PHILIPPE JACOTTET {CONTEST} The Results Jerome Dausman A minor mix.up has led to the delay of this announcement for which many of you have been breathlessly waiting, to wit, the winner of the second irregularly held poetry contest. I am hap· py to announce that Mr. Campbell, a freshman from the "\.vilds of New Hampshire has been awarded top honors. Mr. Campbell has graciously allowed us to reprint his winning entry: Shoozle my noozle Snoop's inspiration Not Enuf grammah To my irritation Such lyrical words read like meditation Let the words come No time fo' hezitatin We encourage Mr. Campbell (and others) to submit more po· etry for publication in this esteemed newspaper. We hope Mr. C will enjoy his $25 worth of delicious fare at Chick & Ruth's (the first prize). THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 11 �{ATHLETES OF THE WEEK} Mr. Mowery & Ms. DeLoy {FROM PAGE EIGHT} closer to Truth. We continue the process in a community-setting to benefit not only ourselves but our peers. Our peers check and counter our well-reasoned causes with better reasoned causes, and we learn and grow. The true poison of a liberal arts education is indifference because it yields no result and therefore no benefit. Indifference is fear of being wrong; that is, to slap the hand that helps. Even if one does not have any established opinion on a particular matter, we should all take stands for everyone's benefit. Additionally, to actively stand in a place that is opposite of a personal belief is both the mark of a real desire for education and a sign of maturity because tolerance, a thing most needed in our world, can only be had by removing oneself from one's own world and placing himself in another's. From a stance-making position we gain a fuller, more complete picture of reality. This is the sign of the value of our education. In other methods of education, wrongness is strongly discouraged. Taking for granted the argument about relative and absolute answers to questions, a student studying in another university is also directly affected by his wrongness. Here we see the great sd1ism in the various methods and ours. A Johnnie takes his wrongness and believes he has gained sometl1ing positive from it; a non-Johnnie believes that his wrongness is a demonstration of his inability to be a good student. A grade-focused program must produce such results. If a non-Johnnie is \Wong enough times, he ·will be denied the very education he hopes will cure his \Vrongness. It is like a doctor turning a way a patient because they are too sick. Such a thought should sicken us, but such a thing actually happens. What of the "correct answers" that non-Johnnies give? True, Columbus did sail the ocean blue in 1492, and Austin is the capital of the great state of Texas, but tl1ese questions are not under examination here. Rather, the questions that are based on interpretation, on theories taken as law, on opinion taken 12 THE GADFLY, NOVEMBER 2009 as fact, are what we, as Johnnies, find bothersome. If one was to take a course where the primary reading material is tl1e professor's own book (a trend happening more and more in universities), the test will be based on that professor's opinions on the given subject, not on the subject itself. "But," we would say to our friends that go to other colleges, "I did not wish to take a class on Professor Such-and-Such, but ratl1er on subject X." NonJohnnies run the frightening risk of forgetting that what they learn from such classes is only opinion and not truth; instead, they re-enter tl1e world believing that because this answer was the "correct answer" on Professor's Such-and-Such's test, it is the actual answer. \Xlhen one believes that one has found tl1e "correct answer" one naturally, unless educated otherwise, ceases to search further. Therefore, when one shuns \Vrongness as a vile thing to be avoided like illness, one ceases to search for the answers (becoming stagnant and harmful to oneself), and one goes through the world professing a belief as fact. Any active mind can see through such mistakes; any true philosopher will be appalled by tl1ose attempts. One could argue against us that our method yields no practicality; a witty non-Johnnie could quote the story of Thales falling down the well. But if one wishes to take a utilitarian view of things, the only possible thing Johnnies lack is experience, not ability. If anything, Johnnies are thinkers and think before they act (hopefully). Our authors are the great innovators and inventers, \vi.th or without needed experience. We cannot say all innovation comes from educated men-we are not that foolish-but we realize that the vast majority of innovation, i.e. practical innovation, was produced by philosophers. Men neither simply act nor simply think; they are always doing both collectively. The great men and women that we read botl1 acted and thought ·with great precision; tl1ey were both practical and speculative about whatever they were investigating. If we are exposed to their example -and what other way can we gain any kind of exposure than by reading their own words and thoughts and then mimicking their actions?-then do we not place ourselves in a prime position to innovate today's world for a better tomorrow? If such a thing is not "practical," then we should ask for a more precise definition. All of this innovation, growth, and education comes first from embracing wrongness. We study Ptolemy knowing that his theory is wrong but finding out that his mathematics is sound; we read Descartes ideas on the conservation of energy knowing tl1at there is such a thing as Newtonian Physics that is the accepted metl1od today in practically every macro-atomic instance of physics. We find that wrongness, as Johnnies see it, can only be found in our exposure to theories; mathematics cannot be wrong-we do not at any point disprove a prior proposition-and our study of language must be taken as is because we understand that the present form of the language (if it exists) does not disprove the language at a prior point in time. Wrongness, tl1en, is our advantage. It is what makes us free men and women because it is in our wrongness that we strive to be closer to Truth and search in ourselves for the answers to life's questions. Wrongness allows us to take a stance and tl1en take the opposite stance, defending each as passionately and reasonably as we are able; v.Tongness expands our concept of reality, builds and calls for tolerance, ushers forth innovation and personal growth (education). If armed with no otl1er reason to defend our Program, would this advantage not be enough to open the eyes of everyone and set them on a better path towards Truth?~ l � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 12 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 11 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-11 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 11 of The Gadfly. Published November 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.11 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/babfaa76696bdfde187d843fa4db515e.pdf 8f32a3e89b4672ef2676b01ccc51c8bf PDF Text Text �L E T T E R S beauty of it! Now that you can't talk about the Jersey Shore with someone (unless contrasting it to The Bacchae), you can finally free your soul to speak only of the mathematical and the beautiful, and let it flow forth like a graceful, winged chariot. Of course the tutor will then take your winged soul, condense it, replenish himself by injecting it like a hot shot into his philosophy gland, and tell you everything that was wrong with it. He does this not for your sake but because he is an addict and wishes to have the purest cut of dialectical dope possible. Let's stop being so selfish, Mr. Trotter. Tutors aren't gods keeping tallies of truthbomb droppings; they're addicts, hopeless addicts, who want to get us hooked on the junk also. Like most people with dependency issues, they claim we're all addicted to something, but tutors claim they've got the best high. I don't know if that's true, but next time I'm having coffee with a tutor, I intend not to be a square, inhale deeply, and see if I get hooked. Stop bein' such a narc, Dawg! - Michael Lacy (see on next page, right, w/ guyliner) TO MR. TROTTER: After I read your lengthy article in the last Gadfly on the topic of taking tutors out to lunch, I was struck with indecision: should I sneak down to Sophrosyne Hall in the dead of night and smother you, or just crash through the glass door of the Gadfly Office and unabashedly kick your ass. It wasn't your whining that angered me-or at least it wasn't only your whining. The fact that you took up an entire spread with your whining really rubbed my fur in the wrong direction. You seem very concerned with making sure tutors like you, but are you unaware they read The Gadfly? Tutors read those bizarre asides formatted with asterisks, which no one else could have submitted except the Gadfly's Design Editor (though I'm sure the South Pacific Monthly does it all the time!); and they know the truth about you, Treenan Kotter! There's only one person you want to take out to lunch, and that's Keenan Trotter. (BTdubs, according to my word processor, "Keenan" is not even a real name.) **I, myself, don't take tutors out that often, but when I do it is usually to coffee. When we 2 THE GADFLY, DECEMBER 2009 go to lunch, I get nervous and inevitably spill brisket on my pants, even if they're serving chicken nuggets.** Taking tutors to lunch is not about making them like you. It's about providing tutors with nutritious dialectic life-blood. Seriously, most tutors struggle with a gripping addiction to oral philosophy. St. John's discussion-based program was actually made to provide for academics with such dependencies. The school is more like the "vampire rave" in the movie Blade than a real college. Tutors physically need those dining hall chats lest they pounce upon community members or family for convoluted conversations on Oedipus Rex. In 1997, the dining hall stopped providing free lunch for tutors and students, and the extracurricular chats between them decreased three fold- while tutor divorce doubled! By not taking your tutors out to lunch, you are destroying lives, Mr. Trot· ter. Do you not see? These thoughts and fears in your head do not exist outside of it! You say you do not know what to talk about with tutors, that you are constrained by the program. That's the Let me start off by saying the obvious: being a person is hard. Really, really, hard. We try to address that by informing our lives using observations about lives of every and anyone we've ever met. Not only are the lives we observe different from our own, but we have considerably less time to understand the former than we do the latter. We can observe over 2,000 different, unique people in our lives, in the space of about 80 years. Eighty. And we do our damnedest to try and understand the small glimpse we get of them. That's insane. The Program enables (excuse the pun) us to do this better. We are confronted with serious, tragic, and great lives, and we take what insight there is to be gleaned from them. Frantically, in our short time in existence, we have to make sense of it all (even if we conclude the world is nonsense). So we dash around, hit our heads together in Seminar, grasping at any handhold, any mere scaffolding to hoist ourselves up toward knowledge with. And- here's my favorite part- it's fun. The next time you're dozing off, daydreaming, or "just being," remember that time is short. We're given four years TO THE POLITY: �Wood is Like Euclid Fighting Heraclitus by Katie Kolodzie H ope fully, most of you saw the production of Twelfth Night that rocked FSK this weekend. And hopefully, a few of you tore your eyes away from the hilarious acting antics to think something like, "Damn, that's a huge platform. It's so beautifully stable. And those spiral stairs are something else. Where on Earth did they come from?" I'll tell you: three kids with one drill and one beautiful Japanese pull saw (KWP has little in the way of tools or budget to buy them) putting in absurd man hours backstage. Domenic Bauer, Andrew Mize and I managed to build that massive thing without anything more advanced than a ruler, a tape measure, a T square and those tools I mentioned. (We did also use the woodshop, but often its times didn't match up with ours.) It was a lot like Euclid. We had to make straight lines of various lengths, join them in the correct manner, and even got up to making squares, rectangles and cubes. I hadn't realized how very much carpentry, especially carpentry based on hand tools, is done in the same way as geometry. All you start with is the tools for making straight lines, and everything else is based on those lines. The circular steps of the staircase were constructed by taking the radiuses that we needed. And those triangular braces? Direct from 1.47. We had to make sure the angles were all correct, and that everything was in the correct 1: 1 ratio. The relations and shapes we drew on paper should have come out making a perfect platform, because we did the geometry. We knew how everything fit together. But this is where Heracleitus came in fightin'. Do you know how hard it is to cut something square out of wood? It's IMPOSSIBLE. Or constructing an absolutely level platform? Can't be done: any number of things get in the way, and you can't hold all of them still. Our saw was great but not perfect. And we, with our shifting, tiring human muscles, couldn't cut all the lines straight, no matter how hard we tried. There's something about humans that makes us incapable of forming an absolutely straight line in anything, whether it's paper, wood, or chalkboard. And the wood itself defies any kind of geometric rigidity. It's alive. It breathes, and it flows. The 2 by 4s that I had measured to be the same length a day ago had warped because they weren't the same. The density, grain and consistency of the wood is different, and as soon as they're exposed to humidity they expand or contract in different ways. Heraclitus, or more accurately, the world's irregularity that he described so well, was having its way with our meticulous construct. Building that platform, struggling to make everything perfectly straight and even, was like witnessing Euclid and Heraclitus duking it out. In a way, Heraclitus won. The platfonn wasn't quite square: not all of its legs rested on the ground, and we had to scrap some numbers and just cut wood to the length that was required. Surprisingly, though, this wasn't the end of our construction. We live in this system of not-quite-perfection, and though we often find it frustrating, I'm convinced that most of us wouldn't want to live in a world where Heraclitus couldn't thumb his nose at Euclid's perfect triangles. By being careful, we can work around perfection. The stairs and the platform were more than steady enough for all the running and rolling that happened on them. Showers and Fear by Blake Myers I used to equate contact with water with being clean. Not too far off the mark. But hey, I was six, or nine, or eleven; and we often miss things that are too close to us, like where the thing in our hand is, THE GADFLY , DECEMBER 2009 3 �what we are doing when struck by some violent emotion, and the way we smell sometimes. "I just walked in from the rain." "The rain is water." "I must be clean." But no, no you are not. You smell worse, your wet mop like a wet dog. One looks at their hands after a passionate, evil deed: "What have I done?" The look accuses the hands, the lips accuse the I. I might excuse myself for the execution on the basis that my mind was on lunch and had no opportunity to veto or approve the measure before it was enacted. But we do not trust the mind at this juncture, no. It has its standing orders of habit; it signs documents with out reading them sometimes. And when passion has a gun ... the hands were only following orders. When we look at them we look at our tools, and ask how we let them make ugly when we only tried to make pretty, or better, or what not. Apparently more men than women are afraid of heights. If men are anything like I am, I know why. There is a sense up there that I just may be rash and stupid enough to jump, for no real reason- accidentally. About halfway down comes the realization, and then it is too late. We remember times in which we did similar things. So we think about this before hand, and it keeps us away from ledges. But maybe we should jump off some small ones sometimes. Things become too routine too quickly. Though routine has its benefits, it's boring, and it seems to take with it a great deal of life. Bathing comes to mind. When I was terribly young, it happened in a sink; but that's before I was really aware of anything. All of the sudden, I'm in a bathtub (with one or two brothers for the sake of efficiency). This bathtub is in my parent's house, my aunt's house, or my grandmothers, but it only has Jacuzzi jets at my parent's. There are cups with which we observe fluid dynamics, bubbles for beards, and boats for reenacting fictitious naval battles. Then, I'm alone. The tub is smaller. . My knees bend, and everything is a lot less fun. But I'm comfortable. The water is warm and still and predictable. The bubbles are still here sometimes, and I can think about things. Maybe I'll read a book? I was terrified of showers. There was always something menacing about them. The fluctuating temperatures coupled with my mystic understanding of how the mechanism actually worked led me to believe that at any moment hot lava could possibly spit out of the nozzle at an unmerciful rate directly onto my all but unprotected naked body while I was trapped in a glass box. I got over that eventually, but the post magma-phobic showers are significantly less memorable. But that seems to be an attribute of memory. Even concerning the lava shower period of my life, all a can recall is that I was afraid and that I was afraid on multiple occasions. Showers take up a portion of almost every day of my life- five to ten minutes per. And yet all of those five to ten summed up only equal about five to ten. They almost all condense into a single event. This seems to me to shorten life considerably. It accounts for that strange acceleration. Same as it ever was. {LISTI CLE} JP S ER: TEN REASONS BEING A REFEREE IS ANAWESOME JOB 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. You are never right. You are always right, even if you know you weren't. There is a surprising amount of running required. People expect you to pay attention to what is going on in the game. You have jackasses, like Paul Thompson, who yell at you all the time. Players, who don't understand the game, don't understand why what they did was >vrong. 7. When refereeing women, one is often reminded of Baudelaire's' poem "The Albatross." 8. No one ever cheers for you, except for Dan Connelly but that comes ·with its own problems. 9. The pay is never enough. 10. Leo Pickens always gets the best ref positions. 4 THE GADFLY, DECEMBER 2009 Free Throws Are Not Free by Blee Barks (pseud.) I s there anyone in America who has escaped the childhood heartache of inadvertently killing a pet goldfish? Whether by over-feeding, failure to change the water, or general neglect, we've all experienced that shocking moment of discovery, seeing our new charge gone belly up . I don't blame the child-self. Our society has condoned the cavalier treatment of goldfish for decades, relegating this beautiful but defenseless creature to the same low status as ersatz life forms such as sea monkeys, clay pigeons and dick cheneys. The goldfish, too easily obtained at no real cost to the child, is undervalued as a living thing. And so its inevitable demise, while grotesque and momentarily jarring, produces no lasting human behavior change. The deceased is forgotten the moment it descends to its swirly grave; flushed from our presence and conscience simultaneously. Sim ilarly, such is the status of the humble free throw in the glorious game of basketball. The typical player, lacking the patience to practice the free throw, gives perfunctory attention to the shot, hoisting two or three (on a good day, maybe ten) before moving on to the more seductive 3-point shot or the flashy cross-over dribble. The free throw, undervalued, too easily obtained, is allowed to flounder in its unchanged bowl of stagnant water until the jarring moment arrives in a game. All eyes are on the player as he stands at the free throw line of truth. Mr. Pickens, \.Vith his sad, imploring eyes, hands over the ball. Suddenly the player is in an altered state of consciousness. Sharp but ephemeral pangs of regret about practice neglect shiver down the spine. A desire to avoid peer ridicule arises in the loins, quickly followed by actual ridicule once the shot has gone belly up . And yet it is the universality of the experience, the commonplaceness of the missed free throw that allows the human psyche to passively accept the damage caused: the games unwon, the challenges unmet, the girls unimpressed, with no change in practice behavior. Dead goldfish and missed free throws; as irrationally tolerated as the hangover. This phenomenon was on display in all its woefulness during the Holiday Tour- �nament when the Hustlers contested the reigning champion Spartans. The details hardly matter; how many ways can you describe a goldfish doing a back float? The normally brave and determined Hustler strongman tasted the little death of free throw inaccuracyWhen it was over the Spartans were the victors and the fallen Hustler warriors were left to ponder the mortality they share with the goldfish as they slipped mournfully and showerlessl into the dark December night. Ask Anyone {LISTI CLE} JPS ER: TEN REASONS BEING A REFEREE IS A TERRIBLE JOB 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. You are always right. You are always right. You get to have a whistle. You get to hand out technicals and yellow cards like candy. Some people actually appreciate the hard work you put into the game. You can make up rules because a lot of the players don't understand the game. You get to referee women. Refereeing requires paying close attention ... \Xlhen someone cheers for you, even if it is Dan Connelly, it is effing sweet. You get paid for something you'd probably watch anyV\'ays. You get to work with Leo Pickens. by Carolyn Zelikow market, they do not develop ontologies, but pleas. One may mitigate this vulnerable position by becoming a buyer or by Dear Expert, Why is it guys like Being, and girls talk refusing to participate. And perhaps that's about nothing? (An actual question.) ontology for some awkward young men, - Achety Swan just like Pink Floyd and televized sports. Boring people of both genders have their grottos of insipid self-conLittle Bird, gratulation. Vittoria, the white devil Shall I expound whore to you? sure, I shall; of the title, develops a more I'll give their perfect character. They are worse, Worse than dead bodies which are begged at gallows, sophisticated defense system: she lies and lies. In a And wrought upon by surgeons, to teach man nest of deep deceivers, she Wherein he is imperfect. is the most impenetrable. Even the damndest of her I've omitted the maybe fifty lines of countrymen have a few unguarded lines; this characterization, drawn from John Vittoria has none. She's aware of her Webster's The White Devil. Cardinal Mon- hardness, this perfect extemality. Here ticelso, later Pope Sixtus V, is prosecut- she phrases it, in response to the prosecuing Vittoria Corombona for murder and tion above: adultery. She is guilty on both counts, though For know, that all your strict-combined heads, probably not in today's Which strike against this mine of diamonds, courts. The image above Shall prove but glass hammers, - they shall break. has woman as a corpse, Know this and let it somewhat raise your spite, executed, auctioned, Through darkness diamonds spread their richest light. dissected by men, all in public, for man's edification. This sort of objectification (and vilIn this most justly famous trial scene, lification, of course) commands the Car- Vittoria defends not her innocence- a dinal's other prosecutorial images, as well. less than worthless quality in Webster's A body \Vithout inner life does not world- but her nobility. She won't crack, have philosophy. The whore is split open won't "call up one poor tear to fawn on and scrutinized for the ravages of vice. your injustice." Instead of revealing anyWhatever 'character' the surgeon discov- thing about herself, she induces her at· ers, does not know itself. Prodigality does tackers to splay their own viciousness. not only descend on frisky ladies, how- She insists her charges be made plain and ever. As Pandarus remarks at the close of public: no Latin, no legalese, no vague Shakespeare's Troilus and Cressida, we are slurs. \Xlhat's a whore? she demands. By all "brethren and sisters of the hold-door wrenching clarity from her persecutors, trade"- all whores and pimps, friends, sell- they reveal their criminality. As Vittoria ing appearances for a gasp of life. observes, "For your names of whore and As long as people are just bodies on the murdress, they proceed from you, as if a man should spit against the wind; the spit returns in's face." The point I'm getting at here, Little Bird, is not limited to the baldly rapacious world of this play. The girls I know who seriously study metaphysics are better than the guys, and more numerous. This despite the fact that they indulge every sort of nauseating self-absorbtion from their boyfriends/ spouses. Women have more vital concerns than ontology, even in this gentle age, and slimmer means to achieve prosperity. A woman's tongue's not free, but busy wooing and avenging. From the same scene, Vittoria: "O woman's poor revenge, which dwells but in the tongue!" THE GADFLY, DECEMBER 2009 5 �{INTERVIEW} in New York so that I could get connec· tions with people in the business. Then, St. John's sent me a copy of the Meno, and I read it, and I liked it. So, after a week of New York auditions I came and prospied here. Not only were the classes amazing, and the campus amazing, but it him because then she'd have to fess up to was really nice to be in a community of really being a girl. So, I guess the moral people who really cared about learning, of the story is, if you ever wanna really be and not competitively. I went to an arts in love, you shouldn't lie to yourself or high school, so I had never really encounothers. You shouldn't invent a person to tered a place where people valued academ· be in love with, you should just sit tight ics like I valued academics. Prospy-ing felt and wait for someone to come along. As like I found something I had forgotten for your logic and love question, yeah, I about for a really long time, and that I rethink it's weird. I think it's really weird. ally cared about. Still, giving up on an actIt leads me to wonder that, if love is this ing education was incredibly difficult. It controllable, why do we need a play about was a little bit like abandoning a limb. St. it? Doesn't it seem like the whole thing John's is an amazing place, but it doesn't could be resolved by all of the characters exactly foster artistic expression. Having just saying to themselves, "Yeah, but this seminar so late prevents students from belove thing is just stupid anyway." But, if ing involved in theatre outside of school that were true, we'd never reach the end- and theatre in school is great because it ing. Shakespearean comedy's wouldn't ex- gives the students a lot of freedom, but it's ist because nobody would get married in also a tiny community, so not only does the end and the sense of incompleteness not everyone get in, but when you do, you you would feel at this alternate ending, I work with similar people and do similar think, is a human quality, too. I think things nearly every time, which doesn't althat there's something in us that wants to low for a ton of growth. see people both feel and reciprocate love. So while you're right, in that you can logic Whenever I go to a performance (especially a yourself out of love, if you do, you might Shakespeare one) I get the feeling I'm listening to another language. It's not incoherent, never reach a satisfying ending. Tessa Nelson, Director of Twel'fth Night What's at stake on stage? Questions by Keenan Trotter I saw Tessa Nelson spreading apple butter on a bagel in the dining hall, so I asked her if I could email her a few questions and pretend it was an extemporaneous interview. She agreed. I confess I don't really understand theater-how do you begin to appreciate it? Maybe just going to see a lot of it. I've always seen a lot of shows. I remember seeing The Frog Prince when I was really, really young and almost dying of hysterical laughter. Because of that, because I en· joyed that show so much, I went to more and more and eventually I saw a show that really moved me, touched my soul and stuff. A lot of people don't like theatre because it has a tendency of being a night of sitting in a dark room watching people make faces or woodenly deliver lines, but if you watch enough, you might be lucky enough to see something good, and when you see something good, it's like seeing the things you love to read coming to life. Several times in my life I've managed to reason myself out of love, either because it was necessary for my happiness or because it, the love, felt pointless and futile. What does Twelfth Night say about love that you find important or meaningful? Further, is it weird that humans can logic themselves out of love? In Twelfth Night the lovers are in love with a lie and the liars are in love, which is why nothing works out for such a long time. The Duke Orsino creates this really complex image of what his love should be, and he calls that thing the Lady Olivia, even though she isn't, even though she really doesn't love him and it seems like reciprocation should be an integral part of any kind of true love. Similarly with Olivia, she's in love with Cesario (who, for those of you who didn't see the play {ya jerks} is actually a girl in disguise) who could never return that love, which leads Olivia to tell Cesario "I would you were as I would have you be" to which Cesario responds "Would it be better, Madam, than I am?." Viola, on the other hand, is truly in love with Orsino, but she can never, ever tell 6 THE GADFLY, DECEMBER 2009 Somewhere I read that theater is the best way people can confront each other about what being a human being. Do you agree with that? What about, say, fiction? I think that both have their benefits. I think fiction might appeal to the more rational part of us, in that you can hear peoples thoughts, and understand them in that way. When you see a play, though, you see people sweating and crying and I think it appeals to your emotional sensibilities. I think there's cross-over, of course. you can feel for fictional charac· ters and think through why a character is doing something on stage, but I think it's more common to feel cathartic after watching a play than reading a novel. You got into, and were going to attend, luilliard, fo New York, but you came here instead. Why here and not there? Was it an easy choice? It was not. I finished, like, a million college credits in high school so that I wouldn't have to take any "real" classes when I went to conservatory. I also decided to only audition for conservatories but everyone seems to be yelling, using weird cadences, etc. And, pretty soon, I'm thinking about something else on my mind. How do you even begin to crack open theater? What's at stake? The easiest answer to this question is that you've never seen Shakespeare done well. In a perfect universe, listening to Shake· speare would be like listening to normal speaking, only prettier. This, however, is almost never the case. Shakespeare is hard to access. I, still, at the bitter end of this production, have no idea what is being said sometimes. To fix this, I am a firm believer in "Suiting the action to the word, and the word to the action" which is Hamlet's advice to the players. If you suit the action to the word and the word to the action, you not only make yourself understand what you're saying better, but it illustrates this knowledge to the audi· ence. I think that there's a lot at stake in this. If your audience doesn't listen to what you're saying, the play loses all ef· ficacy. If you gesture too wildly, the audience doesn't believe you, and the play loses all efficacy. Thus, acting is an art, and a tough one at that. �that some newspapers use. Exhibit C: The great "Newspaper or Magazine?" debate of October '09, in which the (megalomaniacal) design editor A Year in Review took (unilateral) action to streamline the by Kirstie Dodd rag and create a series of what he called "collectible covers." The wax wings (somehe article I was fixin' to print this most volatile substances known to man in what) melted when said design editor realweek was rejected in a random a frightening cocktail: one part Johnnie, ized there isn't enough money nor writing sample survey because it "reeked of one part journalism, served over ice. It caliber to turn the paper into The New suburban class guilt," was "utterly repuls- might have been the overbearing fluores- Yorker. Sometimes I suspect he's still trying," and "made the ... [author] ... appear to cence of the Gadfly office or lack of win- ing, the churl. be either an embittered animal-hater (if dows that generated all of this semester's Exhibit D: That time we all thought we are to take [her story] about the Hare drama, or it might have been the pressure our business/distribution manager was a Krishna she met in D.C. as fact) or a de- of working under a rigid deadline. I also werewolf. lusional, narcissistic sociopath, we cannot have been told the "strong opinions and Exhibit E: The ongoing bitter struggle decide which." An anonymous test sub- fragile nature of the staffs mental and with the Epoch staff. They take rude picject said "[anyone] who reads this tripe... emotional resilience" contributed to a tures on our computer and leave them on will want a restraining order against the large part of our snafus. the screen's background, and we use their author immediately." This, of course, was But what could possibly be dramatic printer ink and eat their food. It's been a quite a blow. I had tended and nurtured about working on a newspaper with the pleasant armistice for a while now, but I'm the piece long enough to consider it my same distribution numbers as my mom's still keeping open the possibility of a duel Symphony No. 9, the crown jewel of my annual Christmas update letter, you ask? in the mists of dawn on front campus if column's collection, the perfection of Exhibit A: The typical Gadfly meeting is Zach F. Biggy tries to pull a fast one. mashing minutia and myself with weak 5% a discussion of content for the upcomDespite the turbulent ride, we still maning issue, 20% kicking around outlandish age to scrape out an issue every week. MiProgram references. Not one to not pander, I immediately ideas (I'm still pissed The Gadfly "coozie raculous, methinks. All I can say about pulled the article and replaced it with a fundraiser" idea got shot down), and 75% this is: Santa bless group hugs! If you want less grotesque, less racy fallback piece- a prying into personal details of each oth- to get in on this hugging action or work kind of pre-holiday "State of the Union" er's lives. for The Gadfly in any capacity, send an article about the progression of The Gadfly Exhibit B: What we now refer to as email to gadfly@sjca.edu with a full length this semester. "The Spector Incident," codename "Lol- picture of you in a bathing suit, or simply Let's start with a brief trip down mem- lipop Lane." I won't get into the details, show up at 7 p.m. Friday evenings in the ory lane. On April 1st, 2009, The Gad- but the staff spent a few weeks ironing out lower level of the BBC if you can detect a fly, following the likes of Willy Wonka's some rather uncomfortable wrinkles. We joke/shameless advertising plug. Chocolate Factory, officially closed its learned some lessons about libel and not Now, time to get my winter break seddoors to the world ... forever. But this for- biting the hand that feeds and this crazy entary on ... ever would not be the forever we usually journalism practice called "fact checking" think of when we hear the word forever. campus. This year 145 students and 11 Just as Willy Wonka sent out five golden {FROM PAGE TWO} tickets to teach a moralistic, cloying lesfaculty and staff members participated, son about trust and find the love he was skipping 295 meals and donating $747 in cash, in addition to the meal plan money. missing in his life (God knows the oompa to introduce ourselves to a fraction of The number of meals skipped is down loompas weren't providing much!), so what it is to be a person. Embrace, don't about 23% from last year, which is n ot The Gadfly sent out five golden-okay, the waste, it. surprising: we are not exempt from the analogy between Willy Wonka and The -Logan Dwyer, in response to Mr. hard times that have affected the rest of Gadfly kind of broke down after the first Simon's article in Issue 12 the world. Still, we can be proud that so sentence of this paragraph, but you get large a proportion of our student populathe idea. Slugworth and Wonka shared a TO THE POLITY: We would like to tion participated, compared to the many private laugh. The Gadfly revived. take this opportunity to wholeheartother colleges and universities at which The first meeting was packed with edly endorse the views expressed by Mr. Oxfam fasts are held. Exact figures are people. The second meeting was less Torrey in his sublime and magnificent not yet available, but the total sum raised packed, but still had enough density to be piece. Further information on the views for Oxfam America will be well in excess described as "well-attended." At the third expressed can be found in the source text of $1000. Special thanks should go to meeting, there were five or six people, and on the s~bject, Starship Troopers. Bronte Jones, Carole Clark, and the staff I'm pretty sure two of them didn't even - Johnnie Rico at the Treasurer's Office; to Roosevelt go to St. John's. But no matter! We had a Langley and the staff at Parkhurst; to the staff, and we were ready to get the presses TO THE POLITY: I want to thank everyPrint Shop; and to Thea Chimento and rolling. one who participated in the Oxfam Fast John Welsh, who volunteered their time. I'm sure it all sounds like a perfect, for a World Harvest this past month. pastel little fairy tale right now. But lest This is the nineteenth consecutive year -Jonathan Tuck we forget, we have just mixed two of the the fast has been held at the Annapolis {DODD ON THE QUAD} Keeping Up with The Gadfl.y T THE GADFLY, DECEMBER 2009 7 �F THE GADFLY 60 College Avenue Annapolis, Maryland 21401 Un.iced Stal:es of ~America Editor-in-Chief Kirstie Dodd l•miar Editor Elllabeth Spagnol<tti D~sign Editor J. Keenan Trotti:-r Bi.isiness Manager Marin Skokan.die Gmphic Artist Noah Lit\.'in C.ontrihurors Blee Barks Logan Dwyer Katie Kolod>ie Michadl.acy Blake~frers JPSnyd.;,, Jonathan Tuck Carolyn Zelikow ounded in 1980, TI1e Gadfly is the o'tlldent weekly diotributed to over 600 students, fac· ulty, and staff of the Annapolis campus. Opin· ions expressed within are the sole responsibility of the author(s). TI1e Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the moo"t professional, infonnative, and thought-provoking newspaper which circum.>"tances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted will be edited for grammar, punctua· tion, and spelling in most cases. TI1e Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. TI1e Gadfly meets e\"ery Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the Barr-Buchanan Center. All arricles are due at 11:59 PM every Friday. Errors printed herein are, mostly, uninten· tional. Usually, typos, misspellings, and general falsehoods are the product of the human m·er· sight, as opposed to malice. 8 THE GADFLY, DECEMBER 2009 {JOCKS o' THE WEEK} Ms. Dirkse, Ms. Moran & Mr. Schintzius Great job, guys. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 12 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-12 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 12 of The Gadfly. Published December 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.12 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/ae920efce6f4315c78631db7b40d0c78.pdf d6890e7f9317c1d3264502e5cf27e1fe PDF Text Text publication! I mean, really, who is Jerome Dausman! Furthermore, before things get completely out of hand, please do something one way or the other with those over-sized I's and J's adorning the columns ofMesdemoiselies Dodd and Gold. If these monstrous graphemes don't actually replace the sensibly-sized first letter of their corresponding articles, at least illuminate them so the reader isn't so violently confronted with colossal characters Sans Serif. Add leaves and stuff. PAVLOS PAPADOPOULOS CL<\SS OF 2018 In GADFLY #15 I was excited to read in the December 28th edition of The Capital that St John's would be receiving a $1. 7 million grant from the Hodson Trust, but I was shortly disappointed to learn that $1.2 million of that money, "will go toward constructing an administrative office building." Certainly staff and faculty office conditions on campus are cramped, but if the administration doesn't stabilize n1ition, it will easily be able to expand offices into what will become deserted donnitories. The Program will continue to attract applicants, but fewer and fewer will choose to shoulder the heavy financial burden placed on the many Johnnies who, even with some amount of financial assistance, will graduate from St John's over $50,000 in debt in a poor job market where a graduate degree (and the accompanying further debt) is becorn.ing a necessity. Unless the Hodson Trust specifically required the money to go towards construction, the polity should call upon the administration to rethink their decision to build a new building, make their priorities clear, and put the money where it needs to go: scholarships and tuition stabilization. RACHEL BARTGIS, CLASS OF 2009 STIJDENT LOAN P AYMENTS: $671.05/MONTH the Theatetus, Socrates is referred to as "'atorcwtm:oc;" which loosely translated means, "out of potatoes." This peculiar Ancient Greek expression is derived from a children's game in which potatoes were thrown at a hole in the ground. Whoever "harped," or"· agrcay~," the most potatoes in the hole would get to take all the other players' potatoes. "acpgo6Lm~68Qoc; , " as it was called, is the origin of the modern game of marbles, which coincidentally furnishes the similar expression of "losing one's marbles." PAUL MORRILL I am a female. My looks are fairly average. I had hoped, upon arrival at St. John's, that I would meet a new breed of man, one that was intelligent enough to have respect for me as a person, rather than as a desirable acquisition. Clearly, I was mistaken. My apologies to you all. A JOHNNIE The committee has considered your proposal of January 19th that direction: the most recent Gadfly [excluding the Johnsfly] included the class year, faculty status, or professional title of the each correspondent published in The Mailbox. Perhaps it's a bit too much to ask for this next issue, but could we hope to see such fonnality extended throughout the you are 'deeper than [we] think [you] to be.' After a careful consideration of the arguments contained in your letter, and the evidence of your personal character as displayed therein, we find ourselves unconvinced. All the best, THE FAIRER SEX Imagine my disappointment when I picked up your last issue only to be confronted with articles reminiscent of that disgusting rag knovm as Cosmopolitan. As The Gadfly is a publication issued for the enjoyment of an entire college community, perhaps more care should be taken to publish articles that tutors, faculty, and students are all likely to enjoy reading. And let's not forget that what happens in the bedroom should stay there. MURA MACKEY CLASS OF 2011 We are sorry The Gadfly did not suit your particular needs last week. It's not really up to us to make sure all of the submissions are P.C.; the Polity gives what the Polity gives. Maybe you should spend more time encouraging your peers to send in the kind of witty, informative, uplifting articles you would like instead of v.'riting letters to us about something we cannot have much control over. We would rather have an 8 page Gadfly with "racy" material than a 2 page Gadfly that exposes that our polity has nothing to talk about- which, of course, would be a horrendous lie. That being said, we want you to know we are making conscientious efforts to address your concern. Though we are sad we had to pull the 4 page spread of Heidi Montag plastic surgery photos, we will try to fill it with something that titillates and informs you. Yours for provoking disappointed emails , THE GADFLY �THE WRITER'S RESPONSIBILITY BY EMILY SEBELL, CLASS OF 2012 I work in the bookstore and frequently come across books I find harmful. I don't think that many contemporary writers put much thought into the messages that they are sending to the public. Due to this I think that writer s have a great responsibility for what they are getting published. I am not trying to exempt the reader from thinking about what they're reading, but simply putting words on a page does not make you a writer. Barnes & Nobles is cluttered with selfhelp books, autobiographies, and the Twilight series. How can one self-help book written by a PhD no-namer be better than reading Nichomachean Ethics and thinking for yourself? Reasoning through problems for yourself is more likely to produce a habit change because the process is internalized. Solutions cannot be procured from a howto. How can people be expected to think for themselves when solutions are ostensibly handed to them? The only thing more senseless than the aforesaid example is a book that feigns thought under the name of the Great Books. I came across a book called Beowulf On The Beach: What To Love and What To Skip in Lit· erature's 50 Greatest Hits. This book condenses many of the books on our program into three pages or less. Each book is divided into six parts under the headings The Buzz, What People Don't Know (But Should), Best Line, What's Sexy, Quirky Facts, and my personal favorite: What To Skip. The author states that his book is the best alternative to reading the original text. The preface says everyone can read the Great Books and more importantly, "as long as the so-called great books stay locked in the ivory tower, people don't see how gripping and meaningful they can be, and their kaleidoscopic glories get squandered." I have two questions. One: Isn't it a contradiction to wish to share the Great Books with the masses but only offering the diluted and censored versions? Doesn't this imply that the "so-called great books" are not for the masses? Two: The author asserts that he wants to share the Great Books with us, but instead provides only his interpretations. Thus he 2 THE GADflY , JAN UARY 2010 seems to think that he transcends the great books and the great thoughts of the past. Why read Homer, Plato, Kant, etc. if we have his interpretations? Please don't misunderstand me, I am not saying that all contemporary authors are bad. All I am saying is the books that we've dedicated our education to are put on the back burner, and therefore, the minds of the readers are led astray. MOTIVATION BY JOHN BLECHL, CLASS OF 2010 The problem with self-motivation is that you have no control over it. It either comes or it does not. Usually, we are motivated by external factors, and even then I hardly would call their force upon us "motivation," but rather "compelling" or "commanding" in which we must eventually submit or suffer its consequences. My friends, many of us are experiencing this phenomenon in a very pointed way. While it would be easy to focus mainly and primarily on a common and currently fashionable thread in our blessed School, I would rather like to take this opportunity to include all those who have been excluded from the batting eyelids of deceptive leisure. Where do we draw our lines in the sand? Will it be here, or over there somewhere? What is compulsion, what is habit, what is motivation, what is avoidance? Must we get out of bed or do we choose to do so? Is this even the correct question to ask? Our Program, my dear friends, is compulsory only after we voluntarily choose it; there are requirements and restrictions, but within these boundaries and limits we are free to move about and create as we please. Each reading, each class, each paper, each discussion is a waltz between two things that cannot stand one another and yet rely on each other; that is, all that we do here, even our leisurely activities, are both of our doing and the doings of others. We relax because we have to, we work because we want to; often we get to choose between which duty we will fulfill first. Sometimes, we do not get this luxury. If we take a moment and attempt to hear the inner-workings of our own engines, we will find that even in our peaceful moment we are hard at work. Looking beyond our little machines, we find that our fuel is overly abundant and varied, though always affective. The liquor we believe we have ingested to digest is simply another morsel for the grinding of our gears. We are suddenly right where we belong, for suddenly we belong right where we are. Take heart, my brothers and sisters, my Tutors and friends. The mountain in the distance has always been there, and in some way you have always known it to be there; do not cower now that you actually get to marvel at its summit and taste the sweet ilnmortality of mastery. Regardless if you believe in Destiny or not, you cannot deny the fact that there is now a "you" and a "mountain," a "path" that leads you up and over it, and a "better place on the other side." Stop worrying about the weight and height of a foe that you have known you have had to face (voluntarily, I might remind you) and just find your own path over the slippery ledges. Does this make you a hero? No. Does this make you special? No. Does this make you human? Yes. Collect yourself and find your truest million-dollar smile; you are exactly where you should be and you will end exactly where you will end. Enjoy the . ide, but take the r ride! That mountain, that struggle, that victory, it all awaits! Have my words motivated you, pushed you in a direction that you were already facing? What do you need me for? Is it not time to take your stance, to put forth yourself as best you can, and see what happens? I have complete faith in you. Do you have faith in yourself? IWANT YOUR LOVE BY KATIE KOLOOZIE, CLASS OF 2012 Recently, I was told that I have the "worst music collection" of anyone my friend has ever seen. When I challenged him that it probably wasn't the WORST collection, but merely one of the worst, he stuck to his guns. I'm sticking to mine. I don't think there's such a thing as "better" or "worse" music, only music that you (whoever you are) like or don't like. Your tastes are probably influenced by lots of things, like what you grew up listening to and the people around you. I have a sneaking suspicion that anyone who says so is doing the same thing I do whenever I try to convince someone that a science fiction novel is better than a romance novel. �ics with greater complexity and depth than We're making it up. Granted, I'm not a musician, and I don't another; these are all commendable. But have much in-born musical talent. I respect commercial, unoriginal music can fulfill this and envy anyone who can play an instru- purpose too. Maybe we could call music "better" when ment or seemingly instinctually analyze a piece of music. I've always listened to a lot more people like to listen to it, especially if of music, but ask me to sing a scale or write we assume that the popularity of the Beatles counterpoint, and it'll be work. So, I'm and Led Zeppelin means something. But if probably about as qualified to pass sweeping that's true, than Lil' Wayne and Lady GaGa musical judgments as a caveman is to judge are approximately 374,952 times better than the worth of a Swiss watch. Whatever. If I Palestrina and Beethoven by today's stansay somethin g that's just wrong, please write dards; hell, Nickleback probably has them in to drag me out of my cave. I'd like to beat too. Plato would probably throw out almost learn. I'm not arguing that my music tastes are all the music I like out of his Republic, with anything other than laughable. My room- the possible exception of "Sicut Cervus." He mate angelically puts .up with m e blasting can get off his high horse. Not everything we Lady Gaga and Cobra Starship all the time, do has to be profound and have deep philoand thanks to the friend mentioned above, sophical implications. There's room enough I actually have the Beatles on my computer for both music that takes concentration and now. But "hilarious" is different than "bad." patience to fully appreciate and Kanye West. I've always been a little slow musically; my Surrendering to simple, powerful emotions continual listening to Radio Disney in and the equally instinctual music inspired middle school taught me to have a pretty by them is a part of the human condition thick skin. I feel pretty much the same at that we enjoy. It's a hedonistic point of St. John's, where everyone seems to like re- view, but I suppose I view some hedonism ally sophisticated music and bands that five as healthy. people have heard of, or classic rock that When people go to Reality parties, they EVERYONE has heard of. I enjoy most of don't go to have their musical tastes exit; almost everything we sang in Freshman panded or to sample the complexity of huChorus I loved, and I'm pretty convinced man thought. They go to dance. A LOT of Queen was copying Dante's treatment of people go to Reality parties; most of them love and God in the Purgatorio when they aren't made unvirtuous by the experience, wrote "Somebody to Love." and most of them have a really good time. However, I appreciate bands like Cobra I'll be there, unashamedly, rocking out to Starship because they tap into raw human "Bad Romance. " emotions like love, defiance, and loneliness in a direct way without trying to be pretentiou~ artists. Their songs simply move me more than, say, Indie Emo Bands with incredibly nuanced lyrics and a flugelhom. What they have to say-even if it isn't earthEverything seems to be broken. It's hard shakingly profound- is accessible and interesting, requires nothing more than ears to enough to find an unoccupied washer and enjoy, if you like it. It's for the same reason dryer at this school, but it becomes twice that Las Vegas draws more tourists and pro- as hard when half of them are broken. And duces more money, jobs, and glitter in a year I'm sure we've all noticed that the novelty Of than does the entire state of Montana. One a paper and plastic dining experience begins to wear off after a week and a half. has a lot more charisma than the other. And it seems to me that all this music It's easy to get angry about these inconis doing the same thing: expressing things veniences. Why, just today as I was / that happen inside us, whether it's desire for removing my shredded underwear . r union with the divine or desire for the hot from one of the exposed screws in the dryer I caught myself guy next to you. What a lot of people seem to consider "bad" music does this about as cursing vehemently under well as "better" music. Because why else do my breath. I realized that we listen to music except to be moved by an I was not only cursing the emotion or idea and enjoy the process? I re- sharp screw for the quesalize I sound a little like Zuckerkandl (whose tionable sense of fashion it had forced name can actually be translated "Rock Can- upon me, but I was cursing the school dy"). I buy that one song can be more subtle, for its negligence of the machines. Still less commercial, more technical, or have lyr- steaming, I sat down on the couch in the THINGS BREAK BY PATRICK BEEBY, GLASS OF 2012 Campbell common room and put my feet up on the table. Surely a little quiet time with my nose in a book will calm my nerves. But once I got settled I noticed my feet rocking back in forth. I yelled an R-rated version of something like, "You too?! You lousy, stinking piece of nonsense!" and stood up glaring at the table with its legs awry. But then the realization that in the last fifteen minutes I had become irate at three different pieces of equipment brought me to my senses and I thought, I can fix this. So I carefully flipped the table on its side, found the loose screws, and tightened them back down with the handle of a measuring spoon- the closest thing I could find to a flathead screwdriver. I tell you all this to say that things break, and every once in a while we come across something fixable. All we need to do is keep a level head and roll up our sleeves. It was wrong of me to get mad at a screw and certainly wrong to curse this wonderful school. Work orders are beautiful things. You can make a free phone call, and in a couple days your chair, lock, or desk will be fixed- for free ! But it won't always be this easy, or cheap. The Land Lord is not so forgiving and The Plumber and Mechanic are followed by a bill. Knowing how to tum a wrench or work a screwdriver without striping the screw can go a long way around a house, apartment, or donn room. Today we tend to take a stance of apathy towards broken things. We just buy a new one. But there is something to be gained when repairing something that is broken. If you've ever fixed something, you know what I'm talking about. It is more than a feeling of accomplishment; it is a feeling of self-worth and self-reliance. And if what you're fixing is your own, it is a feeling of control and competence over your own property. Most of us guys are going to be dads, and kids are quite experienced when it comes to breaking things. And nearly all of us, guys and girls, can remember the feeling we had when dad fixed our ) new toy after we broke it. As students, the situation is a little different. The things we break are not always our own, and none of us is willing to replace a broken table in a common room. But the apathy is still there. We may say, "It's not my problem," or, "Someone else will fix it." But even though it may not be our problem directly, each of us is a member of the polity, a citizen of the group, and much of what we TH E GADFL Y, JANU AR Y 2010 3 �read here can teach us about how to be a good citizen. So if the chair you're sitting in is a little rickety, or the common room door won't shut, or the brakes on your bike don't work, try to find the problem and see if it's something you can fix. I promise you that someone on your hall has a small tool ki't that his or her dad made him or her drag to school. And if you are that kid, then dig that tool box out of your closet and charge your roommate a few bucks for fixing his desk. You can probably do it in the time it takes a YouTube video to load. If you make a mess, clean it up. If you clog the toilet, unclog it. And if you come across something that you can't fix, that work order is only a phone call away. Perhaps if we all help fix the little things, the school will stop needing to buy new stuff, and they will finally fix the dishwasher. TWINEBERRY-11 BY MICHAEL LACY, GLASS OF 2012 Entry from Sunday, February 19th, 1950 "Three days ago I was soaring alone with complete freedom, my Zeppelin afloat from the fire of those damned books. I cursed an astronomer and threw him in the flames- yet another ancien t moron wh o didn't kn ow where the sun was. I'd forgotten my compass, but I knew I could fly East towards the setting sun, and arrive early Monday morning. The plan was to land in Monaco as an international sensation (being the first m an to pilot an airship solo across the Atlantic), have my hero's welcome, an d before the ticker-tape was even swept into the ocean, use my fame to become a Grand Prix racer, win the M onaco Cup, knock-up Gisele Pascal (even though Prince Rainier couldn 't), and live in a golden h ouse boat on the M editerranean. The gods cursed my voyage, though , an d after only ten h ours of fligh t, my airship began to fail. Perhaps the heat of the sun melted some of the shape-giving gravy, but more likely my fate has imprison ed ·me to sadness, because a page, a single page of Life M agazine, the shell of the hollow machine th at was keeping me afloat, flew off. I remember the page, fluttering up past me while I fell from the clouds- it was the cover from December 26th, 1949. That glossy page, its image obscured be- 4 THE GADFLY, JANUARY 201 0 neath delicious gravy (which I once thought was my dearest friend), sealed my fate, and I fell. I descended towards a mountain, which threatens all with his waving trees. Using every trick I could think of, I steered my failing vessel away from the greatest hazards but to little prosperity. The pages deserted me; Marilyn and Joe floated up and away to places I wanted to follow. The trees thickened and branches grabbed and ripped my flesh like great fishing hooks, while my ship was torn asunder. Now it was only my wooden chair and me, colliding into limb after limb, bashing from trunk to trunk, when without warning, we stopped. Trembling, I peeked beyond to see if there was more, only to fall even further, another ten by tenfold feet, and discovered that •\' ' when you hit the ground... you know it. The chair was flattened, but not before an arm tore into my thigh, gouging a vicious wound. "Goddamnit!" I shouted. I lay hopelessly sprawled, blood boiling from my leg in turbulence, flesh foaming off like water from a cauldron, showing all my inner meat and bone as I groaned terribly. I stretched back and turned up to the infernal trees that had done their best to finish me and who now blocked my final viewing of that conniving sun. I resigned myself to die there in the dark (reminded oddly of laying beneath my half. brother's bed), thinking the least the gods' could grant me was a tan before I left. But there were other plans afoot for me on Friday morning. A thud soun ded off to my right, an d an enorn10us (probably eight-feet-tall) man appeared. He was dark-skinned and muttering, seemingly more annoyed than shocked at my means of entrance. This was not the regal welcome in to Monaco I was hoping for. He tended my wound, tying my .thigh round ten times with sailing line. "Where am I?" I asked this m an. H e replied in a thick guttural tongue I barely recognized. Then he picked up a book, the only on e I hadn 't burned, and pointed to the cover with a map on it- Cliffs Complete Notes to the Western Territory. This man was speaking in Bellenak, the most ancient of Languages in the Western Territory. He scrutinized my face, finally finding something unusual in my condition and brought forth the heavy object he had dropped when he saw me. 'Gerai menkow plenktu?' He asked me, and after glossing his words in Cliffs Notes for a while, I shook my head because I did not know what he was holding. Well, I knew what it was, I just didn't know how to say it in Bellenak. He asked again, more excited this time. When I confinned I didn't know how to say it, he gave up a wail to the heavens of the most immense joy and began burying it in the hole my fall had made, tears streaming from his eyes. After a few minutes of searching for words (while the cretin danced around his totem pole), I finally produced the phrase: "barteu axem premer," or "ship moving stick." The man stopped dancing. He glowered at me furiously. 'Barteu axem premer!' he repeated. He ripped the oar from the groun d and slung it over his shoulder, muttering the phrase over an d over. When he'd walked far enough to be obscured by the trees h e shouted to me in Bellenak: 'May the gods, who I've come to love though their curses, show you the error of your ways.' And he was gone. I find religion so terribly cliched." This entry will be continued in the next Gadfly. GETTING TECHNICAL WITH WORDS B Y BLEE BARKS, ANONYMOUS World history is testament to the power of the Word as both a creative and destructive force. W e read in the h oly scriptures, ''And God said, 'Let there be light,"' setting in motion an extraordinary chain of events resulting in a world that produced both Abrah am Lincoln an d Jerry Springer. In his light-hearted rewrite of the Genesis account, John tells us, "In the beginning was the Word." This statement has caused quite a bit of logomachy ever since. Considering our verbose world was wrought from only two speaking human beings, one can imagine the God of the Jews throwing up His hands and sh rugging, "Who knew?" Words, words, words- sung, shouted, spoken softly- creating new possibilities and also unforeseen consequences. This was the case at our beloved Teni.ple Igleh art in a recent basketball game between the noble �{SATIRE} DEAR GADFLY ''•o "My best ideas come to me on the toilet, but they're usually poop jokes. " • GreenWaves and the resolute Druids. The outcome of the contest is irrelevant. What caught this philosopher-historian's attention was a magnificent sequence of play, which demonstrated the power of the Word and the sublime, self-correcting beauty of basketball. This classic moment defies encapsulation, but encapsulation is precisely the duty of the wretched sports historian, such as Homer, on whose shoulders I stand. Therefore, I press on. This spectacular sequence, lasting barely one minute, began with a word from Mr. Krueger (the alpha) and concluded with The Word from Mr. Pickens (the omega). Mr. Krueger's initial utterance, so onomatopoeically complex, occurred when he breached the Druid defense, gained possession of the ball and secured two points for his team in an almost impossibly contorted manner. A lesser man would have pranced down court, beating his chest in faux caveman bravado. But Mr. Krueger instead manifested a vigorous defensive posture, so tenacious and unyielding that his opponent resorted to chicanery, using fingernails to gouge Kruegerian flesh in retaliation. Mr. Krueger, a just man, attempted dialectic with the official about this unsportsmanlike behavior. Mr. Pickens, the chief official, : chose to e.l!'.ercise the sovereign power of the whistle before using unambiguous Words to clarify his position to Mr. Krueger. A technical foul was born of their divergent expectations. I don't know what followed, as this exquisite exchange sent me into an ecstatic reverie from which I didn't emerge until the contest was concluded. I overheard one observer comment, "That was a good game," to which I responded, "Word." Gornie by Paul Morrill It's really, really easy to be ridiculously ugly, especially at St. John's. Trust me, I know. At my public high school, it was basically the case tl1at girls would kick my knees and spit at my feet whenever they wanted. And I didn't want them to because eventually one grows tired of bruises and buying new shoes. Fortunately, however, I was able to get myself out of tli.at scenario one year early, leaving high school after junior year. (I can't imagine the poor souls who would have had to stay longer, or those who would choose to milk it for five!) Now tl1at I am in college, I see that the girls here are a little bit uglier, but somewhat smarter than their high school counterparts. Sorry, that's a bit misleading: the girls here are far uglier than those back in senior high. They just don't make Johnniettes like tl1ey do Mansfieldians. This, of course, poses a huge problem. Because I was so used to hiding my face, not saying a word, and giving off an unpleasant aura of old cheese, I tl1ought I was prepared for life in Annapolis. But you girls require much less character in your selection of males; character I guess I have because ... The first semester half of you fell in love with me. You couldn't help yourselves. All it took was my superior chess abilities, my day-late essay handins, wearing the same clothes for weeks , or sauntering by you in the dining hall mumbling in Klingon. Or that I was as white as white can be (I guess you all come from the city or something). Now that it's second semester, I think we face the issues that have presented themselves to us. And leave me alone. If you'd like, I'll start bathing more regularly. I'll even start going to tl1e gym. I am the stronger sex, after all. But please: let me prove I'm shallower than you think me to be. -Josh Primiano Class of 2013 THE GADFLY, JANUAR Y 2010 5 �ALMODOVAR'S "BROKEN EMBRACES" BY PETER AXER, GLASS OF 2009 Pedro Almodovar's seventeenth film, "Los Abrazos Rotos" ("Broken Embraces"), will soon leave the Harbor Center. I recommend seeing it before it goes. The Spanish screenwriter/director has won many welldeserved international awards for his films. His films in the past ten years are complicated and sometimes perverse dramas that tenderly and insightfully explore how love, friendship, and art affect us. He effectively sets a nuanced emotional tone in his films, often sprinkling humor into drama without mocking his characters, yet still poking fun at them. There is no bitterness in these latest films, and he affirms the lives of all his characters who are generous and forgiving, and who struggle to live on in spite of loss and violence. In "Broken Embraces," we meet Lena (Penelope Cruz), a woman whose father is dying of cancer and who cannot afford to hospitalize him any place where he can get help. To finance a treatment for he,r father, she becomes a mistress to the much older and tyrannical Ernesto Martel, one of the wealthiest and most powerful men in Spain. After two years with Ernesto, she is selected to star in a film being made by Mateo Blanco. The two fall in love. Martel, however, sends his gay son (the funniest character in the movie) to spy on the lovers and film all their interactions on and off set. Martel finances the film ensures its ruin by choosing the worst takes for the final edit. .- - ,,". _. ~Ml, .-.~ ~ .. ~tt~Ll1Y aotte te.aMQMB IN 'IOU/ 6 THE GADFLY, mum 2010 These details make up only a small part within "Broken Embraces" told by Harry Caine, who was once Mateo Blanco. (Mateo Blanco lost Lena and was blinded and robbed of his creative passion for images ancl his beloved, he assumed a different name.) The telling of the story fourteen years after sets off a series of revelations from other characters which, once disclosed, show Harry Caine the path to remaking his last film. "Broken Embraces" is a story of triumph over all odds in order to create a piece of art. It's about the power of images and the secrets they reveal. Like all of Almodovar' s movies, it affirms that the divulgence of secrets leads to forgiveness and renewal. While not very profound, profundity is not what makes Almodovar's films worth seeing. Some people say Almodovar makes the same film again and again. It's true that he explores many of the same themes, like the incommunicability between the worlds of men and women, or how art shapes us. And he often reproduces plot structures, such as the pattern of denial, revelation, liberation. But he develops these staples in each of his films through imaginative and engaging stories. There is pull to these themes and stories; and besides that, his movies are quite funny. The images he composes are luscious, full of rich colors and attractive, or striking, people. They're filmed with warmth for his characters. Seeing an Almodovar film is a cinematic and emotional experience, and this is its virtue. I would recommend Almodovar also because of his ability to make his viewers sympathize with characters who seem ridiculous or even despicable. As Mr. Stephenson said in his recent lecture on literature, one of its benefits is that through it we can step into another person's shoes, and by this experience we learn how to accurately judge the people we encounter in our lives. It is worth pausing to consider why Almodovar wants us to sympathize with some of his flawed characters. Could it be that they are full of pathos? Almodovar isn't a novelist but a filmmaker, and his talent as such is that he reveals his characters' inner-lives through meaningful images, not written descriptions of everything they think and feel. An example of such an image in "Broken Embraces" is Gornie by Anna Perry �when Harry Caine leaves the hospital for the first time since being blinded in a car accident. He spends an hour at a beach with a five-year-old boy. (The boy is the son of his personal assistant and is there to guide Harry.) It's windy and slightly overcast, and he stands amidst the easy bustle of people around him, clearly detached and lost, though dignified. He is no longer the man he used to be. This moment is delicately evoked in one long shot, showing Harry standing in the mid-ground with his back to the camera. Almodovar need not resort to close-ups or voice-overs to reveal what is happening within his characters. He has effectively built up to this moment during the movie, and his images have enough meaning and emotional resonance. ASK ANYONE BY CAROLYN ZELIKOW, GLASS OF 2011 Apologies, friends. On a Tuesday afternoon, while the Expert dozed in a sun pod, little men crissed and crossed the Expert's wallet with whispers and whiskers of unfinished thoughts until the slanting day shown straight through it. The Expert woke and wondered but in vain. So it's bother to get scrips and smokes and too much much to scratch and rail. 'On a bed of flag-leaves, watching till she wake, they have kept her ever since, deep within the lake.' But, Impious, what are these words? Have you forgotten Brown Mouse, kettle and calves? May the Expert rather repeat: 'Twilight is not good for maidens. You should not loiter in the glen.' This week, the Expert labors to labor, and when a god needs guidance, divinity turns to Robert Herrick. This poet inspires potency with particularly vivid images of nature, such as the following: I dream' d this mortal part of mine Was Metamorphoz' d to a Vine; Which crawling one and every way, Enthrall' d my dainty Lucia. Note the internal rhyme of MORtal / MORphoz'd, and CRAWLing I RALI.!d my. What's most 'mine' - the death root 'mort' - now writhes with bacchic overabundance, recalling "A Nocturnal upon St. Lucy's Day": Study me then, you who shall lovers be At the next world, that is, at the next spring: For I am every dead thing, In whom love wrought new alchemy. But this is almost too suggestive of Wilmot: Such kind Show' rs in Autumn fall, And a second Spring recall: characteristic of a youth 'with more capacity for love than earth/ bestows on most of mortal mould and birth.' Alas, the Expert's unquiet dreams. To lighter spirits, merely tugged, ye ponymaned peonies, by the late gusting plague, heed Houseman. Aye, Shoulder the sky my lads, and drink your ale. Whereas the Expert's languor is fully MATH PUZZLE {POHI} TWO POEMS OF COMPOST The Death of Early Spring I love the smell of earth in early spring before the first green shoots push from the ground. last fall's decaying leaves an odor brings of death which stillness echoes all around. The wakened squirrels seek and ne'er in vain to find an acorn that they've buried near. But many in warm soil \Vill still remain to birth an oak for squirrel's offspring dear. A storm that's late in season blankets snow and buries once again the moldering mass. But ne'er will storm impede the crocus' growth for decay's warmth brings life and more to pass. There is a time twixt winter and foll spring when passing death can teach a heart to sing. Eco-Friendly A whiff of aspergillus in his lungs has led the ancient man unto death's door. And it's but quickly time till he succumbs: soon halted is his respiratory chore. "He will have died 'ere long, in any case." defends the girl of her composting heap who'd rather value highly rotting waste and weigh the value of his life but cheap. This is a famous puzzle based on the show "Let's Make a Deal." The host, Monty Hall, offers you a choice of three doors. Behind one is a sports car, but behind the other two are goats. After you have chosen one door, he reveals one of the other two doors behind which is a goat. He knows what is behind each of the doors, and will not open the door with the car. Now he gives you the chance to switch your choice to the other unrevealed door or to stay with your initial choice. You will then get what is behind that door. Should you stay, switch, or does it not matter? The first person to email elizabeth. fleming@sj ca.edu will have good karma for the rest of the month. Congratulations to Caleb Nolen for answering the last math puzzle correctly, first! -Elizabeth Fleming For any ecological design to save the planet from mankind is pure. And progress we must make till all repine under the pristine earth as man-manure. So marches on the logic of the Green, for to them human life is most obscene. -Jerome Dausman Graduate Student THE GADFLY, jANUARY 2010 7 �THE QUAD Confidentiality at St. John's-I of Ill An interview with Sara Austin. by Brandon Garney, Glass of 2012 What follows was originally intended to be a single article. I thought it was important that all three interviews be read at the same time. Unfortunately, due to space restrictions, the article has been chopped up into three segments. I offer no commentary so as to allow those interviewed to speak for themselves. Brandon Carney: To begin with, can you say what happened in regards to your meetings with Mr. Januszewski and Ms. Paalman? Sara Austin: I cut my foot on an unknown object, so they sent me to counseling [and I went] because a friend of mine said I should probably get some help. So I went to Mr. Januszewski and told him [my situation]*, and took his advice to heart and stopped doing those things. But the report of Januszewski went to Paalman and she decided that I needed a semester off, but [she claimed] it wasn't disciplinary action. BC: So you were sent to Mr. Januszewski? SA: Yes. BC: By Ms. Paalman? SA: Yes. BC: Before you were sent to him, what did you suppose his role here at the college to be? SA: I thought he was a counselor to help me, not to get me. BC: What do you now understand his role to be? SA: I don't know if his role is any different. I think that his role is definitely kind * I would like to thank Ms. Austin for being so forthcoming with specific details concerning her meetings with Mr. Januszewski and Ms. Paalman. I have chosen to leave out these details in order to protect her privacy. 8 THE GADFLY, JANUARY 2010 of messed over. I don't know what his role is now. I don't know what he is supposed to be. _ but I can't be sure. I don't really know what parts I can refuse and not refuse." He was very vague. BC: What do you think his proper role is? What do you think his role should be? BC: Did he make you feel like you could trust him with that information? SA: I think it should be a support system for students with problems that need help while continuing to be a student. I don't think he should be the middle man between me and things I don't want to tell Ms. Paalman. That doesn't seem fair. SA: Yes. He's a good guy. I did feel like that. I took his advice to heart. BC: Before you were sent to Mr. Januszewski, what did you think his policy on confidentiality was? , T -- SA: I was sort of told that the information had to be told to Ms. Paalman, but I didn't really think about that very much. In hindsight I know that he probably shouldn't have told her those things because I did ask for him to exclude some parts of what I said and he did not. BC: Did Mr. Januszewski make explicit his policy on confidentiality before allowing you to speak to him? SA: He did. He said, "I need permission to tell Ms. Paalrnan." I asked him whether there were some things I could refuse to tell him. That he was a little bit vague about. I asked him "Well, if I tell you this are you going to tell Ms. Paalman? Am I going to get in trouble?" He said, "I don't know. I don't think any disciplinary action will be taken, BC: What do you now understand his policy on confidentiality to be? SA: It was presented to me like I had the choice whether he told Paalman or not. Apparently within the context of the school, if you are sent by mandate by an administrator to a counselor, he's obligated to tell her everything. I was sort of presented with it like I had an option, so I thought that they were kind of tricking me in that sense. He was going to tell whether I gave him permission or not. I had no idea that, if I was being sent there by force, he got to tell her everything he wanted. I didn't think that was the point of counseling. I thought it was more for me, and for him to report to her on whether I'm making progr~ss and continuing to see him. BC: Do you think that Mr. Januszewski's attitude towards confidentiality undermines his proper role? SA: I don't know if it's his attitude on confidentiality or the fact that he has to tell Ms. Paalman things, but I �,, ',-' '{>0'' <:c~~·'.;f.'_'.;:·,,:,'.·,"-"~:·.·::·· DISPATCH FROM BONAliRE definitely think that the fact that he is being forced to tell this infonnation to Ms. Paahnan, and Ms. Paalman is trying to take action on things told in privacy to a counselor [by someone] seeking help ... I mean, I think it's useless because no one's going to be honest any more. I told everybody about the situation. I was pretty upset. Anyone that needs help now, I don't think that they can necessarily find it on campus if he's the only counselor. BC: Before meeting with Ms. Paalman, what did you suppose her role to be here at the college? SA I really didn't think about it that much. I didn't have to visit that office very much last year. I thought, especially in my case when she sent me to counseling, that she was trying to help me. She told me, "You have to take a semester off. Your going to counseling will really increase the chances of your being let back in." That's definitely disciplinary action. Just because you're calling it "not disciplinary action," that doesn't mean that its not. I guess in this case I didn't feel like she had my best interests at heart. BC: I guess my question is: before you went her, did you think that her place was to try to help students or to try to discipline students? she should be looking out for us before looking out for the reputation of the security office and how harsh they are, which is what I felt she was doing in this circumstance-laying down the law. BC: So now what do you understand her role to be-a disciplinarian or an aid? SA: She retracted her statement after a lot of involvement from my parents. She is letting me come back. Now she's making me go to [other sources of help]*. I guess she changed her mind, _ but only when presented "\.. ~with a fairly strong argu~ ment from someone • else. I can't speak for all the other cases, but in • my case I felt like it was definitely more about discipline than about me getting the help that I needed....- SA I guess kind of a combination of both. This is her campus, we are her students, THE GADFLY, JANUARY 2010 9 �{POEM} DETROIT LOVE STORY in the hopes they'd make him doze a knocking on his door arose. He just sat there like a dope. Though they said he was a phony still he ran his big Zamboni on the tons of macaroni that fed relentless flames. is expected, but through each squall stood they together conquering all. Happy ending, don't you think? She had followed minutes later after him who left a crater in her heart and wouldn't date her, but she never gave up hope. -Jerome Damman Graduate Swdent {POEM} In his mind he was a hero as he chilled the ice near zero while his boiler blazed like Nero enticing all the dames. To the door he dragged feet slowly bearing countenance quite lowly. Then door opened ... "Holy Moley! 1t' s the gorgon! Why' s she here? " Hockey groupies by the dozens would lie and say they're cousins of Red Wings (but they wasn't) to gain the locker room. She ignored his words, so cruel: was it love, or was she fool? Nonetheless in vestibule she relieved him of his beer. He believed they lied to meet him, and with flowery words they'd greet him, but they only served to cheat him and would foretell love's doom. "Listen Morgan, you must shape up! You're a man, you're not son1e young pup! I'll make dinner, you go wash up." Snumed, he went and washed his hands. Every night she plays the organ as she gazes down on Morgan but to him she was a gorgon: her face resembling death. Day by day she calmed his worries as he set out in snow flurries job hunting. i\nd so he hurries till at last a job he lands. She loved would-be lotharian and l-new those girls weren't marryin' the driver who was carryin' rank garlic on his breath. Over time he did recover and evenmally discovered that he fondly grew to love her, she who saved his broken heart. Then one night with boiler hissin' Morgan's leal·y steam was pissin' on the ice and made it glisten, just before it mrned to slush. Noticed she, this new arousal. When he deigned to make things spousal she accepted his proposal. They were married, ne'er to part. That night the game was cancelled. Morgan's hopes for kisses were quelled with the girls for whom he angled when he found they had no crush. Each new day brought these two closer: this kind girl and he who chose her. And each night to bed she would lure him, the man who was her prince. Home alone he trudged quite weary with his teary eyes so bleary. In his mind there was a query: Shall I always be alone? Life for poor and lower classes, those unlucl1' lads and lasses may look bright through tinted glasses. You, dear reader, I'd convince. Arriving home with snow descending thinking of his firing pending: it was beyond comprehending, all his hopes were overthrovm. We might think that life was rosy in their love nest, oh-so cozy. We'd find troubles, if we're nosy, troubles to drive one to drink. Then while guzzling his first Stroh's In our lives some little rainfall 1a THE GADFLY, JANUARY 2010 HE'S SO VAIN Being starved for cash The Gadfly let Mr. Johns pay for an issue. Crying while I read that trash. I used mine for a tissue. Horrendous did we read the inhumanity. Smpendous at St. John's was this insanin·. Tremendous is the extent of his great vanity. To one question this poem responds: who is this youth, this same Chris Johns? Does he surpass all our school dons wielding his myriad batons of activities as magic wands excelling in all that corresponds? Do we stream to grandmaisons at his attending their salons while he sips Dom Perignons? ls he much cooler than the Foru:, die pinnacle of all Don Juans attracting redheads, brunettes and blondes? Do J ohnniettes buy his come-ons? Should we cast his bust in bronze and strew his path with fresh palm fronds? Will we fall for all his cons? This youth, this pup, this bounder: he'd have us think that he's Saint Johns! -Jerome Dausman Graduate Sti1dent �DODD ON THE QUAD J.D. Salinger Dies at 91 BY KIRSTIE DODD Writing this article is an eerie e..xperience for me. I was intending to print an article about ·writing a fan letter to J.D. Salinger, but then I read last Thursday that he died. This immediately made me think r..vo things: 1) Is my column now like The Black Spot? and 2) Crap, I can't p1int that article. Though the original article wasn't offensive or anything, I used some-er-miffed invectives against the man. I wrote him a letter gushing about how he summed up my childhood with the gritty sincerity of his protagonists and he inspired me and blah blah blah; he never wrote back and so I took out my revenge in a Gadfly article. But that's the lesson I should learn: never write letters to misanthropes, and certainly never write letters t0 recluses because they make bad pen pals. I mean, sure, I totally ignored the fact that he told newspapers in 1974: "I like to write. I love to v.rrite. But I iNTite just for myself 'jEAH1 ttti ~ c"1f ~EAi- and my own pleasure." Of course he'd the night, wondering if it was my awful letter write to me, I thought, addressing the that killed J.D. Salinger rather than simply letter to Cornish, N.H., this letter is the natural cause of living to a ripe old age freaking charming-it's going to jockey outside of the hurly-burl of the limelight. 1 its way in front of all of that tripe-y can picture him opening the envelope and Holden Caulfield fan mail and melt extracting the pages littered with curvaceous all the ice in his highball. red ink, straining his poor eyes to read yet Well, he didn't write back. And another droll and dopey fan letter. And now he can't ever. I've been tcl.i.inking then, his eyes widening, he clutches at his a lot about that letter I wrote him as neck, thinking something like, "Didn't I I take solitary Salingeresque walks in teach them anything?" Letting the letter fall the snow. If I knew then what I know to the floor, he sinks back, exhausted, into now-that he would soon pass away-I his plush kelly green recliner to have fitful probably would have made a better at- nightmares about the slow collapse of Our tempt at being less phony. I described Nation's Youth. The man deserves nothing short of encomy childhood bookcase for chrissakes. I told him about how each shelf represents differ- mium-especially from me. I did him a disent archaeological levels in my childhood service in my last article, and my letter to reading development and how I cleared him said all of the v-rrong things. I should out Beatrix Potter and those campy Roman have said something like, "Thank you, mystery novels in a fit of freshman zealous- Mr. Salinger, for buoying the disillusioned ness for the Program, and now I can't find young reader otherwise doomed to boring where I put any of them. I told him Franny t<? high school classes on Ethan Frame and The Zooey is my favorite book and I keep it near Awakening, for your inimitable Glass family, my collection of "Betty & Veronica" comic for inspiring every would-be New Yorker stobooks because they belong together on the ry v.rriter, for your subtle irn.pressions about "Read When Sick In Bed" shelf. I scribbled Eastern philosophy, and for your perfectly insane things to that man, about how I felt a sad and wonderful Holden, immortal Holdlittle bibliomaniac nestled somewhere in the en." That would have been far more sincere warm spot of my heart near the aortic valve, and lovely. I guess I'll try ·writing a different fan letter piloting me to smell bindings and lovingly caress old books and whisper curses against with a different author, say, Thomas Pynthe Kindle at every free moment. cheon. A.11d tli.is time I'll do it for the fat Since Thursday, I've woken up from in- lady, buddy. ~ voluntary spasms and starts in the middle of fZ.Allfilll'f • :I MEM·J' ""f\1.() L.~, r-. 1 s~·Jr-·re"'r . Gornie by Max Parrott THE WHY, !!IUARY 281Q 11 �THE GADFLY 60 College Avenue Annapolis, Maryland 21401 United States of America '&litor-in-Chief JOCKS O' THE WEEK KiTStie Dodd ]unicrr '&litcrr Elizabeth Spagnoletti Design Editor ]. Keenan Trottet Businw Manager Marin Skokan.die: Graphic Arti.<t Noah Litvin Spots Jack.Neill Contributors Peter .Axer Blee Barks Rachel Bartgis PatrickBeeby John Blechl Brandon Carney Jerome Dausman Emma Gold Chris Johns Katie Kolocbie Michael Lacy Kaura Mackey Paul Morrill Pavlas Papadopoulos Max Parrott Anna Perry Louis Petrich Josh Primiano EmilySebell Carolyn Zelikow F ounded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus. Opinions expressed within are the sole responsibility of the author(s). The Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, informative, and thought-provoking newspaper which circumstances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. The Gadfly meets every Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the BarrBuchanan Center. All articles are due at 11:59 PM on Thur~day. The Gadfly recommends Strunk & White's The Elements of Style and the Chicago Manual of Style to you, the Polity; your usage of semicolons may benefit. 12 THE GADFLY, JANUARY 2010 "Everything For the Smoker" Tel: 410-263-2066 Fax: 410-263-4647 56 Maryland Avenue Annapolis, Maryland 21401 shop@smokeshopusaltd.com The Gadfly would like to welcome our new interns, Annika Schwiebert & Lydia Boaz! Welcome to the family. � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 12 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXII, Issue 1 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2010-01 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXII, Issue 1 of The Gadfly. Published January 2010. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 32.1 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/181c77e7031530634c81d546eaefc691.pdf 02e8c6f9594f560dce9c599039c3f6fc PDF Text Text �\ ty and staff salaries are frozen, and spending has been curtailed in almost every area. Neglecting our facilities, however, could have more serious consequences for the college in the long run. LETTERS CHRISTOPHER B. NELSON, PRESIDENT A recent letter from an alumna to The Gadfly questioned how the college is spending a $1.695 million grant from The Hodson Trust. The letter writer asked why the college would devote $1.2 million of the grant to the construction of a new administrative building instead of using it to lower tuition or increase financial aid. In fact, $500,000 of the grant will go to support need-based scholarships. However, as the letter writer herself suggested, the larger part of the grant from The Hodson Trust was earmarked for capital projects only. A generous supporter of St. John's, The Hodson Trust funds major new programs or building projects at the four Maryland colleges to which it makes annual grants. The Trust also provides funding for Hodson Internships at St. John's. This small new building is intended to house faculty offices, a meeting room that can also be used for seminars and preceptorials, and administrative offices. After it is complete, we will move several administrative staff functions to this new building, freeing up Carroll Barrister House to be used exclusively for admissions. Next we will begin on a long-overdue renovation of Carroll Barrister, shoring up this historic, but heavily used, building. A top priority of our campus master plan is to improve this building so that prospective students and their families are given the best first impression when they visit the St. John's campus. It is understandable that students and alumni question the college's financial decisions during this economic downturn. This recession will no doubt continue to affect alumni, and our students and their families, for some time. With these concerns at the forefront, the college last year enacted the smallest tuition increase in 20 years, raising tuition just 2.9 percent for this academic year. At the same time, the college added $1 million to its budget for financial aid by trimming expenses across the board. More than 60 percent of St. John's students receive aid to attend the college, and the average St. John's grant is $22,000. In terms of college priorities, funding need-based aid is second only to preserving the quality of the program. This year, all St. John's offices went through additional belt-tightening: staff positions have remained unfilled, facul- 2 THE 6ADFlY, FEBRUARY 2010 I was disappointed today to open The Gadfly and not find another article from Ms. Gold. I believe we can all accept the truth: we have sex. We are here at St. John's to examine ourselves in some sense, so why must we leave that part of our lives unexamined simply because some people are too uncomfortable to speak about it? And of course, this inability to speak of sex and sexual activity has (and surely will continue to) lead to acts of sexual harassment that go unreported and unspoken of because of the shame that comes with broaching the topic, or the question: "Does that even count as sex?" "What will people think of me if I talk about something like this?" I, for one, do not see a column addressing the sexual (read: natural) concerns of the Polity as analogous to Cosmo, but rather the Symposium. We are thinkers; let us think, in the bedroom and out. RILEY SPICER, CLASS OF 2011 To Katie Kolodzie, Class of 2012: Please note: Zuckerkandl' s name cannot be translated as "Rock Candy." ELSABE "INA" DIXON, CLASS OF 2010 Note: Upon prompt, Ms. Dixon offers the more accurate translation of "lollopop" (sugar stick). In response to Blee Barks' article in the February 2nd issue of The Gadfly, "Getting Technical with Words,'' I am not sure if you meant to imply that Jerry Springer stood at the opposite pole of rhetorical skill or human achievement from Abraham Lincoln. But I would like to point out that Springer was a popular and progressive Ohio politician in the 1970s, including a year as the mayor of Cincinnati. This was before his career as a talk show host. SASHA SEREBRYANNIK, CLASS OF 2012 I am surprised that while you spoke with such pride, you clearly think very little of your own sex - as if we were so simple a bunch that you needn't hesitate to speak for us all. I, on the other hand, realize that part of what makes us so fair is that we are a complex and thoughtfully diverse breed, and that there is a reason more than one of is us is allotted to each class. So, in order to be more fair to the sex which is called just that, I will speak here only for myself. Campbell, Thank you. It's easy at St. John's to sink down into dork despair, resigning myself to the idea that I go to a school that's as poor in looks as it is rich in negative and derisive Gadfly articles. Thank you for recognizing and pointing us to the truly beautiful, or should I say, ridiculously good looking women with whom we are blessed to share the table and quad. I believe it was the deep thinker Rousseau who recognized that, "Men who have morals are the true worshipers of women." It's good to know there is at least one around. ANONYMOUS Unbeknownst to me, my wallet fell out of my bag when I was in the McDowell Hall coffee shop last Thursday night between classes and I didn't even realize it was missing until I got home (in Virginia) at about 11 PM that night. I called St. John's Public Safety and was told that a student had turned in my wallet so I could pick it up in the Security Office. I asked for the student's name but they didn't have it. Thank you to that student, whoever you are! I figured I could do without the wallet for a few days, until Monday night's classes. Then with classes being cancelled due to the astronomical amount of snow and bad weather, I knew it would be a while before I could get back to campus. So I called to see if my wallet could be mailed to me. After a couple of referrals, I spoke to Sharon Hensley at the Graduate Institute and she was kind enough to pick up my wallet, take it the post office on Tuesday and have it mailed to me, bless her heart. Thanks so much to Ms. Hensley! Just wanted to share with the college community what good people are a part of St. John's. SUSAN LAROCCA, GRADUATE STUDENT In the coming days, weeks and months, you will begin to hear many things on campus about "reform" and "courts". You may hear about them from your elected delegates and officers of the D.C., from interested peers, and even read about them in the pages of The Gadfly. Don't be alarmed. It's just that as people and polities get older their interests begin to shift, and they get interested in kinkier and different things in order to keep the old spark alive. Things like proportional representation, responsibility, and self-governance. This semester, my first as your President, was the beginning of my fourth on the D.C. Over the past two years I have seen crisis after crisis that the D.C. wasn't able to deal with effectively or efficiently. The perpetual �issue, it seemed to me and others, was that the D.C. wasn't equipped to ·handle some of the issues that were coming up before it (audits, inflating budgets, freshmen), and wasn't even allowed to handle others that involved the student polity. To begin to deal with these problems, I have submitted some proposed reforms to the Polity Attorney that will begin the process of amending the constitution. Some of the simpler reforn1s include the abolition of the so-called "King's Clause", seat redistribution, voting refonn, as well as budgetary and financial obligation reforn1s. The big reform I am proposing, however, is the creation of a polity court. I believe that this is a large and important step in the ·direction of self-government, one that will allow polity issues to be settled by polity members. I deeply believe in taking these sorts of responsibilities upon ourselves, and I can think of no better reform to truly change polity life for the better. It may surprise some of you that we used to have a polity court. Between the early sixties and the mid-eighties the court played a large role in polity life. It was originally fonned when the dorn1s went co-ed, as the students objected to heavy-handed anti-sex disciplinary action by the administration. The court was able to allow the students to set their own standards of decency, which we can thank for the wonderful amount of Johnnie sex as well as certain Gadfly columns. Change we can believe in. As recently as 2002 reconvening of the court was considered, but ultimately failed due to unknown causes (the past is just so damn murky). The college has, like it always will, changed completely and not at all since we last had a polity court, but I think the time is right to give it another go. As a polity, I think we need such a body in order that we may set out and enforce our own standards of behavior, instead of taking our cues from the administration. Many people have already voiced their support, and I hope that the whole campus can come together and create a system that we can be, if not proud of (hubris will get us anyway), reliant on. So in the coming days when you see signs and e-mails about polity wide meetings on these propositions, please come. Nothing is set in stone. Voice your support, or disapproval. Help us write them. Bring new ideas. Write angry letters to The Gadfly. We need a better issue of contention in these pages than bondage and the fleeting thoughts of sex-crazed freshmen anyway. DAVE MAHER, CLASS OF 2011 AND PRESIDENT OF THE STUDENT POLITY let Us Be Provoked! This article is meant to serve as a response to Ms. Mackey's letter in the most recent issue of The Gadfly, in which she succinctly expresses her "disappointment" at articles she tenns to be "reminiscent of that disgusting rag known as Cosmopolitan." I assume she is referring to The Gadfly's latest installment entitled "Of Johns and Johnnies." "Of Johns and Johnnies," recently begun by Ms. Gold, class of '12, focuses on providing an open forum for students or community members who wish to discuss or have questions pertaining to sex and sexually related topics. Ms. Mackey's main points seem to revolve around the precepts that articles written for The Gadfly should primarily serve to entertain and be enjoyed, and that "what happens in the bedroom should stay in the bedroom." Personally I find these precepts disappointing, irresponsible, and, at best, arguable. When I was a sophomore I attend sexual ethics seminars hosted by a now-disbanded group called the Women's Circle. The discussions were meant to confront the fact that there are many hushed up incidents on campus that involve the grey areas around sexual consent (what can be understood to be rape as opposed to an unfortunate and unwanted "drunken hookup"? , etc.), how sexual politics effect the classroom and community, and how we as a campus and a polity can create a safer atmosphere for those who have questions and/ or wish or need to discuss incidents that they are uncomfortable with. There were only two points that everybody involved in those discussions seemed to be able to agree on: first, that it is difficult if not impossible to enforce overarching ethical codes that define what is or is not all right in "grey area" situations, and second, that discussion of sexual ethics is imperative to a healthy polity as it serves to help the individual consider these questions for themselves. This is a community in which, whether or not we like to admit it, sexual politics is a primary issue (this is the first point Ms. Gold made in her very first article, I'm simply reiterating). I have witnessed students be socially ostracized for acts they may or may not have committed, students express sentiments such as "I always hit on the most drunk girls because they're the easiest," students who don't report or even willingly discuss upsetting incidents because they don't know where accountability lies. These are extreme examples. More common examples include a plethora of discussions I've had with students who are sexually active and know little to nothing about contraception and THE GADFL Y, FEBRUARY 2010 3 �the prevention of STDs, discussions where people are frustrated with their sex lives and refuse to even discuss it in the bedroom, let alone without, or how few men are aware of there being a physical difference between the act of orgasm and ejaculation (which may seem trivial, but if more openly discussed could rescue many frustrated sexual relationships). Simply discussing these and related issues allows individuals to define and explore their own sexual ethics. Ms. Gold's articles have already begun provoking these discussions. Suppressing discussion because "what happens in the bedroom should stay in the bedroom" promotes an atmosphere of ignorance and leaves doors open for irresponsible behavior and leaves doors shut to awareness and change. This is a school that operates from that ideal that open, honest discussion is a primary means of education. Discussion allows for us to voice, and subsequently listen to and define, our own opinions and politics. The Gadfly is a respectful forum for discussion, not simply a means of entertaining. Where are discussions to be provoked if not in The Gadfly? While I take umbrage with Ms. Mackey's points, I am glad that she voiced her opinion honestly such that I may take up this discussion and voice mine. I hope that this is a discussion that continues to be supported by The Gadfly, as well as provoked and respectfully debated at St. John's parties and in the dining hall for the sake of our polity's well-being. I hope that Ms. Gold continues to be bold enough to provoke us to consider and examine our sexual selves without shame. NORA EDGE Is the Program Fair? To take up such a question will come as a surprise and as a shock to any reader who has followed my thoughts and views throughout the year; such a question, though, demands an answer even from the stoutest supporters and the most stubborn detractors of the Program. This question really asks: how can Liberal Education be a beneficial and necessary form of bettennent in today's world, especially when the general direction of education is moving in another way? However, since I do not wish to overstep my bounds, and speak about Liberal Education in general when I only have particular knowledge, I must limit myself to our blessed Program; in this limiting, I hope to demonstrate the seriousness in my answer. From a certain point of view, the Program is foolish because it both attempts to move away from the general motion of the world 4 THE 6ADFL Y, FEBRUARY 2010 and it supersaturates its students' heads concern; they show, by their objection, an with more information than what is practi- actual and sincere caring for the students cally possible to retain. These two objections here. Their indifference, it must be noted, to our Program have been the battle-cry for would not lead to an objection; the stronevery opponent that I have encountered in ger the indifference, the less likely a voiced my tenure at the School. These opponents, objection would arise. And the vast majorit can be concluded, can be found via their ity of people are indifferent and thus they particular objection; I shall endeavor to neither know nor care about our Program. treat each in fairness and respect. These people, for all their worth, must not Those who object to the Program on the be allowed to enter d1is answer. However, grounds that it moves away from the gen- for those who do openly object, we find that eral motion of the world are the concerned the strength of their objection, as well as the friends of the students of the Program; that amount that it is recast, tells us that they is, parents, relatives, disinterested parties, actually beg for knowledge about our Proand even those who are sugram. The defenders of Liberal Education, and the supporters of our Program, should perficially opposed to not take their objections as an insult and education in general. Their common elea want for war, but rather as the indiment which binds rect request to act as the supporters them is the need of the Program naturally act; that is, for practicalthey beg us to teach them about the ity, though, Program. This objection, to put it into the Language of our Instituit must sadly tion, is an "opening question," be admitted, that their unan invitation for Conversation. derstanding When viewed properly, we lose of the term is the uncomfortable and awkward rather narrow. feeling that we inherently feel when we must discuss our Program They, for the most part, comwith these objectors, and we gain prehend practithe comfort and the ease of talking cality by the very to and helping people who are on the brink of our friendship . Hopefully, we motion of the world in which they offer as can see how this seemingly practical obsupport of their claim; jection is really a theoretical request. The second kind of objection apfor them, what is practical is what is immediatepears as a different sort of cry; indeed, we are at once struck ly apparent as a need. These with the fact that the objecare like the mechanic who only fixes the immediate problem un( ~ tor knows our Program well der the hood, but fails to grasp '\../' enough to know the speed {' and accuracy in which we the car's situation as a whole and will thus see the same l • (\\ .· handle the Great Books. vehicle again very soon; that To their credit, their is, these opponents are overlyobjection is, in prinsensual and lack the foresight to "') ciple, valid. I most passionately can attest to see beyond the immediate. I will admit a great secret to the fact that after four years of all the amazing you: I was once one of these people. I worked my full-time job with overtime, I works that I have read and studied, I still argue slept and dreamed about sensual things, I that I know very little. I had my regular seat at my regular bar, and simply ask you to hearken my goals beyond the next week were but vague and hazy objects that, when pressed, back to any reading and see how well you recall not only I could find no words to describe. In this the general point of the readway, I believe that the world prepared me for the Program; like Augustine, I could not ing, but also the particular find my happiness but was all the while bedetails of the argument as the ing prepared to find it. This School is my means to get to that end. It often is asserted that in matGarden. ters of scholarly attire, the Because I can relate to these objectors in method or means is just the closest way, I must sympathize with their O 0 \..J �as important as the end result. Taking this to be true, how well can any of us recall ·with satisfacdon the argument made by u.\e Great Mind who Vv""TOte the work? To combat this problem, we begin to make the Program our own. The normal course of defense is to begin to take notes. Regardless if this is simple underlining and highlighting, or if it takes a more drastic form of notes in the margin or even notebooks about the books, we attempt, as best we can, to cut up the constant flow of information into manageable pieces. These pieces eventually are logged and categorized, placed into a system of notes or into some order in a notebook, where we can then reference them as a quick refresher. These notes do not have to be physical; indeed some students, and I claim the better of us (myself not included, as I take more physical notes than anyone I know), can hold this entire system in their minds. However, we all proceed in the same fashion, if you truly attempt to be apart of the Program; we rake notes in order to conserve space in our brains. Insofar as these objectors mean simply this, their ground is more than justified. Ir is true that h'lales was not a young man when he began to teach. A striking and almost universal characteristic of the Great .A.uti\ors is that u.tiey are both well-read and well-on in years. Wit...1-i each passing generation, die possibility to hold the same amount of k.'1owledge lessens - insofar as we can take u.tie time to study what they have studied. The Program, however, does not rely on this kind of thinking. Instead, what these objectors fail to realize is that we must then take the new philosopher and study him too. Because philosophy is constantly growing and expanding, we cannot take the same amount of time to study as the Great Aut...'iors have studied. 'We even see that, with very rare exceptions, the modern philosophers stay content in the context of d1e immediate phiiosophical problem, or of those of a prior generation once removed. Indeed, those who do bring up the ancients do so in the same way that we attempt to suppress all die readings into notes: they give brief and broad sketches of then;.. Thus we come to find that these objectors actually doubt their own education, and the claims of Liberal Education. They forget that we learn more how to live philosophically, t...h.an d1e various and enonnous philosophical systeras. No doubt, it is these philosophical systems that we must compress in our heads, but the living way of life that we learn here is always present and quite simple to grasp. We come to understand this philosophical way of hfe through the very philosophical systems that we encounter. The Stoa is not a hard concept to understand, and Christianity is easily infused into lives; Philosophy, taken as a breathing entity and not as a dead-dogmatic object, moves in the same way. Thus, we find u.1-iat these objectors, who appeared as d1eoretical or intellectual objections, are in fact practical in their claims. It is a short step to see how Philosophy is practical as a way of life; their own education should provide the necessary details. These people are our brothers and sisters; when they realize that even their education is for the sake of iiving philosophically (a fact that is often missed) j u s t as our education teaches us, we all come to realize the true relationship th.at we have with the rest of the Realm of Learned Men and Women. There is a final objection that I do not hear from anyone except the acn1al sn.iden:s of the Pro- gram; this objection should be taken most seriously, as it comes directly from "the mouu.1i of babes." This objection, which I myself have felt and constantly feel, is one that ultimately will justify the Program; indeed, it is only through this objection that I have come to so passionately support this Institution. This objection looks at the Program from the inside, not externally as our other friends and siblings have done. The basic thrust of the objection to the fairness of the Program involves time management. It goes vlithout question that the demands of the Program are high, even more so when one begins to realize that each v.rork is inexhaustible and thus there Vvill never be an end to u.1-ie toiL \fie all handle this realization in various ways, but the motto of our Program, and what we should be taking as the important piece of knowledge, is that we must live philosophically, and thus we cannot, nor should, expect an end to our pursuit. To live philosophically is to live, and only in death can we be stopped in our ambition. Most philosophers, Socrates and Dante being the shining examples, tell us that still the learning will continue even in death; in fact, the true learning will be done there. The objection comes not from t.lie demands of the Program, but from the demands of everything else that is not the Program. School is only a part of our lives. We work, we love, sleep, we eat, we watch sporrs and read magazines. We need more than just the Program and we readily know this and admit it; our various clubs and the athletics program are just manifestations of this objection. We come to believe that the Program is something outside everything else in our lives, something leisurely and not necessary, an opposition to the rest of our lives. We go to certain rooms in certain building to learn the Program; we go other places to parry and to work and to love. To rectify the Program is to synthesize it with the other elements of our lives, to understand that it is just as necessary as any other part. This is the true aim and goal of living philosophically: to understand that, when properly understood, it means simply to live and to live better. The Program is not in opposition to our lives (for then we, as students, would be opposed to ourselves), but rather the Program collects the pieces of our lives and offers us how to live each of them in a better way. True, our education here is only four years, but to become a true student of the Progran1 is to u:nderstand tl-iat: these fours years is only formal training for the rest of our lives. When we understand that, we cannot hold everything that d1e Progran" has to offer wiu.1-iin us. When we subjugate ourselves to this fact, when we find humility and therefore hope and freedom in our alignment of will with the Program, then we can finally quiet our O\Vn objection tc ourselves, that weak part of all of us that screams of fairness only in the effort of self-preservation. We can become true philosophers and true friends, true teachers and true brothers, true students and rrue ambassadors. What is fairer than that? JOHN BLECHL m s;m1. ;mum 2010 5 �Twineberry-111 "O!, reader of this my painful chronicle, I know that the details of my adventure are confusing and impossibly strange, but I merely report what has occurred, and I think very it will soon become much clearer. Though first, it must be even more obscure. After this zealot departed from me, I did my best to make my way through the heavy brush, in search of some society. I heard noises following me for miles, and I turned many times, dreading the presence of a hungry leopard or packs of she-wolves or whatever terrible predators this land is home to. I felt relief as I came to a clearing, an oasis of flat land without thickets or crisscrossing trees. I discovered the reason for this was that the ground was nothing but quicksand. In a moment I had sunk two feet, which isn't an incredible depth in reference to people of average height, but I found it rather constricting. Suddenly I was wrenched from the muck and mine eyes did fall upon, outlined stunningly by the bright orange sun, a native woman, impossibly ·tall and shrewdly elegant, more beautiful than the most beautiful woman I could imagine. As large as the oar-carrying man, she easily lifted me from the trap and set me upon the solid ground to the right. I was in love. She spoke nothing to me, and led me through the day to a place she wouldn't reveal. I attempted to speak to her in English, Bellenak, and even some romance tongues but she kept aggressively silent. That night we made camp beneath the shelter of enorn10us fallen logs. She built a fire, proficiently prepared a meatless supper, and when it was over, I tired to return the favor. I wasn't sure of the proper etiquette in propositioning a native, so I stood upon a large rock to be on equal level, then thrust my lips upon hers and fondled her watern1elonesque bosom. The technique would probably have had more luck in the Eastern Territory- they're less closed minded about such things. While she _.....--:::::: didn't holler or slap me, 6 THE GADFLY, FEBRUARY 2010 she did have a strange reaction. She pulled tions into this ancient world. This is where back and held my head very intently, staring Stringfellow came thirty years ago, and into my eyes for what felt like three whole where he still takes trips as often as he can. minutes. Then she began to laugh tremen- 0, what cruel fate would bring me here! dously, and went off to prepare her shelter The giant native who escorted me, whom for sleep. I still swoon for hopelessly, took me to the While I'm not a man unaccustomed to leader of this facility. He is a portly and being put out, I never let a bit of passion reverential man (a little dull minded if you go to waste. I went off from the camp, a bit ask me for he hardly speaks) by the name of frazzled, and relieved myself of the excite- Tom. "Good-day, Ohmnu," he said to her. ment beside a rambling stream that was rust "Good-day, Tom," she replied in English! colored from the fading sunlight, thinking "This blind-fool has wandered from the of the woman's face. When I had finished place of you observers, and he needs a treatit'd grown dark, and it took me a lifetime ment for his wound," she continued, pointto find the camp again. I found my guide ing to my leg. "Blind-fool! Who's she callsleeping contentedly in her well-crafted ing a blind-fool?" I retorted. Tom looked at nook. I didn't rest well. The thickets around me with a calm expression that searched my me stirred and murmured. Great skirmishes face, and finally said: "It's an idiom of the of snakes and mice there sounded from the people here. Don't be offended; it's a name sundry leaves while the deathly yelps of fox- we all must go by when we arrive as strangers es kept me wide-eyed and alert. I felt a cer- here. Welcome to the Western Territory." tain disgust for myself, a disgust I thought MICHAEL LACY I'd left behind in childhood. So I pleasured myself again in my dirty rotten lean-to (so as to banish the foolish self-condemnation), but it only worsened. All the night the hollows grumbled, anxious and inquiet. At birth we knock on the door of the Once again in the morning I tried my world, requesting admission through our hand at the oar, but pangs of guilt were cries. We are met, hopefully, by the welcomall I conceived. By noon we'd arrived at ing voices of our parents, the authors of our our destination. In a clearing of enormous being, as we move from darkness to light trees we found a city of brick, three acres of and receive nurturance. Our parents model civilization in this godforsaken jungle. We and mediate in a priestly fashion the tender came upon a young man called Campbell. loving care of God as they collaborate in this He was baby-faced teenager from new creative endeavor. The gymnasium at St. John's College, a school called Deerfield, and it was a damn fine sight to see a known for 100 years as Iglehart Hall, is both pair of slacks and a tie. "Get a temple of the body and a wise and loving lost out there, did you?" He mother. We are enfolded in her loving emsaid with an appeasing brace as we enter her halls, shoes reverently smile. "Home safe now. removed so that we may ingest her milk of Say, are you a February amletic joy. We beckon her with our huntransfer?" I wasn't sure gry cries in the form of squeaking sneakers \. what he meant by it, and bouncing basketballs. We feel her beand I paused before I nevolent downward gaze through the eyes of answered, long enough the scoreboard. Behold the light! Temple Iglehart has a high priest who to see two men sitting on a bench, wearing presides over worship activities and serves dark coats and hats, each as mediator between the human and the peering over newspapers Divine. The guiding masculine energy of Mr. Leo Pickens, the Holy See, stands in imat me. "Sure am," I lied. I quickly picked up what peccable dynamic balance with the essential I could about this place, un- matriarchal energy of the Temple. Mr. Picksure of why I was pretending ens trusts his acolytes to oversee the majority to belong. This was some of Temple activities, but it is his ecclesiastisort of educational out- cal duty to officiate the most sacred worship post on the edge of the activity of all, occurring in the Holy of HoWestern Territory. Mostly lies, that activity being basketball. One of the wonders of sport is that evcollege students, professors, ... and even just anthropo- ery moment of every contest, unscripted as logical amateurs set up base they are, contains the seeds of almost limcamp here and take expedi- itless beginnings. Sport, and basketball is Your Mother is Calling r _, �a prime example, is a continuous creative effort, every moment giving birth to a new reality. In this activity, we are feeding others as well as being fed. Through our play we are at once newborn, parent and priest as we collaborate with the creative, nurturing impulse of the Divine. Athletic joy lies not in the acquisition of success, narrowly defined as winning games or gaining the praise of men. The joy resides in the thrusting of one's whole self into the unknown to experience the bursting of artificial boundaries. This requires trust, a faith. We must trust the game, trust our teammates, trust our competitors, and trust the righmess of the pursuit. As we do this with focused effort and self-abandon, we commune with a higher power which then redefines the self. This requires courage which few possess. For the many, sport is entertainment - a fun diversion from other activities, or possibly a way to serve their vainglorious desires. But for the few, it becomes a revelation. Those valorous few are more likely seen on the men's basketball "B" teams or as members of the Kunai, but let us all partake. In this we may all be Guardians, GreenWaves, Hustlers, Druids and Spartans: that is, Protectors, Nurturers, Providers, Priests and Warri BLEE BARKS ors. Ask Anyone This hell smells awful - of gut cancer and poisoned fruit. My toes fester. My wind sweats. I have the most vivid dreams. Last night, backstage, while filling a pocket of milk with my uncle's marbles, the cat's eye rolled back. I prefer the expected. I'd imagined more space. As this bright splinter, locked beneath its glassy wave, flipped softly distant, the room flowered blue like the bottom of a well, drowned man's blue. Sky is blue in a bright flat way. I yearned for a grove of ilex, cooled by the breath of stone ... I woke - was it midnight or morning? Loitering tapers cast the only dull gleam - in an airless vault, to the beating of birds' wings. Some foul paste, mingled with down, rimed my teeth. My fist held a sparrow, lifeless. My pockets spilled wings, stiff, and at the joint, gristly. I, once the boast and marvel of the fields, am today not even my own ghost. Expert, how can I end this mockery of a life? -Bobo, GI Dear Bobo, Zbigniew Herbert has a poem titled "Apollo and Marsyas," which myth, it just so happens, forms the subject of a forthcoming concept album, "Tang," from freak folk supergroup Axpert Onion, with After the Beep Records. The real duel of Apollo with Marsyas (absolute ear versus immense range) takes place in the evening when as we already know the judges have awarded victory to the god bound tight to a tree meticulously stripped of his skin Marsyas howls before the howl reaches his tall ears he reposes in the shadow of that howl shaken by a shudder of disgust Apollo is cleaning his instrument only seemingly is the voice of Marsyas monotonous and composed of a single vowel Aaa in reality Marsyas relates the inexhaustable wealth of his body bald mountains of liver white ravines of aliment rustling forests of lung sweet hillocks of muscle joints bile blood and shudders the wintry wind of bone over the salt of memory shaken by a shudder of disgust Apollo is cleaning his instrument now to the chorus is joined the backbone of Marsyas in principle the same A only deeper with the addition of rust this is already beyond the endurance of the god with nerves of artificial fibre along a gravel path hedged with box the victor departs wondering whether out of Marsyas' howling there will not some day arise a new kind of art - let us say - concrete suddenly at his feet falls a petrified nightingale he looks back and sees that the hair of the tree to which Marsyas was fastened is white completely (Milosz & P.D. Scott, transl.) Henneneutai, you are Marsyas. The following is dishonest. The riotous piping of your stiff aulos has attracted Truth's cruelty. He peels away your skin so that you may know fire in a soft breeze. Fear not, Bobo. You will die. But see what Order's vengeance gave you. As the story goes, Marsyas won the first round of this musical competition, as judged by the Muses. In round two, however, Apollo flipped his lyre. This a flautist cannot do. While Harmony, reversed or inverted, remains tranquilly himself, smiles and tears spring unbalanced. So Apollo wins, but Symmetry demands a third round, a duet. With the strings of his lyre, Apollo flays Marsyas, drawing sound from the satyr's lungs. Under Apollo's direction, the satyr so exceeds himself that Nature dies with his song. Marsyas dissolved was transfigured into a tributary of the Hellespont. Thus his acute sensitivity to existence both subjects the world to his mortality and draws her ceaseless change into himself. Bobo, just be you. CAROLYN ZELIKOW THE GADFLY, FEBRUAR Y 201 0 7 �THE QUAD Confidenliality al SI. John's-II of Ill An interview with Jerry Januszewski. by Brandon Carney, Class of 2012 Brandon Camey: Can you describe your role at the college? Jerry Januszewski: The college had a counseling staff before I got here, but my particular background was in substance abuse treaunent, addiction treatment, and chemical dependency treatment. It seemed like a good idea to have someone on the staff who had more of a background in alcohol and drug issues. So my job is to see people for any reason but in particular when those problems pop up. Plus, I'm supposed to be involved with any kind of effort to do education or prevention, to bring the conversation about substances to the surface. BC: So you view yourself as more of a aid for students as opposed to an administrator? JJ: Oh, yeah. BC: Can you describe your policy on confidentiality? JJ: All of the normal rules that govern therapeutic relationships apply to me here as with the other counselors with just a couple of exceptions-when someone's a hann to themselves or can actually harm somebody else. Other than that, the only time yoli could ever speak outside of that relationship is if they ask you to. Sometimes that's the case. People have gotten in trouble at the school, and then, I guess, the administrators suggest Strongly that they come talk to me and they [the administrators] want to be informed if they [the students] did and the -outcome of that. On several occasions someone has come in here in hot water or something and we have a conversation and I'm told by them to report back to the Assistant Dean that they were h ere and whether I assess them as having a dependency problem. BC: So you're only required to report back to the Assistant Dean if the student is sent here by the Assistant Dean? JJ: I'm not required to unless the person wants me to, and that's between them and the assistant dean. So if they think it's in they're best interest for me to report back 8 TH E GADFL Y FEB RU , ARY 2010 to the assistant dean then I'm happy to do that, but as far as I'm concerned there's no requirement. Anyone who walks in here, no one in the whole world needs to know they're here. BC: Do you think that the students who ask you to report back to the Assistant Dean assume that your report is going to help their situations with the Assistant Dean? JJ: Yes, I think that's the assumption, and I think it generally does do that. They're trying to comply with what the school's saying. This is where it gets a little weird for me, though- the punitive thing that they're dealing with. I'm not really that as far as I'm concerned. I'm a help part, a therapeutic part. But a person could very easily come in here thinking "I've got to do this to please the Assistant Dean, so I have to make sure he tells the Assistant Dean that I'm here." There's nothing I can do about that, but as far as I'm concerned, as long as they're here, we'll make it productive. BC: Do you think it's a detriment to your effectiveness that the Assistant Dean does send students to you and asks them to have you report back to her about them? JJ: That's a good question because in the whole addiction treatment world, people come all the time under duress-in fact, almost nobody comes there happily. It's been a big question over the years, do you have better outcomes if people come voluntarily or because they're going to get fired or whatever. The answer to that, I think, is that it doesn't matter if they come under duress. In fact, sometimes the people that come with the m ost resistance do better because once they see that this is actually a healthy environment, their defenses can fall away. counselor." It doesn't always have to be me unless it's substance related. My understanding is that it's never, "If you don't do this, you're out." BC: What would you say the ratio of those who are sent to you is to the total number of students you see? JJ: Let's see, I saw twenty students this week, [of those,] maybe two. Very few actually, and again, I wouldn't say that they were sent. They have choices. I think they're required to do community service. That's a requirement, but I don't think this is exactly that. My understanding, in fact, when I got hired- it was a different Assistant Dean-was that "No, we're not going require them to come see you, but they will, probably, because they'll know that we want them to, even though we're not saying 'You have to."' So anyway, it's relatively few, and those are not ones I see for very long- maybe three or four sessions. We have enough time to sort through their feelings about substance abuse, their history of that, where is it in their lives, what benefits does it provide. That's the tack I take: 'What are the benefits of the way you're doing it now, what are the disadvantages? What would be the advantages and disadvantages of stopping or cutting it down?" To work through that it takes probable a couple times. If I think that somebody has a addiction problem, that I will report. Otherwise, if they don't, I'll say to the Assistant Dean, "So and so came" and I won't go into any detail. But if there is an addiction problem, I'll go into some detail. I'll tell her, "I think this person needs stronger intervention." It's purely for the good of that person. BC: What about the requirement that they have you report back to the Assistant Dean? BC: If students knew that on your advise, a student could be forced to take a semester off to get that help, do you think that they would confide in you as much as they do? JJ: JJ: I don't think that it's a requirement. My understanding is that it's n ever, ''You have to do this," it's more like, "If you want deal effectively with the trouble you're now in, it's highly advisable that you go speak to a Well, it's not n ecessarily true that it would require a semester off. T h ere are ways to get treatment an d work it out with school. It's not easy. But yeah, sure, I'm that even those who are telling me the truth are �holding things back. It's very rare for someone with a problem like that to walk in and tell someone the whole truth. Even if they're telling you pretty brutally true things, it's the nature of that problem that they're kind of holding back. So I'm assuming when someone's telling me what's going on with them, there's probably more to be told. I'm easily deceived, someone could lie to me. I'm sorry for that situation because that person's going to suffer more. But I'm sure it happens that someone will think "I've got to fool this counselor because I don't want any more trouble from the school." [... ]* BC: So you're saying that people that come in here and tell you the truth might have to deal with consequences that people that come in here and lie to you don't have to deal with? JJ: That's too hard to say. People come in here totally voluntarily, having no problem with the school, to talk about their substance issue, and some of them I've advised to deal with the bigger problem of their substance abuse. But I'm not going to tell anybody, it's up to them to deal with it. I would never talk to the administration unless that person sitting in that chair asked me to. [... r BC: Do you view the assistant dean and the other administrators as aids for students as opposed to disciplinarians? JJ: I'm really impressed with that here. They are the administrators and I am on the help side. I am not part of the discipline process directly- indirectly I suppose. But even so, I think that they have a very high degree of desire to help. That's my observation. [... ]* BC: How do you think that the students see you and the administrators? Do you think di.at the students associate you with the administrators? How do you think that the students view the assistant dean? JJ: My hope, for myself, is that they see me entirely on the help side. I feel like I'm getting that kind of feedback. If people feel differently, they haven't told me. I would love to know. The other part of that question- the administrators- I don't have a clue really. That's one reason that I'm trying to work up a way that we can do sort of a survey of the student body, to really hear their thought on these things. [... ]* If I can get my way on this I'd like to have a survey tl1at we can do every year near the end of the school year so we can see students' opinions on this as they go through tli.e college. [... ]* ~ *Parts of this interview have been edited for length. {POHi} ALAUD FROM ABROAD TO WHAT'S MOD ON THE QUAD Th.ere once was a Johnnie named Grace Who stayed outside all of her days But one cold night after seminar There was so much snow she said "blarg." "Away with this nonsense, this tired blase- _ said the indubitable reknowned Ms. Hovey, 0 "If we \\·ant to be warm and want to smoke too, - v.-e must find .a way to make an igloo.""Fine," Grace said, with a bow and a smirk She wasn't quite sure how they \\"ould-get all the work But otT1ers came w110 dwelt outdoors The \\·all grew tall and they built a capstoned door. That night they kept vigil in the snow and the sweat Taking short rests and using all the work they could get, They labored for hours, managed their slaves And when morn approached they realized they were safe. For the walls had bee11 built up, o so high And the ceiling was covered so that you couldn't see the sl)·. Mats -they took, from all the dorms So that they could sit on the ground and still be warm. _"There's an igloo on the quad," I said, The aext morning upon getting up from_ bed. No other schools would do this Or if they tried it would be hit -0r miss. But right in front of me _stood the proud igloo And on -rop a brilliant pirate flag flew Inside sat Grace enjoying the 1.\'annth And savori1rg smoking as \\"as her norm. "I have preserved my way of life," quoth she For she th-inks a smoker she must always be What magnificent marvels people do When they think favorite pastimes they will lose! - Virginia Earl:i_ Class of 2Q13 "Everything for the Smoker" Tel: 410-263-2066 Fax: 410-263-4647 56 Maryland Avenue Annapolis , Maryland 21401 shop@smokeshopusaltd.com THE GI Df l Y, f EBRU ARY 2010 9 �W Reviewed by J. Keenan Trotter St. John's is something of a religion for grown-ups familiar with-but not actually graduates of-the College. They love this school so much! They love it because they can't believe in the Ivy League (so much class resentment!). They love it because they can't believe in liberal arts colleges (so much godlessness!). They love it because they can't even believe in state universities (so much drinking!). All of which leaves contemporary grown-ups hoping for something realer and truer than the swaths of crime, sin, and mediocrity that constitute their conception of American education. I suspect this attendant nausea elicited by modern education ("Get Your Degree in Massage Therapy Today!") is why Roger Martin, in the autumn of 2004, at the age of sixty-one, came to St. John's College. His semester-long experience here led to the writing of his memoir entitled Racing Odysseus: A College President Becomes a Freshman Again (California, $24.95). To start off on the right foot, let's be clear: that subtitlewhich suggests that Martin, who used to be the president of Randolph-Macon College, in North Carolina, actually enrolled in St. John's as a freshman-is totally untrue. What he did was audit a seminar (in which he was not allowed to speak) for less than a semester. Nevertheless he decided to join the St. John's crew team, practicing five days a week, two hours per day. Roger Martin spent more time rowing a boat the he did discussing Homer. The problems with Martin's book begin early on, in a scene where his wife is encouraging him to finish the first reading of the year-the first six books of the Iliad. He writes: "Susan is making me feel guilty. Only a 1a THE 6ADFlY, FEBRUARY 2010 month previously Chris Nelson, the presihat chokes Racing Odysseus in the end dent of St. John's College, and Harvey Flauis its total embrace of sentimentality. menhaft, the school's dean,. had agreed to For some reason Martin attends freshlet me enter their institution as a freshman man orientation, which he appears to have so that I could write about the first-year ex- graced just so he could write about it. Oh perience from a student's perspective." dear! Look at the upperclassmen! ("They Alright, first of all, Martin didn't enter St. own St. John's, and the freshmen intuitively John's as a freshman. Again: He sat on the know this.") Look at the staff! ("You idiot," periphery of one seminar two days a week he thinks a staff member named Joy is telland proceeded to dawdle around campus, as ing him, apparently with the expression on he details in the following chapters. If Roger her face. "IDs are for real students, not for a Martin is a "freshman" writing about his sixty-one-year-old college president pretend"first-year experience" then I'm the United ing to be one.") Look at the surroundings! States Secretary of Education writing about (Martin states the first stanza of "The Starmy trip to Mars. Spangled Banner" is engraved on the walls Second of all, with his wife by his side of the Francis Scott Key Auditorium-a deand his refusal to live on campus (or, for tail he mentions not once but twice. Um, that matter, bother with the three other it's painted.) full-time classes actual St. Martin's narrative is John's freshmen attend) it shot through with imseems less and less clear why portant-seeming rememMartin decided his memoir brances of his freshman necessitated St. John's as a year at Denison Univerbackdrop. (In the prologue, sity, in Ohio, where Large amounts of hijinks took he illuminates the fact that he was diagnosed with melaplace. These recollections noma four years before comform the sustaining force ing to the College. Which is of Racing Odysseus. Resad, of course, but otherwise membering them needn't totally unconnected to whathave necessitated Martin's ever he's doing at St. John's.) appropriation of St. John's (its culture and its curricuMoments later, as Martin considers the Ihad's plot, lum) for his own ends. he's distracted by an NBC The . day after orientareport from the extant war tion, when Martin is inRacing Odysseus: A College President in Iraq, an interruption to troduced to class of 2008, Becomes A Freshman Again he stands up. "My name is Martin's enjoyment of the Roger H. Martin Olympic Games: Roger Martin," he begins, "It then dawns on me. "and while in real life I am UNIVERSrIY OF CA!.rFoRNIA PRBSS The Iliad, written 2, 700 a college president, I am years ago, is as much about joining you this semester my world as it is about Homer's. Like the an- as a freshman. Well, not really a freshman. cient Greeks, America can also play Olym- But I plan to write about the freshman expepic games in the middle of a war. I wonder rience, and I hope to get to know as many what else I might learn about my own times of you as I can." from this ancient literature. Will the materiThe "really" fluoresces. What does it al suggest nothing ever changes in the world mean to really be a freshman? If he thinks that continues to be defined by human mis- we are to take his wisdom at face value-that ery and suffering? Or will I find hope that all it is to be a freshman at St. John's College somehow the human spirit can overcome is occasional reading and maybe rowing a the past and that a world free of war might bit-then he's not just mistaken; he's a fraud. Why did Martin deny himself almost evbe possible in my lifetime?" That's quite a paragraph, and we don't ery opportunity a St. John's freshman has to have any particular reason to not take Mar- utterly fail in front of his peers and teachers? tin for his word. A word which basically asks This is the biggest flaw of the book. Martin to us to believe he instanteously formulates allows himself to use the loaded language parallels between antiquity and modernity. of "becoming a freshman" without incurGiven the frequency of things "dawning" on ring the appropriate cost to himself. Being Martin (once every couple of pages, usually), a freshman is about failing, over and over it's difficult to believe these reckonings even again; yet Martin contrived to make sure happened with the clarity and the spontane- he would never be able to fail. (His failures ity Martin would like us to be persuaded by. while rowing, while gut-wrenching, aren't �exactly the failures I'm talking about.) And the fact that the administration at the time ren1ained con1plicit in lviartin's agree1nentit's unclear why Martin is forbidden from speaking in seminar-is particularly strange. Freshn1an year is dedicated to really leami~g what it is you actually feel and d1ink about knowledge, love, sex, war, death, will, destiny, politics, and more. A.nd to deny oneself the primary mode of communication-the literal act of ralking-isn'r only weird. It's disdainful. I would be lying if I said Racing Odysseus is completely. wor~hles·~· 1;fartin has a keen e~e for peculiar details \One tut0r apparentiy uses three translations of the Iliad during seminar) and maintains an openness about the failures of his own youth that stir in the reader a kind of low-level sympathy. It's difficult, though, to mesh his ambivalence \Vith the American college experience with the fakery of the one his own book is based upon. artin's suspending plot is quite weak. It struggles to braid his various personas into a cohesive story. You have Martin the cancer survivo;:, Martin the "student", Martin the rower, Martin the college president, Martin the eighteen-yearold Denison student. Martin doesn't help himself by likening himself, without irony, to Odysseus (thus the title), Achilles, even Herodotus. I can see why he came here: the sense of legitirn.acy that St. John's dispenses gives his book the necessary testosterone~ (Otherwise his Cliff Notes-esque retellings of major works of philosophy and history just wouldn't make sense, would they?) I don 1t think Martin needed us as n1uch as he thought. He obviously possesses his ov.-n library of heartbreaking memories (his father, who went to Yale, pressured lviartin to attend, but Martin knew he didn't have the requisite grades) and the kind perspective rejection and engagements with death deliver to theiT survivors. Despite Martin's emotional repertoire, his book is a failure of tone. He seems almost deaf the subtleties that color human existence, irony in particular. This rneans Manin feels every incident must produce a take--avv"ay, a lirtle saying to ·wTap up the day. Here are some of them: Martin on his life: "The great battles of my life are in the past, and I am wondering what my journey will be like before I arrive at my final destination." Martin on education: "I think that the spirit of the St. John 1s Progran1 [... ] is <.vell worth being emulated by all of us." Martin on r0Vv i:ng: Ro>A.ring is becon1ing a n1etaphor for my life. [... ] But if I just let go, if I -ease up a bit, I might enjoy life a bit more. " Martin on his life, again: "Like Odysseus, I arn. on a perilous journey, full of fonnidable challenges and quixotic adventures." Martin on Plato: "What they are learning from Plato, of course, is chat life doesn't always offer up clear or easy answers." Martin on himself: "I am becorning a fixture at St. John's." 1\1artin on a student he 1neets: 11 Henry is a c.l.i.aracter." Martin on an adult he n1eets: 'Tm glad I accepted Mary's invitation." Martin on a student: "Maia is not only a great coxswain, but an honorable one as well." Marrin on education policy: "Nationally, we are not doing as well as we should in the area of science and math education, but St. John's GTeat Books curriculuE1 is at least one positive response to this challenge." /\.nd so on. Martin clearly has something to say about SL John's College, perhaps as a metaphor for education or today's young people. But this is a faulty transaction for the reader: the most that ever happens plotwise (or anything-wise) at SL John's is Martin catching a crab or otherwise messing up during crew practice. The actual drama happened more than forty years prior, at Denison. This switch destroys Martin's purported seriousness about the endeavor of human life, existence, even failure. (~'hen he s rowing he's not really rowing but-he actually says this-continuing the tradition set forth by the soldiers in The Peioponnesian War.) The whole book comes off as false and tinny. I really wanted Martin to actually be a freshman-to experience for himself the heartbreak, the depression, and the failure that is one's first year here. Instead, he finds \i\'."ays to excuse himself frcn1 even really trying to live like one of us. Martin settles for the simulacrum, accepting invitations to adult dinner parties, living off campus, and eschewing ~hree of the four (or five, if you count chorus, which indeed he also missed) classes. So did Racing Odysseus reap the accolades of publications like the Times Literary Supp!ernent? Because it's Chicken Soup for the Academic SouL When someone like a college president (or professor) realizes his or her life lacks the drama and the danger of the thinkers he studies-v:n:iters and philosophers uncozied by the academy, unprotected from the lives of those around them-he ·writes a 1 11 0 JOCKS ff THE WEEK Miss Hahn and Mr. Bonn THE OHFLV, ftBRUHY 2Q1Q 11 �This week I tried a little experiment to see if people would respond via email to the following question: in one sentence, what is your idea/opinion of Johnnie fashion? Analyzing the (smallish) bevy of responses I got, I found that the question was a better litmus test for the responder's sense of humor than anything else. Judge for yourself: "Johnnie fashion is predictably uninfom1ed. Mismatched shoes and day-sequins are the new wave of the cutting-edge." Paul Morrill "To be recognized as Johnnie fashion, as opposed to USNA or Annapolitan fashion, one must include at least one of the following in their accessories: any wearable SJC logo item, one or more suitably esoteric and dog-eared tomes (known as "great books"), or unusual headgear (such as a bowler, deer stalker, or Mongolian winter hat)." -Jerome "Dausman Primo" Dausman "One might do well to reflect upon Diana Vreeland's reputed observation, "pink is the navy blue of India." -Patricia M. Locke, tutor "Johnnie fashion was designed and marketed by Amanda Macdonald (fonnerly class of 2012), reaping a hefty profit, but it turns out she stole it all from designer guru and secret celebrity hoarder Lindsanity Shoe-han, so she had to flee SJC and go into hiding. She's probably in Australia now, but you didn't hear it from me ... " -Anne Geitz "The outside matches the inside."Campbell "Nothin doin." -Ina Dixon "Fashion?" -Mr. Verdi, tutor "Classic + sassy = eccentric. :) I'm happy that I see so many used clothes-I guess you could say St. John's styles are good for the environment." -Katie K. Christensen, Communications Specialist/Web and Publications "I love the latest goat look, but please trim your groins people."-Chris Johns Though these quotations-like fashion on this campus-wildly differ, I can draw only one definite conclusion: like, two people check their St. John's email on a regular basis. No matter. I have my own opinions about the garbed gargoyles that slink around campus in their tweedy wintertime smoking jackets and little plaid flap skirts, placidly puffing on their meerschaum and clicking their leather oxfords. Poor Evelyn Waugh; he would have never written Brideshead Revisited if he knew his influence on modern liberal arts student fashion would greatly eclipse his contribution to literature. But perhaps I shouldn't get ahead of myself. When I floated the idea of an article about Johnnie fashion in the last Gadfly meeting, there was a collective sharp intake of breath. It's a well-known fact: a Gadfly columnist who pursues the "fashion article" idea might as well sling a moldy albatross around her neck and call it a day. It's the reason why St. John's decided to open Santa Fe; people who attempted such a doomed task needed a place to cloister themselves for a few years until the dander died dmvn. In fact, I can think of only a few more taboos at St. John's that would be worse than writing an article about fashion, such as tackling Euclid for your freshman essay, choosing Heidegger's Being and Time or a Sartre work for your senior essay topic, or crying about your personal life in your seminar/oral/don rag. Come to think of it, I can generate fifty more things that would totally suck if they happened to you here whether you willed it or not. Let's just say that writing an article on fashion is up there. For example, after I tossed out the idea in the meeting, I spent a day in my room reeling from being called "anti-reason" and "retarded." But I still maintain my right to vvrite about Johnnie fashion. Along with the idiosyncrasies that afflict those strong enough to make it four years through the Program, the clothes on campus define us in more ways than we might admit. Think about our next door neighbors-Our Nation's Finest Hope and Joy-the midshipmen. Those strapping, fiercely intelligent young men have been wearing uniforms for centuries now. During the summer and early fall, the pristine outlines of their dress whites dot the red brick backdrop of Annapolis like white blood cells in a bloodstream. They, in their antiseptic uniformity, are denied the pleasure of expression and individuality. Here's my opinion about the matter: "creative" clothing at St. John's presents a contrast to the starched middies who goosestep around this little city, but by no means did the Naval Academy produce our quirkiness. Let me expose my heresy: it is The Program that causes the fashion choices on campus. Without this freedom to turn to our external trappings to satisfy our desperate need for individuality, we would turn into monochromatic automatons who read the same books and talk about the same subjects. When I leave St. John's, my brain may bear vague impressions of the categorical imperative and theories about monads, but it will always remember the overwhelming images of the St. John's Intramural T-Shirt saturated with overtones of rolled tobacco second-hand smoke, body odor, and some brand of beer usually with the word "Natural" in it. I wi.ll remember Stacey Quadmonger and Kitty Backtalk, sniveling about the latest color schemes found in American Apparel, or all of those horrific choices I've made in seminar that ended up distracting DODD ON THE QUAD The Form of Johnnie BY KIRSTIE DODD myself and others. Who could forget the jangly charm bracelet of Augustine's Confessions, gold and black S&C cocktail dress of Metaphysics, and the unsupported, low-cut camisole of a Spinoza seminar? I'm not saying these nightmares taught me more than that night's reading's discussion, but they did highlight how clothing means more to humans than mere utility. After watching fashion on this campus for about four years now, the array astonishes me. I find that the commentary would take a long, serialized edition of Dodd on the Quad-at least 8-10 articles-because of the variety. Think about it: SJC thug cuJ... ture, hipster coumre, the "oddballs," the staunch, proud kilt-wearers, that one guy that insists he dresses like Scrooge from A Christmas Carol (even in warm weather), the New England preppies, the slobs-all would need some serious lip service. I don't have the energy to undertake such a project, nor do I have the cajones to withstand the complaints if I decide to be critical of a particular style. And besides, when it comes to fashion, I have no leg to stand on. .,.._ K1RSTIF Dorm, Editor-in-Chief, Elizabeth Spagnolctti, ]uniar Editor; J. Keenan Trotter, Design Editor; lviarin Skokandic, Business Manager; Noah Litvin, Graphic Artist; Jack Neill. Spot~; l..¥dia Boo:z and /\nnika Schwiebert, Editorial Interns; Brandon Camey, John Blechl, Elsabe Dixon, Virginia Eady, Nora Edge, Michael Lacy, Susan LaRocca, Dave Maher, Maggie Mohr, Christopher Nelson, Sasha Serebryannik, Ri~ ley Spic.er, Carolyn Zdikow, Contributors. FoLJN'DED in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly di.-mibuted to ow:r 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus. Opinions exprt!$Sed within are. the sole responsibility of the author(s). The Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit subrnissions in any \\."aY necessary to publish the most profes.sional, informative, and thought-provoking ne\7>'spaper whid-1 circumstances at St. John's permit. LETTERS of 200 word_.; or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted v.ill be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. Tu GM.fly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circu1nsr<mces. THE GADFLY meets every Friday at 7 PM in rhe iower level of the Barr-Buchana..'1 Ll:nter. _l\u. .<1.RTIO.ES are due at 11:59 PM on Thursdays. 12 m rnm, Hmm 2010 � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 12 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXII, Issue 2 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2010-02 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXII, Issue 2 of The Gadfly. Published February 2010. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 32.2 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/cf6c4fb4c6fccdb7cceec546f1082c92.pdf e8d31986e2dea9aa35e351a40a9d81d1 PDF Text Text E E �I have neither read the column by Miss. Gold, nor did I read the initial negative response(s) to [a previous issue of The Gad. fly] likening it to Cosmo. I did, however, read and would like to take issue with the responses to the initial negative reaction. So, I guess I'd be categorized as anti-anti-anti-sex-column, for those who need to fix their ene1nies in place. As far as I could figure out, the anti-anti-sex-column responses expressed the opinion that free expression, especially at our dear college, should be defended. And of course we would all agree with this principle, in principle. But is the free expression in question worthy of decent and intelligent, thinking individuals? Those who'd hide behind Socrates in defending the open airing of sexual issues on campus-please show some class before enlisting such a giant for any cause, people-should remember that he had no patience for certain views regarding sexuality, classifying them as fit only for galley slaves. Correct? Well, then, are we going to accept that any discussion of anything regarding sex is elevating and enlightening, appropriate to our college? Or shouldn't we rather realize that it could also be degrading? Again, I didn't read the original piece, which occasioned this debate, but if its nature was along the lines of "How do I get these stains out of my sheets?" "Which positions are best for toning abs?" or "Will oral sex make my teeth whiter?" then I think the answer is clear: we're in galley slave territory. There are many, surely, who by psychological or moral necessity must believe that any criticism of any sexual conduct, or of the discussion thereof, is the result of closed-mindedness, prudery, bigotry, "sour grapes," or some combination of such pathologies. Such people I'm not going to bother addressing. But to you others, despite my sympathy with the criticism of anything in these pages at 2 THE GADFLY, FEBRUARY 2010 all resembling the content or tone of Cosmo, I'd like to show my sincere acceptance of open discussion about matters sexual by proposing my own list of possible sexual issues to be examined. Some of you may have heard of Camille Paglia. I hope so; she's an original thinker and keen observer. In the aftermath of the Virginia Tech massacre (one of the reasons the murderer gave for his hatred of his peers was their promiscuity), she remarked that sex at colleges is ubiquitous and highly un-erotic. Of course, most people, and even most college students, have no idea what "erotic" could possibly mean except for "of or pertaining to sex," so her observation would make no sense at all. But Johnnies should understand; so maybe some of you who are so eager to shine light on sex at St. John's could discuss whether her observation is true here, and if so, then why? Is the common experience of sex here a rapturous transcending, even momentarily, of our condition as confused men and women of the 21st century, or is it rather a mechanical satisfaction of appetite? Would we agree with the modem psychoanalyst that modem man is in flight from Eros, and that sex is the vehicle for that flight? Or take this question. The data from more than a few studies suggest that sexual activity (at least pre-marital), especially among young women, does not correlate positively with satisfaction with life. You'd think the people who get the most sex would be the happiest, but that's not so at all. Why not? You who are so proud of being sexually active, why are you sometimes, if not often, empty and sad after sex? Why do married women in traditionalist sub-cultures (Orthodox Jews, evangelical Christians, etc.) routinely rate their sex lives as more satisfying than do the Sex-and-the-City types? Or if psychological and sociological analyses aren't your taste, then consider simply the purely physical and biological dimension. Why is it that sex, after all, is rather odd, if not in some of its features, downright gross? Why are the organs we use to copulate the same we use to urinate? And why are we, or so many of us, so fixated on each others' rear ends, like dogs? Is there some message that's been encoded-whether by God or by Darwin, take your pick-in the aspects of sexuality, which make for such good jokes? And why do so many men in sub-Saharan Africa, for instance, seem to feel, much to the dismay ofWestem gogooders who believe that the best way to help the poor of the world is to keep them from procreating and feel strongly, that to wrap one's male parts in plastic is symbolic and in a way very shameful? Is it because they're uncivilized, ignorant savages, who don't realize the surpassing glory of condoms? Or should we all stop and think whether taking such a bizarre step as a prelude to some activity might cause us to doubt that activity's worth? Should taking drugs to prevent a result which is a sign of health (conceiving a child through sex shows that the body's working properly, however inconveniently for us, right?) also give us pause? I highly doubt these were the sorts of questions Miss Gold or her defenders want to be considered, however loud their assertions of open dialogue. But I'd be happy for them to prove me wrong. Greg Yatarola Graduate Student ' At the risk of running the conversation into the ground, I feel the need to respond to the recent flurry of responses on Ms. Gold's sex column. I'm not sure that the argument ever left the ground, or that it was not run into the ground from the get-go, but I want to contribute anyway. To begin with:· I agree that sex and sexuality should be openly discussed on campus. If anyone, including Ms. Gold, wishes to do so in the press, more power to him or her. However, I believe that such a discussion should be pertinent to the community in a way that it is informative, thoughtful, and mature. I do not believe it should be the author's attempt to display pseudo-psychological insight into the nature of sexual positions, which is how I felt Ms. Gold's article came off. As it was her first article, though, I'm willing to give her the benefit of the doubt and see what more she has to write. I hope that she, or anyone else who steps up to the pitcher's plate of sex columnist, would have something particular to offer the St. John's communitysomething that reprinting Dan Savage's "Savage Love" column could not. For those of you unfamiliar with his column, I recommend it. Paul Morrill Senior In response to the published comments of ''.A Johnnie" in [a] previous issue, I would like to take this opportunity to thank her (or, more unlikely, him). I came to St. John's thinking that people would take carefully consider each individual particular case before making a generalization or stereotype of the whole. She (or he) has proven me incorrect. Logan Dwyer Sophomore Dear Anonymous, You have been writing to me a lot. I really appreciate the cryptic postcard you left at my door and the letters you submit to the Gadfly. Really, it's great. Continue doing so. There's just one problem. Your version of anonymity is cowardly. If you are going to write anonymously, you can do it A) to protect yourself from physical harm, B) as a way to say anything you want, as long as you leave clues so that we can figure out your true identity �(like hide and seek, it's only fun if you are found), or the strangest of all C) humility, as in you have non-offensive, good ideas but don't want credit for thein. You are none of these. Or I guess D) you are the Zodiac. You're not that either. You, my dear Anonymous, have both praised (kind of) and criticized (definitely) me for openly expressing my opinions. Unlike you, however, I am not hiding behind a mask I intend always to wear. I treat you as an equal, not an unknowable variable. I may disrespect you in my writings, but at least I honor you enough to make myself your willing target for criticism. Please continue to shoot at me, but at least do it from where I can see you. Anonymous Jr. Freshman FANGYPASTA The following is a recipe that can be prepared in Randall dining hall. Take several (6-12, depending on size) pieces of artichoke and 4 baby tomatoes from the salad bar Grill on the panini press While you wait for the vegetables, get a bowl of pasta from the vegetarian bar Add one spoon black olives, one spoon parrnesean cheese (Optional: bacon broken up from sandwich bar) Add grilled vegetab les, mix together. - Laurel Fischer Senior Penis! Vagina! Why They're Dominating the Conversation "Yeah, I mean I hooked up with him but we didn't have sex or anything." ii. How many times have you heard this? Or worse yet, said it? I know I've been guilty of it, and I know I've heard it from lots of people-including Johnnies. But what does it mean? I discovered last year that, at least among certain freshman, hooking up might mean nothing more than making out. But often, it extends to acts like mutual masturbation and oral sex: But that's not sex. Weird! I am going to lay down a simple, inclusive definition of sex. Sex is a group activity involving two or more persons that results in orgasms or, at least, intends to do so. How's that sound? It encompasses a variety of activities with varying levels of risk. Phone sex? Yeah, that counts. Oral sex? Yup. I don't really understand what the big deal is about putting a penis in a vagina. What is that more special than putting it in a mouth or a butt? Further, I don't know why it matters more if you put a penis in a vagina rather than a tongue or fingers. The real difference is that it is only by putting a penis in a vagina that the vagina-bearer can get pregnant. That is, it carries a greater risk for those who do not want to become pregnant. I understand that by saying that -"I don't understand the fuss" I am playing dumb to some extent. Culturally, the idea that sex is something that happens between a man and a woman is pervasive. Lots of religious institutions reject anything other than monogamous heterosexuality as being sacrilegious, and assert that the function of copulation is not pleasure but procreation. Which is good if all you want to do is get married and dutifully produce more of your people, and, if you're Jewish, my parents will be very happy that you are making more Jewish babies because I sure as hell am not helping that cause. Yet most Johnnies who are having sex aren't married and are not planning to make babies. Hence the importance of contraception; hence the piles of condoms in the health center, both lubricated and unlubricated! (Pro-tip: the latter are better for oral sex, since they do not taste quite as gross.) So, even with the concession that there are cultural/religious messages informing our sensibilities, we're still having sex for fun. I'm still not getting the PN (penisin-vagina) emphasis. The other problem with PIV sex is the focus on the, well, penis. Non-PN acts don't "count" because they don't involve a penis. I'm not going to go into some second-wave feminist rant about the penis (or even the phallus) as being an inherent source of male privilege (or whatever) but we definitely value the penis as being more important than the vagina. Those detestable rags like Cosmo (or whatever) are very glad to have ·articles about sex that contain nothing other than unimaginative tips on how to increase Your Man's Pleasure, whereas the few tips for the women are like, try moaning; he'll think you're really enjoying it! Given the numbers of women who report they never or seldom reach orgasm, it's not like there's a glut of information on the market. Maybe if we start considering all sexual acts to acrually be sex instead of some weird sexual thing that somehow isn't sex we can have more intelligent, informed conversations about what we want and do not want. I don't mean to sound like a mom or a prudish sex-ed teacher lecturing on how it's important that we consider things like oral sex and manual stimulation to be sex because you shouldn't do any of these things. So long as all parmers involved want to be involved, by all means, go for it. But if we talk about sex as something that just happens between a particular pair of genitals we reinforce heterosexual privilege as well as trivialize the sex we are having, PN or otherwise. EMMA GOLD THE 6AOF LY, FEBRUARY 2010 3 �THE QUAD Confidentiality at St. John's-HI of Ill An interview with Susan PaaLman. by Brandon Garney, Glass of 2012 Can you describe your role as the assistant dean at the college? BRANDON CARNEY: SusAN PAALMAN: I think the assistant dean is here in order to facilitate students' journey th~ough the college. I'm less focused on the academic matters though I do some academic things. I'm more focused on certain personal matters-health, safety, and welfare. It originated, I've been told, when women first came to the college. This was originally a "dean of women" kind of role, and then it sort of turned into somebody to kind of facilitate other aspects of life for the students. What I try to think about as I do my job is how to help the community ~n itself. That involves a lot of different aspects for various situations. BC: What is the assistant dean's relationship with the alcohol counselor? SP: Well, all of the counselors are under the assistant dean. So they're all employees of the college and I'm their boss in a way. In another way, I'm not a counselor, so I'm not the kind of boss that oversees what they're doing. I see it more as we work together. If I hear of students that might benefit from them, I talk to the student, I might mention a name to a counselor if I think it might be some one they should hear about. The counselors also help me out if there is somebody that has some kind of situation that they just need to talk to somebody about. They have their privacy and confidentiality concerns as well as I do-we all do. We have to help each other out, but also be aware where the line is that shouldn't be crossed. 4 THE GADFLY, FEBBUARY 2010 AB counselors they can't divulge content of any students conversation without either the permission of the student or if there is some kind of imminent harm or threat. So those are the two things that they have to abide by. So Jerry works under those same rules the only difference is that he tends to deal with situations that are more related to substance use and abuse, though not exclusively. He talks to anybody who wants to talk him. BC: Do you ever send students to the counselors, the alcohol counselor in specific? SP: Sure. There.might be a case in which a student is having troubles of whatever sort, and this has always been the case, it might be something that I recommend the student to do or it might be something I require the student to do depending on the nature of the situation. If it's a requirement, then it would be written out. The student and I would talk about this, and I would write it out so that it was very clear-what the requirement was, and what kind of things they need to do. Those kinds of requirements come in various forms depending on the situation. It might be simply a requirement to go talk to the counselor. It might be a requirement to talk to a counselor and come up with a plan together, and then fulfill that plan whatever it turns out to be. It might be a requirement to go to the counselor and give the counselor permission to talk to me. Those are various possibilities that come up from time to time. It really just depends on what the situation is-what is best for the student and for the college to resolve the situation. BC: So you can require the student to allow the counselors to divulge information to you? SP: I can make that a condition of them continuing at the college. BC: Do you think that that undermines their roles as counselors? Do you think that that impedes their ability to help the student if the student knows that they have to have the counselor tell you things? Do you think that that will result in them withholding information from the counselors? SP: If a student's in that kind of situation, this is not something that just comes about randomly. The student has put his or herself in that situation because of things that have happened. The student is making a choice. If the student wants to remain at the college, then they have to go through and do what makes sense to me. I talk about it with the student and make sure the student understands why that is, what the requirement means. If the student ends up lying or withholding things from the counselor, it's not a good situation. It's not helpful for the student to resolve whatever problems they're facing. It's not helpful for the counselors to be able to make a good judgment. I guess I can't force anybody to do anything. I can only make the kind of judgments that I think are in the best interests of the student and the community. It's up to the student to do the best they can. And I think our �students do generally. It's a group of people that's very thoughtful about their own behavior and how what they do affects other people. BC: Do you see the office of assistant dean as an aid for students or as the role of disciplinarian? SP: I like to think that I am helping people. I think, in the end, my job is to help this community run itself. Sometime that requires disciplinary action. Discipline is teaching as well. It's sort of helping somebody to rule themselves. It doesn't always come to that. There are many, many things I do. Probably most of the things I do have to do with giving advice or helping some one through a situation. Helping them take the steps that they want to take, they just don't know what to do or something happened and they're not quite sure what it is. Most of what I do is not in this realm of consequences and punishments or discipline. I'm a tutor. The assistant dean comes from the ranks of the tutors. I teach; this is what I do. I don't leave that behind when I'm trying to talk to somebody who's broken some rule or gone too far. I try to work with that person to help them understand what is going on. It may be that that student and I simply disagree, and then I just have to m.ake my best judgment, my best decision. BC: How do you think the students view the assistant dean? SP: I don't know. I guess you could probably be a better judge of that than I would be. The people who come in here, many of them are coming in for help. I hope that they view me as some one who can help them. Many others are coming in because they've been summoned for some reason. I've been really pleasantly surprised. Maybe I shouldn't have been surprised. As a tutor, you see the great potential tlnt the students have. Classes are just great, it's really a lot of fun- talking about the books, trying to work through everything. I guess I really didn't know how · or whether that would change when talking about more personal issues. I've just been really happy to see tl1at students come in here as people of integrity trying to work through things. I feel in general that I've had a good response from the students I've talked to. I'm sure there are plenty of people wondering about what is going on. You've told me and other people have told me that people are talking about various decisions that I've made or that other people have made. I think that's great; it's part of what make us a good community- people are really interested in what goes on. ~ It's easiest to steal from a person in a shower. • • Paul Morrill Ask Anyone Dear Expert, This hell smells awful-of gut cancer and poisoned fruit. My toes fester; my wind sweats. I have the most vivid dreams. Last night, backstage, while filling a pocket of milk with my uncle's marbles, the cat's eye rolled back. I prefer the expected. I'd imagined more space. As this bright splinter, locked beneath its glassy wave, flipped softly, the room flowered blue like the bottom of a well. I yearned for a grove of ilex, cooled by the breath of stone. I woke-was it midnight or morning? Loitering tapers cast the only dull gleam- in an airless vault, to the beating of birds' wings. Some foul paste, mingled with down, rimed my teeth. My fist held a sparrow, lifeless. My pockets spilled wings, stiff, and at the joint, gristly. I, once the boast and marvel of the fields, am today not even my own ghost. Expert, how can I end this mockery of a life? -Bobo, GI Dear Bobo, Zbigniew Herbert has a poem titled "Apollo and Marsyas," which mytl1, it just so happens, forms the subject of a forthcoming concept album, Tang, from freak folk supergroup Axpert Onion, with After the Beep Records. The real duel of Apollo with Marsyas (absolute ear versus immense range) takes place in the evening when as we already know the judges have awarded victory to the god bound tight to a tree meticulously stripped of his skin Marsyas howls before the howl reaches his tall ears he reposes in the shadow of that howl shaken by a shudder of disgust Apollo is cleaning his instrument only seemingly is the voice of Marsyas monotonous and composed of a single vowel THE SI DFLV, FEBRU ARY 2010 5 �\ Aaa in reality Marsyas relates the inexhaustable wealth of his body bald mountains of liver white ravines of aliment rustling forests of lung sweet hillocks of muscle joints bile blood and shudders the wintry wind of bone over the salt of memory shaken by a shudder of disgust Apollo is cleaning his instrument now to the chorus is joined the backbone of Marsyas in principle the same A only deeper with the addition of rust this is already beyond the endurance of the god with nerves of artificial fibre along a gravel path hedged with box the victor departs wondering whether out of Marsyas' howling there will not some day arise a new kind of art - let us say - concrete suddenly at his feet falls a petrified nightingale he looks back and sees that the hair of the tree to which Marsyas was fastened is white completely (Milosz & P.D. Scott, transl.) Hermeneutai, you are Marsyas. The following is dishonest. The riotous piping of your stiff aulos has attracted Truth's cruelty. He peels away your skin so that you may know fire in a soft breeze. Fear not, Bobo. You will die. But see what Order's vengeance gave you. As the story goes, Marsyas won the first round of this musical competition, as judged by the Muses. In round two, however, Apollo flipped his lyre. This a floutist cannot do. While Hannony, reversed or inverted, remains tranquilly himself, smiles and tears spring unbalanced. So Apollo wins, but Symmetry demands a third round, a duet. With S THE GADFlY, fEBRUHY 2010 the strings of his lyre, Apollo flays Marsyas, drawing sound from the satyr's lungs. Under Apollo's direction, the satyr so exceeds himself that Nature dies with his song. Marsyas dissolved was transfigured into a tributary of the Hellespont. Thus his acute sensitivity to existence both subjects the world to his mortality and draws her ceaseless change into himself. Bobo, just be you. CAROLYN ZELIKOW REAL NEWS IGLEHART-Phil Army and David Campbell Lozuway-McComsey [sic] unveiled their Kunai team name and jerseys. The recently dubbed Kablamazons (nee Amazons), captained by Kaura Mackey, Megan Field, and Rachel Ulrich, all wore their new t-shirts. Many said it was their new favorite garment. Army and Lozuway-McCornsey, who bought the team at Meet Market, said, "We are hoping our $4 20 investment will pay off. We think the revenue from the team should cover tuition next year since we're broke." The Kablamazons made good on the investment by winning in double overtime by four points. This is thanks to Mary Johnson, who kept it tied in the first overtime by scoring not one but two points, out of a team total of not one but two points, and Rachel Hahn, who scored all four points in the second overtime. The final score was 35-31. They beat a team wearing the primary color yellow. In other news, Editor-in-Chieg Kirstie Dodd tells Campbell she will not publish his recent article about Manhood. She gives no reason. She, also, refused to publish his article two weeks before; more understandably, it was a theory about her love for him, which is an inherently flawed theory. She also told him to find some real news, as in stuff that happened to write about, rather than writing about things he finds interesting and/or thinks will upset The Polity. Campbell thinks but does not ask, "when is the last time Kirstie Dodd wrote an article about events that happened at SJCA? Oh yeah, never." -Campell Freshman �DODD ON THE QUAD 'em, blackjack, craps ... you name these three, and they got 'em! Out of all the casino games, craps is my personal favorite . Popularized by the Creole gambler-dandy Bernard Xavier Philippe de Marigny de Mandeville in New Orleans in the 19th century (I'm not making this up), it boasts low house odds like blackjack and bacarrat (a stupid French card game). That means that you will lose less money over an extended period of time At breakfast last Thursday, a group of than if you were to play Caribbean stud haggard, bleary-eyed seniors huddled over poker, Keno, or slots. Craps needs neither their plates of imitation eggs and greasy cards nor a complex roulette apparatus. It bacon in cafe Randall. can be played in the streets or on the fancy "It's like we have post-partum depression green felt seen in casinos. And it, oddly or,something," commented Megan Field, enough, is a lot like seminar: a bunch of in reference to completing the senior essay people hanging around a table, slinging writing period. A number of other seniors ridiculous jargon left and right, cheeks nodded their heads in assent. "It's so hard flushed with camaraderie and the exciting to get up and go to class in the morning." promise that something lucky will happen. This feeling isn't localized in one class; The rules are simple. Everyone around the seniors' second semester torpor is the table placing bets is gunning for the spreading to the underclassmen. The soiled "shooter," the one who tosses out the igloo dominating the quad has unwitdice. Bets are placed on either the "Pass" tingly become the tragic symbol of the or "Don't Pass" line before the first campus' seasonal depression. In a phone roll, or the "come out" roll. For interview on Sunday, junior Greg House a bet on the "Pass" line, if the also expressed his frustration: "The snow is : shooter rolls a 7 or an 11, you retarded. I [feel] [overwhelmed]. I'm lookwin; if the shooter rolls a 2, 3, or ing forward to Lola's. No, I'm not looking 12, you lose. Any other number forward to Lola's- who am I kidding? " becomes the "point" number, Not this girl, Greg House. I know for a which the shooter must roll fact you've never even been to Lola's before. again before he or she rolls You've got to give it a chance. In the party a seven-what is commonly smorgasbord that the spring "party season" referred to as "crapping has to offer, Lola's is by far the best way to out." If the shooter rolls the shake the inertia and ennui out of one's point, you win even money. If snow-seeped limbs. Consider the average the shooter rolls a seven, you Reality party, where you are only able to lose everything. Further, dependglut yourself on a mere handful of vices. ing on the type of odds one is At Lola's, with the added component of playing, and throughout the course gambling, you can flip cards and shake dice of the game one can place individual bets all the way down to the Inferno. Texas hold on rarer dice combinations like "boxcars" An Ode to Craps BY KIRSTIE DODD (double sixes), "snake eyes" (double ones), or any of the "hard way" pairs bets. Or you can play the field bets, which are a 50-50 chance, and individual numbers like eights, nines, and tens can be played after the "come out" roll for a multi-roll bet. When I play blackjack and Texas hold 'em, I feel like I need a pair of sunglasses, a dirty baseball cap, and a degree from MIT. When I play craps, I feel like a Bond girl with a fake mole, a mink stole, a long cigarette filter. If you choose to try your luck at this Lola's, remember a few key things about the craps table. "Gambler's fallacy" eventually usurps the brain of everyone who plays. If you stand there long enough, you will begin to disregard the statistical probabilities for each dice combination, and you will start to think the numbers have feelings and memories- that certain shooters, methods of shaking the dice, and even the stickmen are out to get you. Try not to let this superstition sneak in too early. Second, there's no sense in ever betting on the "Don't Pass" line for the come out roll if you are a beginner. Third, and most importantly, you will eventually lose. Just play long enough so you kick those winter blues. ...._. THE 6ADFl V FEG RUAR V , 20 10 7 �THE GADFLY 60 College Avenue A.'lnapolis, Maryland 21401 United States of America Edito;-in-Chief Kirstie Dodd Junior Editor Elizabeth Spagnoletti Design Editor ]. Keenan Trotter Business Manager Graphic Anirt Spots Ir.terns Contribu.tor.s Marin Skokandic Noah Litvin Jack Neill Annika Schweibert & Lydia Boaz Campbell Brandon Carney Emma Gold Laurel Fischer Sophie Michelewicz Paul Morrill Greg Yatarola Carolyu Zelikow F o'.mded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly distributed to over 600 smdents, faculty, and staff of t.1-ie Annapolis campus. Opinions expressed within are the sole responsibility of the author(s). The Gadfly reserves die right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, informative, and tlicught..provoking newspaper which circum.. stances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submit.. ted will be edited for grammar, puncruation, and spelling in most casq. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. Tne Gadfly meets every Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the BarrBuchanan Center. All articles are due at 11:59 PM on Thursday. The Gadfly recommends Strunk & 'White's Tne Elements of Style and the Cbcago Manual of Style to you, the Polity; your usage of semicolons may benefit. Tel: 410-263-2066 Fax: 410-263-4647 8 m GADFL1, Hmm 2010 56 Maryland Avenue Annapolis, Maryland 21401 shop@smokeshopusaltd.com � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXII, Issue 3 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2010-02 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXII, Issue 3 of The Gadfly. Published February 2010. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 32.3 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/b4e52a545dd2f4b12f156bd3d19c97a3.pdf ead05106f8564285d32edbaaa6d985f9 PDF Text Text �THED.C. elect the members of the StuFor weeks now the Delegate dent Committee on Instruction Council has been trying to fill and the student representatives representative posit10ns for to the Board of Visitors and Humphreys and Gilliam donns. Governors, which are important Our lack of success in this en- positions, as they deal with the deavor raises a few important Program and the administration concerns that I'd like to address of the College. The Delegate in this article. First, it seems that Council will also be dealing despite the Council's attempts at with changes to the Polity Concommunication, many residents stitution, such as the formation of t..l-tese dorms are still unaware of a Polity Court. that they are unrepresented. UnYou may still deny that filling fortunately, you are-as of right these open Delegate positions is now you do not exist in the Pol- important. If so, no amount of ity's main representative body. argument on my part will con-----which leans · me to the sec• --vi:nce yoffthatit's important-re ond concern: Humphreys' and be political, in the sense of beGilliam's lack of representation ing active in the Polity, or that the Delegate poses a democratCouncil is a ic quandary. We good way of are about to undoing this. dertake a couple But if nothof significant votes ing else, at without access to least think of the wishes and needs of a large chunk of the your poor resume. Polity's population. The license So, residents of Gilliam and plates for the District of Colum- Humphreys, you have a marvelbia rightly scream "Taxation ous opportunity to do yourselves without Representation," and and the Polity a favor. Take it. while taxation is obviously not (That means you should contact u.1-ie issue here, the existence of Brendan McGivney.) a "District of Columbia" within Hannah VanHoose the Polity is somewhat disturb- Senior ing. The third concern has to do CONTENT ISSUES with freshmen. A representative Here's the deal folks-and I use to the Delegate Council has to that tem1 iightly. In your rag have been enrolled in Annapolis from last week, you managed to for at least one semester, which perform some stupendous errors has previously excluded fresh- of newspaper-writing. First, the men, leaving Humphreys in a layout was lnore confusing u.1-ian particularly difficult place. But Aristotle's Metaphysics, and lead with these open seats, Fresh- /sic] me and several others (he men, you can now be Delegates, said threateningly) to suppose too. You may be asking, "Why that Ms. Dodd' s contribution would I want to be a Delegate?" had been cut (perhaps mercifulWell, why not? As a fresh- ly perhaps unfortunately) short. man, you're in the Dining Hall Then, there were more d1an the at lunch every day anyway. So usual typos and miscellaneous instead of being crammed vlith letters (my favorite among them fifteen people at an eight-per- was "to sink down into dork son rable, you can spend your despair" which distracted very Wednesdays in the comfort of nicely from the interesting point the Private Dining Room and of that sentence penned by yet even serve your beloved Polity in another anonymous: The Gadfly publishes far to many derisive the process. As for those upperclassmen articles ... but I digress). Finally, asking this question, the Del- and most astoundingly, . you egate Council does do more took the last line of the poem than just dole out cash. We also by Ms. Early and copied it over The Mail 2 THE GAilflY, MARCH 2010 to the end of Ms. Mohr's poem; this is hands down the greatest feat of incomprehensible incompetence I have seen in print, besides, perhaps, the contributions of Ms. Zelikow (I add here for perspective that I have read far too much Ayn Rand, and so I know well incomprehensible incompetence in print). Speaking of Ms. Zelikow, did she finally retire or is the repeat of her snobbish balderdash from last week some kind of deeply meaningful statement? Mind you, I can only ever read one ofher-"questions"perweek before building my spirits back up enough to attempt the answer, so she may have provided a different nonsense poem than before. In that case, I apologize for my mistake; if that is not the case .. .I apologize for nothing. Speaking of apologies, 1 apologize for so butchering the English language in my most recent contribution (the response to "A Johnnie"), but then again, I thought sending an opinion piece in was submitting it for editing-there is that handy "in most cases" hanging on there at the end of the sentence "Letters submitted vli.11 be edited for grammar, puncmation, and spelling." I did find it a little strange how you edited my submission for content (clever use of the brackets) but then missed the grammatical errors, but hey!-if nobody's perfect than you all most certainlv a.ren't. Finally, I would like to point out to you people (another term used lightly), and most of all Ms. Gold, that "Of Johns and Johnnies" (great title, by the way) was billed to the Polity as a Sex Advice Column. To my understanding, such a column requires an impetus in the form of a question to which t..'ie columnist gives advice. Therefore, while I disagreed with Ms. Gold's treatment of the concerns of "Taking it Easy" in her first article, I respected the form. Would that I could say the same for this week's issue! Instead, you have left us with a provocateur who while admittedly "playing it dumb" is in no way protected by the excuse, "Well, the questioner did ask for her opinion." All this is to say that, while I admire the wit of the bait-and-switch you have accomplished, I dislike the switch. The genius of an advice column is that it leaves the Polity open to refusing to ask for advice, which in tum indicates we are not ready for or do not want such discussion in a public forum (or at all). Logan Dwyer Sophomore IN'TR.OSPECTION What is your function in the St. John's community? After a clear halt to contributions from the Polity, last year you drifted out of circulation. This year you find yourself under new management. Wit..h that comes many great, and necessary, changes. Over the course of last semester and a half, I have witnessed not only the constant evolution of your stylistic layout, but also the continuous change of your article content. Understandably, you needed time to find new footing on solid ground, but have you done so? The ongoing drift towards becoming merely an outlet for a few sophomoric voices to repeat themselves is troublesome. Was this not tl1e cause of your hiatus last year? Though campus news finds a meager place in most issues, what of the world? There is much going on outside of our campus that much of the polity is unaware of. Yes, there are newspapers in the library and d1e fishbowl; however, as a student publication you are blessed with an accessibility that no outside publication can easily match. Whichever direction you choose to travel in, you have my full support. But, be sure you are not compromising yourself for reasons as trivial as having only a few dedicated writers. If you wish for support, just ask. We will write. Either way, I think it is long past time that you sit down and decide what your purpose is in this community. Karl Fausmen �Senior "Karl Fausmen" appears to be a pseudonym. BEING OFFENDED I am offended and disgusted by Emma Gold's Sex Advice Colmnn. How dare Ms. Gold offer a weekly column giving tips for bizarre, kinky sex when many members of the Polity, myself included, are (against our choice) unable to have bizarre, kinky sex on a weekly basis? This sort of insensitivity goes against everything I've come to expect from The Gadfly. Daniel Dausman Junior CONFIDENTIALITY I'm not sure if I fully grasp the reasoning behind our Assistant Dean's apparent belief (published in the third installment of "Confidentiality at St. John's") that impelling students to forsake their right to counselor-student confidentiality is an appropriate disciplinary practice. She seems to understand that the role of a disciplinarian is as much of a teaching role as a tutor's, so why can she not see that such a practice teaches students to lie to the administration? Perhaps I should explain my own thinking further. Let us suppose, for the sake of argument, that Student A and Student B are both Johnnies with the type of problems that land them in Power Alley frequently enough to finally be recommended to one of St. John's counselors for help. Let us also suppose that they were both told to allow said counselor to report their private discussions back to the Assistant Dean as a condition of their remaining 'Student' A and 'Student' B at St. John's. Now, Student A read his Nichomachean Ethics, and decides that telling the counselor the truth about his issues is tl1e best course of action, because he honestly believes that it is witl1in the counselor's ability to help him. Student B was too stoned/ drunk/whatever freshman year to give the Ethics much regard at all and decides tl1at lying to the counselor is the best course of action, recognizing that any information passed between these ·students and the counselor is to be handed back to the Assistant Dean. Now, based on what we know about these two, Student A is evidently the better student, for he actually has faith in the Administration's ability to help him be a successful student at tl1is school. But from what I understand, it would seem that Student A is the most likely to be expelled. And for what? Using a counselor appropriately? Telling the truth? Are these principles by which we want to eliminate students from the Polity? Even having read and finnly agreed v..i.th Aristotle, I cannot say for sure that I would not lie to Ms. Paalman and the counselor. In fact, I probably would lie, because who wants to forsake a multi-thousand dollar investment like that? How does this practice "help the community run itself," an objective tl1at Ms. Paalman claims to hold in high regard? I find it strange that she seems to expect more faith from the Polity than she seems to show towards our own ability to moderate ourselves. One of the things that I treasure most about our school is that the "problems" that are typically inherent to most student bodies are largely self-eliminating on this campus, that is to say that the students who do not belong at St. Johns are, mostly, quick to recognize this fact and leave of their own volition. So if we have a student who wants to be here so much that they are willing to seek counseling to change potentially destructive behavior in order to become more fit for this campus why, in the name of all that this school holds true, would we want any negative consequences for the honest behavior tl1at would make the best use of such counsel? William Pecoraro Sophomore MONDAY To the chagrin of many, precipitation found its way back on campus Monday afternoon. While some students speculated as to whether or not it would be cold enough for the rain to freeze overnight, Sophomore Alex Leone, a native of Minnesota, said, "I'm not saying below freezing is cold. I'm saying tl1at water thinks it is." At least 50 students, tutors, alumni, and historians attended Kirstie Dodd's Senior Oral at 3.45. Fellow Senior Anne Duf fee commented, "It was excruciating... because I love Kirstie so much. I think she did great." Ms. Dodd had this to say when asked how her oral went: "I felt like it was ... adrenaline pumping... like I was training for the Olympics ... ice-dancing." The igloo caved in. TUESDAY Tuesday afternoon, officers of the Delegate Council, Dave Maher, Brendan McGivney, and Sasha Serabrannyk, met with interested students in the Conversation Room. The topic of discussion was the proposed Polity Court. Multiple issues were discussed, p1i.marily the role of the court, the philosophy of self-governance, and the role of the Resident Assistants. To those involved, it is common knowledge that the Santa Fe campus has a similar body called the Student Review Board. Annapolis's Polity Court hopes to model itself, with some modifications, after the SRB. When asked how the Board works in Santa Fe, Ty Schintzius, a transfer, responded, "It works really well. When people act like idiots, it's obvious. What you have to do, tl1e administration refers to the student board and they pawn off obvious disciplinary issues." The DC will meet this Wednesday to discuss the proposal further. WEDNESDAY The Annual Housing Lottery took place at 2:45 on Wednesday afternoon. An· anonymous sophomore commented: "We drew numbers from a red sack. Last year, we had a paper sack. I feel like things are looking up." In the lunch line, two unnamed seniors discussed the Senior Class Gift at Santa Fe, a donation of all the money to Haiti for earthquake relief. One commented: "The act is extremely altruistic. I'm very upset." 1HURSDAY The fates of the hopeful Santa Fe transfers were finalized. Sixteen transfer spots were available with twenty-some hopefuls. One student, desperate to leave the Annapolis campus took extreme measures to change his number, to no avail. FRIDAY Mr. Townsend told a Phillip Glass knock-knock joke to his sophomore music class. THE Sl DFlY, MARCH 2010 3 �H ere's a story. When Shimer College, which now operates in Chicago, moved to Waukegan, Illinois- after nearly bankrupting itself at its campus in Mount Carroll (in northern Illinois)-it adopted a procedural selfgovemance-that-granted-each member of the College (the students, staff, trustees, and faculty) with voting rights for stuff like budgets and curriculum changes. This idea was called The Assembly. Decades later, in 2006, when the college could no longer afford to operate in Waukegan, it moved to Chicago with the support of a grant by an anonymous donor. The donor turned out to be the philanthropist Barre Seid, who lives in Chicago. A Shimer student had perused publiclyavailable tax records and discovered the donation; last week someone distributed flyers around Shimer's campus which outed Seid. Seid is notable because the foundation which operates in his name has also donated lots of money to conservative think tanks such as the Cato Institute. (Seid also bankrolled something called the Intercollegiate Studies Institute, which spends actual money on reporting the growing rates of "liberalism"-like being a Democrat-on college campuses.) Shimer, which enrolls a recognizably liberal student body, was saved by the money of a man with a deeply conservative political agenda. Here's another: A few days ago, Shimer issu ed a press release celebrating their new mission statement, which now focuses more on being a citizen and studying the Constitution. It's not especially controversial in itself. (Chris Nelson is quoted in it. "We are appreciative of the work of [Shimer] President [Thomas K.] Lindsay and others involved in the process. This statement acknowledges our debt to the books and authors that have helped shape our intellectual heritage and our understanding of the world we inhabit, " he says.) But it marks a shift that's been taking place at Shimer, a sea change that has seen the power of The Assembly to govern the College diminish significantly. All of this began a little over a year ago when Thomas K. Lindsay, who previously worked at the National Endowment for the Humanities 4 THE GADFL Y MARCH , 2010 lum.] The under the Bush administration, was elected Shimer's pr~sident. (Chri.s Nelson was there for that, too.) I was introduced to Lindsay last August, when I visited Shimer for a forthcoming article in The Gadfly. We were standing in a kind of common room on the third floor of an office building that Shimer has been renting out from the Illinois Institute of Technology. Cassie Shennan, a 2003 graduate of St. John's, had been showing me around when she saw Lindsay and proceeded to introduce me. According to much reporting done by students at Shimer, Lindsay has made it his mission to use Shimer as a vehicle for some kind of new political, or civic (and possibly conservative) agenda. Just a week ago, Lindsay steamrolled student and faculty efforts to retain Shimer's miss10n statement. (It used to read: The mission of Shimer College is education- education for active citizenship in the world. Education is more than the acquisition of factual knowledge or the mastery of vocational skills. It is the process leading away from passivity, beyond either unquestioning acceptance of authority or its automatic mistrust, and towards informed, responsible action. The new mission statement is about fifteen times longer. It now reads: community recognizes that the intellectual liberty it pursues depends on its being situated in a system of political liberty~t is, Shimer's cultivation of free minds simultaneously transcends and depends on the political freedom enshrined in the American Constitution. This dependence, along with the College's commitment to enhancing its students' selfknowledge, leads it to require of all students the serious study of the Founding documents-the Declaration of Independence, the U.S. Constitution, and The Federalist- as well as the other original sources that both informed the Founding and reacted to it.) This conflict illustrates Shimer's determination to both retain its ability to govern itself (perhaps for reasons both moral and symbolic) and actually succeed. (You may forget that St. John's, even with its bodies of student government and the SCI, still bestows large amounts of not-especially-scrutinized power and trust unto the President and the Board of Visitors & Governors, giving them the ability to decide important parts of one's experience here. I suspect, however, that putting the decisions, the real decisions, about money, compensation, etc., into the hands of professionals is a good thing. Certainly we have not seen the calamity of finances Shimer has, and I think we can partly thank people you and I have never met for that.) But now Shimer finds itself spiritually indebted to two men: Lindsay and Seid. Men with political sympathies demonstrably opposite those of the majority of the student body. (Late last year, Lindsay mistakenly left a draft of a letter he intended to send to someone at the Cato Institute about how he was succeeding as a president now that his conservatism was being criticized by The Chicago Reader. Which: yeah.) The two constants of Shimer's history in the last quarter of the 20th century and ear- Trouble in Chicago [... ] The word "liberal" in "liberal education" has the same root as the word "liberty. " Liberal education at Shimer is an education for and through liberty. Agreeing with Socrates that the "unexamined life is. not worth living," Shimer finds the highest liberty to consist in the freedom of the mind; that is, in freedom from unexamined assumptions, for ~ample, swings in intellectual fashion, partisan politics, and ideology. Liberty at its peak is thus identical with the pursuit of truth. [... ] [List of books on Shimer's curricu- Shimer �ly 21st century have been its self-governance and its money troubles. (It's not very reassuring that Shimer is the only other secular Great Books college in America.) Recent events should make one wonder whether the fonner caused the latter, if Shimer' s lack of foresight, galvanized by The Assembly, beget its financial woes. Cynically, it's easy to say yes; even more cynically, it's easy to say that Lindsay is ensuring Shimer's survival, even if that means giving up part of its heritage. (Maybe it will be Lindsay who lifts Shimer up and out of its pit.) Remember: Shimer wouldn't be around if Barre Seid hadn't decided to give them well over half a million dollars. (In thanks, Lindsay-appointed several trustees wirh ties to Seid.) But the thing about Shimer right now is that it has to strike some kind of balance. A college this small (Shimer has about one hundred and ten students, and just eleven active faculty members) may need, in a way that St. John's probably doesn't, someone to say that the whims of a body like The Assembly will not always align with the interest of Shimer. Which would now be Shimer's very existence. That's not a political dialogue, or even an emotional conversation. That's a financial decision. A choice, though- between what we are and how, exactly, we're going to survive- that St. John's hopefully will never have to make. KEENAN TROTTER D ear Miss Em, I was having a conversation with a friend, and he mentioned that the new acronym is "LGBTQQA" (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Questioning, · Asexual). We began a conversation about what "Queer" means in this context and found we didn't really know. Any insight? Sincerely, Just Questioning sion in terminology, finding umbrella terms can be tricky. Queer is an umbrella term for non-heteronormative people. Queer is an insult that has been reclaimed by those who were tarred with it. Queer may or may not be inherently political. Great, but what's heterononnativity? Granted, queers were calling themselves queer before the word, "heternonnativity", was coined by academic Michael Warner in his 1993 book, "Fear of a Queer Planet." However, most current definitions of "queer" talk about it in contrast to heteronorn1ativity. So it's everybody's favorite: Definition Time! Heteronormativity is a way of talking about society being centered on heterosexuality. Here's a quote from Warner's book: ~, '. Het culture thinks of itself as the elemental form of human association, as the very model of inter-gender relations, as the indivisible basis of all community, and as the means of reproduction without which society wouldn't exist. (Introduction, xxi) Being non-heteronormative is inherently transgressive. Identifying as queer means one identifies with the cultural struggle of a minority, as part of that minority. The extent to which queer is a political term is hard to gauge. Many people use it simply as a sexual identity. Others claim that desires and relationships, of whatever orientation, make a statement about hetero- . normative culture, and such a statement must needs be political. This is contended territory. There is a whole realm of study called queer theory that I am utterly unqualified to talk about. I'll let you know after grad school. "Queer" also resolves some issues in terms like "bisexual" and "pansexual" for someone with multiple partners of various genders. "Bisexual", for example, reinforces the gender binary, that is, it forces one to identify as male or female. "Pansexual" fails to rule out predominantly heteronorn1ative relationships. Hope that clears things up, JQ! OfJohns and Johnnies JQ, do you know what a can of worms you're opening here? Before I start, a word on acronyn1s: there are dozens of variants of LGBT or LGBTQ that hope to be inclusive of the non-heterosexual community. There is also the argument that being lumped together by virtue of being sexually "other" is not very helpful, because there is not actually a community there except as a response to the dominant culture. Some groups have given up on the acronyms altogether, like NYC's Alphabet Soup. But as we see from the desire for inclu- [ ' \ WINTER IN NAPTOWN In a town tl1at does not wait for night To bore you fast asleep, Any hope to stay awake rests witl1 The company you keep. The tourists here lead one to fear The places from which they have come. What dearth of life, what dim-shone light Would make them seek tllis town for fun? The traffic lights ne»er do changeAlways restricting red, sustainedAs if to say, "Don't take the pains To venture when you could remain "In a town that always feels tlle same As just the day before," The bricks stack-up to fonn high walls That hold like sepulchers. -Gabriel Luzier Senior EMMA GOLD THE GADFLY, MARCH 2010 5 �and right to his chums. The toast of every party, he is lauded for his superior fine motor skills and attention to detail. The latter :j child, the one with the sloppy, slumpy hand~ writing, feels sensitive about his inability and ~ thus develops a complex about pens, paper, 5 and writing on the board. This springboards ~ - his future career of sarcasm and self-depre>< >'l cation; his handwriting merely indicates his "high intelligence." The common idea that separates "boy" ccording to a study done by the National writing. Charles Da~n (the British natu- handwriting and "girl" handwriting probAcademies of Science's Institute of Med- ralist, not the Johnnie) in Descent of Man ably springs from this moment in childicine (IOM), doctors' chicken scratch claims handwriting "depends partly on the hood that separates those who write well kills more than form of the hand and those who write poorly. Developmen7 ,000 people anand partly on tally, girls ripen quicker than boys; in third nually. This statisthe disposition grade when students are taught script, girls' tic (though it imof the mind." A fine motor skills give them a calligraphic plicitly condemns hand- advantage over their male peers. But, of person's the pharmaceutiwriting is a com- course, there are exceptions that prove the cal world as well) plex admixture of rule. Consider senior Megan Kennedy, who means that out of imitation, educa- stood at the board explaining an equation of the 3.2 billion pretion, physiology relativity in a math class on Friday. The carscriptions written and genetics, per- digan and the polite smile might fool a less per year, enough sonal aesthetic, attentive observer into thinking Ms. Kenhave hastily, slopand application nedy spends hours practicing her serifs and pily written dosagof practice. Good flourishes. But there in her pretty, feminine es and obscure abhandwriting is fingers lies donnant a cipher to rival a 5th breviations to turn like having good grader's. "Uhh, that's a tau," she said with the joke about teeth. You inherit a nervous laugh, erasing and redrawing the doctor scrawl both a basic den- same indistinguishable squiggle. ''And that's into something tal scheme and supposed to be a y." sinister and sad. St. John's, oddly enough, imparts an your hand shape I have this image from your par- awareness of the importance of good script. of Hippocrates, ents. Through It's no secret that ancient Greek provides a eating baby back practicing hand- crash-course in learning how to consciously ribs and smoking mentholated ciggies with writing you get better, kind of like the cor- draw letters rather than write them. MorePericles and Aristotle somewhere in the Ely- rective power of wearing braces. But then, over, all of the old school board work we do sian Fields, when he hears this statistic. Red after you are done practicing, you must con- helps people understand the importance of with rage, he starts to choke on a bone, and sciously maintain your writing like flossing legibility and visual organization. No one he only revives after Aristotle calls Patrocles or brushing your teeth if you don't want it wants to sit in a freshman math class during over to bust out the Heimlich maneuver. to get all crooked and yellow and disgusting a Book 3 proposition, hoping for the demBut what steams me the most about this and filled with nasty cavities. onstrator to draw a circle but getting a hopestatistic is that it convinces doctors to emAround second or third grade, a deci- less potato or mashed tire instead. brace technology rather than facing the real T his article is for you Megan Kennedy. sive moment happens for every child. problem: poor handwriting. The three He either answers the battle cry of his Thanks for trying when you go to board. ugly stepsisters of Our Digital Age- texelementary teachers to hop aboard Just don't become my doctor. ting, tweeting, and typing-have replaced the penmanship, or he javelins his the art of the handwritten word. But I'll pencil into the soft of a ceiling stop there ... I'm not very good at Blechtile in a fit of exasperation and eleatic return-to-ideals lamentations, nor anti-authoritarianism. The ROTTEN-BREATHED SLANDER am I capable of writing those stolid, former child is blessed Bobber Sale armchair treatises of yesindeed. He goes about is unhacked gak teryear. (And besides, I'll be the first his daily existence snotty in tl1e speaker's tl1roat, to admit that the QWERTY keyboard without a care in a song of seventh-chords, on my phone changed my life, and that the world, ratstrain ·with no resolving note. "shooting an email" just sounds more \ ~ _ding o~f charmglam than laboring over a handwritten .V 1 n g Be gone, be silentletter.) ~~~ handor my throbbing mind explore! The increase of technology plays ~ ' ,\.. ~~J _written only a minor role in the reason ~· ':::.-\ ''\~ - 7~ ~ \_ notes -Andrew Mize why people have bad hand~ ~~~ 1 ef t Sophomore A DODD ON THE QUAD Griffonage BY KIRSTIE DODD --- ~ 6 THE SADfl Y, MARCH 2010 :::::::;:::::-- ~ ---- .._, �ST Yl E RANT KUNING'S GUIDE TD NOT GETTING ANY GIRLS I 've perfected the art of not getting girls. Hard to believe, though you might find it easy to believe me when I say it. I have pretty much never ever got a girl, ever. Many people ask me how it's done. Here,fm the first time, exclusively, is Grant Kuning's guide to not getting any of the girls. At all. Ever. times girls come to you; like they see you tend to sit alone, and, despite your habits of dressing like a loser, you're not hideous so they allow their feelings of pity to lead th~~~hres to y;ur t~hle, and they're like "what's up why do you always sit alone" and you freak out because you're a big LOSER, THE GADFLY 60 College Avenue A.'1.napolis, Maryland 21401 United States of .A..'llerica Edita-r-in-Chief KiTstie Dodd ]uni:rr Editor Eii:zabeth Spagnoletti Design Edi tar J. Keena,,_.,_ Trotter- Busineu Mar.ager Graphic A;tist Spoi:s In::erru Cont:ibutors LOSER, LOSER. Marin Skckandic Noah Litvin Jack Neill A.1.nika Schweibert & Lydia Boaz Dari.tel Dausman Logan Dv.yec Stephanie Glue Emma Gold Chris Johns Grant Kuning Michael Lacy Gabriel Ll.i.zie:Andrew Mize Paul Merrill TOTALLY CREEP GIRLS BEING R LLY NERVOUS OUT BY STARING AT THEM ALL THE TIME So I was like hitting on this girl (I think?) the other day, and whenever she started talking I got really nervous and had to focus real hard to maintain eye contact. I kept sipping from my cup to alleviate the internal struggle I felt in myself because I was pretty sure Gl.iatwhile the t..1-iing wiu.11. u.\e girl (?) could go like ok, maybe I was pretty sure I was gonna screw it up because that's just like what I do. So, like, l'm thinking that ultimately she found my nervousness pretty unattractive anyway because its like "oh you're so nervous what are you hiding from me~" or so1nething I guess and like i'are you afraid to be yourself' and the answer is yes. SITTING BY MYSELF D NOT REALLY MAK.. ING FRIENDS Yeah I guess you have to make friends, and throw yourself into new social circles, and, like, that can be a good way to meet girls but I don't do that. A'ld like when you eat at the dining hall that's a place where t..1-ie girls are, but they're scary because like what if they reject you? Some- I t..1-iink this one's pretty self-explanatory, guys, but its not completely cut-and-dry, fellas! Some girls dig this because its like that middle school way of telling a girl you like her where you make eye contact just long enough that it becomes awkward and you have to make her look away first, but when she tells her friends they're all like "oh do you t.1-iink he likes you," and she is like "oh I think he likes me." Then her friends confront you, and t..hey're like "do you like her," but it was just your incomprehension of com1"!lon social cues 'Williarn. Pecoraro Har1nah Van.Hoose F ounded i:t 1980, The Gadfly fs r.li.e stu~ dent weekly distributed to over 600 studen~, faculty, and staff of i:.~e A::.napcr lis ca..'TlpUs. Opinions expressed within are the scle r-esp011sibi.licy of the author(s). The Gadfl.y reserves :i1e right to accep[, reject, and edit submissior1s in any way necessary to publish the most professiona'., informative, and thot.:ght--provoking nev;spaper which cir~ cums[;inces at St. John's permit. Letters of 100 words or ;e,ss have a bet~ ter chance of being published th.an those icnger. Letters s'J.b!ni:ted v:ilI be edited fer grammar, punctuation, and speU;ng in most cases. Tu Gadfiy is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circum~ star.ces. Th<! Gadfiy meets every Friday at? ?M i.n t..'"i.e lcwer le.-·el of t..1-ie Barr~Bucha..1.an Center. AH artides are due at 11:59 PM on Thtir.sday. Well dudes there're three ace tips for not getting the girls ti\at are prettyl Just repeat these simple seeps to yourselves over and over again, and you will remain a virgin as long as you live. JOCKS O' THE WEEK �HOME & GARDEN STRANGER DANGER: THE ANNAPOLIS SURVWAL GUIDE ... FOR GIRLS! BY STEPHANIE GLUE Hey girts; listen up. The- name's Stepha~ nie, last name Glue, but my friends just call me Steph for short. I've been away in Jamaica hosting a fashion show for the past couple lamb-shakes, so chances are we haven't yet gotten around to bumping derrieres. However, through a series of, well, extenuating circumstances, I happen to be exceedingly familiar with the P.r:napolis area in general and the St. John's campus in particular. I am also hot on the trot Vlith current Sophomore hearrr..hrob Chris Johns. He asked me to wTite u.\is article and well...a girlfriend's gotta do what a girlfriend's gotta do! Also, let's not make this personal ladies, but... hands off. DDN'T's Back-Alley Dentistry: Okay, teeu.1-i-check senoritas. If you're like most girls, your smile just doesn't sparkle like it could. However, if you want a whiter bite, see a real dentist. Do NOT, by any means, visit a back-alley practitioner. He n1ight give you credentials up the vvazoo and back again, but if he doesn't have an office you're probably better off with a bottle of aspirin and a pair of pliers. Come on, you're in college now, girl! I know that means meeting people from every color of rainbow paja·mas, but do you really want a visit from the tooth fairy as well? Pet first, Ask Questions Later: There are many pets walking around Annapolis. Most of them are dogs. A girl's first instinct is always to pet first, and ask questions later. Please, it may be hard, but avoid this impulse at ali costs. I know it's shocking, but t..1-iere are a lot of mixed-breeds out and about these days. Of course, there have always been mutts, but it used to be that one could designate them by t..heir owners (or lack thereof). However, for the past 15 years 8 THE GAilflY, MARCH 2010 orso, and especiaHynow that we've entered the tweens, it seems like most people have completely lost their grip on any sense of decorum. Dogs that, to all appearances look pure are in many cases of very questionable pedigree. Tne only sure-fire way to know a dog for an am.. hentic breed is to question its owner, and question hard. Ask where they purchased rhe dog, and for how much. If they can't answer, or if they waver, hold back that hand! DO's Hair with Flare: If you weren't already aware, my hair is red. I know it looks great, but psst, if you can keep a secret: I'n1 not so sure that it~s not not naru.rail Of course~ I don't recom.. mend this particular color change for everyone, since most girls don't have the complexion to pull it off, and noti"iing screams "Ugly!" like a carrot-top flop. However, this shouldn't keep you from sprucing loose in some other way. You'd be surp1ised what a little creativity and a couple hundred dollars could do for your self-confidence. Some detailed fearb.e:dng and several hours with a curling iron will impart a wraith-like mystique that says, "No mercy." A few pink highlights and a little careful tangling will give you a hip bubble-gum look that leaves the boys smacking their lips and asking for more. Just don't go overboard! Nobody likes a girl who's Already Been Chewed, if you catch my meaning. Also, there's a reason God invented conditioner, ca.pisce? No one wants to talk to a girl who has a Gordian knot on her head. This isn'~ rocket-surgery,- girls. However" to give you an upper hand on the cornpetition, here are a few salons that l personally recommend. Tell them I sent you. 1. Jessifer Krinkle - 456 Wart Street - 410-245-2311 This Girl b.'1.ows perms. Period. If you're looking for something with a little extra spunk, Krinkle is your gal. She run's a tightship, so watch out! 2. Gordon Licker - Right next to the Shady-Hound Make-out Spot on Greg Street (the one with die neon lights) - No phone Gordon is a bit of a pretty-boy, but he gets the job done. He is also famous for his scalp and whole-body massages. He has a very personal touch, which he uses to great effect with some techniques he picked up on the Nile River. 3. Giuth Roberts - 90210 Black Car Alley- 410-666-4848 GluL.1-i. is the kind of woman who sees Lemons and makes Lemonade. You k..riow the type: brunette, heavyset... she's been around the block a few times and she'll give you some quality advice as well as a spanking new doc Give her a chance and you won 1t regret it. You might have some difficulty arranging an appointment, though. She :rurrs a hair-styling program for the mentally handicapped on the side, whiu.\ consumes a lot of her time. Whew! That's a lot of hair talk. I'n1 afraid that's all : have time to v.rrite at the moment. The waves are calling my name. I guess, as the saying goes, I'll smell you on the flipside! Stepha- � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Editor in Chief) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXII, Issue 5 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2010-03 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXII, Issue 5 of The Gadfly. Published March 2010. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 32.5 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/5cf273c60b09770d0ccc6bd2891b11da.pdf 3255c01bc2a2e0244ab0cb3fedb781af PDF Text Text ~AD FLY VOLUMEXXI,N°.I ST. JOHN'S COLLEGE, ANNAPOLIS, MARYLAND 21401 MONDAY, 31 AUGUST2009 I was attached to this city by the godthough it seems a ridiculous thing to say as upon a great and noble horse which was somewhat sluggish because of its size and needed to be stirred up by a kind of GADFLY. It is to fulfill so1Ile such function that I believe the god has placed me in the city. I never cease to rouse each and every one of you, to persuade and reproach you all day long and everywhere I find myself • 1n your cotnpany. Socrates, Plato's Apologia (30d) �THE GADFLY Staff Senior Editor Kirstie Dodd Junior Editor Patrick Beeby Layout Editor Elizabeth Spagnoletti Layout Consultant Linden Duffee The Gadff_y: Four More Years! Because in a Floridian classroom long ago, a ten year old Kirstie Dodd decided a provocative MerriamWebster dictionary definition would forever be the best way to begin any piece of writing, we shall begin this new-and-hopefully-improved Gadfl.y with the following definition: Phoenix (n): a legendary bird that burned itselfto ashes on a pyre and rose up to live again. This little phoenix of a newspaper has changed hands, had its ups -and downs, crashed and burned numerous times, gone from frying pan to fire, Business Manager and every other overused idiom in Marin Skokandic between. Over the years it has been the premier weathercock of student Production Manager life at St. John's, turning this way Flash Gordon and that in the shifting winds of our ongoing dialogue. This Gadfly you Photographers hold in your hands is a part of that Chloe Ginsburg tradition. With deep remembrance of the past, we look forward to the Publisher future St. John's number one student St. John's Print Shop publication. The Gadfly, risen from the ashes, dredged from a festering mire Contributing to this Issue of apathy, is ready to once again take Rachel Bargis Brendan McGivney flight with your help. John Blechl Andrew Mize And since this is already sounding Jerome Dausman JP Snyder like a corny Obama campaign speech, Kirstie Dodd Socrates let'.s get to the point of this editor Bryce Jacobsen letter. The Gadfly, like public radio and Sesame Street, is made with Founded in 1980, The Gadffy is the contributions from readers like you! student weekly distributed free to over Ink up your quill or whatever you have 600 students, faculty, and staff of the to do and send some articles to gadfly@ Anna.polis campus as well as tutors emeriti, members of the Board of Visisjca.edu. The deadline is FRIDAY tors and Governors, and the offrices NIGHT at 11:59 pm. The paper goes at the St. John's Santa Fe campus. to print on Monday morning, and Opinions expressed within are the sole by Monday afternoon there will be a responsibility of the author(s). The Gad- fresh copy waiting in the coffee shop ffy reserves the right to accept, reject, for you to read instead of your seminar and edit submissions in any way necesreading. sary to publish the most professional., Here are a few things we would informative, and thought-provoking love to see in The Gadfly this year: newspaper which circumstances at St. •Printed word will become the John's permit. medium to foster communication between different classes and Copy Editor Ken Cosgrove 2 THE GADFLY tutors. •Students will be able to check up on things happening in freshman lab, sophomore language, junior math etc. and track conversations about what's happening on campus in Mellon and McDowell. •Healthy debates about topics will be promoted in The Gadfl.y, ranging from "non-Program" topics and current events (both worldwide and campus) to every Program topic. •Information will be spread about the Student Committee for Instruction, the Delegate Council, and other campus clubs, hopefully getting more people involved in the things that keep our school alive. •The talents of our diverse community will be highlighted and celebrated. So maybe the world of the newspaper is dying and maybe we're paving the road to journalistic hell with these good intentions, but so be it! At least we're not soulless and glossy, oops, we mean The Epoch. Yours for thinking, writing, reading, learning, laughing, and gerunds, The Gadfly Staff P.S. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. All articles are due at 11:59 pm every Friday. For display advertisements prices and information contact Marin Skokandic at marin.skokandic@sjca.edu ~ �•I I THE POETIC AESTHETIC Poetry Contest The Body Electric by Jerome Dausman, GI Musing on Pop-Culture and the Self THE POET LAUREATE OF ST. JOHN'S (SELF-PROCLAIMED) What better way to start off a new term and a new newspaper than with a poetry contest? I confess, I can't think of anything better! To make it easier on you who would be contestants, I have already written the poetry involved. You, dear reader, only need to explain, in the proverbial 25 words or less, what the poem is about! As an incentive, a gift certificate for $25.00 of mouth-watering cuisine from Chick & Ruth's will be awarded to the winner. The poem in question: Funky Town Come on down ta funky-town. Ya shoozle? It be waitin. Don be slow or creepin roun, No time for hezitatin. Mizz Bell shot what you ain't got. Yo mine's been altercated. Mine's a gol darn polyglot It sure bin blues-abated. Tricldin slow, then down she go! It's what ya new can4;ankrus. Hunkrin down, ya hit zero Yo puzzlin animagus. Good fer nuttin 'cept head buttin. It yo we done be laffin. Jazzin? Not! Cept you ain't cuttin. Enuf with yer darn crabbin. Come on down ta funky-town, Ya frens al mos fogot ya. Yoda clown of great renown, Ya own a great big hoo-ra. CONTEST RULES Eligible participants are any and all St. John's students, graduate students, alumni, tutors, or other staff, except staff members of this publication and counselors licensed to attend to us disturbed students. Entries must describe what the above poem is about in 25 words or less. Entries can be emailed to: Jerome.Dausman@ sjca.edu, or mailed in campus mail to Jerome Dausman. All entries must be submitted by midnight of September 10, 2009. Entries will be judged by the Poet Laureate, and the decision of the judge, however misguided, is final. The winning entry will be announced in a subsequent issue of this esteemed publication. ~ By Brendan McGivney '11 little bitch with braces was laughing at some joke I made, "You really remind I'll admit I cried the first hundred me of Kelso from that 70's Show." times I heard "Seasons of Love," but Ashton Fucking Kutcher. Not even then it went the way of "Hey Ya" him, but his slightly brain-damaged and became the same replayed trash. character from some show on FOX That being said, Rent crept into the I'll admit to you at the time I thought hearts and ears of our burgeoning highly of this, I even had an ironic bohemian selves and stayed there trucker hat with some bible quote on proud, aids-ridden, and alternative. it. To this day I'm still struggling to This article is not about that play or figure out what it means to be like the mainstreaming of alternative Kelso. Was I loud? Yes. Did I get lots culture but about me. The biggest of poon? No. Was I retarded? I hope problem I have with Rent is when the not. It doesn't add up. Maybe I was to large black woman comes forward at willing to do anything to get a laugh, the funeral and belts out a numerical but still: what the hell? At around the same chain giving us a In the seventh grade, time, Louis Steven on catalogue to measure our lives. Frankly, cups I had the svelte build of Even Stevens was thrown a twink {Tom the BO's around a lot. Another of coffee, spoons, and love are not enough and the self-righteous loud borderline mentally -challenged kid. Maybe for my personal brand attitude of all middle in the end all the people of self-reflection and who constantly reminded self-loathing. Whether class white kids when we like to admit or they f1.rst -fi.nd punk. Then me of my cultural self were just telling me I not, in today's world it happened... had ADHD. Of course self-reflection doesn't there was also the twins, include a lot of self: we use so many people who looked at me after I got my mediums to see how people take us than figure our selves out from there. glasses and said I looked like everyone I learned at a young age all about this from Buddy Holly (in sophomore phenomenon the first time Daniel year) or Drew Carrey (senior year). Gildea, the chubby kid with an eye In the mirror these people gave me I patch at my lunch table said, "You learned I was gaining weight or just remind me of the kid from Home generally becoming less ... desirable. Alone." I'm sure my bowl cut and No one today would say I look like Shia Cosby sweater made his statement Labeouf or Ashton Kutcher they need true. That's what this article is about, someone bigger, hairier, more absurd. charting your personal growth by the Enter Zack Galifinakis. Have you seen The Hangover? celebrities you remind people of. Remember the bearded brother the on There wasn't a lot of this until MTV came around and sorta fucked it all up with the wolf pack toast-that's him, for me. In the seventh grade, I had the that's where I'm at right now. That svelte build of a twink from the 80's fat fuck really should not have gotten and the self-righteous attitude of all famous, but stayed in the underground middle class white kids when they first stand-up scene where he shined and COLUMNIST find punk. Then it happened: some see MCGIVNEY on pg. 9 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - THE GADFLY 3 �Freshmen Bodies, Freshmen Souls by Bryce Jacobsen '42 FORMER ATHLETIC DIRECTOR The reasons, both physical and metaphysical, why everyone ought to become in our sports program are many. I list a few: 1. We have the best athletic program of any college in the country. 2. Exercise is good for the body...unless you sprain an ankle or something like that.3. Most of us feel better, are more alert, and can get more work done if our bodies are healthy and our souls are relaxed. 4. Friendly competition is one of the really fun things in life. It is good for your soul. 5. Your circle of acquaintances will be greatly enlarged. This is good for the soul, provided you can separate the wheat from the chaff. 6. You will learn to accept, and bear with, thousands of split-second decisions from the officials, a few of which are wrong. This is very good for the soul 7. Do you like to strive for, and achieve, specific goals? If so, consider our college blazers. They are much sought after, and the pathway is clearly laid out. Striving for goals is good for your soul 8. It is probably true that the more pure fun occurs in the athletic program than in any other area of the college. Fun is good for your soul. 9. If you get involved in team sports, and become a "good team player," you have realized that there are things in the universe that are more important than your own ego. This is a great good for your soul. 10. The benefits of exercise and friendly competition, learned while one is young, should be maintained for the rest of your life...i.e, they should become habitual. For virtue, as the 4 THE GADFLY Philosopher said, is a habit. 11. You will get to know numerous alumni, tutors, and staff members who participate in the program. This is good for your soul, or ought to be... provided that they are the proper sort of role models. 12. Our showers are the best at the college; always plenty of hot water. 13. Are you bothered by, or worried by, tobacco fumes in the air? Come to the gym. The whole building is a nicotinefree zone. 14. If you perform some sort of heroic deed on the athletic field, your name will be mentioned in our weekly column. Heroes are always acclaimed. But do not be carried away by this. Remember that "the paths of glory lead but to the grave." 15. A high percentage of our best students are active participants in our program. 16. Those who play, stay. 17. The gym is not particularly well-equipped, as gyms go. But it has washers and dryers, and a coke machine... and I will explain to you, if you ask me, how you can get yourself in tip-top physical shape, without any equipment at all 18. You can sit in an old-time barber's chair in my office ... you can pump yourself up and down, and adjust the slope high or low. Where else can you do that? 19. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. 20. It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness. So there you have it. ..twenty good reasons why you should participate in our athletic program. If you are not convinced by all of this, come and talk to me...I can probably think of some more good reasons. Or better yet, talk with the upperclassmen. They will tell you all sorts of strange, interesting, and wondrous things. ~ (This reprinted article {1.rst appeared in The Gadfly on September 2, 1982. It was re-submitted by our current athletic director, Leo Pickens. We're sure Mr. Pickens is willing to stand in for the {1.rst person voice used in this article and answer any questions you might have about our great athletic program. -Ed.) �The Best Damn Sports Program Period Intramural Musings By JP Synder '10 SPORTS CORRESPONDENT For those of you who do not know me, I am the Senior Captain of the HUSTLERS intramural team and the Assistant Director of Kunai (fancy title for referee of women's sports). Like a few of you out there, coming to St. John's was a bit of step down athletically. We have no real intervarsity sports. Sure, we have the greatest croquet skills in the land (there's your 'shout out' Dan Connelly), a fencing team that meets regularly, a mild-mannered sailing team, and, for those insane enough to get up that early, a crew team that tries very hard to impress everyone. But for those of you whom Friday nights were spent under the lights of a stadium or gym, or you had a reserved seat in front of the TV on Sundays and all of March, be aware that St. John's sports move at a much slower pace. However, do not get too discouraged. Our intramural program is a blast for all of those former athletes and especially anyone who has never considered themselves an ::i athlete. five There are men's intramural teams: The HUSTLERS, The Spartans, The Druids, The Guardians, and some other team, the Greensomethingorothers. If you are a freshman, as Mr. P has told you in his annual speech, you are allocated to one of these teams and we are glad to have you. If you are a transfer student you are allocated as well and just as welcome to come join us. For all you sophomores out there, by the time you read this the draft will have already occurred. However, I am including in this edition of The Gadfly a draft preview so it will be quite interesting to see who made what stupid mistake. This column will probably be a little unpredictable. I have no real set strategy for what I am planning to write. There will probably be a brief weekly recap of kunai events, athlete profiles, schedule postings, and whatever else I feel like writing about from week to week. Look for a weekly Top 10 list varying in seriousness and I am open to How To and Self Help articles if anyone has any suggestions. For you ladies, you have already heard or know all about Kunai. For those that haven't, I cannot stress enough how important it is for you to come out and join us on Tuesday and Friday afternoons. I'll put out my Ode to Kunai in a subsequent article, but for now, just come out and play. There is a camaraderie and sportsmanship unlike anything you have experienced. Plus, you get cool shirts. Also, for the guys, especially the upperclassmen, the Friday afternoon watch party between the fields needs to be reinstated. Kunai is as much a spectator sport as anything else, and who doesn't want to watch a bunch of women running around? There is pickup basketball after seminar every Monday and Thursday. Freshmen: participate as frequently and as early in the year as possible in the intramural and after seminar sports. It is the easiest way to meet and make friends with upperclassmen. The St. John's community is prone to class division and in order to be Our intramural program is a blast for all of those former athletes and especially anyone who has never considered themselves an athlete. a true community of learning, it is imperative that we meld the classes together. The upperclassmen have studied everything you are struggling with now and their advice is invaluable. And, I know it is contrary to intuition, but there are probably some pretty cool freshman out there, so upperclassmen don't take too long to warm up to them. I hope to see you all out on the field. Oh yeah, Huhs-el-errs!!! .....-- THE GADFLY 5 �l An Introductory Guide to Annapolis By Rachel Bargis '09 ALUMNA This is by no means exhaustive. Do go off campus every once and a while -- St. John's tends to be quite the bubble and Annapolis is a sickeningly quaint town well worth exploring. General/Convenience Co&eeShops 1. City Dock Coffee, 71 Maryland Ave. Free wireless. 6:30 AM-6:30 PM 2. City Dock Coffee, 18 Market Space. Free wireless. 6:30 AM-10 PM 3. Hard Bean Coffee & Booksellers, 36 Market Space. Free wireless. 6 AM-10 PM. •••••••••••••••••••• r.================================~ Ice Cream 4. Annapolis Ice Cream Co. 196 Main St. Delicious and interesting flavors (they make their own), good prices. Penguins. Buy anything that has the word 'pie' in it. 5. Storm Bros. Ice Cream Co. 130 Dock St. Good prices on cones . 6. Aromi D'Italia. 6 Dock St. Delicious gelatto and Italian pastries. In the winter be sure to try their Italian Hot Chocolate, made with rich dark chocolate. • • Churches • • • 7. St. Anne's Episcopal Parish. • • Church Circle. 8 AM and 9:45 AM • • • • Sunday services. • : 8. St. Mary's Roman Catholic Church~ • 111 Duke of Gloucester St. 7:00 AM, • • • 8:30 AM, 9:00 AM, 10:30 AM, 12:30 • • PM, 5:30 PM Sunday masses. • • • • 9. First Presbyterian (USA). 171 • : Duke of Gloucester St. 8:30 and • • • 11:00 am Sunday services. • • 10. Calvary United Methodist • • Church. 301 Rowe Blvd. 9 AM • • • • Sunday service. • •••••••••••••••••••• r-----------------------• Restaurants 19. Joss Sushi. 195 Main St. The only place you'll ever need to go to in town for sushi. Delicious and affordable. 20. Galway Bay. 63 Maryland Ave. Solid Irish food. Also has a nice bar with sea shanty nights. 21. Reynolds Tavern. 7 Church Circle. Delightful afternoon teas and lovely dinners. Try the cream of crab soup. 22. Cafe Normandie. 185 Main St. Excellent French cuisine. Good half-price bottle of wine night. 23. Treaty of Paris. 16 Church Circle. Expensive; classy; French cuisine. Not for first dates unless both of you h ave over $100k in your trust fund. 24. Yin Yankee. 105 Main St. Asian Fusion food. Great lunches. Supermarket 25. Graul's Groceries. A 10 minute walk across the College Creek Bridge. ·-----------------------· 11. CVS. 123 Main Street. Convenient but expensive. 12. Main Street Minimart. 222 Main St. Pricey, but open later than CVS and closer than Rite Aid. Sells beer and wine. 13. Rite Aid. Open late. Liquor department also open late . 14. 7-11. Always open. Be safe and take a few friends if you go late at night. The night shift clerk is a living legend. 10 minute walk. 15. Potato Valley. 47 State Circle. Delicious baked potatoes. Slightly pricey, but hella tasty. 16. Subway. 228 Main St . Sometimes a sub is a welcome respite from the dining hall 17. Moe's. 122 Dock St. Chain, think Taco Bell with class. Decent prices. 18. Chick & Ruth's Delly. 165 Main St. Local must-see greasy-spoon institution. Open to at least 11:30 every night. Big milkshakes. Try the St. Johnnie Sandwich. --- 26. Harry Browne's. 66 State Circle. Close, comfortable, Johnnie haven after seminars. 27. Ramshead. 33 West St. Great Happy Hour, Fordham beers on tap. Tasty root beer on tap if you're under 21. •• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Misc• • • • 28. Admiral Cleaners. 10 Taylor Ave. Dry cleaning, tailoring, and laundromat. : 29. Art Things Art Supply Inc. 2 Annapolis St. Fantastically stocked art supply store. Great selection of notebooks and • sketchbooks as well. A must-see. : 30. Annebeth's. 75 Maryland Ave. A must-see Johnnie institution. Fine wines and beers, cheeses, chocolates, gourmet • sodas, and movie rental. Open late! : 31. Mills Fine Wine & Spirits. 87 Main St. An exhaustive selection of wines, liquors, and beers. • 32. The Annapolis Bookstore. 68 Maryland Ave. A magically comfortable store full of new and used books (including • seminar books) . 33. Hats in the Belfry. 103 Main St. Hats are sexy; go buy one. • • 34. Capital Teas. 6 Comhill St. They sell tea. 35. 49 West. Coffee, dessert, and drinks. Pricey, but open after seminar. : • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •• • • •• • • • • • • • • • • • •• • ••••• •••• •• • • •• •• •• ••• • • •• •• • • •• • • • •• 6 THE GADFLY �Not on the map: The Lutheran Mission Society. 230 West St. Small but nice thrift store that always seems to be having some kind of 253 off sale. Twenty minute walk. THE GADFLY 7 �Dodd on the Quad: 33ack to ~chool By Kirstie Dodd '10 hardly worth it-my employer was, after all, someone who hired off of "Back to school," much like "I love Craigslist (which made him inherently you" in the beginning stages of an sketchy), and in the end I thought he unsure relationship, are three words was going to gyp me out of the money that produce equal amounts of we had agreed upon. At least now, excitement and dread. For me, these when I fly somewhere on a plane, I three words evoke the customary can toss around terms like HARP and hours of tax-free clothes shopping and HAMP in stentorian pretentiousness the hard choices I make in reporting and not fear the backlash of mortgage my summer activities: do brokers and lenders in I fudge the truth a little There is something the row behind me who and tell people I worked at that exdtes me about abhor my misinformed a high-paying internship this "Back to School" stupidity. I am a little in Japan with some sumo sad that I wasted a wrestling society (what I business. I cannot good month of my wanted to do), or do I tell wait to show you the youth, which I fear is people I spent most of freshest fl.ake-off-your- rapidly leaving me. At my time watching French ' . . twenty I can already cartoons and segments fork articles lzned up see fine lines around of the highly-televised for this year's Dodd on my eyes and the Michael Jackson Tribute the Quad. beginnings of old lady on YouTube (what I sun spots on the backs of my hands; a friend actually did)? Most of the time I compromise and tell people my suggested beginning an anti-wrinkle summer was "fine," which is one of regimen now, and I might take up her those glorious, ambiguous, anodyne suggestion to quell my ever-increasing English adjectives that means nothing fears about death, and worse, getting and everything. old. There is something that excites me The only thing of note I did this summer was write a book. Actually about this "Back to School" business. I it was an eBook, which is far less cannot wait to show you the freshest, glamorous, butl don'tminddollingthis flake-off-your-fork articles lined up one up for the press. I was searching for this year's Dodd on the Quad. Like Craigslist one day and found a posting my German grandmother, who after for an eBook writer, and a month later, sixty years of living in America, is I had churned out a little booklet on starting to lose her English and enjoys loan modification. It was grueling and stealing stale bread rolls from The Golden Corral, I am turning into an eccentric version of my once normal, well-adjusted self. This year, expect articles from a variety of subjects. I've been thinking about everything from the end of the world, Gaston Leroux, and school uniforms, to the art of the Russian novel, the possible benefit of reading outside sources, and the purpose of satirical journalism. Heck, I even might throw in an end-of-theyear "meta-article" entitled something horrible like "What is Dodd on the SENIOR EDITOR 8 T HE GADFLY Quad?" to solidify my feelings of selfworth and personal legacy here at the college. I was originally going to write this article about my advice for the beginning of the school year, but I've already spent most of a page airing out my anxiety about being a young adult and living with my parents over the summer, so I'll just leave my advice as a charming after-thought: hang up those college posters early (the Animal House one, that one of Audrey Hepburn, the cover of Abbey Road, etc.), make a new friend, try not to turn the first essay in late, and take your tutors out to lunch, or even better, coffee. Most of the time they like to pay. ~- - - - - - - -- - - - - - McGivneys Look-ALike Tribulations cont.frompg.3 stayed away from becoming a star. I never in my wildest dreams believed that a big bearded modern day Andy Kauffman would climb so close to a cultural zeitgeist. When I saw the movie afterwards, you could tell everyone around sorta gave me a sly look then I said to my friends, "I -am like a celebrity because I have a big belly and a bigger beard". Sure enough the rest of the summer, "You are just like that guy from The Hangover?" Don't tell me that, a grown ass man doesn't want to be compared to an almost-autistic dude. I'm not Rainman, nor was meant to be. All my life there seems to be this connection between me and men of eccentricity that borders on complete lunacy-I like to think I'm more self-aware than all these quixotical queens. People don't tend to flatter when they start a sentence of, "You remind me of...", but I think it's a hell of a better way of comparing yourself than to the raving of a bunch of twenty-something junkies.~ �The Form of Good: Beginnings By Andrew Mize '12 CONTRIBUTOR I thought it fitting in many ways to launch this column with the topic of "beginnings". Last night in my first sophomore seminar, we discussed the beginning of the Bible, which describes the genesis of the whole universe. After reading about such an event, I began to ponder about what good there is in beg'mmngs. In reading about humanity in the Garden of Eden, I focused my thoughts on the extraordinarily great potential that existed in Eden in the very beginning. With eternal sadness we can only imagine the great times Adam and Eve could have had in Eden had they not made the c...1-ioice to eat of the tree of t.lie knowledge of good and evil. They had the potential to be blameless and happy, but with a lust for God's wisdom and the bite of an apple, it was lost. Although not so important or final, Llie potential that all of us have at the start of this new year is in many ways like Adam and Eve's. From the freshman who are learning their way about campus to the seniors who are trying to learn their way off, a potential exists with every choice-concerning friendships, the intramurals, the Program, a healthy lifestyle, etc. .. These choices will determine how enjoyable or not this year will be. And so like the pre-apple Garden of Eden, the beginning of the school year more than any other time is when a healthy, happy year can be effectively planned and shaped. And that makes it good, something to be thought of wit.."l-i. a smile. I also find good in beginnings with the implications of their very existence. Begi.TIDings beget endings and vice versa in the interminable tides of time. The school year cannot begin if the su.."'llmer does not end, the summer cannot begin if the school year does not end. Tnis demonstrates the impermanence of all things, good and bad. When one considers that fact as concerns Genesis a."'1.d the separation of hu..."nanity from the divine, it comforts and provides hope for the future. In the end, beginnings are a time to rejuvenate ourselves. By taki..."'1.g a few deep breaths and preparing our minds, we ca.-ri. start off the school year right, entering the classroom with an open mind and something to say. But hopefully we can also see the divine good in them and take the time to inwardly celebrate the limitless potential for hu.."'llans to change for the better. In t..lris way we can be masters of our own destiny and turn that potential into a memorable actuality. ...... THE NEWEST EDITION IN THE LINE OF JOHNNIE NEWSPAPERS SPANNING MORE THAN A QUARTER CENTURY, THE GADFLY IS WHERE THE AVERAGE ST. JOHN'S STUDENT GOES FOR THE NEWS WHICH HE CARES ABOUT MEETINGS ARE HELD EVERY FRIDAY AT 7PM IN THE LOWER LEVEL OF THE BAR BUCHANAN CENTER. ALL ARE WELCOME TO ATTEND. THE GADFLY 9 �By John Blechl, '10 Turn This Dorm Contributor In order to live, we have to die a perfectly soft, the light that has kept full for us to move. Maybe we have us protected and safe all those years, a thirsty desire to travel; maybe we little. When we look forward, my friends, has a sense of enclosure that we, on have a nagging need to try something we lose sight of the past. This is exciting the one hand, wish not the leave, but new. Maybe we feel fear first, maybe anticipation. Maybe we follow the and terrifying because we leave what on the other, must. we know, what is routine and comfortable (and possibly dull) for the hoped for, the unexpected, the new. Life, of course, moves forward whether we wish it to or not and we, in order to be alive, move with it. While January is the double-faced month, August, for us, is our New Year. Whatever home is, it is home. It is the place that we know, the place we find our roots, the place that we stamp ourselves upon Maybe we leave a place full of tears steps of others. Maybe we are blazing everything. From the streets that we and bad memories. Maybe the cold a new path. have memorized to the buildings that and harshness of what has pushed When we make the journey to have become immortalized, home against the walls is the thing that these ancient and glorious buildings, is what we know. Yet that home, is suffocating us. Maybe the people we watch as home quickly :Bees in the in all of its g r a n d e u r , - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - rear-view mirror but begins to feel small and Maybe we leave a place that is full of light and wait impatiently as restricting; we do not warmth. The bedroom in the house that we have grown un in, that little room saturated with all r those old symbols ofold experiences... want to feel completely circumscribed and stagnant. Maybe we leave a place that is full of light and warmth. The bedroom in the house that we have grown up in, that· little room saturated with all those old symbols of old experiences, from the pictures on our mirrors, the pillow that is 10 THE GADFLY have grown small, sharp, and puerile. Maybe we run away from that very mirror that reminds us that we are who we are. Maybe home is a place empty and broken; maybe it is a place too College Avenue seems to :Bee in the other direction. But this shining College cannot escape us for long, and the miles are checked off the list like days on the calendar. At the threshold of campus is not Cerberus but Beatrice smiling with hand extended. Shutting the door of home takes the greatest effort that we can suffer. �INTO A HOME But that door must be shut, that life must be given up for a new one. Even if we are not acutely aware of the consequences of inaction, we are compelled to forsake one life for another. What of this other life? If a returning student, we have some advantage: we can simply slide from one established life into another. In most cases, we :find that returning to the life before St. John's is the difficult part; returning to campus is our homecoming. What of our newest colleagues? Can we not immediately remember the fear and anticipation that we ourselves felt the first few days of being students? The moment that our parents leave us alone in our room, the strange noises of voices that are not familiar, the sight of faces of strangers, the whirlwind of chaos and exhilaration spread over days and nights of constant stimuli, leaves us, if nothing else, breathless. We, as returning students, get to relive that moment through others; others get to experience it for the :first time. We replace one bed for another, one light for another, one mirror for another. Things from home only remind us that we are not there anymore. We have found a new home, a new place, full of wonder and strangeness. We slowly forget who we were as we realize who we are becoming. Whether we are starting, continuing, or completing this process here, we stand as breathing benchmarks to something far greater than our silly bodies and fertile minds. We are growing up, out, and inward. We place our hand on someone else's, or shun from another's, but still we move on. Regardless of our reason, we all walk through the door of this blessed Institution as equals. We share a commonality with complete strangers and friends. We have decided, for whatever reason, to turn ourselves to a Liberal Education. It is that promise that has moved us from our homes. It is that goal that guides our steps. Our books are our standard. We pick up the struggle, we dust off the dream, smirk, and begin the grindstone. Today will be tomorrow's yesterday, and we, as passengers and coachmen, continue to breathe. Everyday we go further from where we started. If we pause to remember that starting point, we wonder where our loved ones have gone and where we are going. We begin to see photographs of old faces that are missing something and we eventually realize that we are that something. We recall experiences here and wonder if such things could have happened without us. One place fades and another becomes illuminated. We cannot be in two places at once; we have made our decision because we !mow what the other option holds. Beauty is found in both. We give ourselves to hope, to trust, to faith. Here, in this Home, we have an opportunity that is so rare and pure thattheweightofwhat was is overpowered by what could be. Janus simply nods. We have the support of those loved ones that we have left as well as the loved ones that we. have found here. We are surrounded by light and toil, by success and progress, and by a star still further out. We can taste the sweetness of a spring that can only be found within these walls, we can feel a heat from our work and a breeze of earned relaxation. New friends constantly talk to us, help us, lift us up and settle us down. Let us defeat the fear in our breasts concerning the old; let us conquer the gauntlet that our Program wisely offers; let us be weary of the pitfalls that will sweet-talk us downward. We have the chance to be reborn again. What greater adventure could we ever wish to undertake? ......- THE GADFLY 11 �12 THE GADFLY � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 12 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Senior Editor) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 1 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-08-31 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Number 1 of The Gadfly. Published Monday, 31 August 2009. (Misnumbered as XXI, Issue No. 1). Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.1 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/4a4f89f981e84bb5df9f150bc84ecad1.pdf 85737dc9927037909f3ae188e7bb8cee PDF Text Text AD FLY VOLUME XXXI, N°. 2 ST. JOHN'S COLLEGE, ANNAPOLIS, MARYLMTD 21401 MONDAY, 7 SEPTEMBER 2009 {CITY} St. John's, Meet Annapolis At the end of the Red-Brick Road Andrew Thomas Davenport '10 CONTRIBu'TOR from the San Francisco Coming and having never beenBay to occasional special feature about how to get the best out of whatever sport you choose to come out and play. This week, we will st.art simply with the two men's intramural games that have been played prior to the Friday deadline of the Gadflv, namelv the AtJ1enian Reason Ball g~e betwe~ the Green Waves and the Guardians and the Ulrimate (Frisbee) game between the Spartans and the hustlers. For those of you who may be unaware of what Athenian. Reason Ball is, it is the St. John's version of flag football v;,1.th a number of heavv modifications; for instance, an unlimited amount of forward passing, variable field goal point values, and a little quirk called ''hyper-time". In Wednesday's game, there was a superabundance of glory, especially for the first ga.,.'lle of t.1-ie season. The Mighty Green Waves scored on their third play from scrimmage, connecting four passes in a :row that s~"'i:ed from three yards in front of their own endzone, with the scoring catch made by Kevin }Jtman, a Area, the East Coast other than for a week in New York City, I was struck by this quaint, brick town. I had just spent the last year living in San Francisco in one of the grittier neighborhoods, and I had spent several years before t..11.at traveling both domestically and intematioruilly (I started at St. John's when I was 22). I was smug and felt secure from whatever might come my way. I scoffed at the campus security warnings about muggings downtown. All I saw around me was a wealthy tourist-trap college-town. In three years, though, I have learned that this is only a thin veneer worn for the sake of company, and that there is much more to this town than even some of the locals might want to admit. Annapolis is a segregated and fractured community, plagued by crime and a murder rate three times the national average. Wedged between the cracks that so many of Anne Arundel County's unseen and underprivileged fall through are the thirteen housing projects that rr:akr the county number one in the nation in per capita public housing. As Trudy McFall, cu..."'":rent mavoral candidate and founder of Citizens' for a Better ~..\nnapolis, puts it: "One of the most important contributions of the ICY....A work may be that it makes it clear t..11.at Annapolis has and should take full :responsibility for the policing in public housing communities. For too long Annapolis has treated our public housing areas as if they were 'federal :reservations' and the city }1as not given them a level of policing t..hat is appropriate for the crimes that are committed there" (The Capital, 6/16/08). I'm not telling you this for your safety; I'll leave that to campus security. I see SALE, pg. 5 seeDAVKWORT,pg. 8 Matthew Young ('12) and Billy (or Tony) Peccraro ('12) celebrate Reality hosted Seducers & Conuptors 2009. {THE WEEK} Intraniural Recapitulation Robert Sale '10 SPORTS CORRESP01'."DE!'•,"f come to my attention that I ofhasyour impressionable minds some have t been exposed to an a..'"ticle written by a Mr. JP Snyder, a capt.a.in of an intramural team whose rui.me most certainlv does not need to be capitalized. Na'tural.ly, there was much good in what he wrote about the intramural sports program, as it drives all of those who participate in it to a nobility of soul :rarely seen outside these walls. However, one cannot escape a cerT"...ai.n bias when one is writing about an activity in which there are w..nners (like the Green Waves) and those who do not win (the hustlers,· for example). Thus I have t.a.ken it upon myself to do what small part I could to correct the pro-hustler sports page leaning that would most certainly besrnirch the fair and balanced nature of the Gadfly. In my colurnn, you may expect to see a just treatment of the men's intramural games that have occurred in the past week, as well as current standings and even perhaps an �WRITING HOME THE GADFLY Senior Editor Kinnie Dodd Jtmior Editor Patrick Beeby Layout F.ditx>IS Elizabeth Spagnoletti XeeoanTro= PholX>gi:ophy F.ditx>t Chloe Ginsburg Business M.mgtt Mazin Skobndic Conttibu= Dobert Sak An<hew Davcapon JPSnydct !llicbadl.a<:y An<hewlllizc Paul Moa:ill F ounded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly distributed free to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus as well as tutors emeriti, members of the Boards of VtSitors and Governors, and the offices at the St. John's Santa Fe campus. Opinions expressed within are the sole responsiliility of the author(s). The Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, informative, and thought-provoking newspaper which ci!cumstances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and spelling in most cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. The Gadfly meets every Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the Barr-Buchanan Center. All articles are due at 11:59 PM every Friday. For display advertisement prices and information, contact Marin Skokandic at marin.skokandic@ sjca.edu. 2 THE GADFLY D ear Mother, Yesterday I received the package you sent me. As I was opening it in my dorm room, a song was playing in which a man was warned by his mama that there'll be days like this. "There'll be days like this," his mama said. It might sound insignificant, but it was very comforting to know that there are other folks out there who struggle with these kinds of things too. Guess we're just lucky to have mamas like you! In other words, thanks again for the plastic sheets. I agree that they won't solve the real problem, for as you said, they will shield me from the costs of replacing a school mattress, but they will do little to shield me from my shame-still, it's a start. School's okay so far. As usual, all of my classmates are jealous of me, so I pretty much keep to myself like you recommended. It's tough to be a senior with only three and three-fifths friends, but until everyone else can let go of their damn pride, there's not much I can do for them. Fortunately, things are looking better on the other end of the table as my tutors continue to think I'm the coolest. None of them can really pronounce my name, but only one this year insists that the proper French pronunciation is "Loser." The other kids laugh when he says it, because they too suspect that he doesn't know the language. It's nice of them to defend me, but I do feel it's a bit rude to the tutor to laugh in his face like that. Things are just starting to gear up around campus. From what I hear, The Gadfly has resumed publication. Don't know if you remember or not, but it fell to pieces last year when Dinosaur JL got all hlgh and mighty with my Hamlet poem. Nobody could really get behind a student weekly after they printed his article. Again, I appreciate ON SMOKING {LETTERS} I n my first minutes arou..11d campus since registration, I the show of solidarity, but to doom an age-old institution just because of one man's slip-up seems a bit rash. I suppose it all worked out though, since that little ginger girl is starting it up again. That's right, Kristie's in charge of it now-remember, the one you called "moonface" at convocation? She seemed nice enough when I recommended that she make their new slogan "Ouch! That really smarts!" But I'll wait and see if she uses it or not before I pass judgment on whether she truly is "nice enough." Oh, and good news! I know that you've been racked with residual parental guilt over how many trans fats I absorbed from all those chicken McNuggets you let me eat as a kid, so I thought you'd like to know that I no longer touch the stuff! In fact, I'm now the only actual vegetarian in the vegan/vegetarian club. At least that's what the archon, Caity Swanson, told me. Although to be honest, it is was difficult to make out exactly what she was telling me through all the shrimps and beef bits she was spraying from her mouth. (Oh, and if you forgot, "archon" is the word we use for our club leaders so as to remind upper classmen that Greek is part of the curriculum and to entice the freshmen into joining some of the less prestigious, more socially debilitating clubs like melee and waterboarding.) Well, I have a lot of reading to do, so I guess that's it for now, mom. It turns out that I was wrong about having one seminar on War and one on Peace, and now I'm really behind. I know I have no right to complain though- I was given fair warning. After all, mama said there'll be days like this! Love, Gabe -Gabriel Ltzjer heard a conversation between some new freshman and a few upperclassmen. This conversation was centered on smoking. Many freshman might notice St. John's students smoking on the quad, on some stoop, perhaps even pacing around with a pipe and bowtie. At St. Johns, we love to live in the past, thinking about questions of the past which are still relevant today. While smoking was in the past a sexy, cool, and important part of pop culture, it is no longer relevant in the same sense. Smoking today is a sign of low class, ignorance, and vice. Smoking makes you look like a fool I shudder when I see that even some tutors smoke on campus. This poor example should not be followed. I urge incoming freshman to focus on looking respectable to the public as a whole, including their peers and tutors, rather than trying to look cool for the buffoons that are not worth your time impressing. Most students who smoke aren't serious, and most serious students who smoke become less so as a result. Or, as King James I says in A Counterblaste to Tobacco, "For such is the force of that natural self-love in every one of us, and such is the corruption of envy bred in the breast of every one as we cannot be content unless we imitate every thing that our fellows do, and so prove ourselves capable of every thing whereof they are capable, like apes counter feiting the manners of others to our own destruction." -folio Santa-Rita DEMANDS Snyder's I n JPrefers to recent article, he SJC's "mildmannered sailing team." We demand the statement be retracted. We are not mildmannered, and we believe life is worth living, Mr. SnydeL -The St. Johns Sailing Team �{POEM} Dying for Ideas Tutor Adam Schulman translates Georges Brassens' Mourir pour des idees (1972) Mourir pour des idees, l'idee est excellente Moi j'ai failli mourir de ne l'avoir pas eu' Car tous ceux qui l'avaient, multitude accablante En hurlant a la mort me sont tombes dessus ' Ils ont su me convaincre et ma muse insolente Abjurant ses erreurs, se rallie a leur foi Avec un soupc,;:on de reserve toutefois Mourrons pour des idees, d'accord, mais de mort lente, D'accord, mais de mort lente Jugeant qu'il n'y a pas peril en la demeure Allons vers l'autre monde en flanant en chemin Car, a forcer l'allure, il arrive qu'on meure Pour des idees n'ayant plus cours le lendemain Or, s'il est une chose amere, desolante En rendant l'ame a Dieu c'est bien de constater Qu'on a fait fausse route, qu'on s'est trompe d'idee Mourrons pour des idees, d'accord, mais de mort lente D'accord, mais de mort lente Les saint jean bouche d'or qui prechent le martyre Le plus souvent, d'ailleurs, s'attardent ici-bas Mourir pour des idees, c'est le cas de le dire C'est leur raison de vivre, ils ne s'en privent pas Dans presque tous les camps on en voit qui supplantent Bientot Mathusalem dans la longevire ]'en conclus qu'ils doivent se dire, en aparte ''Mourrons pour des idees, d'accord, mais de mort lente D'accord, mais de mort lente" Des idees reclamant le fameux sacrifice Les sectes de tout poil en offrent des sequelles Et la question se pose aux victimes novices Mourir pour des idees, c'est bien beau mais lesquelles? Et comme toutes sont entre elles ressemblantes Quand il les voit venir, avec leur gros drapeau Le sage, en hesitant, toume autour du tombeau Mourrons pour des idees, d'accord, mais de mort lente D'accord, mais de mort lente Encor s'il suffisait de quelques hecatombes Pour qu'enfin tout changeat, qu'enfin tout s'arrangeat Depuis tant de "grands soirs" que tant de tetes tombent Au paradis sur terre on y serait deja Mais l'age d'or sans cesse est remis aux calendes Les dieux ont toujours soi.£ n'en ont jamais assez Et c'est la mort, la mort toujours recommencee Mourrons pour des idees, d'accord, mais de mort lente D'accord, mais de mort lente 0 vous, les boutefeux, o vous les hons apotres Mourez done les premiers, nous vous cedons le pas Mais de grace, morbleu! laissez vivre les autres! La vie est a peu pres leur seul luxe ici bas Car, enfin, la Camarde est assez vigilante Elle n'a pas besoin qu'on lui tienne la faux Plus de danse macabre autour des echafauds! Mourrons pour des idees, d'accord, mais de mort lente D'accord, mais de mort lente Dying for ideas, that's an excellent idea. Me, I nearly died of not having it, Because all those who had it, an overwhelming multitude, Fell upon me howling, ''To the death!" They knew how to convince me, and my insolent muse, Renouncing her errors, rallied to their faith With, however, a suspicion of reserve: Let's die for ideas, all right, but by a slow death; All right, but by a slow death. Judging that there's no danger in staying home, ·Let's go toward the other world dawdling on the road, Because, by forcing the pace, one could end up dying For ideas that are no longer current the following day. Now if there's one thing that's bitter and distressing, In rendering one's soul to God, it's to note well That one took a false route, got hold of the wrong idea. Let's die for ideas, all right, but by a slow death; All right, but by a slow death. Besides, the St. John Chrysostoms who preach martyrdom Most often get delayed down here. Dying for ideas, it has to be said, Is their reason for living; they're not going to give that up. In almost all the camps one sees those who'll soon Take Methusaleh's place for longevity. I conclude from this that they must tell themselves, aside, ''Let's die for ideas, all right, but by a slow death; All right, but by a slow death." For ideas demanding the ultimate sacrifice Sects of every shade offer their consequences; And the question poses itself to novice victims: "Dying for ideas, it's quite beautiful, but for which ones?" And as they all resemble one another, When he sees them coming, with their big banner, The wise man, hesitating, takes a tum around the tomb. Let's die for ideas, all right, but by a slow death; All right, but by a slow death. Yet if some hecatombs were all that were needed For everything finally to change, finally to arrange itself, After so many "great evenings," so many heads falling, One would have already reached paradise on earth. But the golden age without end is put off indefinitely, The gods are always thirsty, they never have enough of it, And it's death, death, always starting again. Let's die for ideas, all right, but by a slow death; All right, but by a slow death. 0 you firebrands, 0 you good apostles, Go and die first, we yield the place to you. But by the grace, morbleu! let the others live! Life is just about their only luxury down here, Because, in the end, Death is vigilant enough, H e doesn't need anyone to hold the scythe, Or any more macabre dances around the scaffold! Let's die for ideas, all right, but by a slow death; All right, but by a slow death. ~ THE GADFLY 3 �{ATHLETES OF THE WEEK} {INTRAMURALS} Scores {ATHLETICS} Dear Kunai ... Are you there, girls? It's me, JP. JP Snyder '10 SPORTS CORRESPONDENT O h, how I love you! Let me count the ways. One ... umm... well, this may take more thought than I originally anticipated. My time spent with Kunai has always been a love/hate relationship. I guess you could say that I've had a crush on her since the beginning. I remember way back during my freshman year when I spied her from the quad. She was running around in the rain, completely oblivious to my presence. Her long legs, panting bosom and smile revealed that she knew exactly who she wa-s ·and what· she stood for; I was hooked. I sidled up to her, shiveringunder my umbrella, and then it happened. Our eyes met; it was love at first sight. We took our courtship slow to start out. I'd come by every so often, making sure she had her space, but letting her know I was around. Then the next year, we made it official. I took the open gym assistant job, and we've been inseparable ever since. That first year, as most newlyweds experience, was blissfully awkward. I learned about her and she attempted to adjust to me. I found myself picking up after her, let4 THEGADFLY Johnnie Fleming '12 Reason Ball ting her boss me around, and is an appropriate name. enjoying just being enveloped The summer came, and The Hustlers silently apin her warmth. It was defi- we spent some time apart. I proached, strangled, and burnitely a learning period. We came to the realization that ied the bodies of the Sparboth didn't know much about our previous arrangement tans, 30-6. The Guardians, soccer, so we kind of found would no longer work. If we summoning up the potent our way together. When were going to stay committed spirits of their dead relatives, basketball came around, she during my final year here, we totally beat the Druids, who was obstinate and didn't care would have to come together had summoned less powermuch for my help. I chalked as equals. That being said, I ful familial powers, 20-14. this up to us still getting to will no longer pick up after Finally, the Greeriwaves ran know each other and working her. I will assert myself when around faster and threw the out the kinks. We ended the necessary for her betterball farther than the Guardians, 40-34. year still committed but real- ment. So far things seem to izing there would be tough be working out nicely. We are Soccer times ahead. planning two trips together The Druids and the GreenOur second official year this year and are working on together went very smoothly. even more after hours alone waves tied, 1-1. The Guardians and the Spartans also I felt like Kunai had finally time. Hopefully, with her full tied, 2-2. started to warm up to me. I cooperation, we can rekindle still picked up her things and that flame. Plus the fact that Ultimate Frisbee did .all of her bitch work, but she gets a face lift every year I feel like she was now open certainly doesn't hurt. The Hustlers ingested, made to my input and advice. We Seriously, though. We only a hearty effort to savor, and started scheduling alone time had 46 girls come out to Ku- finally spat out the Spartans, together on Sundays were we nai on Friday. Unacceptable. 11-7. could work on improving our Our goal is to have 94 girls . - - - - - - - - - - - - - - , relationship. We even took show up at least once. Fresh{FROM THE HEALTH CENTER} a trip to D.C. It was magi- man, this is mainly your recal. I felt like things were sponsibility. At St. John's we Seasonal Flu Shots really coming together for strive for knowledge for the Free to Students us. And then the unthink- sake of knowledge. Kunai able happened. She chose is the only place you will find $5 for Faculty and Staff another man over me! All be- sport for the sake of sport. cause of my assumed lack of Everyone is friendly and When: dance skills, I guess she never could care less whether you Tuesday, September 8 watched me limbo or polka. I are good or not. Plus you'll (10AM-1PM) was hurt. Everything we had get some sun and work up a Monday, September 14 been through meant noth- sweat. And males, as I said (1PM-4PM) ing to her. I was just another before, it behooves you to guy to look after her, another convince the women to play Where:FSK notch on the belt. Hell bitch so you can watch. ....,. �{THE FORM OF GOOD} Ti1ne Capsules Andrew Mize '12 COLUMNIST Somewhere earl.yin the dol-I drums of last summer capsule that is built for the intended recipient of future arrived at a recurring epipha- generations. No, we decided ny that life is as short as it is we would craft this one for precious. At this I suggested ourselves, our future selves. to my glrlfriend, "Let's build The next day we rode our a ti.me capsule." In conversing wave of excitement over to excitedly about this we decid- the local Lowe's, where we ed that we did not, however, purchased the materials to want to make the typical ti.me forge the capsule: one 36-----------------------, {FROM PAGE ONE} Sale's Take On Th.is Week's Events plucky freshman with hands like a bear trap. The Guardians, however, were not to be trifled with and connected two straight scoring drives to give them a 16-8 lead. After trading touchdowns again before halftime, at the break the score stood at 22-16, Guardians in the lead. The second half started even more explosively than the first - the Indomitable Green Waves returned the kickoff for a touchdown, followed by the staunch Guardians returning the next kick for a touchdown. With neither two-point conversion successful, the Guardians kept the lead at 28-22. The Green Waves knocked at the scoring door many ti.mes during the second half, but an excellent defensive effort led by Jon Ragsdale and firstround pick Linus Feder (who finished the game with three interceptions) kept the game firmly in their hands until the very end. With the score reading 34-28 in favor of the Guardians, it ended up coming down to the last play of the game. A botched pitch led the quarterback of the Green Waves to scramble and heave an unplanned, desperation pass that landed right into the arms of sleeper pick Liam Wallace to tie the game at 34. With yet another unsuccess- fu.l two-point conversion, the game headed into suddendeath overtime. In overtime, the Green Waves elected to receive the kick, but after failing to score, possession turned over to the spirited Guardians. Yet here the erstwhile porous Green Wave defense held strong; the Guardians were forced to punt. This ti.me, the Green Waves were ready, connecting a series of passes on second down that brought them to the one-yard line. A successfu.l stand by the Guardians on third down was quickly negated on the next play by a short, over-the-top pass to Graduate Institute student Lee, who dodged his way into the endzone and into the annals of St John's intt.amural glory. The Incomparable Green Waves carried the-day. In other news, the Spartans were defeated in what was surely an underhanded way by the hustlers in Ultimate. Better luck next ti.me, Spartans. That's all for now, except to remark that Mr. Snyder's draft board turned out to be amusing but inaccurate in a numher of significant ways. I can only say that it is fortunate that his athletic prowess far outstrips his prognosticating powers. Until next week, may everything be ad mt.Yorem undarum viridium gloriam. 'I"' inch piece of 4-inch-diameter PVC pipe, two appropriately sized couplings (with screw on lids), PVC glue, and PVC primer. Actually making it was the most crucial step as our get-up-and-go was of the typical bottomless summer level. Over the next few weeks, we made lists of what to put inside. To descnbe the ti.mes, we added magazines, popular news articles, and some of Newsweek's 2009 top 10 lists. To convey ourselves, we put in lists of our favorites (songs, websites, foods, etc ... ), an empty bottle of Ale8-1 (the locally popular Kentucky-made ginger ale equivalent), locks of hair, letters to ourselves, a thumb drive with audio files of our voices, and copies of our signatures. To provide some surprise we also added an assortment of random things the specifics of which I cannot recall. And so finally, with the top lid screwed down, literally a few days before we packed up the Jeep to head to Maryland, we had it prepared for burial. But where? It could not go on any privately-owned property that could be sold. I had imagined romantically of a serene glade tucked away on the yonder reaches of some ancient farm, but at the rate at which the Bluegrass is being churned up and stamped with cookie-cutter house foundations, we were hesitant. So we turned our shovels to the last resort: a public park. Despite the possible illegality of it, we figured the costs and, in the end, enjoyed the heightened sense of adventure. The ti.me capsule's final resting place was just off of a pathway in the middle of a stand of four straight and skinny trees (we were also sure to get the coor- What's worth preserving? Forwhom? And why? dinates). Our only real scare came from a paralyzed man out for an evening stroll The quadriplegic, flanked by two mates, quietly hummed on by as he jokingly said, ''Looks like we've come up a crime scene, boys." But what good is a ti.me capsule? It is, most literally, a container of physical items that will hopefully one day trigger memories that, in the process of time, were hidden away, corrupted, and made inaccessible without some hard copy cue. From that recall I hope to see how I have changed and compare the differences in who I was with who I am at that ti.me. But most exciting to me is knowing that I will be able tp examine what about me has stayed the same. My outside layers that form and are shed away will be more recognizable, and the core of my true personality will be clearer. In essence, I think it will help me analyze who I really am. However steeped in theoretical good, though, making a time capsule is above all else an activity. Without actually crafting, filling, and dumping the thing, no real good could have come. In twenty five years when we remember to go dig up our ti.me capsule, the greatest good will not come from an understanding of the brevity of life or of who I am. That sounds so serious. It will, I trust, come from the sheer joy of finding and rummaging through that old ti.me capsule, with all its well-preserved novelties. And if something happens to go wrong (say our devious witness and his goons dig it up), at the very least it was a summer saved from the endless evils of boredom and complacency.~ THE GADFLY 5 �(a book not on the Program). Curiouser and curiouser? Bate that breath! There are stranger things yet to unfurl. For example, underneath the virtue phrase there is the date "1793" in Roman numerals. But in the middle of the circle rests the strangest thing of all: a large pyramid of rubble with the McDowell cupola or something that looks like Bramante's tiempietto at the top. At the bottom of the rubble there is a little man (St. John of Patmos maybe? Francis Scott Key?) either using a dagger to climb to the top or stabbing the rubble with a Rene won. Why is the of- cross. According to the adminficial seal different? To get down to the bottom of this istration, in 1793 the library mystery, I decide to do some was moved to the cupola "roving reporting" like a true room where it stayed for a newspaperwoman, which few years. True to form, howmeans I get out of bed on a ever, they refuse to comment Saturday and walk down to about the image in the cenGreenfield Library. Discov- ter, and my laboratory tests ering that my "Harriet the remain inconclusive about Spy Role Playing Magnifying the dagger/ cross debate. EiGlass" is missing from my ther way, the image is an acdesk, I begin to suspect foul ceptance of dangerous and play. Did someone not want potentially lethal rock climbme to find out why the seal ing methods, or a desire to was changed? Do I smell a appropriate religious symbolconspiracy theory? Am I be- ogy and attach violence to the ing followed? Am I about to crucifix. Things at this point are become the next Dan Brown? I find a formaldehyde- getting suspicious. I hastscented book (it will remain ily skim Rene's philosophical unnamed to protect its pri- works for guidance and clues. vacy) in the basement with Seeing that I am getting nothe old seal on the inside left where, I turn to the new seal cover. It, like the new seal, is for answers. Let us consider it circular. Nice and shapely and for a moment. Many of you divine. Around the edge, it are familiar with the burnt features the Latin phrase "Si- orange image with the words gillum Commune Collegii St. ''Facio Liberos Ex Liberis Johannis Cannapole in Mary- Libris Libraque" around the landia." My rusty Latin is able outside. 50% extols the seven to eke out: "Common Seal of tenets of the classical liberal St. John's College in Annapo- arts education, and 50% is lis, Maryland." Informative, an esoteric pun on a homoappropriate. On the inside phonetic Latin word. In fact, of the circle there is more the misuse of the Latin One Latin (mcreases pretentious- word with the root ''Lib-" has ness) across the top in a band: been a staple of Latin teach"invia virtuti est nulla via" or, ers' water cooler humor for "for virtue, no way is barred." hundreds of years. Like the This is a highly suspicious old seal, the new seal also flaphrase to use in a SJC seal be- grantly uses Latin, a language cause it is in Latin (a language we have no business knowing we do not learn) and comes about. In the center of the from Ovid's Metamorphoses seal, there are seven books {DODD ON THE QUAD} Seal of Approval? One girl's quest to discover the esoteric meaning behind the St. John's seal. Kirstie Dodd '10 SENIOR EDITOR "T'1be more time one spends l. at St. John's, the more one forgets about all of the sights on campus that once dazzled and bewitched one's prospie eyes. Today I would like to remind us of something that we have forgotten about, something that lurks in every comer of campus. It's there when we walk to Mellon for that harrowing 9 am, it primly waits for us in the upper left hand comer of our St. John's financial letterheads, and it graces many a fanatical parent's Subaru. Yes, we have forgotten about you, Mr. St. John's Seal, and it is time for you to once again bask in the limelight. You may recall the following events from your St. John's College History 101 course you took last semester: (1) Humphrey's basement was a Civil War morgue, (2) George Washington picked lint off his jacket near ChaseStone, (3) ''Temple Iglehart" was a WWI training facility, and (4) The college changed its official seal. When I took the course, I was never concerned with the first three events, because they are standard protocol for any old mid-Atlantic liberal arts college. But the fourth event troubled me for many nights: the seal we see today was not always the official seal. The angel on my right shoulder (Dante) told me to leave it alone. "These things are divine mysteries," he whispered into my ear, with a kind of sultry Antonio Banderas voice. The devil on my left shoulder (Rene Descartes) begged me to ask the one question I always want to ask: PORQUOI. 6 THE GADFLY representing the quadrivium (geometry, arithmetic, music, astronomy) and the trivium (grammar, rhetoric, logic). But when was the last time you used arithmetic at St. John's, or logic for that matter? And so I finally pinpoint the reason why the seal was changed from the little man with his rock pile to the streamlined seal we have today: the scale in the center. On the St. John's website and in St. John's propaganda they send to high school seniors, the byline is "in the center is the scale, representing science." Science as in science doesn't make sense, because we don't do science at St. John's. Science as in knowledge makes more sense, but to get to that conclusion I had to use more of that Latin I'm not supposed to know. No, ladies and gentlemen, the real reason why the scale is there in the center of the seal is because everything this school is based on is a Nietzschean conspiracy. If you haven't checked your astrological charts lately, let me remind you that Nietzsche was born on October 15th, 1844, making him a Libra. The symbol of Libra? The SCALE of justice. This symbol, embedded in the center of a Latin language joke, surrounded by some disciplines we don't even touch, teaches us one crucial thing, the thing that the secret seal changers wanted us to know but couldn't tell us outright: we, like Nietzsche, can criticize Plato. Tonight I'm keeping one eye open for the administration's ninjas, and I advise you to do the same.~ l �{OPINION} An Ongoing Trial of Liberal ducation l\lichael Thomas Lacy '12 COLU:l\.lliil:ST n August The O Washington 27th, pubPost lished an article entitled ''.,.A,.n Education Debate for the Books." The piece focused on the dwindling applications to St. John's College as well as other small liberal ar..s schools. The paper reported a 15% admissions drop at SJC since last school year, lamenting that never "have families weighed the value of a liberal education mo.re carefullv than in the 2009-10 admissi~ns cycle." The paper quoted two freshmen when they moved into their Randall dorms. They fearlessly defended the St. John's curriculum, one saying he r..ad to convince his grandfather (who lived through the Great Depression) that this education was worth the financial burden, even in these times. A video of him is available online, including his retort to cynics: "What they don't realize is that a liberal education will give them skills for life and that it w.Jl help them get a job ... if you specialize too much, the industry will dry up in twenty yea.rs, and it could, because of how fast technology is moving, and you're without work and have a general job." On reading this, I was fo:cious. Some how this Randallian Punk had time-traveled to last fall and stolen my opinions about SJ C. That was precisely how I felt moving .into Humphreys last year, giving startlingly sinilla:r sound bites any chance I could get. I found myself feverously defending my choice of secondary education to W'...ittesses and family friends, who had not actually challenged it, irnagining with pityi..ng con- tempt my high school friends unpacking with ignorant bliss at Cornell and William & Mary. Tney are the ones who truly should :have had to defend their "educations." Soon I learned a word to encompass what filled r,1-ieir education, and I cursed "rhetoric" in its every form, know.uig my superiority as an entirely rational and philosophic being, free of professors who modeled themselves on Gorgias. I cursed my brother at a farnily dinner because he dared quote a le-..--rure and not Thucydides on a matter of Spar.an custom. The fall and winter breaks found me communicating poorly with friends, but this was probably because of the poor acoustics of their personal caves. The books of freshmen year dragged me all over the interpersonal map last year, but I eventually started speaking differently about my education, especially after reading Meno again at the end of the year. I realized I just didn't know that much about it. I do not know if there is "nothing more practical than a hard core liberal a...."'i:s education," as a freshman stated to The Washington Post the day before his first serr..i.'1ar. There are many, many things I do not understand after a year of attending St. John's. This summer, I helmed a project for The Gadfly \vith the intent of involving more tutors with the paper. I sent out an email to all the tutors and waited for them to each climb aboard my creative new concept. The first response was from :Mr. Zuckerman, a retired tutor. He read my email carefully and responded with a precise correction of my grammar. He had some other issues with my email as well. He reminded me "that for many years we have been rat race by havi.-ig furn founcarefol about the meaning dations and coincidentallv of words like creativity and ma.king us virtuous too? Doe~ concept." :M.r. Zuckerman liberal education, as the freshand another tutor were very man in The Post stated in the concerned at my reference to on.line video, "feed the wallet seminar as "a course" .in mv and the soul?" email. The other tutor com"Perhaps in regards to St. mented that calling it a course John's in general, we should "makes it sound like a set follow the recommendation of readings with plans or an of one tutor responding to agenda behind them." my email concerning seminar: So that spread won't be ap- "[to gain] whatever he or she pearing any time soon. wants from the evening and How did I miss the mark follow whatever notions are so dramatically? Wny am personally interesting or valuI consistently erring in my able." I do not know. conception of where I go to I do know that there are a school and what to take from lot of theories about whv a it? Why do I let my theories liberal education is a better about what to take from read- education. I al.so know a lot ings so quickly influence my of people are having a hard life? While on two separate time balancing that benefit dates this summer, I showed with the fiscal burden. My the "slave boy" demonstra- conceptions about the nature tion to the girls. There were of this place are obviously no second dates. I feel like I flawed, and I thir...k I am not live some of the books a little al.one. In this column, I inharder t..11an other students; tend to disclose my cursory would the ghost of Stringfel- investigation into what liberal low Barr approve? Is this the education is, where it came intent of St. John's? from, and where it can take Or is it designed, as I found us. I plan on using books, it described in The Washing- W:tlripedia, conversations ton Post, as the utmost prac- with tutors, students, admintical education? Is St. John's istrators, alumni, and brutally seemingly against the grain, self-deprecating true stories, not immediately setting us in to ea...'"n.estly depict my post a career path, but in the end torpedo-fish search to k..11ow giving us the uitimate advan- whether or not we should all tage to gain materially? Is this just be business majors right school shaping us to w.in the now.~ ~~~~~~~~~~{WEEKLY}~~~~~~~~~~ Project Politae Update August 30, 2009- Project Politae and student volunteers (Chris K.rueger (SR.A), Liam Wal.lace ('12), Ian Wilson ('13), Will Loder ('13), Morgan Stephanson ('13), Jordan Dell ('13), Phillipa Gowdy-Jaeb..nig ('10), John Welsh ('10), and Suzanne Weber (staff)) met in front of Spector dorm last Sunday at 1 pm to clear out cat tails (Iypha) from the rain gardens located benveen Mellon and the new dorms (Spector and Gilliam). A brief discussion was held on the importance of rain gardens and the contribution t..liey have on the environment. For more information on rain gardens or for future Project Politae meetings and events please contact Pippa Gowdy-Jaehnig at phillipa.gowdyjaehnig@sjca.edu. ~ THE GADFLY 7 �l {FROM PAGE ONE} Davenport Voices Concern for the Community don't have a solution either. A rigorous liberal education requires that, to a degree, we temporarily remove ourselves from the world. But the St. John's motto"Making free men from children through books and a balance"-means that if we are successful here, we will be precisely the kind of citizens who have the desire and the tools to deal with these kinds of problems. And removing ourselves from the world for the sake of this education cannot completely relieve us of our responsibilities to the communities of which we are members. There are two housing projects within easy walking distance of the school-the people who live in them are very much a part of our community. With varying degrees of financial aid, we are attending one of the most expensive colleges in the wealthiest country in the world. We are receiving, in my opinion, one of the finest undergraduate educations available anywhere today. We are lucky; we are privileged. The people living in the housing projects all over Annapolis are some of the poorest, underprivileged members of our community. We were not born into our circumstances through hard work, and they were not born into theirs through dereliction. It is no surprise that the epicenter of crime in Annapolis is in the housing projects; where there is poverty, where there is a dearth of opportunity, so too will there be crime. Sometimes the most available means of relief, whether monetary or emotional, crosses the law in such circumstances. I don't say this to absolve anyone of responsibility for crimes committed, but it is a fact which anyone interested both in jusrice and in changing the situation must take into account. A t the end of my fresh.fiman year, I was trolling the streets of Annapolis look- ing for apartments to rent. I house and the price was right. was trying to find a place that The moment that has stuck would allow me and my two with me the most from my roommates, neither of whom time living there occurred had rental history or full time one night as I was walking to jobs, to sign a lease together. seminar. When two teenage Search as we might, no one girls joined me, I told them I wanted to rent to us. One was headed to school They day, after over a month of asked where. I told them St. searching, we turned down John's College. They told me Clay Street, an as yet unex- they had never heard of it beplored neighborhood. It fore. was unlike anywhere we had To my shame, I have done been. We stood out and we little to give back to the comcertainly got a lot of stares: in munity of which I am a part, the course of six blocks, we but hopefully this is a start. were the only white faces. On There are, however, some our left were neglected proj- students here who are makect buildings with haphazard ing positive change in the lawn chairs and empty cloth- community. Several students ing lines. On our right were I know have worked at the old but well-kempt houses. Head Start on Clay Street, alThe young men wore stony though I hear it has recently faces, the young women been tom down. Project laughed, the adults on their Politae was active last year porches gave us cordial hellos. offering volunteer tutoring, We had been in Annapolis a and the Epigenesis program whole year, lived three blocks started by several St. John's away, and had never even had students has offered tutoring the slightest idea of the world as well I encourage all of that existed next door. us to join their ranks and imIn all honesty and humility, prove ourselves, our friends, I felt scared, but we found a and our community. ~ {BLOWING UP DOGS: A NEW COMIC} {ANNOUNCEMENT} Take A Tutor To Lunch By Michael Dink DEAN Students: D earThe "TAKE A TIJTOR TO LUNCH" plan is By Paul Morrill '10, Staff Cartoonist in operation. It permits you a tutor (or, ··---------------------------------------------------·: to invite anyone whofor that works matter, {POLL} I I L_~sn;uctions: _To. submit an ~nswer, ~st choose one of ~e: for the college) to have lunch - ·u: choice, then 1ust tear or cut off this : with you in the dining room or cut it out of the Gadfly and put it : now and then, for free. Just . I tell the person at the door. If you're not on the meal plan imple: hopefully one that provokes you can still do it, and you that people send in answers, and also yourself get a free meal too Lrticipate in, from the freshman who (but not too often, I should es to the Greek assistant that has the say). Tutors will appreciate this ciginal Greek. occasion for conversing with ri/: Honore Hodgson, Pollster you. Most of them are very pleased to be asked. You, on ~ - or-ACHILLES? .___ __..___."---'--~A-l....1...--'L!>U---_J__-£;-l.__LLA..L..LJ DATE DUE 8 THE GADFLY the other hand, get to play host in the easiest way, and to have the company of someone you may have wanted to get to know better. The Food Service and the Dean's Office sponsor this plan. Please make use of it, but with some moderation: no more than four (4) times a month may a student be a host or a taker a guest. Campus Visitors Prospective students and tutors will soon begin to visit out campus. Please take the time to be welcoming, and to answer their questions. It may be a bit of trouble for you on a busy day, but it will be a great service to the visitors and to your college. ~ � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Senior Editor) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 2 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-09-07 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 2 of The Gadfly. Published September 7, 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.2 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/40c14cbe6df244ddc5b7254d300a4998.pdf 5e07767dd030009cd6af493fc4cba2ec PDF Text Text Wiesel's Myriad Wonders How to be Hun1ble Advantages of Hip·Hop The Value of This College THE STUDENT WEEKLY OF ST. JOIJN 1S COLLEGE • ANNAPOLIS, MARYLAND • VOLUME Y.XXI, ISSUE FOUR BY KAYLA DELOY Paalntan Settles in as ew ssistant ean F or many peo~le on this can:pus, l\nita Kronsberg s name iJeen synonymous the title i\ssistant Dean for three years of her term. that term ended vear. has been passed o~ to Susy has been a Tutor for twelve vears. Like many good things at St. Jc;hn's, her interest in the A.ssistant Dean vosi. .h . Hon startecl wit. a question. "'1,:1e [; i 1ean asked if I vmuld consider being Assistant Dean," she explains. "I just decided it would be a good thing to do .. .l thought about service to the college and doing something different." She~ >vas e~: ger to see a different side of student life than what she was to. ""mAnd so she is. Paalman volvement in the issues that are affect.- ing students" to be both the best and the worst part of being ,Assistant Dean. She finds it exciting to look for a better vvay to a studer1t or a i·x1r..- ticular the issues she fi~ces can comDlicated "Unexpected things fice~" she quips. However, there are some problems that Paalman definitely expects. "There's the perennial issue of alcohol and drugs and hrnv to handle that," she savs. "The gray area comes in, how you ~espond to infractions ... that's going to vary \Vith the severity the problem." Paalman believes that students who adhere to both the drug and alcohol CONTINUED ON PAGE EIGHT BY LAUREL FISCHER ttendance Policy obody reads the Student Handbook until thev are about to be "asked to take a year o.ff." This, I assume, is because people find most it both boring and obvious. That, however, is a strange reason a Johnnie to turn away from a work. After all, we spend a sizeable part of four vears trving to understand the laws under ·which ...,;;e live in our countrv and trying to determine the umvritte~ the moral laws under which we should live in the world. At least 95% us do this while having no idea what rules \Ve under at St~ ]ohn' s, let alone why they are in place. I am interested in understanding these rules, though, and forgive me if this cohmm goes the way of "Mere Sophistry." This vear' s Student Handbook is available. exclusivelv on the internet because it is a wast~ of money to have them printed and bound for everyone (especially for the people who don't read it). Over the summer, the Registrar's office sent ali of us paperwork to fill out and sign. At the bottom of one of these pages was a statement saying we read, understood, and agreed to abide by all of the policies in the Student Handbook. One of these policies was the then Absence Policv, vvhich stated that six. absences in a si~gle class would put you on Absence Probation, and that somewhere between six. and nine, a class could be counted as Incomplete. At the very latest, \Ve signed the waiv- Reality is esteemed {or its realistic dinosaur costumes. er saying we understood and agreed to this policy at Registration. Almost five calendar davs later, we received notification via can~pus m·ail and campus email t11at the i\bsence Policy had ch.a11gecL The new policy, and the one we currently live under (despite never haYing signed anything stating that \Ve knew of it or agreed to it) states that after six absences, we are automatically withdrawn from a class, even if we have never before received a notice. This is the legal argument. I personally agree this nevv icy. ,As a senior, I have already noticed CONTINUED ON PAGE FOUR �THE GADFLY 60 Cdlege Avenue Annapolis, }.-'\arvland 21401 United States of America Senior Edito> Design Ediwr Copy Editor Kirstie Dodd Keenan Trott-:-.r Elizabeth Spagnoletti Phorography Ediror Chloe. Ginsburg Busint.ss Manager Marin Skokandk lUu.nraror Contributorj {THE MAIL} N.Jah Llrviri Peter Axer Kayla Deu>; Laurd Fischer Katie Kolodzie Aiexa.:.1.der Leone losiah Stevens }p Snvder F ourlded in 1980, The Gadfly is the student weekly distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis caffi. pus. Opinions expressed within are the sole responsibility of the author(s). TI1e Gadfly reserves the right to accept, reject, and edit submissions in any way necessary to publish the most professional, informative, and thought-provoking newspaper whidl circumstances at St. John's permit. Letters of 200 words or less have a better chance of being published than those longer. Letters submitted will be edited for grammar, punctuation, and <>1Jelling in mo;<: cases. The Gadfly is not obligated to publish all submissions except under special circumstances. The Gadfly meets every Friday at 7 PM in the lower level of the Barr-Buchanan Center. All articles are due at 11:59 PM every Friday. For display advertisement prices and information, contact Marin Skokandic at marin.skokandic@ sjca.edu. Errors printed herein are, mostly, unintentional. Usually, typos, lni';llellings, and general fahehoods are the product of the human oversight, as opposed to malice. Readers respond to the mystery of the St. John's seal and the value of sacrifzce U pon reading Ms. Dodd's article, "Seal of Approval," in the September 7, 2009 issue of The Gadfiy, I was delighted to see student interest in the history of the St. John's College seal. Ms. Dodd and the Politv mav be interested in reading an article in the St. John's Review by Ms. Charlotte Fletcher (A.'69), our former Library Director. In her article, Ms. Fletch.er suggests that the former St. John's College seal, adopted in 1793, had Masonic roots. She states, "A count of the layers of stones in the pile numbers seven, the usual number of steps leading up to Solomon's temple and a number corresponding to the seven Masonic virtues." The man at the bottom of the pile is carrying a t:-square, a well-known svmbol of the Freemasons. · One other note: the former College seal reads "Est Nulla Via lnvia Virtuti," which Ms. Fletcher translates as "No way impassable to courage." Ms. Fletcher's article is available in the Greenfield Library's Periodicals Collection located on the second floor: Fletcher, Charlotte. "1784: The Year St. John's College was Named." St. John's Review 40.2 (1991): 43-58. Ms. Fletcher -Cara Sabol.cik, Reader Services Librarian ~···THE GADFLY, SEPTEMBER 2009 T o say no one likes sacrifice (Blechl, "Good Sacrifices," No. 3) is a terrible generalization. While it's true we are more often embarrassed at self-inflicted trials, we are usually more willing to suffer through externally imposed ones. People relish martyrdom. Mr. Blechl also wTites of the sacrifices we must make to achieve what we really want. Which is fine, but others may not consider it a sacrifice to trade in hours of Rock Band in my common room for hours of studying. Their greater end may to become a better student, and thus: not a sacrifice. And if I myself am true to my character, then there are certain things I should absolutely not be willing to sacrifice for a certain end. Since your morals and convictions are what make you more authentic, truer to what you are, they can never be compromised. It is more important to realize the things worthy of sacrifice than to worship the mere idea of it. Sacrifice is not a part of life the way death is; not inevitable but rather a choice. Mr. Blechl goes on to mention those who sacrifice for our sake. I take offense to the notion that "doing a job" can be constituted as sacrifice. Mr. Blechl calls a reference as such "slapping the hand that feeds." How- ever, being grateful toward a person or group of people for doing their work efficientlv and - competently is much more respectful than to imagine their life and work as just one huge sacrifice for your sake only. If a tutor does his job in order to make money, fine. If that same tutor does his job because he loves St. Joh~'s, teaching, learning, etc., even better. What sacrifice is he making if he is doing what he loves or he cares about us, as Mr. Blechl claims? Exactly what is he giving up when he does a job that pays his bills? He may have made very personal sacrifices, but I hardly think that has anything to do with his affectionate feelings toward any kind of larger community. Perhaps such affections are precisely what keeps him working. (Or perhaps I just read too much Ay-n Rand th.is summer.) -Elizabeth Spagnol.etti, Mr. Blechl's GiHiam neighbor THE CORRECTIONS In Issue Three, a poem and short article by Jerome Dausman was misattributed to another contributor, Jerry Januszewski. �{COMMENT} Elie Wiesel Visits St. John's N ever underestimate the unscrupulousness of the general public. And don't think that iust because they're lined up . to \Vatch a Nobel Prize laureate speak that they are above sitting in the seats marked "reserved." Of course this all comes to me as mere hearsay- I didn't get a chance to see what the inside of the auditorium looked like on last Tuesday afternoon. Even though my 2:20 language class let out ten minutes early, even though that class was in Mellon Hall, less than one hundred yards from the doors of FSK, and even though I went straight to the auditorium in my longest, most sweeping strides, I was still turned awav at the door bv our faitht~ll Officer Har~, who informed me that the auditorium was full of "students, faculty, staff, friends and neighbors." (No hard feelings, Officer Hare.) Those friends and neighbors were sitting in mv seat. Of course, the public can hardly be blamed for being the public, and we should be proud to have been able to furnish so many with the opportunity to hear a person like Mr. Wiesel speakbut maybe we need to think about a way to prioritize for students and, oh yeah, the Board of Visitors and Governors. That's right, I heard it through the grapevine that some of our own more-precious-than-ever benefactors were not able to sit in the auditorium in seats designated for them. Also amongst the shunted and shunned were several tutors, Ms. Paalman, and Ellen 0 . Moyer, the Mayor of Annapolis (okay, so Moyer was late, but still...). Yours trulv had to take a seat on tl~e conversation room floor where I tried my best to stave off my anger and pay attention to the very important man \Vavering around on the screen in front of me. Thanks camera guys'. Though my feelings on the logistics of the Wiesel lecture may not have been worthy of a Homeric epic, I \Vas not going down without a pout. Some of you may have spoken to me between 5:30 and 6:30 pm last Tuesday. I was the guy walking around with smoke pouring out of his ears, waving a petition, and perhaps prodding you with a pen. Perhaps this brings back memories for some 45 of you: \V'e the undersigned hereby make a formal request to the administration of St. John's College for the creation of an official policy that on the day or evening of any lecture or performance the doors of the Francis Scott Key Auditorium not be opened, nor any public audience in any other \vav be admitted to said· auditorium, while any tutorial or seminar be in session. 45 signatures in an hour is not too shabbv. The following morning I recovered my sense of diplomacy before taking the petition to Dean Dink. Mr. Dink responded more or less as I expected, informing me that the administration needed little remonstration from the student body in order to understand that they ought to make better plans for next time. He suggested that it may be more constTuctive to be more subtle and thoughtful in crafting ideas to ha;dle possible future situations like this a little better. I have to say I agree. Let's remember that the administration was as surprised by the turnout on Tuesday as most of the rest of us, but let's also remember that having guests as distinguished as Mr. Wiesel is something we would very much like to do again in tl~e future. Such guests are the most likely to have schedules that don't conform to our own. For future situations such as these, perhaps it would be best to put Security on the doors and close Mellon hall to the Public until ten minutes after classes let out. Perhaps we could shorten classes across the board. And speaking of the Board, maybe we could make sure that people like them (and the Mayor) get key cards to open Mellon. Maybe instituting a policy like this for all notable lectures and concerts, and making sure that these lectures and concerts are more publicized, would be a way to help our Board of Visitors and Governors get a little bigger. - Josiah Ste<1.1ens that by looking. You have to wait for him to open his mouth, and then his power is revealed. I managed to get a seat in the auditorium close to the stage. Without exaggeration, he held my attention effortlessly for the whole two hours that he spoke. This should be no surprise: he's an excellent speaker, and the stories he tells about his own life are enthralling. And yet, isn't the fact that he can communicate so well with people like us possibly the most spectacular achievement of his life? He spoke about varied subjects, ranging from the purpose of education, to the human condition, to the meaning of Abraham's sacrifice on Mount Moriah. And somehow I feel like I derived value from all of it. Despite the disparity of our lives, despite the depths of pain he has gone through, he can still reach across all the divides and help me to better understand things within my own life. This ability to communicate t about one o'clock on meaningfully and seemingly Tuesday, I \Vas study- effortlesslv with other huing out on the quad, when I mans stoC::d out most strongly looked up and saw an older in Q&A period. I'm not sure man ambling across the if he expected this to happen, grass. He was smiling under but several people asked him his fly-away hair, shaking intensely personal questions hands and exchanging a few on subjects such as his faith words with Johnnies \Vho and Holocaust deniers. He crossed his path. It took a took them all in good stride, moment for me to recognize answering a few with brief who I was seeing: Elie Wi- jokes and giving longer explaesel. There's no special glow nations to others. The miracle of human around people like him, no flashing neon declaring this communication is that it man's accomplishments. Mr. spans such gaps so effortlessWiesel has experienced both ly. Perhaps the most enduring the nadir of our cruel indif- thing I took from. his lecture ference and the peak of our was the belief that nothing understanding; ·he has sur- can force us to stop talking to vived things I cannot truly each other and deriving value imagine, written bestselling from that communication. - Katie Kol.odzie books, and won a Noble Peace Prize. But you can't tell A THE GADFLY, SEPTEMBER 2009 ~ '~ ~ �{DICTIONARY DlVlNC} How to be Humble JP considers becoming a lexicographer, but decides he's just too good at sports ,lP SYNDER S o son1eone came to me with this idea to write an article on how to humble, I had to go up the \Vorel, as l had never heard it before. Once I fornred out 1-vhat the word me~nt, I realized that this nerson was being sarcastic I ~1ecided to writ~ this article anvvvav B.D'\1one else ha~n't' vet he:m1 this and to l~elp you of your former misgivings. First off~ why viould anyone want to be humble? Have vou even looked it up like 1 have? Three of its definitions are mortifying: "having a feeling of insignificance,'' "low in rank or status," and, the 1-vorst, "lmv in height." Yeah, yeah, it can'- also mean courteously respectful, but in mv humble oDinion (1 can sav tl{at tl{is word is vastly overrated. I can hear some of vou now, those who remem'ber 1.vhat Socrates said, "But what if I want to appear to be humble? How can 1 reap the benefits such a \vord without subiecting myself to such stimiditV?" The truth is you cam~ot. This is one of those hidden caveats of the word where there is nothing vou can do vomself without ~ctuaHv actu~lizing the word. Sure, ~ou can thr;aten someone v,:ith a beating, forcing him to compliment you i.n front that one cute on how great your exploits are in intramurals or Seminar so you can coolly shrug it off. But your secret is out and that kid, probably someone like Thomas Mvers, knows the truth theret~n' negating vour goal. . He~e is the secret. To those of vou who aren't sublime at sp~rts, an intellectual badass in Seminar, or really have nothing going for them, you don't need to kno\v this can to some article. For evervone else, being humble is ve~y difficult. A~ La said "Plenof people wish to be pious, no one yearns to be humble." And, "It is a great abilitv to be able to con~eal one's allility." It is against man's nature to >vant to be humble. It offends him. If have practiced your in a particular sport, shouldn't you be recognized? If you reread vour Seminar reading th.re~ times and killed it in.,class, you praise of a tutor 1Nho has seen how hard vou worked? The ans;,ver is y:es. The problem is that, in societv, it is seen as negative to be ~ware and proul of how well you did. \Ve strive here at St. John's to lead examined lives and yet \Ve are not supposed to know >vhen we do something l'ma call BuHShit on that one. lt's gotten to the point \Vhere one does not even need to speak to called arrogant. If you are already good at sornething and practice because you want to get even better, be prepared for someone to are showing THE GADFLYi SEPTEMBER 2009 cause those people recognize their own deficiencv in their soul. Thev know. vou are but, instead of praise, will admonish vou for being better than th~m. To them there is no difference between stating facts that vou are better and lording it ~)Ver them. I know that I ;m good at snorts. I have worked~ very ha;d to way, I refuse to arrogant for aware this fact. It i;ains me to see 1 peopl.e who nave too humilitv. You are amazing at what.you do, yet you hold yourself back in fear what Clthers might sav. For those whc;· have . not gotten e11ougl1 Tecogr1itio11, tl1is is your praise. Be proud Johnnies of who you are, how hard you work, and how smart you really are. Don't be arrogant and don't be humble. Be aware. Recognize the beauty in your soul and refuse to let it be held in check. I'll start. No one came up to me 1.-vith av1esome idea to vvrite on humility. 1 thought it up mvselfbecause I am amazing. Also, HUHS-el-errs!!!~ ., ~ ~ FROM PAGE ONE: FISCHER shoddv attendance in mv classm'ates, and it does affect the class. Also, it is deplorth_at \Ve~ as adultsl \Vere not responsible for keeping track of our own absences~ I can in1agi11e it becomes more difficult 'Nhen you miss more than six per d~;s per seme~ter.) There are, ot course, aiwavs eood rea~ons for missing dass,- and as the Handbook states, if you talk to your tutor or the Ass~stant Dean about why . . ' you re m1ss1ng Gass, vou rrwv have more \viggle roo'm. , A real p~;blem comes from. tutors though. In previous years, t1_itors sometimes didn't turn in their absences on time (or at all) and then students slid by on this fact combined with the lack notice given for probation. l\.11 that aside, if vou're missing class, you'~e ~issing class, and it ultimately has been up to your tutor in combination with the i\.ssistant Dean to remove vou from the class. I wouldn't hold my breath the aforementioned legal argument will get you out -1 . ( trouDie, _so ,my auv1ce ,especially to iTeshrnen) is to go to class, and if you can't, d; the obvious thing and maintain a dialogue with your tutor about it. '!V' i ]';fr, "lvi: So yeah, •.vhiie everyone ivas hn"ving their orgasms of undentanding today in u:as strugghng in tlu confused as ever. Mr. B: It's all corner~ rnan, it an)'Way. stiH were "'j �l {OliT AND ABOUT} The Advantages Why you should listen to hip-hop PETER AXER {01'1G} Reality Goes JURASSIC!! seriously I got into hip-hophaving bethree years ago, producers vvhat to do as they stand in the recording booth. come bored with rock and Consider Q-Tip of A Tribe roll. As I started listening to Called Quest, "Turn everyrappers rap about their rela- thing up in the headphones." tionships to hip hop culture, (This, of course, can also be music, their fans, and the understood as a command record industry, I thought to the listener). Rappers go about the meaning and the so far as to describe the efemotion behind rap music. fects of their music on the The entire perspective from listener, and perhaps no which a rapper approaches one does this more elohis verse, or his musical piece, quently or profoundly than is entirely different from rock Rakim in FoUow the Leader. and roll or any sung music. The reason rappers, proThe first major difference ducers, and DJs make their between rap and the major- control of the music so obviity of sung music is that rap ous is because hip-hop is an is an intentionally self-con- expression of a person's will, scious art. Hip Hop albums his/her mastery of music, often make it obvious that a language, rhythm, ideas, and recording is being made, and feelings. While sung music that the producer or DJ and has a tradition of expressthe rapper are in control of ing feelings through emothis process. Perhaps the first tional singing, the cadence time this happened in popu- of hip-hop is often confronlar music was on The Beatles' tational, even when a rapper Revovver, where "Taxman" is expressing vulnerability or begins with the sound of the thoughtfulness. There are studio and somebodv count- many reasons for this, but ing off the song's me,ter. It is the main one I think is that a part of the essence of hip hip-hop culture is socially hop music, unlike rock and radical: it asserts the will of roll, that at the very forefront the rapper, or beat-maker or of the musical experience, DJ, to fashion an honorable, the listener is aware that the honest, and triumphant life rap artists are molding his for himself independent of experience of their music. traditional social norms and For this reason, albums, and institutions, which are often mixtapes especially, have the mism1sted and criticized. DJ cutting a track which inOf course, sung popular cludes the vocals that the music also has examples of rapper has already recorded, maintaining this attitude, repeating the first 2-8 bars of like in the self-assertive music rhyming one or more times of The Clash, Bob Dylan, and before the DT lets the record of course James Brown, if you spin through its entirety. can call his music sung. (Punk Rappers can often be rockers listen up: 1 don't heard on records telling their equate the independent atti- tude of rap to punk because much punk is too ironic and cynical to be comparable to the triumphant expression of will inherent in hip hop). A.s a musical art which incorporates words, hip hop expresses emotion and opinions straight from the rapper' s mind, as he would spit them to an enemv or competitor. These en~mies can be rival rappers, racist people with power, Death, or Time with its equalizing effect on all human stories of the past. Listen to Pharoahe Monch' s "Queens "andOC' s "T·ime ' s . . Up." It is artists like these who assert against Time's ubiquitous destructiveness that some stories are worthy of being told to the future. The fact that rappers place themselves at the forefront of rap makes hip-hop music more self-indulgent but also more immediately personal (though no less artful) than much rock and sung music. It gets deeper, though: the most profound rappers use their blatant mastery of the art to invite vou into their thoughts and ~isions for the sake of an intimate, meaningful experience with the listener, intended to inspire you to live your life with greater independence and passion. Rakim' s words quoted above are such an invitation.~ JOHNNIE QUOTES Ms. C: You know, I don't know if God talked to Aln-aham, but I am damn wen sure he talked to Ptolemy. THE GADFLY, SEPTEMBER 2009··~~ �{DODD ON THE QUAD} Sorry, Winkie The good of outside sources KIRSTIE DODD I f to err is to be then my humanity pops out in sundrv olaces: covert ice cream binge~, a love of all VH 1 Celebre~lity shows, an.. '{ious biting, the occasional rejection of flossing, unintentional misuse of the words and "less." These are the little transgressions I deal Dodd-on-Dodd, so 1'11 iust mention them and leave lt at that. (Plm an my commentary on "Daisy of Love" would be kind of disgusting in The Gadfly, l think.) 1 will air out my greatest transgression against this fine institution-a faux pas so it sounds like '~fokes pass." Some~.;v·here Stringfellow "Winkie'' Barr is churning in his grave, but I must confess: I make frec1uent exee:etical foravs into back c~.;_,er/introd{ICtion/ frcnt script/foot-note territory on almost every Great Book. Yeah, 1 said it. I like to read outside sources. I that like Voldemort and Prostate Cancer and Racism, the "outside source" is something we don't like to acknowledg~ here at school. \X'hen I'm guiltily scanning the Wikipedia page about a Prne:ram author before seminar,'· I remember some of Pa1~1' s more tortured Dassages in Romans about th~ nar{;re of sin: "I do not understand what I do. For what l want to do I not do, but \Vhat 1 hate I do [Romans 7:15]." Lately, though, I've been vvondering about mv outside source guilt. How much outside source material is too much when reading a Program author? Am 1 going to Program purgatory, or am I for freezing rair1) snmv and rivers boiling can agree that an outside source will distort the 1;vay cne read:: a text, but son1e outside sources are-in a Catholic church kind of vvay-"more sinful" than others. Spark.Notes, CliftNotes, and anv other internet interpretafo~n/summary is bound to put you in the fifth or sixth circle of Inferno, just a circles away from beer-ponging state school CUCH>lHl1'' ' arid l"'IO<lJl'-lT·l~IS Judging the severity own offense, I'm probin Program Limbo. My iournev to the land of sec~1ndary sources is meant basic information about an author, and sometimes I go for sheer amusemer1t. It helps me to know the text's dates of composition and at a ii-1fOrn1ation about the author to place the book somewhere on the long shelf of history. No one can fault me for that, right? Perhaps the danger comes from going beyond this bare minimum, because I have a tendency to look up a Program author like an eHarmony profile. I want to Like GADFLY, SEPTEMBER 2009 HUC"~"· to knmv \vhat he looks like. to hear his voice in mv h~ad when I'm reading hi~ words, to discover his habits and personality traits. course, I have to restrain myself from blurting things out in seminar like "Pericles was a hottie!" and "Did vou know Lobachevskv is called the Copernicus · Cieometry?l?!" because a) they make me sound like a freaky preteen girl and b) they do nothing to help the conversation and c) comments like that are a surefire way to get fifteen angry glares boring through vour embarrassed skull. . But because I've to have a teatime relationship \vith each Program aud1or, over the course of three vears I've stockpiled a each~ Great Personalities that may one dav contribute to onset schizophrenia. I've taken Kam' s broad forehead, pallid, powder-damped cheeks, ~111d nose~ <111d I imagined him 1.vriting Critique of Pure Reason in a feverish German. George Eliot, with her long and v;eepy eves. has taken on c~l ~ignificance after readine: that Henry James regarded her as "magnificently ugly ... deliciouslv hideous." So as a ~inner needs a compatriot, I now share my vice with you. I have compiled a little list my favorite tidbits Program you might not ··have known, taken from mv own research. These facts a~e as reliable as I can get them (which means they a~e a little more reliable than things in National EnquiTei· and a little less reliable than things in GeograJJhic): 1. Wittgenstein could the clarinet and had lute pitch perfection, and his older brother was a concert pianist, even after arm was amputated in \vWL 2. Nietzsche had girly handw1iting. 3. Bertrand Russell couldn't keep a vvifey 11e ;vas n1:1rried four tirnes. Also, \vhen talks Aristotle's Ethics. he savs it . . is " to a man any dept'1 l feeling cannot be but repulsi\~. and calls his logic "as definitelv anticmated ~as Ptolemaic astronom;." There goes freshman and sopho-more vear. 4. St. Augustine is Augustine of Hippo ... as in iwwrn"''." Africa. My book COVConfessions depicted as a pasty guy locked up in some medieval abbey. Hmm. 5. Anselm's sexualitv is a fiercely debated , in some academic circles. 6. Hume's favorite piece of silverware was a fork. This is because he '>Vas Scottish. 7. There ;.vasn't much dirt I ~ DU11 U1) .H ' - God. . it seems . . e s pretty good at clutching His cards close to His chest. 8. Bach chuckled to himwhen he composed "Air on a G String" because it was a subtle ode to his favorite type of underwear. 9. Immanuel Kant was baptized "Emanuel Kant," that spelling wasn't good enough tCJr him. He changed his o~vn name to "Imma11uel" 1ear11ing Hebrevv meaning was "(~od with us." 1 missed that whole Kant-asMessianic-figure part of junior year because I was too busy cursing him as Satan. 10. Kepler's mom was tried· as a ·witch, his first wife died of Hungarian spotted fover, and after her death considered eleven different matches. 11. Newton •Nas a JJremature When he di~d, the autopsy revealed extremely high levels mercury in his b~dy from his alchemy obsession. I could go on and on, but you get the idea. So much for atonement. §r' I I �T H E GADFLY REVIEW {THIS COLLEGE} For What It's Worth The value of a liberal education MICHAEL LACY was M yfulldorm last yearhome. of crap from entries or therapy sessions wish to repent for being from could cure. I think this is why Sodom-like New England, and understand where this These objects were mostly I came to St. John's College. I've been wondering if this curly-haired heathen sailor is traps for dust that worsened my psychosomatic sleep ap- was a good reason to come coming from. nea and cluttered my mental here. If we wish to know ourJessica Steer, a freshman, workspace. The most interest- selves, the reason we came told me she wanted an ining relic was a writing note- here seems to be something sight into "how people interbook from my junior English we must understand. It is the act, the benefits of philosoclass. My writing there is efficient cause, the agent that phy, and abstract concepts." probably the (unintention- brought us to liberal educa- She described her home in ally) funniest it will ever be. tion, and St. John's in partic- Virginia Beach as: "a shaJ... It is snarky, irreverent, offen- ular. If we find out what a lib- lov/ place ... there's definitely sive, and hypocritical. I assail eral education is for and what not enough appreciation of my school system for trying to it can do (if indeed it does do the arts." In clarification, she expel me for smoking weed something and is not truly meant the liberal arts, but on a field trip the year before: useless), then we should see also she felt the visual arts "Those Puritans!" Don't get if we can align these causes, would have a better appreme started on standardized or if we came here for the ciation in this Polity than in tests. \vrong reasons'. So I talked other places. This reminded But starting in entry to some people. me of what Mr. Zuckerman, twelve, I get more resigned. Senior Pavlos Papadopou- a former St. Toh.n's Tutor told The assignment was, "De- los told me he did not come me Wednesday afternoon. scribe your high school to here to read Great Books. In his COzY home just a a new student." Instead of In a discussion in the coffee block from campus, I disanswering the question I shop Friday morning, he re- cussed with him his experiasked, "How can I address vealed he was more interested ence with liberal education the situation, the morals (or "in the form than content" of and St. John's. Bookshelves lack thereof!) of my school in St. John's, and in a way still line every wall, one with a an emotionally draining and is. Avoiding the SATs was a Nietzsche collection bigger sincere-less manner, focusing major factor in his looking than most bookstore's selfon the humorously negative into the college, but he was help section. Well-used sheet parts of the schools." This more repelled by all other music is organized in cubbies theme, this frustration with standardized-testing-based beside his upright piano, and my lack of conviction about schools, than attracted to stacks of his original paintanything, but my willingness SJC. He also spoke of a desire ings lie unceremoniously on to crap on anything, reoccurs to "free his mind of prejudic- the floor, awaiting his upthroughout the later entries. es" he developed throughout coming gallery show. ZuckerI lament my constant analysis his life, such as his New Eng- man does not appear to be and critique of everything, land aversion to organized a man limited to the art of including myself, a habit religion. As a Virginian, I thinking. that no number of journal can see why someone would He was brought up to be a concert pianist, as his family deeply valued the performing arts. In his declarative act of rebellion, he attended the High School of Music and Arts in New York City as an art, not music, student. He wrote a book on Wagner's Tristan and Isolde and taught political history at Columbia (after never taking a course in the subject) before studying literature at Cambridge. He then found out about St. John's quite by chance. While visiting a painter friend, he met Douglas .Alenbrook, who Zuckerman claims: "besides Zuckerkandl, was the most important person with St. John's Music Program." The rest is history. Are there 'wrong reasons' to come here? Maybe \vrong' in the sense one might not get certain desires fulfilled, like if one were to come here to quit smoking. James Flaim, a sophomore, claims to have come for the high.speed-internet. But if there is something to gain from this education, or something beneficial is done to us by being here, how wonderful, how much more potent these books and ideas would seem if we could partake in their power without even asking for them by name . ...- THE GADFLY, SEPTEMBER 2009 �\j {BLOWING UP DOGS} FROM PAGE ONE: DELOY 'I:1":I..bl~ A E?rl11.t.. 1"1<J'i£~i>, ~11£. ...,~ ~'f ~ 'ICOV Moa. WlTI-1. tlct '<¢1.tR '?~ 'F~T1Mt:. T1'°""1t. »a"'? policy and to what they have \!M.llfi> '(ou ( decided is best for them will 1):'iWt't'\.! l'l"t do well with this issue. She is prepared, however, to face the problems that arise when students break their word to be responsible members of the Polity and when the physical aspects of drinking -PauL "I'm LegaL" MarriLL and drug use have become which m1ssmg class is the dangerous. {PUZZLE} on each man's head. The two Whether about alcohol or best option. hard to craft hats left over are hidden. The anything else, when disciplin- an attendance policy for that blindfolds are then removed. ary problems are brought to reason," she reflects. annibals ambush a sa- It is said to the men that if Paalman' s work on the ather office, Paalman has one fari in the jungle and one of them can guess what piece of ~dvice for those in- tendance policy is very much volved: "Honesty goes a long in keeping with her philoso- capture three men. The can- color hat he is wearing they way. It's impractical in a place phy about the Assistant Dean nibals give the men a single can all leave unharmed. The man in the rear who this size to think you will get position. "I see this role as chance to escape unharmed. away with a lie." That being being... a helpful role for the The captives are lined up in can see both of his friends' said, Paalman wants to be snidents and community," order of height and are tied hats but not his own says, clear that she is not out to get she states. She is eager to to stakes. The man in the "I don't know." The middle anyone, although discipline listen to anyone with a prob- rear can see the backs of his man who can see the hat of is a necessary part of her job. lem, but also to anvone with two friends, the man in the the man in front, but not his She is a strong believer in an idea. It is clear V.:here Paal- middle can see the back the mvn says, "I don't know." dealing with each situation man' s focus lies when she man in front, and the man in The front man who cannot see anybody's hat says, "I indivicluallv. "One of the vir- declares, "what the .A• .ssistant front cannot see anyone. The cannibals show the know!" How did he know tues of bei~g a small college Dean's ~ffice does is help stuis that you can take things on dents run themselves." She men five hats. Three of the the color of his hat and what a case by case basis. I would is not alone in her efforts; hats are black and two of the color was it?" The solution to the previfeel like I were doing a disser- "one of the best parts of this hats are white. Blindfolds vice to the students of the col- is meeting all of the people are then placed over each ous puzzle is 64. -Elizabeth Fleming lege if I were too formulaic." in the offices and seeing how man's eyes and a hat is placed All of this sounds familiar dedicated they are," she says. {ATHLETES OF THE WEEK} from the days of Kronsberg, Paalman herself has received but Paalman has already some assistance too: "A lot of made one major change: de- people have been helpful," fined consequences for miss- including Kronsberg. "She's ing more than five classes in a a really good resource." nitorial and more than three This is particularly true classes in a seminar, mak- . about one very important asing the Absence Policy more pect of being Assistant Dean: structured than in the past. taking care of Cady. Krons"My hope was to help out berg has given Paalman sage the students and tutors by advice about handling the making something that was campus dog, and Cady has a little more clear," Paalman lost no time in trying to play says. She felt that students one Assistant Dean off of the did not have enough infor- other. "Cady made the admation about the policy, and justment very well," Paalman the .Assistant Dean needed to says with a smile. give the tutors more support The same can be said of on the issue. The new policy Paalman, and although she requires more judgment does not yet know what she on the part of the students wants her legacy to be, perabout how to use absences, haps she too will make it into but Paalman acknowledge~ a Senior Prank skit in her last that there are situations in year as Assistant Dean. '!1V' ( l "Its Men in Hats C ~-"THE GADFLY, SEPTEMBER 2009 I � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource <em>The Gadfly</em> Description An account of the resource Founded in 1980, <em>The </em><em>Gadfly</em> is a weekly student publication distributed to over 600 students, faculty, and staff of the Annapolis campus.<br /><br />Click on <strong><a title="The Gadfly" href="https://digitalarchives.sjc.edu/items/browse?collection=16&amp;sort_field=Dublin+Core%2CDate&amp;sort_dir=d">Items in the <em>The Gadfly</em> Collection</a></strong> to view and sort all items in the collection. Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context thegadfly Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 8 pages Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dodd, Kirstie (Senior Editor) Title A name given to the resource The Gadfly, Vol. XXXI, Issue 4 Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2009-09 Description An account of the resource Volume XXXI, Issue 4 of The Gadfly. Published September 2009. Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Gadfly 31.4 Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Language A language of the resource English Type The nature or genre of the resource text Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Gadfly Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/647e3416aced3cec00e4d3c2be0a095c.mp3 eb093b30b4d6c004228cf838fcfbb8df Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource St. John's College Lecture Recordings—Santa Fe Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Meem Library Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Santa Fe, NM Sound A resource primarily intended to be heard. Examples include a music playback file format, an audio compact disc, and recorded speech or sounds. Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data wav Duration Length of time involved (seconds, minutes, hours, days, class periods, etc.) 00:55:19 Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Descartes on imagination and truth Description An account of the resource Audio recording of a lecture given on February 16, 2018 by Mary Domski as part of the Dean's Lecture and Concert Series. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Domski, Mary, 1975- Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Santa Fe, NM Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2018-02-16 Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource Meem Library has been given permission to make this item available online. Type The nature or genre of the resource sound Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource mp3 Subject The topic of the resource Descartes, René, 1596-1650. Meditationes de prima philosophia Descartes, René, 1596-1650. Principia philosophiae Language A language of the resource English Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context 20014430 Friday night lecture https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/71482100972c64d3d0562f6175633c20.mp3 20c9e4a534125376b9bdf90b5fb28118 Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource St. John's College Lecture Recordings—Santa Fe Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Meem Library Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Santa Fe, NM Sound A resource primarily intended to be heard. Examples include a music playback file format, an audio compact disc, and recorded speech or sounds. Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data wav Duration Length of time involved (seconds, minutes, hours, days, class periods, etc.) 00:53:37 Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource A page of Kepler Description An account of the resource Audio recording of a lecture given on February 17, 2017 by Bill Donahue as part of the Dean's Lecture and Concert Series. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Donahue, William H. Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Santa Fe, NM Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2017-02-17 Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource Meem Library has been given permission to make this item available online. Type The nature or genre of the resource sound Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource mp3 Subject The topic of the resource Kepler, Johannes, 1571-1630. Astronomia nova. English Language A language of the resource English Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context 20014364 Friday night lecture https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/687a2f5ea81153a3c2ddfaf656313fca.pdf 475f45ae3bea6ffa4783000b6cc26a39 PDF Text Text William Donahue, November 5, 2021 What would Kepler say to Einstein? The more I think of this topic, the more appalled I am at my hubris in proposing it. “Really, Mr. Donahue (you might be thinking), “aren’t you just using Kepler’s name to throw out your own rash thoughts into an arena in which you have no business contending?” As for the arena, I have no defense, other than that here at St. John’s we routinely contend in contests where, by standards accepted elsewhere, we have no formal qualifications. We do it anyway, unapologetically. We do not expect to establish new truths, nor to overthrow established theories. But we do hope that in this rather mad undertaking we may gain for ourselves a little more understanding, both of the amazing universe we live in and the powerful thinkers and their remarkable insights into that universe. In presuming to offer advice to Einstein (ostensibly in the persona of Kepler), I am on much shakier ground. The theme of this lecture sprang from a lecture I gave some years ago at Johns Hopkins, which had to do with Kepler’s introduction of physical principles into astronomy. In the question period, I was asked what could be learned (if anything) from Kepler’s views on what constitutes a good hypothesis. I replied that, more than merely accounting for phenomena, it would have to be based in physical reality. This occasioned much rolling of eyes, presumably at my extreme naïveté, which led me to ponder, in the ensuing years, what Kepler might have understood by “physical reality,” and whether a similar mode of understanding might be applicable to more recent physical theory. At length I thought about Einstein’s replacement of Maxwell’s “luminiferous ether” with a postulate asserting the constancy of the speed of light in all possible inertial frames of reference. This seemed to me a theoretical move about which Kepler would have been extremely skeptical. The idea of the ether, after all, was �introduced into electromagnetic theory in order to provide a medium for electromagnetic waves, whose existence could be demonstrated. These waves were conceived as being similar to sound waves in air and other fluid media, and the idea of a wave in nothing, without any medium or substrate, was (I believe) calculated to raise objections from the community of physicists. And with them, I believe, would be Kepler, were he still around to express his views. Now of course Kepler did not say anything about waves, so I must say first of all what criteria he used in evaluating a scientific hypothesis, and why I think he would have raised an objection to Einstein’s rejection of the ether. One of the best examples of Kepler’s thinking about the physical reality behind the apparent motion of the planets is found right near the beginning of Astronomia Nova, in Chapter 2. This chapter is a deliberate reprise of Book I Chapter 3 of Ptolemy’s Almagest, but Kepler takes the argument a giant step farther, asking how each of the two kinds of hypotheses (epicyclic and eccentric) could be understood to function in physical reality. And for Kepler, the limits of physical reality are very broad, but are also clear and definite. So here is where we have to begin. Kepler takes it as demonstrated that there are no real, rigid epicycles and deferent circles or spheres in the heavens. The question, then, is how the moving power (supposed for the moment to reside in the planet) could make the planet move in a circle. Like Ptolemy, Kepler considered both the eccentric hypothesis and the concentric-with-epicycle hypothesis; in the interest of time, we will consider only the former. This power, whatever it is, would have two jobs: it would have to be strong enough to move the body of the planet, and it would have to know where to move 2 �it. This would require knowledge or perception of the circular path in the unmarked aethereal air—a function of intelligence and not physics. Now a circle, Kepler says, even for God, is nothing but equality of distance from some point. Citing Avicenna, he says that the planet will either have to “imagine for itself the center of its orb and its distance from it,” or use some other property of a circle to establish its distance and direction. Here’s the example Kepler gives. The planet’s assignment will be to move on the path γεδ, with center β (not occupied by any body or perceptible mark). This center is fixed in position with respect to point α, which is occupied by a body. To make this motion possible, the planetary mover might be endowed with some means of perceiving the angular size of the body α, as it should appear, in succession, at γ, ε, η, δ, continually adjusting its distance from α while moving with uniform speed on the resulting circle. Somehow, it will have to match continually the distances γα, εα, ηα, δα, and so on (calculated by observing the apparent size of the body at α), with the angles γαε, γαη, γαδ, respectively. It will also have to know the direction of the line of apsides, αγ, in the sphere of the stars. As Kepler says, “The planet’s mover will thus be occupied with many things at once,” his implication being that this arrangement makes no sense. “To escape this conclusion,” he continues, “one must assert that the planet pays attention to the point β, entirely empty of any body or real quality, and maintains equal distances from that point.” “Body or real quality”: that is the kind of thing that Kepler was looking for. It would have to be perceptible, somehow, even if it were not the same as objects that we interact with every day. Objects of pure mathematics, such as points and 3 �lines, would not do. Beyond that, Kepler was extraordinarily open to analogies, both mechanical and living. Earlier in the chapter, he considers at length the operations of muscles in the human body, and concludes that animal locomotion would not be a good model for planetary motion; nonetheless, he is very much open to a role for minds in the heavens. In passing, it is fascinating to note that Newton, too, found that the supposedly “natural” circular motion could not be produced by central forces alone. The moving body would have to take into account, in addition to its velocity and its distance from the center of force, the chord from its present position through the center to the opposite side of the circle. Thus it would have to know where it would be on the other side of its orbit! We are now prepared to imagine what Kepler might think while reading Einstein’s world-changing paper “On the Electrodynamics of Moving Bodies.” He would certainly want to know what this “electrodynamics” is. Maybe the best explanation would be to display the two experimental demonstrations that Einstein describes, which (I hope) are now familiar to all seniors. [show two videos, one with a hand moving a magnet through a coil of wire, the other with a hand moving the coil with the magnet fixed.] Kepler might be surprised to see the magnetic needle wiggle, whether the magnet moves inside the coil of wire or the coil moves along the magnet. He might be more surprised to learn that, despite the identical effects of the motion upon the magnetic needle, the theory requires that there be two very different accounts of what is happening. Here is Einstein’s description: 4 �“If the magnet is in motion and the conductor at rest, there arises in the neighborhood of the magnet an electric field with a certain definite energy, producing a current at the places where parts of the conductor are are situated. But if the magnet is stationary and the conductor in motion, no electric field arises in the neighborhood of the magnet. In the conductor, however, we find an electromotive force, to which in itself there is no corresponding energy, but which gives rise—assuming equality of relative motion in the two cases discussed—to electric currents of the same path and intensity as those produced by the electric forces in the former case.” [emphasis supplied] (This is clearly shown by the deflection of the needle in the two cases.) Kepler would, I think, be reminded of the physical difference between planetary motion as conceived by the geocentrists and the motion as seen by the heliocentrists. The phenomena as observed by the astronomers would be the same in both cases, but the physical reality would be radically different. I imagine he would say, “Well, two contradictory accounts cannot both be true, so one of the descriptions must be the correct one.” Einstein, however, went off in a completely different direction. Ignoring conventional ideas of space and time in Newtonian physics, he adopted two principles, which he initially raised as conjectures, but immediately (in his own words) “raised to the status of postulates.” 1. The same laws of electrodynamics and optics will be valid for all frames of reference for which the equations of mechanics hold good. 2. Light is always propagated in empty space with a definite velocity c which is independent of the state of motion of the emitting body. A “postulate,” we should recall, is how we usually translate the Greek Ἀιτήμα, meaning “demand, request.” It is a statement that the author requests us to accept 5 �as true, without proof, as a basis for the demonstrations that will follow. Einstein states that he will use these postulates to attain “a simple and consistent theory of the electrodynamics of moving bodies based on Maxwell’s theory for stationary bodies.” In other words, he proposes to fix the inconsistency between the theoretical accounts of electromagnetic induction, noted above, not by adopting one or the other account as “true,” but by a radical reformation of the foundations of all of physics, by adding these two postulates to Newton’s three “Axioms, or Laws of Motion.” Now I do not think that Kepler would be troubled, in principle, with the idea of a radical reform of physics. But I do think he would be troubled by Einstein’s next sentence. Einstein wrote, “The introduction of a ‘luminiferous ether’ will prove to be superfluous inasmuch as the view here to be developed will not require an ‘absolutely stationary space’ provided with special properties.” Since Kepler believed that God had created a finite, spherical universe with the sun at its center, he clearly was an advocate of a stationary space with special properties, such as privileged places. But aside from this, I will argue that, theology aside, Kepler would have philosophical or methodological objections to abandoning the Maxwellian ether. To do this, I will have to make an excursion into the considerations that led Maxwell and other physicists of the nineteenth century to espouse the ancient idea of an ethereal medium filling all space. The excursion I propose will lead us into some rather elementary physical considerations. These may be the sort of thing that Einstein would think of as “superfluous,” but this is exactly the kind of inquiry that Kepler enjoyed. So let us invite him to join us in considering the “simple” pendulum. [video of pendulum] [video of two loosely linked pendulums] 6 �[video of a number of loosely linked pendulums] [video of Bell wave machine, first with all but one bar clamped, then with the clamp removed so as to create a wave] Kepler was very good at constructing mathematical models of physical actions, but (as we saw in Astronomia Nova) he wanted more from a sound physical explanation. In several places in Astronomia Nova he set out a three-leveled structure: the observational evidence, geometrical modeling of the observations, and a physical account that could underlie the geometry. As for what could serve as a “physical account,” Kepler was open to a very wide range of examples: animal joints and muscles, magnetism, whirlpools and other examples of water flow (such as Heron’s fountain), amusement park rides, oars and paddles, and so on. He seems to have sought examples that would be generally acknowledged as physically real and that could be understood as constituting an analogue to a phenomenon that is felt to be in need of explanation. In proposing such examples, he was often not claiming that the analogy provided a full and adequate account of the phenomenon, only that the physical reality might be somewhat like the example. Sometimes he combined two different analogies in a single diagram, as here (from Astronomia Nova Chapter 59), where a magnetic planet (the big black circle) with a vertical axis (note the arrowhead at the top) is alternately attracted and repelled by the sun, but is also being propelled by a boatman with a pole (or perhaps an oar). He also candidly admits the provisional or conjectural nature of some of his analogies: for example, in Ch. 57 he writes, “I am satisfied if this magnetic example demonstrates the general possibility of the proposed mechanism. 7 �Concerning the details, however, I have doubts...There may be absolutely no material, magnetic faculty that can accomplish the tasks entrusted to the planets individually…” His point is, that wherever possible, it is preferable to invoke a physical force or power such as magnetism or weight, but if all else fails, it is permissible to invoke mental or animate powers. So let’s think about what Kepler might hope for as a generalized physical metaphor or underpinning for wave phenomena. To help us, I’d like to bring back the Bell wave machine. [Bell video] We may think of the machine as an assembly of linked pendulums. Each crossbar is attached to a longitudinal torsion bar that runs the length of the machine. If the crossbar at the end is displaced and released while the bar next to it is clamped in place, it oscillates while all the other crossbars remain at rest. [video with just one bar moving] It is acting as a torsional pendulum. When its displacement is at its maximum, the twisting force is also maximum, and the bar, when released, moves in the direction of the force, towards its rest position. But when it gets to its rest position, it has acquired some speed, which carries it past the rest position to a new maximum displacement. If we remove the clamp from the next crossbar, the motion of the first bar twists the torsion bar, which then imparts that twist to the next crossbar, which in turn adds a twist to the torsion bar, and thus the twisting motion is passed on. It’s much like those pendulums we saw earlier, that were connected by springs. So it appears that in order to have a wave in some medium, two things are needed. 8 �1. Individual places in the medium have to be able to move like pendulums: when given an initial push, they will depart from their position, but they then experience a restorative force in the medium that pushes back towards whence they came; 2. The pendulums have to be linked so that the swinging of each of them is communicated to neighboring pendulums. When they are tightly linked, the wave move quickly through them; when loosely linked (as the pendulums were), the motion is communicated more slowly. This can be applied to electromagnetic waves in a general way quite directly. Consider this simple assembly of two collinear pieces of metal (called a “dipole”), colored red, connected to the output of a device (the transmitter) that makes electricity slosh back and forth between the two sides of the dipole. The transmitter/dipole assembly is our initiating pendulum: the natural tendency of the electricity is to create an equality of tension or “potential” between the two sides of the dipole; the transmitter provides the pushes that keep the electricity oscillating. What happens, as we know from Faraday, is that the electric and magnetic forces generated by this assembly ripple out through the surrounding space. Electric tension builds up in space, and as the tension is released by the restoring force of the medium, this release constitutes an electric current, which generates a magnetic force, which grows and decreases in a similar way, generating an electric displacement current, and so on. This action continues, and constitutes what we call a “radio wave.” And there is strong evidence that light, too, is just such a wave. 9 �So the wave metaphor, built up out of linked motions that act like pendulums, evidently applies to electricity, magnetism, and light too, in a direct and comprehensible way. In the face of such evidence, Kepler might say, is it not a retrograde step to dismiss as “superfluous” the medium in which the actions foundational to the observed phenomena take place? Isn’t adopting the “postulate” that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant too much like postulating (as astronomers had done for thousands of years) that all celestial bodies move with uniform circular motion? This, then, is what I think Kepler would say to Einstein. And I could stop here, but in all fairness, we need to let Einstein respond. I think Einstein would point out two problems, one cosmic in scale and one inherent in electromagnetic theory as it was then formulated. The first is related to the ether itself: are we moving through it, or is it moving along with us? If we are moving through it, then waves would seem to us to be moving faster in some directions and slower in others. But when we measure the speed of light, it seems to be pretty much the same in all directions. It gets worse: the speed of electromagnetic waves, as deduced from Maxwell’s equations, is determined by the ratio of the two fundamental electrical and magnetic constants. These are the physical constants that seem, both conceptually and experimentally, to be independent of coordinate systems, and that determine the “springiness” of the medium. In junior lab, every spring, we do a lovely experiment that gives us a number for this ratio, and our number (perhaps surprisingly) is pretty close to what the textbooks say it should be. And further, when (in a second beautiful experiment) we measure the speed of light directly (using a tape measure and a tuning fork), the number we get is not too far from the ratio in the previous experiment. So we are left with a dilemma: either the fundamental electromagnetic 10 �constants are somehow coordinate-system dependent so that they match the measured motion of our coordinate system through the ether, or there is a preferred coordinate system for the entire universe in which we happen to be absolutely at rest. It’s hard to imagine what the first horn of the dilemma even means, while the second horn basically throws out all cosmological thinking since Copernicus. We can call this problem the “ether wind” problem. The other thing Einstein would say is that in his view, this whole dilemma associated with the ether is just a side issue: his concern, which he thinks was a much more fundamental problem, was the asymmetry in the way Maxwellian electrodynamics applies to magnets and wires. As Einstein put it, in the passage quoted earlier in this lecture, “If the magnet is in motion and the conductor is at rest, there arises in the neighborhood of the magnet an electric field with a certain definite energy, producing a current at the places where parts of the conductor are situated. But if the magnet is stationary and the conductor in motion, no electric field arises in the neighborhood of the magnet. In the conductor, however, we find an electromotive force, to which in itself there is no corresponding energy, but which gives rise—assuming equality of relative motion in the two cases discussed—to electric currents of the same path and intensity as those produced by the electric forces in the former case.” Restating this in a slightly different way, if you have an observer who sees the magnet moving through the coil of wire, she sees an electric field in the space surrounding the magnet, and this field embodies a definite amount of energy. Another observer, moving uniformly along with the magnet, will see no electric field, and the same space will now be devoid of energy. But energy is a conserved entity. So we have a theory that has lost what later physicists have called “local 11 �reality”: for one observer some real thing is there which according to the laws of physics is not there for the other observer. Thus, the whole idea of objective reality has broken down, which, you may imagine, is a big no-no for a physical theory. So Einstein’s response is to adopt the two “postulates,” mentioned earlier, by which he will solve both the ether wind problem and the objective reality problem. His claim is that abandoning the idea of a physically real medium in which electromagnetic waves occur is a price worth paying for saving the claim of physics to represent objective reality. So, Kepler, what might you have had to say in response to Einstein’s powerful reply? It is clear from our brief look at Astronomia Nova Ch. 2, and from many other places in the book, that Kepler believed it was wrong to allow a physically unsupported postulate (uniform circular motion) to overrule principles, even if they are provisional or conjectural, that are supported by physical arguments. As he put it, we need “a body or real quality” as a foundation. Although he was open to a wide range of examples and analogies that would constitute “real qualities,” a simple rule lacking such support, such as the constancy of the speed of light, would not do. Although Kepler would have acknowledged it as a clever and ingenious solution, it would remind him too much of the many astronomers of his day who rejected his “celestial physics” (a term featured prominently on the title page of Astronomia Nova) and reverted to the circular tracks and angelic movers of the old astronomy. What would have to be done instead, Kepler would say, would be to solve the ether wind problem and the local non-reality problem without abandoning the physical 12 �basis of electromagnetic radiation. This would surely be a difficult task. But would it be more difficult than establishing a sound physical basis for planetary motion? I’ll finish this lecture by saying a few things in support of Kepler’s advice. Not that I consider Kepler’s position is in need of support—it seems to me one of the really deep questions—but to show that, despite what seems to be the unanimous acceptance of Einstein’s two postulates, there has been, and continues to be, a quiet but respectable undercurrent among physicists, a willingness to wonder whether despite the remarkable success of Einstein’s relativity theory, its unsupported second postulate might turn out to have been a mistake. The first direct attempt to determine a possible motion of the earth through the ether was carried out in 1881 by A. A. Michelson, in Potsdam, Germany. Michelson nonetheless noted that the problem had already been approached by Stokes (in 1846) and later by Maxwell (1878). The more famous Michelson-Morley experiment, which used a much larger instrument, followed in 1887. These purely experimental results, which showed no measurable motion, set a problem for the theorists to solve. The approach that appeared most promising at first was that some of the ether was being dragged along by the earth; however, no one succeeded in demonstrating such a phenomenon. A competing account was suggested by Oliver Heaviside’s conclusion, on the basis of Maxwell’s electromagnetic theory, that electromagnetic fields contracted along the direction of their motion. In 1895, H. A. Lorentz published an article in which he proposed that, like electromagnetism, the forces that hold the particles of material bodies together also contract in the direction of motion. He writes, 13 �“Thus one would have to imagine that the motion of a solid body (such as a brass rod or the stone disc employed in the later experiments) through the resting ether exerts upon the dimensions of that body an influence which varies according to the orientation of the body with respect to the direction of motion. … “Surprising as this hypothesis may appear at first sight, yet we shall have to admit that it is by no means far fetched, as soon as we assume that molecular forces are also transmitted through the ether, like the electric and magnetic forces of which we are able at the present time to make this assertion definitely.” In 1904 (the year preceding Einstein’s Special Relativity article), Lorentz published a more thorough treatment of the same basic idea. In the interim, Poincaré had argued that electromagnetic forces alone were insufficient to produce Lorentz’s contraction, and added an additional hypothetical force. However, as Lorentz notes, Poincaré also objected to this piecemeal approach. Lorentz writes: “Poincaré has objected to the existing theory of electric and optical phenomena in moving bodies that, in order to explain Michelson’s negative result, the introduction of a new hypothesis has been required, and that the same necessity may occur each time new facts will be brought to light.” Lorentz believed that by “starting from the fundamental equations of the theory of electrons,” he could “treat the subject with a better result.” The article that followed is a tour-de-force of Maxwellian analysis, packed with equations dealing with such matters as the electromagnetic inertia of electrons. At this point, Lorentz’s fundamental revision brought his theory, which avoided Einstein’s second postulate, into agreement with Einstein, as far as the observations were concerned. But by a strange turn of events, a series of 14 �experiments by Walter Kaufmann (involving the mass of high-speed electrons rather than motion through the ether) appeared to show that the Einstein/Lorentz predictions were wrong, and that rival theories of Max Abraham and Alfred Bucherer produced more accurate results. Lorentz conceded that Bucherer’s theory was “decidedly unfavorable to the idea of a contraction, such as I attempted to work out.” Einstein, on the other hand, acknowledged that the Abraham and Bucherer theories fit the data better than his own, but wrote, “they have a small probability of being correct since they produce complicated expressions for the mass of a moving electron.” In other words, theoretical simplicity trumps agreement with the data! But now Planck entered the fray, with a meta-analysis of Kaufmann’s numbers, which tipped the balance back in favor of Einstein and Lorentz. And in 1914, refined experiments by Günther Neumann (using Kaufmann’s own equipment with some modifications) appeared to favor Einstein decisively. The curious result of this was that, even though Einstein’s and Lorentz’s theories were essentially in agreement in most of their predictions, Einstein’s ether-free approach came to be viewed as the victor. Nevertheless, attempts to find an “ether wind” continued. The most extensive work was by Dayton Miller, a prominent American physicist who was president of the American Physical Society in 1926. His measurements extended over nine years and, by one account, comprised over five million individual measurements. His primary aim was to show a difference between the ether drift at low elevations (essentially none) and at the summit of Mt. Wilson. He claimed to have found that the solar system is moving towards the constellation Dorado through the ether at a speed of 227 km/s, a result that was similar to independent measurements by the French astronomer Ernest Esclangon and the Swiss 15 �astronomer Leopold Courvoisier. These results have been questioned on various grounds, but were well-received at the time and have never been adequately repeated, according to one scholar whom I know personally and whose work I respect. It appears that the remarkable success of both the special and general theories of relativity have made a search for ether-drift an unattractive career move. However, questions have more recently crept in from an unexpected source: quantum mechanics. Physicist John Bell, in 1964, came up with a purely mathematical theorem that established certain numerical limits to the relatedness of states of certain particles (in this case, polarizations of so-called “entangled photons”). The assumptions upon which the theorem was based were, first, that the particles involved really and actually possess the properties involved (the criterion of “reality”), and second, that communication among the particles cannot occur at speeds faster than light. Naturally, this set a challenge for experimenters: violate Bell’s theorem! The definitive experiment, by Alain Aspect, came along in 1982. It violated the conditions of Bell’s theorem, while remaining entirely consistent with quantum mechanics. In practical terms, this meant that one or both of the assumptions that Bell made would have to be abandoned or modified. Physics would have to give up the idea of local reality, or of what Einstein called “spooky action at a distance,” or perhaps both. One is reminded of what Kepler wrote in Astronomia Nova when he showed that the classically formulated hypothesis of Chapter 16 is inconsistent with the Tychonic observations. He wrote, Therefore, something among those things we had assumed must be false. But what was assumed was: that the orbit upon which the planet moves is a perfect circle; and that there exists some unique point on the line of apsides 16 �at a fixed and constant distance from the center of the eccentric about which point Mars describes equal angles in equal times. Therefore, of these, one or the other or perhaps both are false, for the observations used are not false. So, in light of the Aspect experiment, what gets thrown out? A variety of solutions have been proposed, but I will conclude this lecture with what John Bell himself said, in a discussion with BBC producer J. R. Brown and physicist P. C. W. Davies. Question: Bell’s inequality is, as I understand it, rooted in two assumptions: the first is what we might call objective reality—the reality of the external world, independent of our observations; the second is locality, or non-separability, or no faster-than-light signaling. Now, Aspect’s experiment appears to indicate that one of these two has to go. Which of the two would you like to hang on to? Bell: Well, you see, I don’t really know. For me it’s not something where I have a solution to sell! For me it’s a dilemma. I think it’s a deep dilemma, and the resolution of it will not be trivial; it will require a substantial change in the way we look at things. But I would say that the cheapest resolution is something like going back to relativity as it was before Einstein, when people like Lorentz and Poincaré thought that there was an aether—a preferred frame of reference—but that our measuring instruments were distorted by motion in such a way that we could not detect motion through the aether. Now, in that way you can imagine that there is a preferred frame of reference, and in this preferred frame of reference things do go 17 �faster than light. But then in other frames of reference when they seem to go not only faster than light but backwards in time, that is an optical illusion. Question: Well, that seems a very revolutionary approach! Bell: Revolutionary or reactionary, make your choice. Behind the apparent Lorentz invariance of the phenomena, there is a deeper level which is not Lorentz invariant. Question: Of course the theory of relativity has a tremendous amount of experimental support, and it’s hard to imagine that we can actually go back to a pre-Einstein position without contradicting some of this experimental support. Do you think it’s actually possible? Bell: Well, what is not sufficiently emphasized in textbooks, in my opinion, is that the pre-Einstein position of Lorentz and Poincaré, Larmor and Fitzgerald was perfectly coherent, and is not inconsistent with relativity theory. The idea that there is an aether, and these Fitzgerald contractions and Larmor dilations occur, and that as a result the instruments do not detect motion through the aether—that is a perfectly coherent point of view. Let me finish by briefly summarizing the main points of this lecture. Kepler strove mightily throughout his life to oppose the prevalent idea that astronomy must be founded on hypotheses, and that the fundamental and indispensable hypothesis is the principle of regular, uniform circular motion of all 18 �heavenly bodies. He proposed instead that all attempts to understand the cosmos must be founded in some way upon physical reality. As to what constitutes physical reality, we must use familiar examples to try to understand what is less accessible to us, and we may be led to consider accounts or examples that may at first seem far-fetched. But it is a mistake to limit the range of possible explanations within the boundaries of arbitrary postulates. This is what I believe is the advice he would most want to give Einstein. And this is advice that, despite the rolling of eyes at Johns Hopkins, may retain a degree of cogency today. 19 � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource St. John's College Lecture Transcripts—Santa Fe Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Meem Library Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Santa Fe, NM Description An account of the resource Items in this collection are part of a series of lectures given every year at St. John's College at the Santa Fe, NM campus. Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data Word doc Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 19 pages Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource What would Kepler say to Einstein? Description An account of the resource Transcript of a lecture given on November 5, 2021 by William Donahue as part of the Dean's Lecture and Concert Series. The Dean's Office provided this description of the event: "Einstein once wrote that there is little value, other than the satisfaction of intellectual curiosity, in studying scientific works of the past. Kepler would not agree, and were he alive today he would criticize Einstein for repeating errors of early science. This lecture will begin by exploring some of Kepler’s views on past failures, and then will apply Kepler’s criticism to Einstein’s views, especially his rejection of the ether. The inquiry will then consider the alternative account proposed by H. A. Lorentz, showing how the contraction of bodies at high velocities was deduced from Maxwell’s electrodynamics without abandoning the ether. The lecture then concludes by considering remarks of more recent physicists, most notably John Bell, on the possibility of reviving the ether to solve the local reality problem in quantum physics." Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Donahue, William H. Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Santa Fe, NM Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2021-11-05 Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource Meem Library has been given permission to make this item available online. Type The nature or genre of the resource text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Subject The topic of the resource Kepler, Johannes, 1571-1630 Language A language of the resource English Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context SF_DonahueW_What_would_Kepler_say_to_Einstein_2021-11-05 Friday night lecture https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/3594de41b34f9283c71e5baa844b4f8d.pdf 6b6bc4adabbb70a5b32444eefa820c24 Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Colloquy Description An account of the resource A student-run journal for the Graduate Institute community of St. John's College in Annapolis, Maryland. The issues feature essays, art, poetry, interviews, and more. Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data paper (bound book) Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 54 pages Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Colloquy, Fall 2018 Description An account of the resource Volume IV of the Colloquy, published in Fall 2018. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dorchester, Andrew (editor) Marquez, Jaime (editor) Poyner, Jordan (editor) Trovato, Jenifer (editor) Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2018-11 Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Type The nature or genre of the resource text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Language A language of the resource English Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Collquy-Volume IV-Fall 2018 Reduced Size Graduate Institute Student publication https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/eb46bd946dda54dec85c3c9375f4c0eb.pdf ff002e00789a96ac73c9d585e56f72b7 PDF Text Text Volume V Spring 2019 2017 Alumni Association Award-Winning Essay Joseph M. Keegin Conversation with Paul Ludwig Zachary N. Greene The Joy of Recognition Moral Intuition in War and Peace In Defense of the Literature Segment Emily Langston Joseph Hiles Patrick Burley Louis Petrich Five Poems Three Essays on Euclid Master’s Essay Précis Conversation with Jim Phillips A Journal of the Graduate Institute at St. John’s College �COLLOQUY St. John’s College, 60 College Avenue, Annapolis, Maryland Volume V: Spring 2019 Editorial Board Jordan Poyner, Editor-in-Chief Andrew Dorchester Zachary N. Greene Jaime Marquez Colloquy is a biannual publication of the Graduate Institute at St. John’s College in Annapolis, Maryland. Subscriptions are free. To subscribe or update your subscription, please send an e-mail to colloquy@sjc.edu with the subject line “Subscription.” Address correspondence to: Colloquy, The Graduate Institute at St. John’s College, 60 College Avenue, Annapolis, Maryland 21401. Students, tutors, and alumni of St. John’s College and the Graduate Institute are encouraged to submit manuscripts in PDF or Word format by email to colloquy@sjc.edu. Writers are encouraged to discuss proposals with an editor prior to submitting their work. The journal also accepts submissions of poetry, artwork, and photography. Please include your name, contact information, and the title of your work with your submission. Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in essays or interviews do not necessarily reflect those of St. John’s College or Colloquy. ©2019 Colloquy, St. John’s College. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited. �TABLE OF CONTENTS Letter from the Editors .................................................................................... 3 MATHEMATICS The Joy of Recognition Emily Langston, Tutor ............................................................................... 5 A Student’s Apology: Confronting Myself in the Study of Geometry Jaime Marquez ............................................................................................. 10 The Architecture of Reductio ad Absurdum Alejandro Ehrenberg .................................................................................. 17 Does Euclid Start with Axioms? Derek Foret .................................................................................................. 22 LITERATURE 2017 Alumni Association Award-Winning Essay: “Home” Joseph M. Keegin ........................................................................................ 45 In Defense of the Literature Segment Patrick Burley.............................................................................................. 71 Moral Intuitions in Tolstoy’s War and Peace Joseph Hiles ................................................................................................. 101 MASTER’S ESSAY PRÉCIS On Education: A Reading of Hegel’s Phenomenology of Spirit Sean Foley..................................................................................................... 75 Hope in Paradise Lost Samuel Peregrin ........................................................................................... 79 The Flaying of Marsyas Maxwell Anthony ........................................................................................ 81 �CONVERSATIONS Paul Ludwig, Tutor .............................................................................................. 30 Jim Phillips ........................................................................................................... 84 POETRY Louis Petrich, Tutor .............................................................................................. 59 Maxwell Anthony ................................................................................................. 83 Patricia Harden .................................................................................................... 112 Artwork by Andrew Dorchester, Patricia Harden, Adam Hurwitz, Jaime Marquez, and Brandon Wasicsko Jaime Marquez �Letter from the Editors Dear Readers, We are thrilled to present the fifth issue of Colloquy. In this issue we have attempted to represent a portion of the serious thinking and questioning that goes on in the Graduate Institute. As has been demonstrated in previous issues, there are many ways to make that attempt. It seems worth noting that while essays predominate in this issue, this may not follow in the long term. Colloquy is so new a publication as to admit of trial and experiment. The goal—ambiguous though it may be—is to continue the conversation. In that spirit, much of the writing in this issue relates to the conversation which is held every fall at the Graduate Institute in Annapolis. Our essays address the subjects of the courses offered for the fall semester: literature and mathematics. Our hope is that this issue might serve as a companion to conversations past and a catalyst for conversation in the future. For our next issue we are soliciting writing from students, tutors, and alumni that make use of the Great Books to investigate questions of political, philosophical, and theological import. Conversations change of course—yet the form of education one participates in at St. John’s suggests that the greatest conversations are peculiarly perennial. –The Colloquy Editorial Board 3 �Jaime Marquez 4 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 The Joy of Recognition Emily Langston Emily Langston is Associate Dean of Graduate Programs at St. John’s College in Annapolis, Maryland. The following is excerpted from her welcoming speech to the new class of Graduate Institute students starting in spring of 2019. It’s been my practice to write these addresses based upon something that I’ve read with Graduate Institute students over the past semester. And so, this afternoon, I find myself giving a convocation address based on what we read together in the tutorial of the Mathematics & Natural Science segment of the Graduate Institute program. I’m happy to have a reason, even if self-imposed, to address this topic. First of all, this tutorial is one I love to lead, and it raises questions that I enjoy thinking about. Secondly and perhaps surprisingly, it often ends up being one of the favorite tutorials even of students who initially approached it with some trepidation. It’s this second point that is the starting point for my reflections today. I’ll start my investigation with the name, specifically with the word “mathematics.” Our English word “mathematics” comes from the Greek noun, ta mathemata, which in turn is related to the verb manthano, meaning “I learn, I perceive, I understand, I know.” Ta mathemata, then—or in English, “mathematics”—are the most characteristically knowable things. But, as I have already suggested, this is certainly not everyone’s experience of math. I often have conversations with students who tell me that they are “not math people,” that they “just don’t get math.” They are frustrated because they have encountered this subject that still today is seen as a model of the knowable, as unknowable and even alien. Still—thanks to the intellectual curiosity without which you wouldn’t be here—most of those who are initially hesitant give it a try. And, as we begin working our way through Book I of Euclid’s Elements, students almost invariably begin to 5 �Emily Langston / The Joy of Recognition find that somehow these things are “knowable” after all. As I suggested, seeing the joyful response of students to this realization is one of the reasons I love leading this tutorial. So can we say more about how this great thing comes to pass? The fact that mathematics claims to be about the “knowable,” and the fact that we (and I do mean all of us!) can experience it as knowable, begs one of the most profound questions that we confront in every segment of the Graduate Institute curriculum. What is it to know? What do we mean when we say something is “knowable?” The question is placed squarely in front of us by Plato’s dialogue Meno, the one text I know we all have in common; at the very heart of this dialogue we find a mathematical example functioning as a case study in what it is to learn and to know. The specific demonstration is hard to follow without my drawing lines in the sand for us to examine, though I assure you it repays every bit of attention you can give to it. In the absence of any sand, I will lay these details aside and move to what I take to be one of the important lessons Socrates would have us glean from the example; the myth he recounts claims—and the demonstration involving the slave boy is meant to illustrate—that learning is really recollection of something that was already within us. We see it in the dialogue as, at various points, Socrates asks the boy questions about the diagram he is drawing. And the boy, though he has never been taught geometry, is somehow able to look at the diagram Socrates sketches and then turn to something within himself to make a judgment about what has been proposed. The example makes the case that learning involves something like recollection and recognition. Let’s take this suggestion back to the material of the Mathematics tutorial, to our reading of Euclid’s Elements. Perhaps the place where Euclid most explicitly demands that we check something within ourselves and give our assent is in the postulates. The very word “postulate”—which comes from the Latin postulare, meaning to ask or pray—makes the case clear. The claims made in the postulates are not proven to us; we are simply asked to 6 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 accept them. Like the slave boy, who consults something within himself when questioned about various candidates for the side of the double square, we consult something within ourselves when confronted with Euclid’s fifth postulate. The postulate tells us that two straight lines angled so that they are sloping toward one another will eventually meet. Now it’s hard to say exactly what within ourselves we consult when we are asked to assent to the truth of this statement, or where it comes from. Whether it is there due to some previous experience or there inherently I will not here speculate. But surely it is not something that Euclid taught us; it was there already. I will venture a bit further and claim that it seems to be something in the structure of our visual imaginations; and that the act we perform when we ask ourselves whether this postulate is true is more an act of visualization than of reasoning. If I sweep my inner eye far enough along these straight lines that are angled toward one another, I seem to “see” that they must meet. Our recognition of the congruence between what Euclid proposes and what we see with the inner eye is very satisfying and feels like a type of knowledge. “But wait!”—those of you who have taken the tutorial may object. This emphasis on recollection and recognition may work well enough with the postulates, which are a special case. But what about the material with which we actually begin the Mathematics tutorial—not Euclid’s postulates, but his definitions. To take the first definition, it doesn’t seem true to say that we “already know” a point is that which has no part. Going on to definition two, I certainly can’t visualize a line that is “breadthless length.” Does it make sense to say that in seeking to understand these we refer to our spatial imaginations? Based on my own experience, and on conversations with students over many years, I’ll try to describe part of what happens in the encounter with Euclid in the math tutorial: somehow—as we examine the possibilities determined for us by the definitions, common notions, and postulates, and move proposition by proposition through book one of the Elements—a spatial world is described which seems to coincide with our 7 �Emily Langston / The Joy of Recognition own lived and intuited experience of space. By this I mean that the clumsy attempts at straight lines we draw on the chalkboard, and the only somewhat more precise ones that mark the edge of the board, behave (always within the limits of their gross imperfections) like Euclidean “breadthless lengths” would behave. The love affair that almost every student has with Euclid springs partly from the fact that Euclid takes our own sense of interior and exterior space and re-presents it to us for our delighted recognition. I’m making everything overly simple, of course. There are elements to understanding a Euclidean proposition that even analogously are not “seeing.” And even in Book I, Euclid presents me with truths that are confounding to my visual imagination; for example, in Proposition 36, we learn that the two longer sides of a parallelogram can approach each other indefinitely, yet never meet, as the shape is stretched between two parallels. In the end however, contemplating such unexpected truths does not violate our sense of space; rather, it adds an additional element of satisfaction to our reading of Euclid, as we realize that we can learn more about the structure of space than we would ever have seen ourselves by moving step by step through the propositions. Our intuitions about space, and our reason, can inform each other. I hope you all now have at least an inkling of what I’ve been trying to describe; these moments of recognition and increased understanding— when we “see” what Euclid means and agree that space we know really is like that—are moments of exhilaration. These things were in us all along, even in confirmed non-math people! It’s hard to know why we never realized this before. Perhaps it’s simply that no one asked us the right questions. But one of the defining characteristics of Great Books, in the Mathematics & Natural Science segment and in every part of the program, is that they do ask the right questions, and by doing so engage us on many levels. 8 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 As I draw this talk to a close, I’ll note that the coherence we sense between the space Euclid describes and the space we perceive within us, and within which we perceive, is not simply a source of joy—it is a source of wonder, wonder that this should be so. Many students confront this wonder most directly when, somewhat more than halfway through the tutorial, we leave behind the world of Euclid and enter the world of the Russian geometer Nicolai Lobachevski. In ways I won’t attempt to describe, he disrupts entirely the easy alliance I’ve sketched between our study of geometry and our intuitions about space. And yet, this doesn’t keep us from moving forward with Lobachevski, reasoning carefully from one step to another in a sort of space which feels like it is quite definitely not my own. The fact that we can do this opens the door to a host of new questions: about space; about the relationship between knowing and seeing; and about the nature of knowledge itself. I won’t begin to explore these questions here, but I look forward to exploring them throughout the program with many of you. Welcome to the conversation; Welcome to the Graduate Institute! Jaime Marquez 9 �A Student’s Apology: Confronting Myself in the Study of Geometry Jaime Marquez1 Listening to Ms. Langston’s convocation for the Spring 2019 term,2 I felt an unsettling nostalgia about my introduction to Euclid’s geometry. Ms. Langston noted that students “are frustrated because they have encountered a subject that, though still today is seen as a model of the knowable, seems unknowable and even alien.” She also notes that “one of the defining characteristics of Great Books, in the Mathematics and Natural Science segment and in every part of the program, is that they do ask the right questions, and by doing so engage us on many levels.” Furthermore, she asks “What is it to know? What do we mean when we say something is ‘knowable’?”3 Hearing that I realized that to ask what are the right questions is precisely the right question I need to ask: what have I learned from studying geometry at St. John’s? And what does Ms. Langston mean when she says that the Great Books engage us “on many levels”? I would have been more successful dealing with aliens than dealing with my insecurities. Indeed, prior to taking the Math & Natural Science Tutorial, I saw myself as having a solid training in mathematics (calculus, real analysis, statistics, matrix algebra). So I figured that a bunch of triangles would not pose a challenge to me. But in my initial dealings with Book I of Euclid’s Elements, I failed miserably to understand the life of Euclid’s propositions: if we’re just dealing in lines without equations, why is it so hard to get the point? To be sure, the steps, when considered individually, 1 This material is based on an essay that I prepared for Ms. Leah Lasell’s Math & Natural Science Tutorial, Summer 2018. 2 Ed. note: the relevant portion of Ms. Langston’s address precedes this essay. 3 Italics are my own. 10 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 are not difficult to understand or memorize. To me, the problem was that the proofs lacked a mathematical flow: why is the first step in the proof this one and not that one? I saw alternative first steps and I could not discern why they were deemed irrelevant. It felt as though Euclid had tried several starting points, found one that worked, and discarded the others without giving a sense of why. So my initial perception of the propositions in Book I was akin to opening a cookbook with recipes for increasingly elaborate dishes. Proving that I could “cook” such dishes involved memorizing the steps and the sequence. But asking why do I mix this ingredient with that one in this order seemed beside the point: follow this recipe and you will get the dish. All of this changed with Proposition 37 [Fig. 1] Proposition 37: Let ABC and DBC be triangles on the same base BC and in the same parallels AD and BC. I say that the triangle ABC equals the triangle DBC. That these two triangles are equal to each other is not obvious. I could visualize moving points A and D along line EF and not being sure about whether the proposition was correct. Furthermore, the proposition Fig. 1 rests on the assumption that the line EF is parallel to the line BC. So? Did we not prove that already in Propositions 27 and 29? I asked myself. But I chalked my confusion up to the lack of equations or something similar. As we continued proving the rest of the propositions, the fragility of the proof for the parallel postulate became part of our daily conversation: did Euclid actually prove this postulate? I would be lying if I were to say that Postulate 5 was suspect the first time I read it. To me, the postulate said that water is wet. 11 �Jaime Marquez / A Student’s Apology We were not the first to be exposed to this fragility. The Greek philosopher Proclus, who lived in the fifth century CE, noted that Euclid’s fifth postulate was “plausible but not necessary.”4 Indeed, Proclus’s second guessing of Postulate 5 was based on his being aware of the “relation of the hyperbole to its asymptote.”5 Furthermore, as Florence Lewis indicates, there are drafts of the Elements in which Postulate 5 appears as a proposition immediately before Proposition 29 and it is possible that Euclid decided to state it as Postulate 5 because “he could neither prove it nor proceed without it.”6 This observation is not about nitpicking or semantics: if Postulate 5 is incorrect, then much of the subsequent architecture of Book I becomes plausible but not necessary. One may ask: so what if this proposition is just plausible but not necessary? For a mathematician, that is the difference between being alive or not. Indeed, Lewis notes that: In the course of centuries the minds of those interested became clear on one point: they did not wish merely to know whether it was possible to substitute some other assumption for Euclid's, though this question has its interest; they wished to know primarily whether exactly his form of the postulate was logically deducible from his other postulates and established theorems. To change the postulate was merely to re-state the problem.7 Having read these views, I began to wonder why Euclid was included in the program: it must be a mistake. So with my arrogance in full swing, I began crafting mental emails to someone in charge with suggestions about changing the curriculum. And to bolster my case, I went through the Greenfield Library’s archives to check the arguments that were used in the design of the curriculum. And I found a transcript of the discussion at the 4 Florence Lewis, “History of the Parallel Postulate,” The American Mathematical Monthly 27, no. 1 (1920): 16-23. 5 Ibid., 16. 6 Ibid. 7 Ibid., 18. 12 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 curriculum meetings in 1965, a discussion that is fresh, enlightening, and humbling. Yes, there are arguments against the inclusion of Euclid but the counterarguments from Ms. Brann and Mr. Klein are compelling: Ms. Brann: Most of our students have some sort of vague notion of, to use a technical term, an "axiomatic system," when they come to us. When we begin to study Euclid, one of the interesting topics to discuss is whether this is what they had heard rumors of in high school, whether Euclid's "system" is intended to be an arbitrary axiomatic system in the sense they imagined. Well, three years intervene, and we finally come to the senior year when we begin to study modern axiomatics, and it turns out that in fact there exists a world of difference between an Euclidean axiom and an axiom of Hilbert. And though it is in fact the case that we don't do justice to the ramifications of modern axiomatics, I think that we do do justice to the difference between the approaches. And this does make many students feel that they want to go on with the modern side.8 Mr. Klein: I would like only to interject one thing. Euclid is not only a great mathematician. He is also a compiler. There are certain things in Euclid which are incredibly valuable for the student. For example, the simple thing that he hits upon at the very beginning: the fifth postulate. Why is it a postulate. Why is it not a definition? This is of incredible value. To make a student understand that this is not a definition, that on this is based nonEuclidean geometry, the possibility of non-Euclidean geometry, is a great thing.9 Notwithstanding these observations, I kept reading Lewis, who notes that: Gauss's meditations were leading him through tedious and painstaking labors to the conclusion that Euclid's fifth postulate was not deducible from 8 “Seminar Discussion on the Place and Extent of the Teaching of Mathematics in the Liberal Arts Curriculum,” Saint Mary’s College, March 25th–March 27th, 1965 (REF LD 4821.S277), 34-35. 9 Ibid., 41. 13 �Jaime Marquez / A Student’s Apology his other postulates. The minds of those not conversant with the intricacies of the problem might easily rush to the conclusion that Euclid's geometry was therefore untrue, and feel the whole structure of human learning crashing about their ears.10 I wanted to know more about this crashing. So I took Proposition 47 to be the Queen of Book I and worked my way backwards, identifying the chain of propositions that supported it and are connected to Postulate 5 [Fig. 2] My rendering of that chain is as follows (where P stands for postulate and I stands for Proposition):11 Whether Proposition 47 is merely plausible matters not just to mathematicians, but also to anyone who makes a living out of measuring distances on flat surfaces. Indeed, Proposition 47 is one of the most elegant proofs of Pythagoras’s theorem. So if Postulate 5 is unnecessary, then Euclid’s claim to relevance would vanish. This exercise allowed me to visualize a potential mathematical crash and gave me comfort: if it is tough for Gauss, then it is tough for everyone, especially me. Relief came finally when we moved on to Lobachevski’s work. I liked this portion of the curriculum the most because the proofs of his theorems rely on logic with a compelling and selfsustaining flow, instead of the memory that Euclid’s proofs require. Furthermore, Lobachevski’s work relies on conventional mathematics: operators 10 Fig. 2 Lewis 19. To be sure, Proposition 29 influences propositions not shown here and, as a result, they too become plausible instead of necessary; I ignored these other propositions to focus on Proposition 47. 11 14 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 (+ and =), negative numbers, and notation for angles—my kind of thing. But how does Lobachevski’s work relate to the life of Postulate 5? By allowing it to be “uncertain.” Specifically, his Theorem 16 shows that, in his new geometry, the definition of parallel lines does not demand the angle conditions of Proposition 29: lines that are “pinched” need not cut.12 And as Lewis indicates: The question, Is Euclid's fifth postulate logically deducible from his other postulates? is answered by showing that the denial of this postulate while all the others are retained leads to a geometry as consistent as Euclid's own. […]Thus was Euclid "vindicated" in an unexpected manner. Knowingly or not, the wise Greek had stated the case correctly, and only his followers had been at fault in their efforts for improvement.13 Not content with what Lewis says, I consulted Hardy. This is what he has to say about Greek mathematics: The Greeks first spoke a language which modern mathematicians can understand: as Littlewood said to me once, they are not clever schoolboys or ‘scholarship candidates’, but ‘Fellows of another college’. So Greek mathematics is ‘permanent’, more permanent even than Greek literature. Archimedes will be remembered when Aeschylus is forgotten, because languages die and mathematical ideas do not. ‘Immortality’ may be a silly word, but probably a mathematician has the best chance of whatever it may mean.14 Alright, I accepted that I had to suspend whatever arrogant image I had of myself and read Euclid’s propositions as though I was in front of him—all else absent. 12 Lobachevski, N., 1891, The Theory of Parallels, Proposition 16. Lewis, 19. 14 G. H. Hardy, A Mathematician’s Apology (Cambridge University Press, 1967), 81. 13 15 �Jaime Marquez / A Student’s Apology I try to apply this lesson to all the other courses I take at St. John’s, but, needless to say, I always fail. There are moments, however, in which the very act of trying brings unexpected moments of intense joy that are too brief. In a study group on the economist John Maynard Keynes, I came across the following observation from Keynes: The classical theorists resemble Euclidean geometers in a non-Euclidean world who, discovering that in experience straight lines apparently parallel often meet, rebuke the lines for not keeping straight—as the only remedy for the unfortunate collisions which are occurring. Yet, in truth, there is no remedy except to throw over the axiom of parallels and to work out a nonEuclidean geometry. Something similar is required to-day in economics.15 Keynes is as central to economics as Euclid is to geometry. And being the Keynesian that I am, my study of geometry at St. John’s gave me an appreciation for the depth of Keynes’ view that I never had and, via a curriculum discussion about the parallel postulate held more than fifty years ago, I joined a conversation that has lasted more than two thousand years. In the process, I was also given an inkling as to what Ms. Langston meant about by being engaged on many levels (I hope). Jaime Marquez is a Senior Lecturer at the John Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies and a student in the Graduate Institute at St. John’s College in Annapolis, Maryland (AGI’19). He was a Senior Economist on the Federal Reserve Board from 1983 to 2013. 15 John Maynard Keynes, The General Theory of Employment, Interest, and Money (1935), Book I, Chapter 2, Section IV. 16 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 The Architecture of Reductio ad Absurdum Alejandro Ehrenberg If we were to imagine Euclid’s mathematical system as a medieval cathedral, reductio ad absurdum proofs would primarily play the role of flying buttresses. They provide vital support to the whole edifice, and do so from the exterior, where the absurd gargoyles and chimeras live. Why does Euclid use this kind of reasoning instead of restricting himself to direct argumentation? What do reductio proofs contribute to the system developed in Book 1 of the Elements? In order to explore these questions it is pertinent to begin by observing how a specific reductio proof works. Proposition 6 is the first one to be demonstrated in this manner. It is the converse of the immediately preceding proposition. Proposition 5: In isosceles triangles the angles at the base equal one another, and, if the equal straight lines are produced further, then the angles under the base equal one another. Proposition 6: If in a triangle two angles equal one another, then the sides opposite the equal angles also equal one another. These can be expressed more schematically thus: Proposition 5: If a, then b. Proposition 6: If b, then a. It is tempting to assume that, once Euclid has demonstrated the truth of Proposition 5, Proposition 6 only exists for the sake of a complete exposition, but is really redundant. However, after some thought, we can 17 �Alejandro Ehrenberg / The Architecture of Reductio ad Absurdum see that the fact that a entails b does not automatically mean that b entails a. But it is important that it does entail it. Euclid is building an edifice where each level rests upon the previous one: if any given part is weak, the whole is liable to collapse. As an illustration of this, consider the following definition: a square is a four-sided equilateral figure. That this statement is true does not imply that its converse is also true. A definition like this would not do for Euclid’s system of truth, which cannot be built on definitions that read one way are true but read the other are false. Reversibility must be explicitly established. Thus, by way of reductio, Proposition 6 proves that if in a triangle two angles equal one another, then the sides opposite the equal angles also equal one another. The foundation is now firm; the mason can build on. The following question arises: could Euclid have achieved this end through direct argumentation? Put differently, must the reversibility of a proposition be proven by reductio? In this regard, looking at Book 1 as a whole is helpful. A pattern is discernible: almost all converse propositions are demonstrated by reductio. Nevertheless, there are notable exceptions— for some converses, like Proposition 48, are proven directly. If the pattern suggests the existence of some kind of necessity between converses and reductio, the exceptions point to the possibility that argumentation by reductio is, rather, a deliberate choice by Euclid. But surely there is another way to explore the question at hand. By turning our attention once again to Propositions 5 and 6, we will find support for the view that the use of reductio is in fact a carefully considered choice. Proposition 5: If a, then b. Proposition 5 Absurd: If not a, then b. Proposition 6: If b, then a. 18 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Proposition 5 Absurd can only exist when its converse is proven by reductio; direct argumentation is incapable of bringing it out. By means of this intermediate step, Euclid shows that the negation of a does not entail b. This reaffirmation of Proposition 5 is important. If b were the consequence of a and also of not a, then the system as a whole would lose consistency and become weak. Therefore, proving converses through reductio achieves, economically, a double end: to establish reversibility and to ensure consistency. Euclid goes outside the structure he is building, into the region of absurdity, and creates a flying buttress—Proposition 5 Absurd—with which he reinforces the cathedral. Having examined how a particular reductio proof works and perceived the double-end it serves, we are now able to explore more generally the use of reductio throughout Book 1. But first, a word on the book’s structure is in order. There seem to be two parts to it. The first deals mostly with lines, angles, and the relations between them; the universe where this first half takes place is triangular. Then, quite suddenly, at Proposition 29, a change occurs. From here on, Euclid’s focus is directed at parallels and, specifically, parallelogrammic areas. It is worth noting that Proposition 29 is where Postulate 5 is first employed. This proposition is the peak of the first part of Book 1; the second peak, the whole book’s climax, is Proposition 47. Taking this separation into account, we can see that most reductio proofs in Book 1 appear before Proposition 29, which is itself a reductio. Out of a total of 11 such proofs, 9 belong to the book’s first half. Now, if it is true that the purpose of the first half is to be able to enunciate Proposition 29, and that Postulate 5 is required for this purpose, then the following speculation becomes plausible. Euclid knows that Postulate 5 is especially hard to accept: we have no way of knowing, for sure, that the two straight lines in question, when produced indefinitely, will really meet. It is a shaky supposition. He therefore invests a considerable amount of his energies 19 �Alejandro Ehrenberg / The Architecture of Reductio ad Absurdum reaffirming Postulate 5 before actually using it in Proposition 29, which in turn is used copiously in the second part of Book 1. It is worth remembering what Postulate 5 begs the reader to accept: That, if a straight line falling on two straight lines makes the interior angles on the same side less than two right angles, the two straight lines, if produced indefinitely, meet on that side on which are the angles less than the two right angles. In the first half of Book 1, there are 4 propositions that refer directly to Postulate 5: 17, 27, 28, and 29. With the help of Proposition 13 and Definition 23, we can reformulate and reduce them as follows: 17. If two straight lines cut by a third straight line meet, then the interior angles on the side on which the lines meet are less than two right angles. 27. If a straight line falling on two straight lines makes the interior angles equal to two right angles, then the lines will not meet when produced indefinitely. 28. If a straight line falling on two straight lines makes the interior angles equal to two right angles, then the lines will not meet when produced indefinitely. 29. If two straight lines cut by a third straight line do not meet, then the interior angles on the side on which the lines meet are equal to two right angles. The table below presents them in a schematized fashion; it also notes each proposition’s relation to Postulate 5, and whether it is a reductio proof: Postulate 5 Proposition 17 Proposition 27 (reductio) and Proposition 28 Proposition 29 (reductio) If a, then b If b, then a If not a, then not b If not b, then not a Converse Negation of the premise and conclusion that compose Post. 5 Negation of the premise and conclusion that compose the converse Proposition 27 in the process of being proven by reductio reads thus: if b, then not a, which is demonstrated as being absurd. This flying buttress 20 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 reaffirms Proposition 17: b entails a; b does not also entail not a. Not as clear is the statement conjured up by the reductio in Proposition 29: if a, then b, which, in effect, is Postulate 5. In the context of the demonstration, it is absurd because it contradicts the given. Why Proposition 29 goes back to Postulate 5 and not to a previous proposition is a question to be explored in a subsequent essay. For our present purposes it suffices to observe how Euclid has thoroughly reinforced Postulate 5. It has been firmly laid, and supported by a flying buttress. Hereupon the book’s mood changes markedly. Before Proposition 29, Euclid proceeds cautiously, laboriously, even tediously. Now the author seems much more at ease. In the second half of Book 1, Euclid is concerned with the upper part of the cathedral: he is dealing with stained glass and clerestories and spires. Sometimes it seems he is almost doing magic. He cuts up parallelograms into smaller figures and shifts them around to prove things amazing and counterintuitive. In Proposition 47, the two upper squares simply pour into the hypotenuse square; it can only happen thanks to line AL, parallel to BD or CE. And it Fig. 1. Illustration of the proof for can only be described as Proposition 47. beautiful. A native of Mexico City, Mr. Ehrenberg (AGI’19) will offer an oral defense of his Master’s Essay on Don Quijote in spring of 2019. 21 �Does Euclid Start with Axioms? An Attempt to Not Confuse Circles for Lines Derek Foret I can still vividly recall my favorite picture book as a child. It was a story of a little girl, Lily, who said one thing, and one thing only: why? To the frustration of her father, she never felt satisfied with any answer given, forcing him to always resort to saying some variation of “it just is.” One day, while they are at the park, a UFO lands, and aliens announce that their leader wants them to destroy the planet. Lily, of course, asks why. Eventually, the aliens can only say, “he just does.” They realize this is not a satisfactory answer and go back home to think things over. Lily saves the day. However, it is unclear if she even understood that she did. First of all, her dad has to put his hand over her mouth once the aliens announce they are letting the humans live. And at the end of the book, her dad tells her that he was proud of her at the park today. She says what she always says, and he replies, “I just was, Lily. I just was…”1 Euclid brings out the inner Lily in all of us. He compels us to ask why whenever he makes a claim, and we expect an answer from him based not on faith but on what has already been proven. By referring to previous statements, logical inquiry both assumes and guides us towards some sort of beginning. However, herein lies an inherent problem, as a beginning, by definition, has nothing previous to it. According to our modern conception of mathematics—by which I not only mean the technical conceptions of modern mathematicians, but also our popular conception of mathematics 1 22 Lindsay Camp, Why?, illustrated by Tony Ross (Anderson Press, 1998). �Colloquy / Spring 2019 today—we generally think of this beginning as the axioms given. We see these axioms as similar to the definitions, postulates, and common notations that we find at the beginning of Euclid’s Elements2 (what this essay will refer to as the “prelude” for shorthand). We do not want to “have to trust [Euclid’s] word” (10/25/18)3 that any of his steps are justifiable. But simply writing down the prelude does not justify the parts of the prelude, at least not in the same way as Euclid’s propositions are justified through proof. Some great mathematicians have attempted to address this issue. Famed logician and philosopher Bertrand Russell perceived it when he first encountered Euclid. He described encountering the Elements as “one of the great events of my life, as dazzling as first love,” yet, further clarifying, called that love “not unalloyed. I had been told that Euclid proved things, and was much disappointed that he started with axioms. At first I refused to accept them unless my brother could offer me some reason for doing so, but he said: ‘If you don’t accept them we cannot go on.’”4 This bothered Russell so much that it “determined the course of [his] subsequent [mathematical] work.”5 This work culminated in the Principia Mathematica, an attempt to at least reduce mathematics to assumptions made by logic itself (if not to de-axiomatize the field completely). Due to Kurt Gödel’s incompleteness theorems, published a quarter century after the Principia, the mathematical community today now considers Russell’s desire to be 2 All references to Euclid are from the following edition: Euclid, Elements, ed. Dana Densmore & trans. Thomas L. Heath (Green Lion Press with Sheridan Books, 2017). 3 These dated references refer to my personal class notes: Math & Natural Science Tutorial, Fall 2018, Emily Langston, tutor. 4 Bertrand Russell, The Autobiography of Bertrand Russell, vol. I (George Allen & Unwin, 1967), 67. 5 Christopher C. Leary & Lars Kristiansen, A Friendly Introduction to Mathematical Logic, 2nd ed. (Milne Library, 2015), 44. 23 �Derek Foret / Does Euclid Start with Axioms? tenable for smaller systems that make up parts of mathematics6 but not the whole of it. However, modern mathematicians appear to be at peace with this fact. My textbook defends axiomatic mathematics as a way to be “up front about our need to make assumptions […] [acknowledging] our axiom set in every deduction that we write.”7 This is a proper, respectable, and true concession, and it does appear to solve the issue for mathematicians. However, I do not see how this concession would solve the issue for Lily. If concessions satisfied her, her dad would not have had to cover her mouth when the aliens announced they were not going to destroy the planet. As Lily appears to be the personification of logical inquiry itself, this points to a fundamental problem: Gödel may have proved that Lily cannot be fully satisfied, but Gödel does not make Lily go away. Whether or not we are able to truly satisfy her remains a question. Euclid, for his part, gives off the impression that he possesses less of a care for rigorous axiomatization than modern mathematicians. The rest of this essay will explore the question of whether or not this impression is tied to a method for satisfying Lily that differs from (and so may satisfy her more fully than) the modern approach. The assumption that Euclid starts with axioms includes the assumption that mathematical logic is linear. By that, I mean that it travels from a beginning (the axioms) to an end (a final proposition). In this case, the postulates of Book I become different points on a unidirectional line. We tend to think of this structure as logical, which obscures the fact that it is also natural: its linear sequentiality is analogous to how we see the events of our own lives as a narrative throughout time. This is the assumption my 6 For the sake of intellectual honesty, a version of Euclidean geometry is one of these parts. For the mathematics, see: Marvin Jay Greenberg, “Old and New Results in the Foundations of Elementary Plane Euclidean and Non-Geometries,” The American Mathematical Monthly 117, no. 3 (March 2010): 198-219. 7 Leary, Introduction to Mathematical Logic, 44. 24 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 class made when we began our final discussion on Euclid, where we seemed to agree that “we have gone from a point that has no part [Definition 1]—or at least from describing an equilateral triangle [Proposition 1]—to the Pythagorean theorem [Proposition 47]” (10/25/18). If a set of axioms is a foundation of admitted assumptions to which all logical inquiry eventually leads back, then Proposition 1 is certainly not an axiom, as it is both proven and seems to rely on prior concepts (specifically Definition 15, Postulate 1, Postulate 3, and Common Notion 1). So our candidates for what Euclid’s real axioms are lay in what we commonly agree is his beginning: the parts of the prelude. The very fact that we were unsure if we started with Definition 1, the beginning of the prelude, or with Proposition 1 reveals that we were uncertain if the former is an axiomatic starting point. Part of this uncertainty stems from Densmore’s editorial preface, which provides a helpful, although limited, historical argument against treating the prelude as axiomatic: she casts doubt on the authenticity of the prelude due to inconsistencies between the early printed editions in both form and content. However, we do not even need to turn to scholasticism to see that “Euclid may not have been trying to cover the foundation exhaustively in these sections.”8 Putting aside the postulates for now, this is clear in various ways from the content of the definitions and common notions. First, the definitions do not seem to be intended to be a potential student’s first encounter with geometrical ideas. While we may be able to agree that we can understand what it means for a line to be “breadthless length” (Definition 1), it is nigh impossible to explain that understanding without referring to concepts we learned before Euclid. Similarly, the common notions (unlike the postulates) do not read like rules being agreed to but general knowledge being drawn upon. For example, the notion that a part cannot be greater than the whole feels stronger than the claim that if the 8 Dana Densmore, editor’s preface to: Euclid, Elements, xvi. 25 �Derek Foret / Does Euclid Start with Axioms? interior angles on one side of two lines cut by a transversal add up to less than two right angles, those two lines will meet on that side (Postulate 5). The fact that we find potential definitions and common notions in the propositions that are not listed in the prelude (i.e., “parallelogram” in Proposition 35 or the Common Notion 2 equivalent for greater things in Proposition 17) only makes this feel more likely. Most importantly, Euclid never explicitly cites the prelude. While he certainly refers to the concepts found in it, he never refers to them as if they had already been agreed upon. He never writes anything along the lines of “let us draw a circle according to Proposition 2,” or, at the very least, “let us draw a circle as stated in the postulates.” A modern reader naturally supplies this kind of thinking: if one does not remember why one is able to assert something, one can flip back to the relevant earlier proposition or part of the prelude. There is a difference, however, between modern readers justifying a logical step to themselves and said logical step being justifiable as such. Logical justification seems to speak to what Socrates says in the Meno, that “true opinions […] for so long as they stay put, are a noble thing and accomplish all [manner of] good things. Yet […] they aren’t worth much until someone ties them down by means of a calculation of cause.”9 However, true opinions are not made true because they have been adequately tied down; we know this because we are able to tie down false opinions as well. Euclid makes no indication that he thinks of the definitions and common notions as rules that we agreed cannot be broken. Perhaps this stems from a realization that this does not make them Lily-proof: one could easily ask why they cannot be broken. Euclid appears to take a different approach by making the question of why self-answering. For example, he implicitly uses the notion of a circle in Proposition 1 to argue that two radii are equal. If 9 26 Plato, Meno, trans. Robert C. Bartlett, 97e-98a. �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Lily were to ask why this were true, she would either be confused as to why they are both radii, which a good tutor could clear up, or she would be asking why are the radii of a circle equal? The question answers itself: because they are radii of a circle. Asking why again creates an infinite regress, an absurdity. Euclid explicitly uses another concept of absurdity in his arguments by reductio ad absurdum (as we refer to them). In Proposition 6, for example, he gets to a place where he seemingly violates Common Notion 5, as, due to his assumptions, his logic has lead him to say that a part (the triangle DBC) is equal to a whole (ACB) [Fig. 1]. He does not explicitly argue something like ‘this goes against Common Notion 5, which we agreed to, and so we have a contradiction’. Instead, he simply says: “the less [is equal] to the greater: which is absurd.”10 Now, whether or not Common Notion 5, as written, could be violated without absurdity is a question that would require an exploration of mathematics that deals with infinity.11 However, if one only looks at the notion as it is referenced in Proposition 6 specifically, a violation would always be absurd: “the less” (DBC) cannot be equal Fig. 1. Triangle BAC from to “the greater” (ACB) due to the nature Proposition 6. of the two triangles. Turning to what we previously put aside, our final candidates for axioms are the postulates. While I do not have the space to offer a full analysis of 10 Euclid, Elements, Book I, Proposition 6. One might be able to argue, for example, that there are “as many” even numbers as there are counting numbers, as (2, 4, 6…) can be listed next to (1, 2, 3…). So a part of the counting numbers is equal to its totality. But whether or not infinity can be a whole is unclear. 11 27 �Derek Foret / Does Euclid Start with Axioms? them, we can compare them with the definitions and common notions. Like the definitions and common notions, they are never explicitly referenced. Unlike them, however, they do not seem Lily-proof in the same way, as they do read more like rules being agreed to,12 and absurdity cannot be invoked. Lily could ask why, if the interior angles of two lines cut by a transversal add up to less than two right angles, those two lines must meet on the side of those angles—Lobachevski certainly did. Yet the way Euclid implicitly invokes the postulates may share a similar self-answering character as seen above. He states logical claims that rely on the first three postulates in the same way as he states claims that rely on previous QEFs:13 by using the Ancient Greek third person imperative, translated as let x be.14 This is a complicated notion as the third person imperative does not have a precise equivalent in English.15 Other than Euclid, God uses it in the Septuagint translation of the Bible (e.g., “let there be light”). The connection it offers is that “the mere act of speaking suffices to bring about the truth of what is being said.”16 This points to a notion of selfexplanation: that the why of the action is found in the action itself. If fully achievable, this would allow Lily to be completely satisfied by virtue of doing the proposition. Is there a similar notion underlying the last two postulates: Postulates 4 and 5? Euclid does not use the third person imperative when referring to their 12 Proclus defines a postulate as a “statement [that is] unknown and nevertheless [...] taken as true without the student’s conceding it.” Robert B. Williamson, translator’s introduction to Selections from Nikolai Lobachevski’s Theory of Parallels, published by the Graduate Institute at St. John’s College. 13 Euclid uses two different kinds of proofs: QEFs (i.e., quod erat faciendum) when something is being constructed and QEDs (i.e., quod erat demonstrandum) when something is not. 14 For example, Euclid invokes Postulate 2 by saying “let the circle BCD be described” in Proposition 1 and invokes Proposition 1 by saying “let the equilateral triangle DAB be constructed” in Proposition 2. 15 Cf. Alfred Mollin & Robert Williamson, An Introduction to Ancient Greek, 3rd ed. (University Press of America, 1997), 69. 16 Ibid. 28 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 concepts, but perhaps Postulates 4 and 5 somehow relate to the QEDs in a similar way to how Postulates 1–3 relate to the QEFs. But how do the QEDs differ from the QEFs? Last semester, it appeared that my class had our greatest moments of clarity when discussing QEDs. For example, after we went through Proposition 21, we not only felt like we knew how, logically, the proposition was true, but also why, in a way, it was true. We felt like we could see why an interior angle like BDC would be greater than an extreme angle like BAC [Fig. 2] for any triangle we considered. These moments are exciting and pleasurable: they feel similar to an encounter with something overwhelmingly beautiful. Fig. 2. Triangle BAC from Proposition 21. Turning back to the Meno, Socrates labels the process of tying down as “recollection,” which he previously identified as “searching and learning as a whole.”17 In these moments, logic seems to shift from a line to the commonly used metaphor of a circle.18 We remember something that we already knew: our searching, or asking why, becomes our learning, or our answering of why. It is here, then, that we can perhaps imagine Lily fully satisfied. It is as if she could ride a Euclidean carousel round and round again, eventually both asking and answering in the same place. Derek Foret (AGI’20) is a student in his second-semester at the Graduate Institute and a Senior Resident for Student Activities on campus. He is a Kenyon College alumnus interested in ancient political philosophy and its clash with science and mathematics. He can be reached at dforet@sjc.edu. 17 18 Plato, Meno, 98a & 81d. Cf. Aristotle, Physics, Book VIII, Ch. 9–10. 29 �A Conversation with Paul Ludwig Zachary N. Greene Zachary Greene: Where did you go to graduate school? You went to a couple different places, right? Paul Ludwig: I graduated from [The University of] Tennessee– Chattanooga in 1987, and then I went to Oxford, England, studied English and Italian literature. You could do both in a weird combo. In one way it was not graduate school, because it was a second bachelor’s, which at the time was not so unusual. Oxford was considered so much greater, on a different plane, that a lot of North Americans would go to do a second B.A. Partly it was a bit of an indulgence too. But it was considered a pretty good degree. Actually at the time—I’m not sure if they are still doing this, but their B.A. turned into a master’s if you waited for three to five years, or something like that. If you went through another ceremony, it automatically converted as if it were so great to begin with. The education was better than what I was used to, though some Ivy League students complained about it. It was a really good overview of English and Italian Literature. ZG: Complained in what sense? PL: Well, they hated the weather and called Britain “Fantasy Island,” a TV show at the time—Mr. Roarke and Hervé Villechaize. They thought what they were getting was not as sophisticated as at Harvard, although I think they got a lot more personal attention because it was pretty much one-onone with your tutor, usually two different tutors once per week each. Other than that, there wasn’t too much supervision, you just got two stacks of books and were told to write an essay on each stack, and that’s what you did each week for two years. 30 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 ZG: Was there less emphasis on dialogue at Oxford comparatively to St. John’s? PL: Yes, you didn’t tend to talk to your fellow students except outside of class. Now, there was good dialogue, but it was a bit more like the Higher Gossip [documentary film series] that you guys are pursuing now. It was not quite serious discussion. They used to joke that you shouldn’t talk shop. The joke was that you didn’t want to show you were making any effort at Oxford. Very aristocratic in that way, it was a holdover. I’m sure it has changed, I hope it has changed. The really smart people didn’t have to study at all, they got a first-class degree without any effort whatsoever. I suppose there really were some people like that, but most people who did well had to study fairly hard. My tutor told me this at the time—I don’t know if I really knew anybody that did this, so perhaps it was a holdover from a holdover, but what you would do is study late at night when no one knew. After the partying was done and you had already hit the bars, you would do your studying and you would do something to your face to look like you hadn’t been up all night, a hot pack or a cold pack or something on your head. Then you would surprise everybody at the end because there was just one exam at the end—no continuous assessment. So when you scored really high on that, everyone would be like, “Wow, he did no work at all,” and that would blow people’s mind and it would be the gold standard. — My conversations with tutors were wonderful and conversations with fellow students were very good. There was a lot of leisure, it was more leisurely than St. John’s or any American university. Although I didn’t do the party thing at a state school, despite going to a state school, so perhaps I wouldn’t know. Most people at Oxford were studying their pleasures, and pleasing themselves in rather sophisticated ways. I didn’t do everything everybody did, but there were odd things. The students would want to have a ball, and they would get money to have a ball, which is a dance as I 31 �A Conversation with Paul Ludwig thought of it. But as part of the ball, they would pay for a festival of rides to come into the quad of the college with roller coasters and such. Drinking was pretty intense, but they seemed to have been at it longer. At Tennessee–Chattanooga, people would get utterly smashed. At Oxford they would drink slowly, and get more and more smashed as the night went on, but this could go on for quite a while. You could ride these things for hours, so I don’t think they were doing so badly overall. It wouldn't be the lifestyle that I would choose for myself in perpetuity, but at the time it was great. — After Oxford, I did Social Thought at Chicago for the Ph.D. In between I got a master’s because I realized you can’t get a job in social thought. As my advisor put it, “You didn’t come here because it's the best social thought department in the U.S., you came here because there are no other social thought departments in the U.S.” I realized I wasn’t going to get a social thought job, and decided I would major in classics. I retroactively applied for a master’s in classics because I had taken a lot of classics classes with those professors. So I had a B.A., B.A., M.A., Ph.D., and that was finally it—it was enough. ZG: What was your focus when you were at the Committee on Social Thought? PL: Greek and a little bit of Latin was a focus. I had really gone there because I was very interested in Allan Bloom’s book The Closing of the American Mind, and I really wanted to study with him. That meant political philosophy, whatever that is. Not every political science department would even consider it a thing. I had those two foci, and neither one was a hot ticket to any professional life post-graduation. I got interviews at both political science departments and classics departments, so it wasn’t utterly self-destructive. From the pure learning point of view, both were fantastic. The classics department was very interesting indeed. Although I didn’t get 32 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 a whole lot out of political science as a department, there were Allan Bloom, Nathan Tarcov, and Ralph Lerner, who was my initially assigned advisor. And I never took proper advantage of all he had to offer, which was just idiocy on my part. There were wonderful visiting people like Clifford Orwin, who did Thucydides one year, which was the best course I really ever took. Then Leon Kass was there, and he taught the book of Genesis and the Nicomachean Ethics. These were two or three quarter-long courses, kind of line by line, wonderful philosophizing about those things. You, Mr. Interviewer, happen to be in my Nicomachean Ethics class right now, and a lot of what you are hearing is partially digested, regurgitated stuff I got from Leon Kass’s wonderful teaching. I probably can’t even express it properly, I’m probably feeling it more than you’re hearing it. ZG: Our Nicomachean Ethics class is probably the best class I’ve taken at St. John’s College. How in-depth we go into the text and how much we go to the Greek, which provides such a valuable context. This is actually one of the questions I wanted to ask you about. Why should a Graduate Institute student take Ancient Greek? Many of our [students] are out of school now. What is the point of taking an ancient language? It’s somewhat impractical to a certain extent. PL: Right, most aren’t going to grow up to be classicists. Well, a few of you are, people have been getting interested that way. ZG: There are some students in our class that are incredible at the language… and there are others that are not. But we see the value in going to the original language of a text, and considering it in that form, which provides something important to the conversation. PL: It feels strange for me to be an advocate plugging Greek [in the Graduate Institute] because I spent so many years as a tutor neglecting it. Not really knowing—well, I guess I knew on some level [that] the Graduate Institute did something like freshman language. It was odd: it was taught 33 �A Conversation with Paul Ludwig by tutors I didn’t know well, who were themselves part-time tutors that did not always teach in the undergraduate program and were not well known to their colleagues. There tended to be a little anti-Graduate Institute prejudice, that somehow it was a lite version of the Program, and we didn't always put the very best tutors in the Graduate Institute. There might have been real reasons for that, it started out as a way to offer accreditation to teachers in the Annapolis area. You guys who are from someplace else who move in here to do the [graduate program]—I think there were always some like that, but you guys have become a majority. In a way, you’re the students I’m most focused on at the moment. I think that prejudice against those kind of teachers was a little silly, and the classes were always very mixed. In Jon Tuck’s Higher Gossip interview, he mentions he got to the Graduate Institute somehow early in his tenure here, and he was teaching a poem by Matthew Arnold or some such poet, and one of the students was the Andrew Dorchester 34 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 leading expert in this poetry who had just wanted to come out of retirement to do St. John’s. That was pretty early in the history of the Institute, and so my sort of prejudice was just ridiculous. I hope all that is safely in the past. I got interested in teaching Greek [in the Graduate Institute] many years after I taught other [classes there], I had taught several. My best friend at the college, Mrs. Mera Flaumenhaft, was teaching it quite recently. She told me, “You've really got to think about this because these students really want to be there. They come an extra night each week.” Maybe you guys have put a number on it, can you quantify how much harder it is to do the Greek preceptorial? ZG: I started the program in the summer, which was fairly intensive. I did the Republic with Mr. Pastille, and I had to put in a lot of hard work. The Republic is not an easy text. Comparative to starting Greek in the fall and now finishing it in the spring, I’ve had to put in at least twice as much effort. The second class per week adds quite a bit, especially when you consider translations, exercises, and trying to do some more on top of that to try and cement things. How easy is it to cement Ancient Greek in a semester? Well, it’s not. It’s quite a bit of extra work. PL: To have students with that kind of dedication, as opposed to the undergraduates—all freshmen have to take ancient Greek—I’ve had wonderful undergraduate students of Greek, but to have the dedication of a small cohort of four or five great graduate students who really want to be there makes a very different sort of conversation. I think in some ways tutors don’t realize what’s out there. You guys all come with an undergraduate degree, and for a lot of you this is a stepping stone to something else. A blind tutor might think, “Oh they’re just stepping on us to get to something else.” But come on! That’s the kind of thing we want. That we are your springboard means there’s something really good here that you’re not going to get somewhere else. It shows in the quality of discussions, and the speediness in which you go through Mollin and Williamson. You do as much or more philosophizing about language as the 35 �A Conversation with Paul Ludwig freshmen do, but getting through it in a semester as opposed to a semesterand-a-half or even longer, or not getting through it... I’ve actually finished all twenty lessons in the two cycles I’ve taught it, which is very unusual. Even when Mrs. Flaumenhaft taught the Greek preceptorial, she never got past twelve or fourteen lessons. For us to be able to do twenty, and have the better part of a semester to just concentrate on one book—at last, we can actually see it in the original, not every passage, but the important ones. It makes a big difference. — I’m now teaching classics at the graduate level, in a sense, which I wasn't doing before, which makes me better from a professional point of view. In addition to just learning a heck of a lot more because you guys have more experience in the world. Very important in a work like the Ethics: young people can’t learn it. Aristotle himself would say you’re wasting this on the freshmen, that's just a necessary glitch of the Program. A difference in the Graduate Institute is that you study things topic by topic, so you remember Aristotle while you’re reading Hobbes. As opposed to the chronological way the undergraduates do it. In a way, they've forgotten more than you’ve ever known. What would be the right way to put it? There’s a balance there, both ways have their virtues, but each also has its vice. So for me, it has been wonderful, I can’t imagine a better way of spending two nights per week. ZG: Currently, we are in the second semester and we are reading the Nicomachean Ethics, as we’ve mentioned. You are currently working on a piece on civic friendship, which is towards the end of the book. We haven’t actually gotten there yet. Would you care to tell us about that? PL: It’s weird I got started on this almost sixteen years ago. I had done my dissertation, which became a book, on eros and political philosophy, and whether they had anything to do with one another—I claimed they did. It seemed like a natural move to go on to another type of love, from eros to 36 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 philia. It also seemed like a quick kind of thing—I know a lot about emotions already, this could be a quick rip-off. It became much more involved very quickly. I’ve gone through many phases of feeling I knew something, then realizing I was ignorant, then scratching my way back to thinking I knew something, and realizing “wow, talk about ignorance, glad I didn’t publish that!” Learning remains a dialectical process, even if you’re doing it by yourself with either dead or distant interlocutors. — The whole need in America for civic friendship, the terrible polarization in a way and really hostility that we are living through now—all that came later. I joke that if I had been smarter about this and got this out earlier, I could have prevented all that and we would be fine. So in a way, events have caught up with the book and made it more relevant than when I first started. I think political communities are forms of friendship. They don’t look like it because they pale in comparison to personal friendships, which have the sheer emotional affect you feel for your close friends. I think we feel something analogous to that with fellow citizens without realizing it. In a way it’s comparative or contrastive: think about how you feel about fellow citizens compared to how you feel about foreigners, even if they are living in our country. We aren’t quite as worried about what they are like. Various hatreds have arisen against immigrants, and that's unfortunate. In that regard, people are currently worried about what they are like. But, in general, we are much more worried about what our fellow citizens are like, we want them to be a certain way, we want them to have certain attitudes— pro-liberty, pro-equality—because these are assumptions of our regime. We share our regime, a shared cooperative scheme, and if people don't believe in equality, they don't fit into our regime as well—same if they don't believe in liberty, and I realize these are in tension in the current liberalconservative divide right now between valuing one more than the other. But if you don't value both, you make an odd fit in America. To that degree, 37 �A Conversation with Paul Ludwig worrying about immigrants who maybe don't share those regime assumptions is legitimate. — Mostly I think we are worried about each other though. We wouldn’t worry that way if we didn't favor each other. That’s the kind of worry you have about your brother, he’s not holding up his end. “Dad, he’s not doing his part! I’m doing the mowing every week!” That's a kind of favoritism—you aren’t worried about your neighbor, you’re worried about your brother. From that, I think there is room to build and see each other as sisters and brothers, which is what Aristotle said too. It’s natural, there’s something natural here, but there’s also something artificial, especially the modern state. Within the modern state, there are tons of things that are still natural. It’s very natural to feel concerned about your fellow citizens, what they believe, what they ought to believe, how they are faring, who is persecuting them. A test case of that would be the pathetic story of someone’s job that has been outsourced, you immediately feel outraged. “You did that to an American!” I think we all feel that. I think it’s time for theorists, especially, to admit that, not just to concentrate entirely on self-interest, which is great, it motivates us, it does a lot of things. I would never think that self-interest is not a great political motivator. Civic friendship is another, and they are in some forms of tension. When people pursue their self-interest utterly, to the detriment of their fellow citizens, a price is to be paid and they lose the political support of their fellow citizens. I think cosmopolitan elites have lost a little political support recently, that’s what we call populism. Really a lot of the passions that I see as being out there, and somewhat misguided or even debased today, are civic friendship that doesn't know its name. At an earlier stage, it dared not speak its name. — Liberalism wanted to get us away from civic friendship. Classical liberals— such as John Locke, Thomas Jefferson—they lived through an era of robust civic friendship, both in theory and practice. I think the wars of 38 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 religion had already showed them that it was very dangerous, civic passions can be fanatical, especially when connected to religion, but in other ways too. Geography, maybe? We have a little bit of fanaticism about our border right now, on both sides. Those passions needed to be defused, so liberal theorists stopped talking about civic friendship for very good reasons, but we might now be ready for another corrective, moving back in the other direction slightly. ZG: Can a city without civic friendship be just? PL: We seem to be trying that experiment, don't we? “Let’s forget about civic friendship and just try to focus on justice.” As conceived as equal freedom, equal opportunity, or equal result, that would be the basis for justice. But I think the answer is “no.” Maybe it can be just without recognizing that it’s a civic friendship and without talking about it. I think liberal societies have always been civic friendships without recognizing it, without knowing it, and without calling it by its name. I certainly believe justice has undergone a manifold improvement since the liberal revolution, since Locke, Montesquieu, and give Hobbes his credit, and especially Machiavelli. That justly decried name! Without that revolution, the kinds of justice we enjoy today wouldn't be possible. — I think all through that period, civic friendship was always there, but people just slowly forgot about it as a thing and began to redescribe it as morality—therefore fitting [it] into justice itself, or even as patriotism. It just got redescribed. We may have now hit a limit on what we can do with a civic friendship that no one knows about. It’s just there, in the air, where people are breathing it without thinking about it. Maybe to move on from where we are now, we would need a more self-aware civic friendship. It seems we are pretty unlikely to associate it with religion again. I think maybe we’ve made that distinction. I hope religion stays private. I’m religious myself, but my hope is that it will remain a private issue and not 39 �A Conversation with Paul Ludwig become a political issue. Civic friendship could be just political, and not have to have that fatal connection, which is why I think it faded in modern theory to begin with. But I’m not sure if I’ve given you a strict “yes” or “no.” ZG: I think that was rather sufficient. Congratulations on the book, do you have a release date? PL: Thank you, about a year from now. Hopefully it’s all blown over by then, and it will be dated before it comes out. But somehow I doubt it. ZG: I’d like to ask you a question that we’ve been asking other tutors. What makes a great book? PL: Oof! ZG: I know, that’s a big question. PL: I think we’re so spoiled here with not having to set curricula the way all academics in all other departments are constantly battling about what makes a book worth reading, battling against other competing visions. We tutors have a lot of agreement because we are quite conservative of the canon. Though you guys may not realize it, tutors do deliberate endlessly about the Program. We are worried there might be better stuff out there, that we aren’t using or reading, or some stuff might have lost its zing or not be appealing to people. Since we have so much that's great, we want to make sure the things we are reading makes that connection for students. I think a great book often has a surface that will grip you. There’s also a certain authority it carries. For whatever reason, you usually know that other people think it's a great book, and therefore it has a claim on your attention. But each tutor definitely thinks he knows some books are great that other tutors don’t realize are great. ZG: What would those be for you? 40 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 PL: My favorite books are the comedies of Aristophanes, of which some are on the Program—The Frogs and The Clouds. People just don't know about a play like The Acharnians, that even most of my colleagues haven’t read. Each one of these plays displays something about Athenian democracy. The Assembly of Women—more people know about it. The Acharnians are mentioned by Thucydides, they were a faction—pro-war, and opposed to peace because their land was destroyed first when the Spartans invaded. The Spartan King Archidamus would destroy some crops when the Athenians retreated within the walls, but leave others undestroyed purely to create factions. It’s all there in Thucydides but in a nutshell, and then you see it played out dramatically in Aristophanes. It’s just marvelous. All of his plays are like that. The Knights is an oligarchic revolution, the knights being a higher class than the heavy armed [soldiers] or rowers. The highest of the three orders. They of course need a demagogue. It’s very relevant to today’s populism, where elites make compromises by using the demagogue to get their own way. — Leo Strauss has a wonderful lesser-known book—but very long and involved—of studies called Socrates and Aristophanes. Ostensibly to find out more about Socrates by reading Aristophanes’ take in The Clouds: partly fictionalized, but probably some type of trick mirror that's supposed to exaggerate features that are truly there. In order to understand The Clouds that well, with his usual thoroughness, Strauss reads every extant play with his wonderful political eye. Just reading that book in tandem with the plays is a political education of the highest order that I’ve ever come across. You can’t really understand what’s in Aristotle if you don't have that kind of cultural background, that kind of give and take, the street speech that's present throughout Aristophanes. I think a great book has to speak to us at our most profound levels. It has to tell us about something we really want, or [that] we come to learn through the book itself that is something we were really wanting all this time without realizing it. It has got that odd 41 �A Conversation with Paul Ludwig surface-to-core dialectic where there’s something superficially attractive about it beyond any cultural authority that it might have. But as you get deeper into it, there are these amazing turnarounds that happen. You think you’re going down a path, and it’s like, “Oh my gosh! That was at the end of this path, and I feel like I’m back at the beginning.” ZG: Is there anything you would like to see added or subtracted from the curriculum? PL: I obviously think it’s very good. I feel like the Math & Natural Science segment is the weakest, and I would probably subtract the social science at the end of it—the Freud and Jung. My own feeling, and I’m not sure I share this with a lot of tutors, is that psychologists have moved beyond Freud. There were intentionally fraudulent aspects of his work. He wanted a moneymaker and he found one. Some of those case studies, though they have incredible intrinsic interest (he knew how to interest me)—I think they weren’t well documented. I think he made some stuff up. I don't think there’s any reason to think that social science is truly related to math and natural science. If you really want to have a math and natural science segment, then you have to leave social science out, because to the extent it’s mathematized, it’s no longer true of politics, and to the extent it’s social, it can’t be scientific. Nature does play a role in politics—I guess I, more than others, am saying that when I say civic friendship is natural. There’s a big difference because you can’t be empirical in the same way about social matters. It would be nice to have a separate segment, but then it just becomes our Politics & Society segment. I would add more math and natural science, and create the space for it by taking out Freud and whatever else we do at the end. ZG: Do you think we should introduce more American authors into the Program? That’s one thing I’ve noticed that's rather lacking. You don't see many American thinkers in the Program, it’s very German influenced. 42 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 PL: Yeah, I think that's fair. Graduate students—but especially undergraduates—do go through this very long American saga, which isn’t quite the right word for it. But to truly call these “great books”—a collection of Lincoln speeches or the Supreme Court cases—they aren’t great books. We read them because of who we are. It's a little bit more of the American identity. It's a concession, I think, to the kinds of things that departmental academia has made vast concessions to. They’re way beyond an American identity, they want to read about a smaller identity, conceding that students should read more black authors because they have been kept down all these years, or more female authors. So, in a way, the Program concedes we have an American identity, and today we have to try to interest more and more people from all of the world in it, since we are getting a much more international student body than ever. It's a concession and a tension—you have to think: to what extent are these great books or just our great books. — There have been recent ideas bandied about, like having a whole American segment of both literature and politics for the Graduate Institute. It would be like the History segment: an option not everyone took. I might be in favor of something like that if it stayed optional. Everyone has to take their own path. Like you and I, who grew up in middle America, an American path to greatness is a true path to greatness. If I can come through the Lincoln–Douglas debates to understand something about greatness of soul, I’ll recognize it better when I come to Aristotle. We can bypass the Germans entirely. It's a little bit weirder to ask a Korean student to move through that, or get interested in American Civil War issues. That Korean student might say, “I’ve never discriminated against anyone on the basis of race anyway. The Japanese discriminate against me, but I like them,” or something like that. “Why should I have to go through it? Let me read Hegel so I can go to the fuller stuff directly.” There is a tension here, I’m not sure if I have any great answers. I wouldn’t change the Program just to add a bunch of Americans, by switching out Kant or something. 43 �Adam Hurwitz, Cosmic Petri Dish #1, 2018, Black ink and 24k gold leaf on heavyweight cotton paper. Color inversion with Adobe Illustrator. 44 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 The Alumni Association of St. John’s College funds a prize for a distinguished graduate preceptorial paper to be awarded at spring commencement. A prize committee, composed of tutors, will consider papers submitted by tutors of preceptorials in the previous spring, summer, and fall terms for this award. Award-winning essays are kept in the Greenfield Library. “Home,” by Joseph M. Keegin (AGI’18), is the 2017 award-winning essay. Home Joseph M. Keegin At the beginning of Virgil’s Aeneid, we find the surviving remnants of Troy floating across the Mediterranean in a mere handful of vessels after suffering defeat at the hands of the allied Achaean army. Waves toss the Trojan ships like a petulant child having a temper tantrum. The goddess Juno, angry about a prophecy foretelling the destruction of her beloved city of Carthage at the hands of the Trojans, petitions Aeolus to loose violent winds upon the already-tattered fleet. He complies. Violent gusts batter the Trojan galleys, breaking several against rocks jutting up from the sea floor. The sea-god Neptune notices what is happening in his domain and rages at the other gods encroaching upon his sovereignty: he dispatches the winds back to their mountain home, rebuking Juno and Aeolus for their impetuousness. The winds calm, the seas still, and the Trojan exiles drift ashore near Carthage. They sprawl out in exhaustion on the beachhead, run an inventory of their remaining equipment and rations, and start fires for their first meal on land since being forced from their home. Aeneas goes on the hunt, killing seven huge bucks: one for each vessel destroyed in Aeolus’ storm. The Trojans—“a remnant left by Greeks, harassed by all 45 �Joseph M. Keegin / Home disasters known on land and sea, in need of everything”—sorrow at their condition.1 However, there is hope. Aeneas, sensing the dejection gnawing at his men, makes a rousing speech: “You have neared the rage of Scylla,” he reminds them, “and her caves’ resounding rocks; and you have known the Cyclops’ crags; call back your courage, send away your grieving fear.”2 Then he reveals a second prophecy concerning the future of the Trojan people: “Through many crises and calamities we make for Latium, where fates have promised a peaceful settlement. It is decreed that there the realm of Troy will rise again.”3 Though driven from their homeland, the Trojans are fated for a new home. A new home is a strange idea. For us modern, twenty-first-century Americans, “home” is often merely a euphemism for “where you happen to live”: it is not uncommon to see billboards along highways advertising “New Luxury Estate Homes,” “1 & 2 Bedroom Apartment Homes,” “New Homes For Sale.” But for most of human history, home has been something familiar, old, and beloved—it precedes us, produces us, and remains a permanent part of the background of our lives even if we leave it for somewhere new. “You can take a boy out of the country,” they say— you know the rest of the story. Like Ithaca for Odysseus, home awaits your return, because one belongs to one’s home as much as one’s home belongs to oneself. Which is to say, home is as much a place—a fixed, bounded geographical zone with specific, identifiable qualities and details—as the stories, feelings, things, and—perhaps most importantly—people associated with it. Home is the place where you exist as a midpoint between a succession of generations into the past and a procession of generations into the future. “There’s no place like home” may be a cliché, but the saying 1 Virgil, Aeneid, Book I, lines 841-843. All citations refer to Allen Mandelbaum’s translation, published 1961 by Bantam Classics. 2 I.279-282. 3 I.284-286. 46 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 is common for good reason: home is a place and no two places are identical. No two homes are alike—maybe not even for the people who share them. What happens, then, when one’s home disappears? Not mentally, mind you: not as if the place that was once considered “home” is no longer thought of in those terms. What happens when home is destroyed? Where do you go when homecoming is impossible? Unlike many peoples whose names have been wiped off of the map and out of the register of human memory for all time, the Trojans are not simply homeless: they have a great destiny, foretold in prophecy. The destruction of their city provides them an opportunity. They are bound for a new home—not for an alreadyestablished, foreign city into which they will assimilate, but for a new place entirely. They will make a new home: Rome, a city fated to blossom into an empire. Aeneas will “establish a way of life and walls for his own people,” Jupiter reveals to Venus. And as for the following generations of Romans, the father of the gods will “give them empire without end.”4 This essay will explore home: what it is, how one comes into being, and what happens when home and world become identical. Troy and Beyond Troy was one of the richest and most beautiful cities in the world. The beautiful face of Helen was not the only thing that brought the Greeks to Trojan shores: the possibilities of plunder to be won from Priam’s city and well-wrought armor to be stripped from the bodies of dead Trojan soldiers were not overlooked. Even before Helen’s name is mentioned in the Iliad, Apollo’s priest Chryses relays to Agamemnon and Menelaus that “the gods grant who have their homes on Olympos / Priam's city to be plundered and a fair homecoming thereafter”—treasure was always part of the deal.5 4 5 I.369, 390. Homer, Iliad, trans. Richmond Lattimore, I.18-19. 47 �Joseph M. Keegin / Home Aeneas and the Trojans, even, did their best to rescue as much wealth from their city as they can: after landing in Carthage they draw from this collection to thank Dido for her hospitality. All the more horrible, then, to see it burned and pillaged. But along with some of the city’s riches, the surviving Trojans also escape with the city’s “household gods.” The night after leading the infamous wooden horse inside the city walls, Aeneas is approached in a dream by Hector: the dead warrior reveals the treachery of the Greeks to our sleeping hero, urging him to wake and flee the flames of his burning home and entrusting to him Troy’s “holy things and household gods.” “Take them away as comrades of your fortunes,” he urges, “seek out for them the great walls that at last, once you have crossed the sea, you will establish.”6 Aeneas wakes, arms himself for battle, and charges into the streets to make vengeance. There he meets Panthus, son of Apollo’s priest, desperately leading his grandson to safety while “in his hand he carries the holy vessels and defeated gods.”7 But the existence of these peculiar deities is also mentioned in the first stanza of the poem: once he founds Rome, Aeneas will have “carried in his gods to Latium.”8 And after landing at Carthage, as if to clarify just what “carry” means in this context, Aeneas announces to his disguised mother Venus: [...] I am pious Aeneas, and I carry in my ships my household gods together with me, rescued from Argive enemies; my fame is known beyond the sky.9 6 Virgil, Aeneid, II.400-404. II.437-438. 8 I.10. 9 I.534-537. 7 48 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Unfortunately, the poem does not provide any direct description of what these “household gods” are. We learn about them only by way of what happens to them—in their being held, carried, transported across the ocean in the galleys of ships. We learn that Juno is horrified by their fated arrival in Italy. While leaving Troy, Aeneas—hands soiled with Grecian blood— begs his father to carry them. And much later, after landing on Italian shores, we see Aeneas make a tribute to the household gods of his friend and ally Evander. Every home has its gods, it seems: homes are not just where you and your family live, but also where your gods reside. And unlike the gods of Olympus, the gods of one’s home are fragile, transportable, and require a great deal of care. It is unclear what kind of role they play in the lives of mortals: we do not see any children of household gods, they never take human form, they do not intervene in human affairs. Rather, they are quiet elements of city life that seem to grant a sense of the sacred to affairs both domestic (Panthus and Evander seem to have their own household gods) and political (Aeneas carries the gods of Troy). When home is the home of your family and your gods, it could never just be a house—which is why none of the places the Trojans stop on their way to Italy could have been their new home. Many of the places are selfevidently unfit for consideration as the location of a new Troy: Thrace is a poisoned place, the site of an ancient crime; Buthrotum is a sad and hollow replica of the once-great Troy, now shot through with sorrow and anguish. Others, however, are less clear. When the Trojans found the city of Pergamum on the island of Crete, it seems a fitting enough locale for longterm habitation—that is, until a plague befalls the island. Aeneas, sleeping in bed one evening, has a vision of his household gods standing over him: they speak to him, reminding him of the promise of Italy, Rome, and the eventual empire over which his descendants will rule.10 Clearly, the gods 10 This is the only occasion in the Aeneid in which the household gods are personified and take on an active role. 49 �Joseph M. Keegin / Home are not happy in Crete. Aeneas orders the ships loaded and the sails raised, though a small group of Trojans stay behind. By the time they arrive in the comparatively hospitable Actium, it seems they have internalized the lesson taught at Crete: the Trojans spend a year there without founding a city, experience no hardship beyond the coldness of winter, and raise their sails for Buthrotum. What ruled out Carthage, however, is initially much more opaque. Though initially met with resistance and suspicion, the Trojans are welcomed with open arms by Dido and the Tyrians. Their fame has been preserved in a series of murals—whether painted or etched is unclear—at a shrine to Juno in the heart of the city, depicting both the heroic deeds and the suffering of Trojan warriors in their battle against the Greek invaders. Carthage has built a monument to Trojan courage. And with the heroes themselves suddenly landed upon the shores of their domain, the Tyrians are happy to offer them a home. “[Should] you want to settle in this kingdom on equal terms with me,” Dido promises them, “then all the city I am building now is yours. Draw up your ships. I shall allow no difference between the Tyrian and the Trojan.”11 So why did this offer not last? The simplest answer is that the gods would not allow it. Indeed, when Hermes approaches Aeneas to remind him of the prophecy, “he sees Aeneas founding fortresses and fashioning new houses.”12 Assimilation seems to be underway. It is only once the god reminds Aeneas of the promise made to his son that the Trojan leader’s mind changes. To remain in Carthage would mean to rob Ascanius of the glory for which he is fated. Carthage would provide a happy home for Aeneas and his people—but it could never allow for the glorification of Aeneas’ true heir. 11 12 50 I.805-809. Emphasis mine. IV.347-348. �Colloquy / Spring 2019 People in a place with their gods and their families: this is the basic recipe for a home. But if a people cannot simply assimilate with another to have a home, how do they make a new one? A New Troy When Jupiter reveals the fate of Aeneas to his mother Venus, the first item in his list of events is that he “shall wage tremendous war in Italy and crush ferocious nations”—only after which he will “establish a way of life and walls for his own people.”13 Rome will happen, but not without conflict. Prophecy does not imply simplicity or ease. But what is the function of war in the founding of a new home? Is it the whim of the gods? Or might conflict be a necessary part of founding a new home? The Trojans do not simply invade Italy. When they land at Latium they are initially extended a warm welcome by King Latinus, who just recently received a prophecy that his daughter will be married off to foreigners. “For strangers come as sons-in-law,” the voice of his dead father tells him—and as if to assuage any doubt about who these strangers might be, he recites the fate of the Trojans: “their blood will raise our name above the stars; and their sons’ sons will see all things obedient at their feet, wherever the circling sun looks on both sides of Ocean.”14 Rome, then, will begin with a wedding—but the wedding is the first source of conflict. Princess Lavinia has been all but promised to Turnus, the handsome and young king of the Rutulians, but Latinus’ prophecy inspires him to break off the engagement. Juno, furious at the prospect of a Trojan marrying into the Latin royal family, sics the Fury Allecto on the Latins: Lavinia’s mother 13 I.363-369. VII.123-127. The ghost of Creüsa, Aeneas’ wife who died at Troy, had told him of this fate before he and the survivors had escaped the burning city: in Hesperia, “days of gladness lie in wait for you: a kingdom and a royal bride” (II.1056-1057). 14 51 �Joseph M. Keegin / Home Amata and Turnus are roiled into bloodlust. The Rutulian king begins to muster an army against the Trojans. Allecto also helps sow the second seed of conflict, by leading Ascanius’ hunting dogs to the beloved stag of Tyrrhus and Sylvia. Ignorant of the stag’s privileged place among the Latins, Ascanius sends an arrow into his gut, killing him. It is a grievous betrayal of custom, but a custom that the Trojans could never have assumed—and which the Latins, being “a race of Saturn, needing no laws and no restraint for righteousness,” would never have told them.15 Sylvia and Tyrrhus rouse the Latin farmers to battle: wielding whatever sharp implements they can find—“anger makes a weapon”—they march against the Trojan encampments.16 First blood is drawn: Almo, son of Tyrrhus, is struck by an arrow from an unknown bow. Latinus rebukes Turnus and the Latin mobs and refuses to open the city’s Gates of War—but Juno does it for him, making the war official. War, however, requires alliances—and while the Trojan encampments are under siege, Aeneas sails down the Italian coast making pacts with friendly kings. The most notable of these is Evander, king of the Arcadians, who entrusts his son Pallas to Aeneas’ tutelage. By the time Aeneas returns to assist the Trojan ramparts, he has assembled thirty ships with ten generals from different regions of Italy. It is a motley crew, including gods and mermen, all willing to put their lives on the line for a Trojan victory. Marriage, the breaking of custom, and alliances: these are the preconditions for the Trojan-Latin war. The marriage of Aeneas and Lavinia, if carried out, would result in the union of two peoples—but beneath the kingship of one: the Trojans. Aeneas and his people would inherit a city, a place to live while raising the walls of Rome, and the Latins will become collaborators in Rome’s greatness. And as Rome is destined to be an 15 16 52 VII.268-269. VII.670. �Colloquy / Spring 2019 empire of law—one that is destined to “teach the ways of peace to those [they] conquer, to spare defeated peoples, [and] tame the proud”—the flimsy, ambiguous rule of custom must be overcome.17 A civilized people must be able to articulate the rules, especially to guests—a tradition of inexpressible cultural habits is no way to teach the ways of peace to others. Furthermore, the alliances crafted in battle set the terms of who will possibly be victor and who the conquered: not only do the Trojans win if Aeneas leads his army to victory, but so too would (for example) the humble and rustic Arcadians. The winning party will determine the character of the peace that takes shape afterward. The conquered will be subject to the laws and customs of the conquerors. Or so it seems, but the arrangement arrived at by Jupiter and Juno complicates this outcome. “For the Ausonians [Italians] will keep their homeland’s words and ways,” Jupiter promises his wife: ‘[...]their name will stay; the body of the Teucrians will merge with the Latins, and their name will fall away. But I will add their rituals and customs to the Ausonians’, and make them all— and with one language—Latins. You will see a race arise from this that, mingled with the blood of the Ausonians, will be past men, even past gods, in piety; no other nation will pay you such honor.’18 Jupiter turns this expectation on its head: the conquerors will take the name and language of the conquered. In a set of circumstances unique to the Trojans and Latins—and brought about only through divine authorship— Trojan and Latin customs will exist peaceably alongside one another. 17 18 VI.1136-1137. XII.1107-1117. 53 �Joseph M. Keegin / Home Neither will dominate. But again, customs are not laws, and the Latins are a lawless people: one may assume that the laws established by Aeneas will be binding for this whole new race. Which is, of course, a curious and new term. From the union of these two peoples we will get one: no longer understood as members of family groups (Teucrians descended from Teucer, Dardaans descended from Dardanus, and so forth), the people will comprise a unity of plurality—a many that makes one. And this transformation of peoples into a race is a reflection of another transformation that Rome will effect: that of home into world. World Before meeting with the Latins after landing on the Italian peninsula, Aeneas visited the Sibyl. A deranged priestess of Apollo, the Sibyl was granted the ability to presage the future by writing the fates on a collection of leaves, which are then frequently scattered by the wind. But Aeneas is not here to hear the future from the Sibyl. Rather, he requires her assistance in descending to Hades to visit the soul of his dead father, who will tell him the whole story of Rome. The Sibyl agrees, but Aeneas must first complete a few tasks: so Aeneas picks the golden bough, performs the required sacrifice for Persephone, and the two climb into the bowels of hell. When they reach Anchises in the Fields of Gladness, he is positively glowing: he stands in the middle of a grassy meadow, telling the story of his bloodline to the souls of his descendants. Aeneas tries to embrace him, but his arms pass through his body like a beam of light through a window. They share tears. Anchises then takes Aeneas on a tour of the blessed part of the underworld, the place where great souls live out their afterlives in joy and gaiety while waiting for the moment of their resurrection—when, a thousand years after death, they will drink from the river of forgetting and return to a bodily form on earth. Then he reveals to him the destiny of Rome: the events that will shape its legacy, the greatness it will win, and the men who will lead it there. “Rome will make her boundaries as broad as 54 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 earth itself,” Anchises says, “will make her spirit the equal of Olympus, and enclose her seven hills within a single wall, rejoicing in her race of men.”19 Rome, it seems, will be founded as a great city by great men—but then will become something different. Rome will eventually become the whole world. If what was said earlier about home has any validity—that home is a place— then this poses a strange problem. Just as home is a place, world is a space. Rather than being defined by boundaries, specificity, and uniqueness, the world is that space which transcends all places and inside of which all place loses its place-ness. A place is defined explicitly in opposition to the world: in full knowledge of the vastness of everything and the infinite array of possibilities, I settle myself in a small corner of existence whose contours become as familiar as the backs of my hands. I always live in a place, though I may have knowledge of the world: I can study astronomy, oceanography, and the histories of distant empires without ever leaving my home. Somehow, however, Rome will collapse these category distinctions: it will be an empire that spans the whole world, while remaining the home of a people in the form of a race. How does a transformation of this kind take place? It seems to involve two factors: people and history. World-as-home-forrace carries with it a different set of categories than place-as-home-forpeople: as seen before, the category “race” transcends of particular family groupings to constitute a higher-order unification of people. The Trojans and Latins will retain their separate customs and rituals, but will become one inasmuch as they are members of the same race—only this arrangement of people is capable of inhabiting a world-sized home. No longer will separate peoples inhabit far-flung cities ruled by hereditary kings: the boundaries of Rome and those of the world will become 19 VI.1034-1038. 55 �Joseph M. Keegin / Home identical, uniting all people under one banner. The whole world will have an order, then—and he who rules Rome rules it all. It is no accident that Anchises’ prophecy takes place over the course of many generations. The founding of Rome will not be like the creation of the heavens and earth (or even, perhaps, like the transformation of the Trojan and Latin peoples into a single race): it will not go from being a city to encompassing the entire earth in a single instant. Rather, though its destiny is already written, the transformation must play out in time. Successive generations will make their contributions to this transformation: specific human beings—people like Tullus, Numa, Romulus, Mummius, and Caesar—will be the agents of the change. Fate does not preclude active human participation in its execution. Gods may author what will happen, but humans must effect the execution. And inasmuch as human beings are beings in time, their actions are events in time—and the memory, or story, of these events constitutes history. At the end of the Aeneid, however, we do not see the founding of Rome. The bleeding body of Turnus does not provide us with a vision of Roman greatness that we expect after reading numerous instances of prophecy: it is hard to see how the merciless, vengeful slaughter of the Rutulian king is a beginning-point for the eventual Roman mission of teaching peace to the conquered, sparing the defeated, and taming the proud. Perhaps the execution of prophecy often plays out like the opening of the poem, where a band of confused refugees float around the Mediterranean, unsure of where they may land. But though we all long for a home, perhaps only a few are called to inhabit their own—and even fewer to see theirs to greatness. 56 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Adam Hurwitz, Moon Graph #3: Star Birds, 2018, Black ink and 24k golf leaf on heavyweight cotton paper. 57 �Adam Hurwitz, Cosmic Petri Dish #3, 2018, Black ink and 24k gold leaf on heavyweight cotton paper. Adam Hurwitz’s work combines nature with mathematics using a distinctive minimalistic and playful technique. “We are all at once large and small, connected through the depths of our skies and seas, hearts and spirits,” Hurwitz suggests. Using Micron Pigma black ink, vivid colors, and negative space, his work explores the miracles of nature, love, and music under the lens of an artist microscope. 58 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Five Poems Louis Petrich Waking I get how Love makes choice, her friends to mate: she sees and hears and touches them— directly. The man on words dependent, senselessly kept distant, wiser though than these, dispenses himself vainly, present not to please. Teach him to care— (his letters archives fill, to glory hers) and not to care— to face her sideways, lean of appetite and shoreline straddling— uncommitted. From sea come sounds to measure his up-heaving. 59 �Louis Petrich / Poetry Let’s see . . . he’ll write his Dear infrequently, applaud more circumspectly, too, hereafter, to make himself Love’s equal, sporting free, and take close by her beauties, satisfied. Yet still he wonders much the fitting thing to do with all the waked words fine that passed so nearly true between them heretofore, for light, you know, it bends through human mediums, too. Who thinks that — buy them, someone would— like new?— Give everything she treasured once before? Are women—covetous so—of their dreams, as twenty-thousand times would men try proof? If only such another he could meet, rehearsèd mettle, richly hers, he’d keep. 60 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Love Lesson #5 Unshaped the things your words once licked adorn. Now what impression must I pray be mine? Give arrows lips to drink me, salt afloat . . . . Tap wat’ry cheers, no! Nails and teeth, my shore! Your thirsty arms in rainbow stretch between the world I’m in and yours! Untangle shy spurred feet from stirrups, horse let fly on wet stones, cobbled vain-discrete for leg-gripped ride! Not wont were you to be obtuse so. What? Must, like a leaf-blower, I speak? To pile for binding pages torn by heart’s fell winds? Yes, it pains me witness cast of smiles from mine on faces tilting rapture, yours to win, as entered at the wrong cue for my scene, I ever after play the man upstaged. Straight I’d give and hazard all that I do dream for one good go with you, and summon rage if going faints, as Shylock fills with hate, yet greedy less for years than lusty spill. No, I must not think you worse than those before, to slide rings back and forth ‘twixt present mates, or tricked to swallow, urged by absent core. Goal— keep heart-strings taut to penetrate the storm— writ arrows marry minds, spite bodies torn. 61 �Louis Petrich / Poetry Love Lesson # 7 You laugh— as if it shouldn’t matter, touching friends like us, that homeward heart lets absent body make defection: “Odysseus, thigh-scarred, mends goddess beds— his love’s not home removed.” As I flip eggs in bacon grease (no doubt, for breakfast, bacon’s good), I think about the fact you would a vegetarian become, if bacon were not blameworthy. So taste of tongue does matter make of life, and earth disfigures, even stars, which though God promised counted could not be, in time we learned to spy them out, and later, how to trace the infinite diagonals, which painters ply as energy that flows through arms and legs to guide eyes pleasured home. So when you smile that others matter not to bold partakers sharing breast of deep Athena’s confidence, yet hear confess of tangent doings that deserve a place in stories 62 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 trying matters no and yes. I’ve fewer owls to feather lettered night. I drink, still thirsty, morns their skimmed-off milk. Sun-freckled skin, yours, I’d have honeyed spread, unwrinkled shores for golden clime to taste!— Instead, by hornèd moon, your hairs uncurl with cries throat-pulled from deep pale stores of time laid waste. Your waves, strong manly bent, head home towards me on what’s not matter— ethereal laws, which go by other names, when convenient, for none knows really what explains how pain or pleasure alters cause or fate removes. Dark light misshapes the matter in my brain. A shot is heard in distant space: a duel for love is fought. One man drops down, his tall proud rival stands his ground, though she won’t style him now, and probably would never have, while the dead one she’d already tak’n, though without love. So why’d it matter them, to kill? 63 �Louis Petrich / Poetry Whose rift? What difference does it make to one who hears the shot far off, for he cannot remember if the woman he adored once loved him dear— or to what purpose— married she was then— and moreover, she died before she could of life make mess— hers, his, and others, when. So many reasons things that matter, like love, should not— it’s Chekhov who’s my master here— you must recall his Sisters Three, who would’ve died to get to Moscow, home, but making love before the way, they found—too late—they had to stay. He’s always letting fire somewhere a shot, whose bullet carries passions deeply fraught toward breasts that feel the same. Oh, doctor-taught, let’s exercise in friendship all the difference it makes to keep the sunny side up smart. 64 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 No stabbing turnings, then. No breaking heart. No yoke of misery to tear apart. (How gods at us have laughed.) No . . . oh wait, please, how could I have forgot, from Chekhov, his negative craft: if cheer you take from matters not, then life, your only, lacks the means to make a plot— much tease, but no end— except the stop of memories. 65 �Louis Petrich / Poetry Looking Back So why’d you drag us, of all places, here? If Egypt was your hole, why plains gone dry? You like to sit at gate and catch the cries, afraid to enter, marking faces dear. You look for beauty worthy all the rest. And now you hasten family God knows where, and all you say is this, “Don’t look back there!” If you had only stayed for old man’s test, you might have gotten all the herds and slaves, and we’d be looking at each other kind. At least they kept to what they wanted blind. How wonderful feels fire that bad behaves— it takes by force the strangers newly lacked— what guts—to know! For that—one last look back . . . 66 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 He makes faces she answers He’s stuffed with faces, works his head with practiced hands— some wonder wrought inside must perplex out —it’s born! Cute secrets smile in smooth text voice . . . Look there: your said beloved— ‘s come under the man-babe’s morn. To satisfy the day’s new cravings, I spy on screens for words she leaves behind, of plot turns— fear and sorrow kind— Now really! Here now! His-my-love-is-yours! Present laughter take, and all else becalm. She words you—with here’s and now’s— she words you ply time’s surface balm. Night-mined words make rough return: confess me the force who crushes your heart that feeds your green eyes with pulse mine to yearn. Sharpened steal, your dreams! Facts, like gun-start, wake! 67 �Louis Petrich / Poetry We stand the faceless man, the nameless occupier whose deft hands knead and staff lifts higher the sky, that loneliness stead less inside our friend’s fair spirited mess. Yet faces, friended ours, who friend to bed, our thoughts imperil, eyes intern. Still, friends in common hold all things. What? So mated round, do heads each turn look up? So gripped between, will hearts not reprehend? Let’s make compare: in speaking, cooking sup, at doubles tennis, drinking, watching feats, the Holy One in worship, fighting free, these things partake most well in common, yes! so why not make love better— best!— by three? Try her, he can—the sweetness of life— since none can taste her long. Yet pause: no wife or children’s voice to smother in pretended kiss, there’s stuff to fear, in ear his song. The students slake him, all agree, 68 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 and lover does he claim his specialty, whose course of music much he plays in order (motion tossed) to find behind irreverent borders women ever to and fro across, obeying no ruled mind save dancing hearts come hither faces, parts moral, bowing— of course, in time. She asks me to reflect her distant light his way, belike the moon she reckons by— another picked god’s creature, spelled: her altar, phasing bright, inscribes before the fixèd mark of stars— amazing me thus far: to bastardize—as if I could—our sky! Biology— this only word she leaves behind, undeleted mine, this underlying risk of life, as brief as red, and masterful— but listen . . . logic, kindly towing: Don’t you know, dear friends, I place you top my list nearly of missed things? Oh, do not forget facts! If she’s the mind to sport for flings, 69 �Louis Petrich / Poetry and wants us kept in view’s collection, while court she pays to body’s pacts, remain you may, who feel not racked, so keep she far away from me— to make believe her days and nights turn like the moon’s in monthly circuit, that I may dream the features of her face— just like the moon’s— come round to shine in pace earth bound— one mind, to trace. In darkness lies far-sided face . . . Obsessive watching! Tell me why I waste. The skies bejewel emptiness apropos the piercing holds her wand’ring eyes patrol. Louis Petrich is a tutor at St. John’s College in Annapolis, Maryland. 70 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 In Defense of the Literature Segment Patrick Burley When St. John’s graduate students meet, there is a question that seems to be commonplace after the initial introductions are made: what segments are you going to take? St. John’s does, of course, encourage graduate students to take all five segments—and many students do—however, it is not uncommon that other students only take four. Although options each semester are limited, the Literature segment is presented as an option each fall. During my time in the Graduate Institute at St. John’s, I have heard mixed reviews regarding the Literature segment. Some students seem eager to pursue it, while others appear to be completely disconcerted by the prospect of reading Chaucer, a Shakespeare play, or English romantic poetry. Many students say that the Literature segment lacks the rigor that other segments provide and feel as if literature is mere child’s play compared to an intense text on metaphysics. Other students claim that they have read many of the materials before and are not sure what else they could gain from revisiting them, especially if their focus is philosophy or politics. I focus on the Literature Tutorial, for the Literature Seminar is looked upon with less aversion as the Greek tragedies and epics are foundational for any student of the liberal arts. I recall sitting in my undergraduate dorm room in late spring, determining if I wanted to begin my St. John’s education with the Literature segment or the Mathematics and Natural Science segment. I had just finished studying English literature so, with a strong bias, I chose the former. I had experienced many of the texts for the Tutorial before, however I had yet to experience them so intimately with other individuals who possessed such a passion for education, a dedication to the liberal arts, and a drive for 71 �Patrick Burley / In Defense of the Literature Segment truth. I was eager to take on literature within a St. John’s environment, yet I was also nervous, as I was so used to reading scholarly articles concerning literary theories and criticisms that shaped my thoughts more than I wished to admit. However, I entered McDowell with a fresh mind—a mind ready to examine the assigned literary texts for what they meant specifically to me, and not concerned with what they meant to scholars or critics. We laughed and wondered about Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales, debated about King Lear’s passions, and then we moved into lyric poetry. There was one poem that, I felt, successfully relayed an idea that encapsulated the nature of studying and experiencing literature. That poem was “Ode on a Grecian Urn” by John Keats. The poem follows the thoughts of Keats as he examines an ancient Grecian urn. In the last two lines, Keats writes, “‘Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all / Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.’” These two lines boldly describe the truth that accompanies witnessing beauty and our innate drive to understand the feelings such beauty elicits. When we witness beauty, we are engulfed with a surge of feelings—whether it be passionate love, sublimity, or darkness. These indescribable passions are, simply, truth. For Keats, truth is what you feel and, in the Literature segment, there is a litany of beautiful works that provokes such truth from within ourselves or from the text itself. When you engage with a piece of literature, whether it be a play, a novel, or a poem, you are guided through the reality created by the writer and are called to discern the principles and truth of the characters and, subsequently, of one’s self. We find truth in what we feel and our experiences call us to examine why we felt a certain way, or why we now possess vastly different emotions than the ones we had in the midst of an experience. This engagement brings one closer to the reality of one’s own condition and emotions that hold truths, which cannot be described without the use of a narrative from a novelist or a profound metaphor from a poet. 72 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 The stories that are read in the Literature segment will arrest you and insist that you consider your own narrative and story. Doing so will allow you to examine how your narrative fits in the macrocosm of reality and how it is to be defined by yourself alone. For example, in reading the Canterbury Tales, one is called to examine the relationship between the tale and the teller of the tale. Doing so draws one to contemplate one’s own narrative and perception of self, and how this perception of self is effectively or ineffectively portrayed to the external world as we wish it to be. Such an exercise is integral for understanding how you present yourself to others, whether that be how you act, speak, or treat others. The urn that Keats is describing and the variety of characters and their narratives in the Canterbury Tales reflect this idea and relate to the reader the way art or poetry, which has been immortalized, can remind us of our own mortality. This creates a paradoxical dilemma—for art reflects our uniform, perennial passions and truths, while also reminding us of our finite nature and how we are to use such truths in an effective fashion. I have ventured to briskly examine Keats’s poem and this major theme from Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales in order to express the illuminating doors literature can open to folks in the program who are considering skipping the segment—for literature provides just as much perplexity and wisdom as the other segments. Politics, math, science, and history are all very noble and essential, but literature provides vehicles for connection to our most intimate passions and truths. These connections bring us closer to a deeper understanding of our experience as beings with a faculty for emotion. Therefore, we should engage with the beauty found in literature, for there is truth to be sought in the passions that accompany beauty. Mr. Burley (AGI'20) is a student in his second-semester at the Graduate Institute. He is a recent graduate of Warren Wilson College with a bachelor's degree in English. He currently works in the Greenfield Library and serves as Treasurer on the Graduate Council. 73 �Brandon Wasicsko 74 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Students at the Graduate Institute who elect to write a Master’s Essay undergo an oral examination upon completion of their essay. Each examination begins with the student reading a précis of their work. Colloquy asked those students who underwent their examinations in the spring semester of 2019 to submit a copy of their précis, and received the following three pieces. On Education: A Reading of Hegel’s Phenomenology of Spirit Sean Foley As Johnnies, our common experience is enmeshed in an educational institution. If you are anything like me, most of your life has centered around institutions that claim membership to that same category, but you never inquired seriously after what an education is or ought to be. I, for one, relied on intuitions and normative influences. During my time in the Graduate Institute, I began to feel uneasy about my lack of reflection, especially in light of my career as a teacher. Therefore, in my Master’s Essay, I endeavored to form a clearer and more rigorous conception of what it was I had devoted my life to, and what it was I did at St. John’s for four glorious summers. In what follows, I will sketch the arc of my essay, which is on record in the Greenfield Library. I begin said essay by delineating two general models of education: the type offered by a research university, like the one I attended as an undergraduate, and the type Plato’s Socrates seems to advocate. The former I call acquisition, the latter calling-into-question. At research universities, you acquire a body of knowledge. Socrates, on the other hand, often calls into question what his interlocutor posits as the truth. Upon examining these two models of education, I identified three ways in which they are fundamentally opposed: First, acquisition is positive, while callinginto-question is negative; second, acquisition is for the sake of society, 75 �Three Précis while calling-into-question is for the sake of the individual; and third, for acquisition truth is in an alien object, while for calling-into-question truth belongs to the thinking subject. I then propose that Hegel’s Phenomenology of Spirit can show us how to reconcile these seemingly opposed models of education. Furthermore, I propose that this is not a one-way street, and reading the Phenomenology as a book that is at its deepest level about education can help us understand Hegel’s project. The Phenomenology presents us with a drama of education; it shows us what an education looks like. It also presents us with a theory of education; the theory functions as the organizing principle behind the drama—giving it a form—but it also comes to the foreground as Hegel explains what we see in the drama. Hegel’s theory is that education is neither acquisition nor calling-intoquestion, but formation. This formation happens through our lived experience, which challenges our conception of the truth and therefore fundamentally changes our way of knowing the world. When our way of knowing is proved inadequate, we gain perspective on ourselves through reflection. Formation therefore entails self-relation, and, specifically, selfalienation—experiencing oneself as an other. Education is complete when life no longer leads to our self-alienation. This means the telos of education is to recognize in the world the full expression of our innermost selves. One side of the problem is to understand what that innermost self is. By means of the drama and theory of education presented to us in the Phenomenology, Hegel intends to shed light on this side of the issue: he intends to lead us to know ourselves as what he calls Spirit. The Phenomenology is the description of the historical coming-to-be of Spirit, and is also intended to help effect the full actualization of Spirit by giving the reader theoretical insight into her own formative experience. The other side of the educational problem is that the world—which includes other 76 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 selves—must confirm our self-concept. Education therefore is a cultural activity, the completion of which requires a cultural reorientation. Standing in the way of this ultimate end of education is what Hegel calls edification. Edification makes us feel more at home in our current, spiritually destitute self-conception and spiritually defunct world, but is a mere palliative to the feeling of alienation that exhorts us to identify with Spirit and engage in the reorientation of culture. Education, by contrast, is truly therapeutic, but requires great cognitive labor so that we can hold onto the lessons of experience. Not only that, but it requires sacrifice. Identifying oneself as Spirit means that one must, like Christ, knowingly relinquish one’s current self so as to be reborn. Hegel makes this self-sacrifice more palatable by showing that one is not obliterated in the process, but purified. What is true in the lower self-concept is preserved in the higher. Any educational project that does not demonstrate this preservation will not prevail against edifiers. This is where history’s first self-conscious and culture-wide educational project, the Enlightenment, went astray. The showdown between faith and reason in the Enlightenment occurred because Enlightenment took umbrage with the mysterious and seemingly superstitious elements of religion. Enlightenment accounted for Faith in terms of its own profane paradigm, and in so doing was blind to what was true in Faith. Enlightenment did not seek to raise up or cultivate its pupils into maturity, but to destroy their faithfulness as if it were a disease. The success of Enlightenment’s hostilities leads to the spiritual destitution that leaves us prone to edifiers. But the legitimate fruit of the Enlightenment’s myopic and misguided educational project, Hegel tells us, is the Reign of Terror. Educators in the Enlightenment tradition might think of themselves as the purveyors of insight into the absolute truth, and set up a system of education that leads to the acquisition of that insight—which insight is, that truth is a matter of method rather than content. However, Enlightenment is really an unbridled calling-into-question that is hostile to life. It privileges the individual over the social situation in which she finds 77 �Three Précis herself, but simultaneously conceives of the individual in such an abstract way, that those who subscribe to its ideology become hostile to anything and everything actual and positive. This is why the revolution devoured its own children. Hegel’s characterization of Enlightenment advises both urgency and caution in our quest to reconcile acquisition and calling-into-question. The apparent reconciliation offered by Enlightenment—that is, calling-intoquestion elevated to the level of knowledge—is both unsatisfying and dangerous. And yet, this is the very substance of the knowledge tradition enshrined in departmental disciplines at research universities: the truth of research is ultimately grounded in its methodology. The heart of Hegelian education is, by contrast, its therapeutic effect—the subject’s complete reconciliation to the world. An education that leaves us unsatisfied is hardly consummate. I close the essay with reflections on what a non-Hegelian could learn about education from reading Hegel. In my understanding, this is especially pertinent because we cannot take part in the cultural project Hegel had in mind; even if we subscribe to the fundamentals of Hegel’s System, we, as non-Germans, cannot execute his educational plan. I therefore focus my energies on discussing the way in which careful and principled study of Great Books can effect a radical transformation of the reader’s way of knowing, thereby mirroring a fundamental feature of Hegelian education, and offering some pedagogical advantages of close reading and attention to particulars—which distinguishes the type of reading we do at St. John’s from the type of reading Hegel espouses—given our cultural and technological situation. I believe this examination helps clarify and justify a central activity we all take up at the College. Yet, I leave off there, and another pressing question about St. John’s remains untouched: what is the role of conversation in our education? I have some thoughts, but I will save them for a tête-à-tête. 78 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Hope in Paradise Lost Samuel Peregrin In choosing my essay topic, I knew I wanted to try a text that I had no previous experience with and that I wanted something both poetic and of a certain scale, also I wanted the original to have been written in English. Suffice to say this led me to Paradise Lost. In my first reading of it, not knowing what I wanted to explore, I was struck by the comparison made between Eve and Pandora. And I was particularly taken by a part of the Pandora story that was left out by Milton, that hope was left stuck inside her jar of suffering. It is here that I must apologize to the committee for having thrust upon them the Hesiod reading,1 but it felt dishonest to exclude the seed of my thoughts. From this point on I began to wonder what opinion Paradise Lost had concerning the nature of hope. I never found it to be strictly or explicitly defined in the way other virtues or passions were, and began to doubt whether or not there was some concept working behind the many mentions of hope at all, or if it was nothing other than colloquial and semantic. I began to find that hope was as much defined by its opposites, auxiliary powers, and perversions as any of its own attributes, but perhaps this should not have been so surprising. From here I did find some ways of understanding hope as a virtue. Firstly, it became obvious that hope was connected to suffering wherever it was presented. That seems a part of how I would define it now: a comfort felt presently to alleviate a present pain, found by looking to the future. And yet, it has its restrictions. So secondly, it must abide by proper reason lest it fall into vanity. This then leads to its two big determinants, faith and love. For, in order to be a hope 1 Hesiod, Works and Days, lines 58-128. 79 �Three Précis more than secular, and then purportedly fulfilling to a person, it must seek confirmation with the will of God. Thirdly then, we become witness to the negations of hope referenced in the poem; ambition and despair, these perversions of hope, abound. This then can tell us hope is not impatient, unbounded attempts to grasp power, nor is it a complete reservation to fate. Rather it is but a piece, one of passive fortitude, in the harmony of virtues needed to achieve a life of righteous obedience. But the fact that hope appears most often in its diminished state makes me wonder whether there is a great danger hope may yet pose. That when divorced from its associates, love and faith, it is empty; to keep hope within these boundaries is no small challenge. So perhaps this is why there is no exposition of hope for us in the poem, because it is simply too easy to fall into vain expectations. Although, a life without any reparation to hope would be one incapable of surmounting the daily sufferings cast about us. I must thank Mr. Haflidson, my essay would not have come to fruition without his counsel and encouragement. Also, thank you to the committee members, and all those in attendance, for your time and interest in this difficult topic. I do hope we all gain from, or at least enjoy this discussion as it begins. 80 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 The Flaying of Marsyas Maxwell Anthony I would not like to have my précis published. Anyone who wants to know about my Master’s Essay is welcome to review the copy entrusted to the Greenfield Library’s care. However, I would like to use this opportunity to expand on a topic inadequately addressed in my essay—the contest of Marsyas and Apollo. In the Euthydemus, a passionate young man, Ctesippus, says that two sophist brothers, Dionysodorus and Euthydemus, are welcome to skin him, so long as they turn his hide into virtue, not a wineskin like Marsyas’ was made into. Marsyas, a satyr, challenged the god Apollo to a musical contest. Whoever won could do whatever he liked to the loser. Marsyas played the aulos and Apollo played the lyre. Stories differ as to how the contest proceeded and was judged, but the consensus is that Apollo won and flayed Marsyas. I have a general suspicion that something is important about the aulos, a double reed instrument, and the lyre, a harp with two arms united by a crossbar and chords, in respect of being images of duality. The music of the aulos differs from the music of the lyre in that the aulos is a wind instrument, so playing it prevents the player from speaking. Also, it can be tuned only insofar as it is well made, whereas each chord of the lyre might be tuned to precision. Playing the aulos leads to a certain wanton indulgence—the breathing associated with it recalls sexual panting. Something about the aulos is more passionate and something about the lyre is more rational. Calling the aulos the most “many stringed” (πολυχορδότατον) of instruments Socrates and Glaucon refuse it admission to their city.1 1 Plato, Republic, 3.399d. 81 �Three Précis A general suspicion I have been entertaining is that the aulos connotes the principle of otherness—the wild indeterminate principle of multiplicity. I associate this principle with imprecise multiplicity, the sort of slurred and passionate windy music of the aulos—whereas I tend to associate the lyre with precision and exact multiplicity—the sort of otherness when one thing is a clear image of another. Given the constraints of my essay I did not get to explore this topic but am comfortable voicing my suspicion that Plato associates the aulos with the principle of otherness and the lyre with being; one might call the former the indeterminate dyad and the latter the eidetic two. The aulos encourages dancing and passionate movements opposed to speaking; perhaps for this reason the flute players are sent away in the Symposium. Writing the essay, I was given to the view that such dancing and immoderation would be alien to the god Apollo. This god, I thought, would be possessed of such cold bright deliberation that he could flay a hubristic satyr like Marsyas with clinical charm. This opinion, and over reliance of well know artistic representations of the episode, tempted me to a static view of the flaying. Recently it occurred to me that the flaying itself would be a sort of dance. The point is not simply that Marsyas was punished but that the bound satyr would writhe and contort as the punishment was administered. Even the god Apollo would be unable to prevent himself from participating in this bloody spasm. To perform the punishment Apollo would have to embrace, if not, let’s say, enwind, Marsyas’ trashing body. Thinking about this “dance” in relation to the Euthydemus, I realized that the point of the story is not simply that a hubristic satyr was punished for challenging a god, but that even a god can be corrupted in the administration of justice. A shocking but unannounced dramatic detail of the Euthydemus is that Socrates is able to remember and relate what is said and happened although the narrated events occurred in an environment of public ridicule and indignation. Socrates, unlike his interlocutors, has amazing self-control that permits him to pay extreme attention to slight 82 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 and seemingly insignificant details and motives of almost all who surround him, while understanding nuances of argument and formulating prudent responses. Socrates’ moderation is more than godlike. In respect of the musical contest the brothers Euthydemus and Dionysodorus pose, Socrates supplants Apollo. The following poem and picture are intended to accompany Mr. Anthony’s thoughts above: The Bloody Aulos Quiver body bound taut skin folds; blood whets blade and bark. These bright hands that twist the tuning pegs pluck jumping flesh. "Writhe, pant, wail, Dance, satyr, As you are flayed!" Maxwell Anthony, The Bloody Aulos, 2018, digital art. 83 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips Kelly Custer Kelly Custer: Probably a question all students in the Graduate Institute end up being asked at one point or another—as it seems appropriate to say of the Graduate Institute itself that it is the speakeasy of academia—is: how did you come to find out about the program? And along with that, what piqued your interest in it and how did you finally say, "Yes, that's for me?" Jim Phillips: I graduated from the Naval Academy in 1975 with a Bachelor of Science in electrical engineering. The books we read at St. John's are the books they told me I did not need to read to make a living. So, I never read them. But also, I've been a student of the Bible [for] the past fifty years and a teacher of it for the last thirty. As a teacher, I've tried to learn from other teachers and I discovered it seems like the teachers that understand [the Bible] best were teachers that had a good grasp of the classics. So roll the clock [back] ten years ago. My wife and I move to Annapolis to found the C.S. Lewis Institute and a couple of guys from St. John's knock on my front door when they saw the sign on it that reads “Aslan House”—Aslan from the Chronicles of Narnia. And they said, "Does this have anything to do with C.S. Lewis?" And I said, "It does." 84 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 And they said, "Can we have a study group? We study all these great books down the street, but we would like to be with other followers of Jesus to talk about the teachings of the authors of our books in light of the teachings of Jesus.” I said, "That sounds great." Now I didn't have any knowledge of the classics, but I did have a lot of knowledge of scripture. So I said, "Okay. Maybe together we can do this. — So for the last ten years I have been hosting young men, and my wife and another young lady host the women at a different time. We have, on average, twenty to thirty young people a week participating in those discussions. And the last ten years I have been surrounded by these young men with a passion for understanding the classics and understanding the questions that every author of the classics is trying to address. The questions like: how did I get here? Why am I here? There seems to be something broken in the world. There seems to be something broken in me. I understand Descartes as saying [that] there is an imperfection within me. Plato says there seems to be an instrument in me that needs to be reset. They are all wrestling with the same idea. And these young men would come into my home and read these things to me, and I would point to a spot in scripture where it says we have a fallen, rebellious nature and there is this thing within us that causes to do things we don't want to do. So we would have great discussions, but I longed to know what they knew. I longed to read what they were reading. For eight years of the last ten, I hungered to understand these classics, but I was also a full-time employee working in the IT industry. — Two years ago I retired. The minute I retired I said to my wife, "I need to get a couple of things together that I would like to focus on because I'm not ready to fully retire.” She said, "Oh I know what it is." I said, "What?" 85 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips She said, "You need to go to St. John's." And I just lit up. I said, "Yes! For ten years I have been wanting to do this.” So, I just lit up and began two years ago. And the other night was so wonderful. I'm with these young men and one of them says, "Do you think Socrates deserved the persecution in Athens that he received from the culture, especially the leadership of the culture at that time?" I was able to engage in this discussion with text. And we started laughing. [Ten] years I've been with this group, now they come and go throughout the years, but I still have some young men helping me today that were in that group six, seven years ago, and we were just laughing that, finally, I was able to participate. That's what brought me to St. John's. KC: That's really wonderful and hearing your path to St. John's, and a little of your background, it often appears that Christianity and, perhaps more specifically, many strands of American contemporary Christianity appear to have a great deal of skepticism toward any secular texts, including the classics. And I find what you just said very interesting because, if I am hearing what you said correctly, it’s in fact a sense of understanding, an understanding of the classic works and authors of Western thought that becomes and perhaps enriches the dialogue around Christianity. And allows, to an extent, for a common language to be shared where two people, who might not have read the same texts, can interact with one another in a very meaningful way. JP: To your point, there is a passage in scripture that says, "Don't be taken captive by hollow and deceptive philosophy that depends on the principles of the world and traditions of men rather than the teachings of Jesus." And a lot of people read that and throw all philosophy out. It doesn't say throw all philosophy out. It says examine it to see if it also aligns to the teachings of Jesus, and there are so many things where we see, beginning with Greek philosophers, them weighing thoughts that if you look, you will see thoughts that also Jesus himself taught about. So there's this great synergy in the thinking. And here's where the learning comes to play. The passage of scripture doesn't say to throw it out. Rather you examine the thoughts. 86 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 And I've been able to talk to a number of parents whose sons or daughters were coming to St. John's, and they were concerned that their children were going to be exposed to all this philosophical thinking [and] that all philosophy is bad. And it's just the opposite. I would always say: this is a wonderful place for young people to come and get grounded in the teachings that have shaped our civilization and culture, and they will discover that a lot of the things they have said and a lot of the things they have proposed are very much in line with the things Jesus taught. So, it's a wonderful place to begin to examine these things. KC: As I hear you saying this, I am reminded of St. Paul in the first letter to the Corinthians saying: "If anyone among you thinks to be a wise man in this age, let him become foolish in order to become wise." I find that so interesting because most of the things we read at St. John's were very much considered folly in their own age, condemned as folly, or at least were not very popular. And certainly challenging of the going wisdom in their own time, which then really makes me think that St. Paul is not being dismissive of reason, but challenging [on behalf of] a perennial wisdom. We could probably agree that many of [the] philosophers we read greatly challenge the wisdom of the day, but do so, in many cases, by raising the same questions and posing similar thoughts to previous ages going back to early Greek philosophers, which in a way, seems to bind much of their thought to perennial questions that—when neglected—become the folly of an age. JP: Yes. St. Paul was brilliant and very effective when speaking to the Greeks. He clearly knew Greek literature and he understood the Greek pantheon of gods. And he went and he sat with them, he started there, with their understanding of things, to start with things that had begun in Greece and show how they compare to the teachings of Jesus. He did amazing work in Greece. 87 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips KC: I know that you were a graduate of the Naval Academy and of your work with the C.S. Lewis Institute. Could you speak a little more to your background professionally? JP: I was raised in Louisiana and Arkansas. I went to the Naval Academy right out of high school. I then went into the Marine Corps after graduating from the Academy and flew AV-8B Harriers. I was one of the first rookies to fly a Harrier. That means the first people they took directly from flight school to fly the Harrier. It was a brand-new airplane. It hovers. Instead of a conventional take-off and landing, it can hover like a helicopter. And the Marine Corps decided they needed to demonstrate that a rookie could fly the airplane or they didn't want it. So they took four of us right out of flight school into that program. It was a very dangerous time and I lost a number of friends in the four or five years I was flying Harriers, more than ten in that period of time, and this was peacetime. So, I lost a lot of friends. That also caused me to really take a look at the questions: who am I? And why am I here? And am I doing what I was created to do? So it really made me take a close look at my life. — I left the Marine Corps after six years. Went to IBM for twenty years and a smaller company, which was like IBM, and worked there for almost twenty years. All in information technology and hiring software engineers to maintain large computer systems that the likes of AOL or FedEx use. So that's what I did all that time. But in the middle of all that I was an avid reader of books that really tried to answer the hard questions in life. Books that really tried to answer the questions of origin, meaning, morality, and hope. I call that a worldview. Everybody has a worldview and how you answer those questions defines it pretty well. I love sitting with people and exploring their worldview. It's fascinating. So that got me interested in trying to understand the philosophy that shaped Western Civilization because that shapes peoples' worldviews. 88 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 KC: At what point did you discover C.S. Lewis? Has he always been an author whose works you engaged with, or is there a particular time or work that enkindled a passion for all his writings? JP: Other than Screwtape Letters, which I probably read in high school and couldn't appreciate at that time, it really wasn't until ten years ago, when I went to a one-week summer institute at Oxford. It was hosted by an organization that had a great partnership with the C.S. Lewis Institute, and it was there that I met the president of the C.S. Lewis Institute and discovered he lived in Washington D.C. We got to know each other. He said: let's have lunch when we get back. We did. He said there are a lot of people in Annapolis that would like to take advantage of some of the offerings of the Institute, but it's too far to commute to D.C.—would you start an Institute in Annapolis? And actually, it was one of the first cities besides D.C. to do this. Today there are about 14 to 15 cities that offer the C.S. Lewis programs. So over the last ten years I've tried to catch up with my readings of C.S. Lewis. And I've come to appreciate him greatly. KC: One of my professors in undergrad was very attached to the C.S. Lewis Institute and I had the pleasure of taking a course in which we simply read works by Lewis. It was a great course and I had, and still have, great admiration for that professor. JP: I see [that] you're reading The Abolition of Man. [Right] now I am in the Politics and Society Seminar, and we've spent a great deal of time talking about Aristotle and his questions and thoughts on ethics. And he talks about natural law—that there is an eternal law and natural law. Natural law—it doesn't need to be written down, we just all know these things, it's the ways in which we interact with things. Well, Lewis called that absolute morality: that we all have a sense of a right way to behave, we know a right way to behave, and if you were to look across cultures, all the cultures that have ever been, you will notice some commonalities like: no one appreciates a coward, no one thinks it's ever okay to abuse a child. And this 89 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips is one of my favorites: if you look at the different cultures throughout history, they might disagree as to whether you can have one wife, two wives, or more, but they all would say you can't have any woman you want. And what Lewis does: in the back of The Abolition of Man is an appendix and he lists things that he thinks are examples of absolute morality, and you could see Aristotle saying that's natural law. KC: That's really interesting that you've directed us [to] The Abolition of Man, which has been a very significant book in my life and, throughout the years, a text I continue to revisit and certainly one of the books I give out the most as a gift. I brought The Abolition of Man to read a short passage as a preface to a question I have for you with respect to the program at St. John's and your familiarity with Lewis. The passage I wanted to direct us to is very similar in spirit to what you just mentioned, and this is where Lewis introduces the Tao and the Tao as being—whether we call it natural law or first principles of morality—what one always appeals to whenever one makes a challenge or claim about morality. I always find this passage striking where Lewis writes: There never has been, and never will be, a radically new judgment of value in the history of the world. What purports to be new systems or (as they now call them) ‘ideologies,’ all consist of fragments from the Tao itself, arbitrarily wrenched from their context in the whole and then swollen to madness in their isolation, yet still owing to the Tao and to it alone such validity as they possess.1 That's just one of those passages that purely in style is profoundly and succinctly beautiful. In thinking about the passage and St. John's, I really have two questions for you. One, in many ways I do not think the texts we read purport to be new systems or ideologies in the way Lewis here describes: do you think they all in some way point to what Lewis has in mind with the Tao for their appeal? And two, has your experience in the 1 90 C.S. Lewis, The Abolition of Man (Macmillan Publishing Company, 1947), 56. �Colloquy / Spring 2019 program at all resonated with the texts you've read pointing to something like the Tao? And to add a little to that, would you say that perhaps the only way we can truly understand these texts and put them in conversation with ourselves, and one another, is to presuppose and accept such objectivity, regardless of our ability to define it or even agree upon its name? JP: Yes. Right now in the Politics and Society segment it's been all about what is the best form of commonwealth beginning with Plato's Republic. And right now I'm reading Hobbes’ Leviathan where he advocates for a strong sovereign as the best form of commonwealth, and he talks about religion and all the various forms there can be and he says something very similar to what Lewis says in that passage, that when you take away things you come down to a common set of things or principles that seem to survive in all the variations. So, religions may have started in the same place and branched out, and there may be varieties of religion, some less or more true than others. But at the end of the day, if you bring them down by reduction to the common roots of each one of them, you find a lot of similarities. I think that's exactly what Lewis is saying. KC: I find it so interesting that many of the texts within the St. John's curriculum presuppose something like the Tao from which to start, which seems paramount to even have traction in discourse. If you didn't, it would almost be as Aristotle discusses in Book IV of the Metaphysics, where if you can't agree at some point and are demanding a demonstration of something like the Tao, there's just no having a conversation. And I find that to be such a stark juxtaposition to our contemporary society. Particularly when you talk about ethics or morality, you tend to hear people wanting to say something like the truth is subjective, relative, and as long as what you do doesn't hurt anyone, it's okay. Or some other variation of a golden rule with the caveat that telling anyone else what they should or shouldn't do is at odds with the relativism lurking about. But yet, that always ends up in contradiction, as if there are no grounds for normative ethics, there are no 91 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips grounds to prescribe to anyone why they shouldn't harm other people. In the same vein, in what I would consider a secular society, there is a kind of crude scientism lingering with very positivistic tendencies that demands empirical demonstration of anything before discussing truth— JP: Just stop right there: demonstrate that last statement empirically. KC: Exactly. KC: That's all to say that I think St. John's, as an institution, ends up presupposing something like the Tao and that's part of the reason that all these marvelous conversations you are able to have with folks—even if you radically disagree—can take place. JP: I'm glad you brought that up because that is one of the most beautiful things about being at St. John's. We sit every Monday and Thursday evening together with twelve to fifteen peers. Around that table are different worldviews, different answers to the questions: how did I get here? Why am I here? What's wrong with the world? And how do I fix it? Many different worldviews. The beauty of St. John’s is civil discussion. We are able, because we are centered and agree to talk within a text, and we agree to stay within the text, we are able to discuss what the author might be saying about the questions going on in our minds. And it is lovely. — The world, our country, every talk show on TV every night, could learn from the civil discussion that's being exercised at St. John's College. I wish somebody could put lights over the campus and say, "Look. You want to return to civility—you hear that term often in our culture—come sit here and see how people so different from one another discuss these things." You just think about it. The next thing you know, after being in classes with people: you're sitting down having a beer with somebody you would never have the opportunity otherwise because of the disparity in 92 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 worldviews. And yet here you are sharing something beautiful and in common and you realize you arrived where you are because you are a rational creature and you have some rational presuppositions, and so have I. Though where we arrive may be different, we are rational creatures with rational presuppositions that are capable of arriving at some rational conclusions. Now we can have a discussion. Nobody needs to label anybody with anything derogatory. Let's have a rational discussion, because I want to understand the presuppositions you have to arrive where you are. That's where learning occurs. KC: I couldn't agree more. And it reminds me, as a first-semester student and having “Notes on Dialogue” freshly on the mind and being struck by the observations Stringfellow Barr is making: Wow! What would he think now of our contemporary climate watching the news—or whatever we might call the unceasing barrage of polarizing media that has become so increasingly hard to escape—in which people swing at one another in disagreement only to go back to their respective corners without hearing a single thing the other has said? It seems that one of the things Barr was suggesting is that the model of conversation we engage in at St. John's, while not rendering definitive answers that remove the presence of the questions we start with, raises a middle ground in conversation that allows people to understand the people they are conversing with and the texts upon which the conversation is grounded. — One question that I would really like to ask you is: have there been any texts you've read in the program that you had already read? And, if so, what was that experience like for you? JP: I read Augustine before as he is an early father of the Church. But, Descartes said, there is this imperfection in me. Why would God make me with this imperfection? He could have made me perfect? Now I go back 93 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips to Augustine—and this actually happened in the same evening during the Philosophy and Theology segment—an hour later we're reading in Augustine's Confessions, and Augustine says something like this: without imperfection in the world we would never know a virtue. What? How do you become a reformer unless there is something to reform? How can you be brave unless there is something to stand bravely against? How do you forgive unless there is something to be forgiven? And all the sudden a saying that I have heard many times came alive because of the enlightenment of new reading and that was: we certainly don't live in the most perfect world, very few people would disagree with that, but we might live in the most perfect world to prepare us for the most perfect world. And here I see Augustine and Descartes agreeing, though they are hundreds of years apart, and wrestling with the same issues and coming up with similar conclusions. KC: Yes. As someone currently in the Philosophy and Theology segment, and having just had the overlap of readings you brought up this past Thursday, those two readings together are fantastic, because in a very different way than Augustine, you see Descartes posing the question why should error be in him at all—and I think that's sometimes overlooked in the text. It is very important to Descartes’ conclusion. It is very similar to Augustine claiming he would not know virtue if it weren't for imperfection: I see Descartes saying he would not know himself, what he truly is without error. JP: Love it. KC: Are there any texts in the program that you had not read, and were perhaps skeptical or indifferent about, but after encountering the text it became something that really made an impact on you? JP: Most theists would have an aversion to reading Darwin and would discourage others from ever reading him. I read him for the first time at St. 94 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 John’s. I had previously read a lot of quotes by him, but I never read him. I loved his style. I fell in love with a man who was a great thinker. I fell in love with a man who really drew conclusions from the presuppositions and evidence he had in front of him that were rational. Darwin stated that if there was ever the discovery of an organism [and] you could not explain its existence by a number of incremental, successive, progressions; he would need to rethink his whole project. Since he said that we've seen some discoveries that challenge his conclusions. And I believe if he were still alive, he would be one of the most vocal advocates for modifying his conclusions because I found him winsome and intellectually honest. Even though I disagreed with some of his conclusions, I was in love with the man for his pursuit of truth. So to answer your question, that's the beauty of something like St. John's: you can disagree with someone's conclusions, but you come to discover that they are rational beings and really trying very hard to get answers to the same questions you have, and are providing you some insight along the way—whether you end up agreeing with their conclusions or not. KC: Is there any work or text that you did not encounter in the program that you wish you would have? JP: That's like asking me if I would like a flavor of ice cream I have never tried, it is hard to desire what you have no familiarity with. All I know is that three or four months into the program, about where you are now, I was walking to class and the thought hit me: I am going to graduate in a year and a half. And my next thought was: darn. And I thought [this is] the first time I can remember that I was pursuing a goal and not counting the days until I achieved it, but rather enjoying the days of the journey. It's just been that kind of experience. So if there are other texts that would have enriched this, I wouldn't know. I am just so grateful for the ones I have encountered. 95 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips KC: I think you really hit the nail on the head in that it's such a different experience. No one I have talked to in the program is looking toward its end—only lamenting that it should end at all. — I wanted to ask you a question given your background and your life. Given your commitments, I am very interested in your response. I'm currently reading Nietzsche's later works in preceptorial. We are reading The AntiChrist right now and throughout that work there is an overarching theme that Nietzsche takes Christianity to be dishonest. It's also very nuanced in that he seems to have a certain appreciation for Christ, but very much wants to take away anything miraculous and separate Christ the man from divinity. And I guess my question is—Nietzsche seems to see the attractiveness of Christianity to the many as rooted in the fear that this life is it. And that Christianity is driven by denying this life in hopes of another life. As someone with your worldview and background, what would your response be to that? JP: Nietzsche is another thinker that I find intellectually honest, let me just state that up front. In other words, honestly, the despair that one reads in Nietzsche is the despair one would expect if you truly believe that this life is all there is. So I find him intellectually honest. For that I respect him. But if I were sitting here with Nietzsche and he said to me: "You know, I think Christianity is something conjured up in order try to extend your life, [to] try to bring about immortality that doesn't exist"—I would ask him if it is possible that his atheism is something that he came up with in order to avoid or not face something that might exist. The question always needs to be asked both ways. Very similarly, I often get asked as a follower of Jesus, "Why, if God is a good God, is there so much pain and suffering in the world?" And after I spend some time on that, I turn the question around saying, "I'm not sure what your worldview is, but you need to answer the same question within your worldview." 96 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Because one thing we can all agree to is that there is something broken here. Different people with different worldviews will call it different names: wrong desire, misplaced affection, brokenness. We all agree that something is wrong. Now we all need to answer the question: Why? And what hope do we have to remedy the brokenness we see? So, I really respect Nietzsche. He is true to his convictions and the demeanor of his writings demonstrates it. Quite frankly, my heart goes out to him and I would have loved to have spoken with him. KC: Similar, in many respects, in addressing the brokenness in the world and the task of answering it, living within it—another thinker, one of few that Nietzsche extends praise and withholds scorn from, is Dostoevsky. Dostoevsky's characters all confront and stand at the threshold of what he calls the "crucible of doubt." That has been so important in my own life and struck me in many of the conversations I have been a part of in the Philosophy and Theology segment. It really seems you can only doubt something you take seriously, a presence that confronts you as potentially real enough to doubt. In other words, doubt is not at play for me with respect to the existence of unicorns, but it is very much at play when I am confronted by the existence of God or the life of Jesus. For you, as someone who has lived very much convicted of a worldview, is there a way in which coming to St. John's, reading authors that lay open questions of doubt—have those experiences made you question in a deeper way the reality of your beliefs? JP: Yes, because all of the authors we read at St. John's ask really good questions and provide wonderful insights. You know doubt and faith are not exclusive. And faith is not, as many people think, believing something that may not be true. If that were so, then a strong faith would be believing something you are pretty sure is not true, while a perfect faith would be believing something you're absolutely sure is not true. Faith is not that. Faith is reason informed by evidence. You have evidence that something may be true, the distance between the evidence you have and the ultimate 97 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips truth you are trying to embrace is doubt. Reason examines the doubt and [the] evidence, and says: I think the evidence outweighs the doubt, and I am going to trust my reason and its conclusion to where the evidence points—that is faith. KC: At this juncture within civilization, faith gets used as an immediate contrary to reason, contrary to evidence. A thinker that very much discusses faith is Kierkegaard. The leap of faith found in some of his pseudonymous works has gained a degree of infamy as divorcing faith and reason. But reading Kierkegaard proves a far different experience. Faith and reason are not treated as dichotomies within the leap of faith, or in many instances the leap into sin, but very much as embracing the limits and finitude of being human, living at the threshold of the crucible, the tensions of doubt and reason. Once we make the leap, grace is on the other side. Grace is very hard for us to understand, to see, to allow ourselves to experience. But part of that leap of faith is not an abandonment of reason, not an abandonment of doubt, but is very much trust. This strikes me as so profound because it is very difficult to speak of trust independent of reason, independent of there being evidence that there is something or someone that is trustworthy. Such ruminations on faith have been indispensable in my own life. Does that accord at all with your experience of faith? JP: To me, faith is reason informed by evidence. And it is where that reason, informed by evidence, points. Every one of the authors we read exercises some measure of faith. None of them are absolutely certain of their conclusions. They all offer you the presuppositions and rationality of their conclusions. I am trying to think of who it was—Hume?—who appears so skeptical about everything and tears just about everything down, but then says something at the very end perhaps allowing room for something like divine revelation. What? Why didn’t he insert this at the beginning of the work? I would have read this in an entirely different light. But no, he put that at the end because he wanted me to experience all of 98 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 the skepticism before he left room for divine revelation—and I just loved it. All of our authors—and all of us—exercise faith regarding the questions of why we are here and who we are. We have reasoned the projection of evidence and exercise faith to where it points. KC: Yes. I couldn't agree more. Speaking of pointing toward things—as I know your time, lamentably, at St. John's is coming to an end and directing you to other things—I've caught wind that there might be something pointing you toward Oxford. Could you share what the next adventure in life is for you? JP: Well, a year ago I was enjoying this program so much and so stimulated by the authors we discuss, and I said to my wife, "I can't help but to think this is pointing to something." And she immediately said, "Oxford." And, of course, she knew that I had Oxford in my heart and almost attended there right out of the Naval Academy. And when I say Oxford, I mean an Oxford type of education, which by the way, I think St. John's is. And that's in part why I came here: thinking I have an Oxford in my backyard. But anyway, my wife was really the one to say, "You should go." So I've really spent a lot of time thinking about this and received a lot of affirmation from friends and tutors. So, as I sit here right now, I have been accepted to Oxford for post-graduate work in theology starting in the fall. — I will just tell you this. There is no way I would have had this type of opportunity in my life without St. John's bridging the gap between an engineer, and then a software engineer, and one who really wants to pursue theology. There's no way I could have bridged that gap without St. John's College. I'm truly grateful to St. John's for opening this door that I have always wanted to go through, and it looks like now I will have the opportunity. 99 �A Conversation with Jim Phillips KC: That's wonderful. In wrapping up, is there anything you feel compelled or would like to say about the Graduate Institute here at St. John's that you think people should know, whether they are prospective students or current students, or anyone else in the community? JP: I have to praise the tutors. And I would like to list them, but I am sure I would forget one and that would be tragic, because every tutor I have had in these four semesters has been lovely, winsome, gifted, concerned about the classes having meaningful discussions, and concerned about me as an individual receiving from this short period of time the most I could possibly receive. And through the personal interviews, through the seminars, feedback on papers, through conversations in the hall or after class, they have been just so encouraging. I cannot say enough about the tutors I have enjoyed. I will just say this: literature was my hardest subject in high school and as an undergraduate. I left both of those experiences with a total lack of appreciation for literature. But through the Literature segment at St. John's, I love literature. Chaucer's Canterbury Tales, the great classics, the plays: I have got a whole new love and appreciation for literature. And I owe that to the tutors. 100 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Moral Intuitions in Tolstoy’s War and Peace Joseph Hiles Leo Tolstoy’s novel War and Peace combines an intimate portrait of Russian life during the French invasion of Russia with a strikingly original philosophical analysis of history. Through this wartime struggle, many of Tolstoy’s characters grow and learn how to live meaningful, moral lives. Yet how exactly one can live a moral life according to Tolstoy is never explicitly spelled out in the novel. Accordingly, this essay will be an attempt to better understand Tolstoy’s moral philosophy. The essay will use three vignettes from the novel as lenses through which a better understanding of Tolstoy’s moral philosophy can be seen. The scenes in question are: the moment when Nikolai Rostov strikes the French officer with his sword, Rastopchin’s order to kill Vereshchagin for the abandonment of Moscow, and the execution of the Russian prisoners by the French. Through analyzing these scenes, the essay will explore Tolstoy’s views about moral intuitions and their role in guiding moral actions. These intuitions, for Tolstoy, are heavily impacted by our proximity to the people our actions affect, and supersede the place of reason in evaluating the morality of an action. Strong Moral Intuitions In each of the three vignettes outlined above, the moral intuitions of the characters kick in either immediately as—or within seconds after—the action is committed, alerting them to the fact that they have violated some hard to define moral code. For example, despite years of wishing for glory in combat, at the very moment when Nikolai Rostov bravely chases down the French dragoon officer and strikes him with his sword, “all Rostov’s animation suddenly vanished...some unpleasant feeling wrung his heart. 101 �Joseph Hiles / Moral Intuitions in Tolsoy’s War and Peace Something unclear, confused, something he was unable to explain to himself, had been revealed to him” (653-654).1 What was this unpleasant, unclear feeling that was wringing Nikolai Rostov’s heart? It is likely that he feels guilty for striking the officer, despite the fact that this is the very kind of action he would have hoped for earlier in the novel. He finally gets the thing he wanted—glory—and yet it makes him feel unpleasant. Indeed, further indication of Rostov’s guilt comes after the moment of action, once he has had time to think it over. There Tolstoy writes that “Ostermann’s flattering words and the promise of a reward should therefore have been a joyful surprise for Rostov; yet the same unpleasant, unclear feeling nauseated him morally” (654). It is significant that Rostov’s feeling of guilt is just that, a feeling. From the first moment to the last, it is a feeling that wrings his heart, a feeling that he cannot understand, and a feeling of moral nausea. These feelings are not the result of a calculation or philosophical analysis of his actions, but instead spring from inside of him organically. The language of feeling and moral guilt is mirrored after Rastopchin heartlessly orders the Russian peasant mob to attack Vereshchagin, blaming him for the fall of Moscow. In the aftermath of this event, Tolstoy writes that “fresh as that memory was, Rastopchin felt that it was now deeply, bloodily engraved in his heart. He felt clearly now that the bloody trace of that memory would never heal, but that, on the contrary, the longer he lived, the more cruelly and tormentingly that terrible memory would live in his heart” (893). Like Rostov, Rastopchin feels as a result of his actions; Tolstoy uses this word twice in these two sentences. Although the word guilt is never used explicitly, the fact that the memory would live “cruelly and tormentingly” inside of him is a clear signal that he feels guilt for what he did. Much like Rostov, this guilt comes not from a calculation of precise moral reasoning, but rather from a feeling deep inside of him. 1 All parenthetical citations refer to page numbers in the following edition: Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace, trans. Richard Pevear & Larissa Volokhonsky (Vintage Books, 2011). 102 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Lastly, in describing the execution scene where French soldiers are commanded to shoot Russian political prisoners, Tolstoy writes that Pierre looked upon the “pale, frightened faces of the Frenchmen, who again were doing something by the post, pushing each other with trembling hands” (966). The Frenchmen who were carrying out the execution, and not at all in harm's way, looked frightened, their hands trembling. What then was frightening them, causing their hands to tremble? This look of terror must be an unintentional response to what they are doing, a kind of involuntary disapprobation of their own actions. Further evidence of this comes when Pierre recognized that “on the faces of the French soldiers and officers, on all without exception, he read the same fear, horror, and struggle that were in his heart...‘They’re all suffering just as I am’” (966). The executioners appear to be suffering because they are being forced to carry out an order that feels unnatural and immoral to them. Finally, this feeling of moral failing is expressed most explicitly when Tolstoy writes that the executioners “all obviously knew without question that they were criminals, who had to quickly conceal the traces of their crime” (967). The perpetrators of the execution “knew without question” that they had done wrong. Where did this knowledge come from? There is no suggestion that they needed to think hard and reflect to come to this conclusion about their own moral failing. They knew their guilt from the moment of the crime, in a kind of intuitive and unambiguous way. In all three of these cases, feelings of guilt and shame arise mere moments after the actions they follow. No mental reflection occurs to bring these emotions about. The most plausible explanation for these feelings is that Tolstoy gives these characters strong moral intuitions that instinctively recognize immorality and flare up—in the form of feelings of guilt—when those intuitions have been transgressed. One final piece of evidence corroborates this assertion: Tolstoy references the heart as the place of anguish and struggle in each of these three anecdotes. For Rostov, “some unpleasant feeling wrung his heart”; for Rastopchin, his memory of the 103 �Joseph Hiles / Moral Intuitions in Tolsoy’s War and Peace event was “now deeply, bloodily engraved in his heart”; and for the executioners, Pierre “read the same fear, horror, and struggle that were in his heart” (653, 893, 966). In literature and in life, the heart is considered to be the realm of feeling, while the head is considered to be the place of thinking. Almost no thinking occurs in the minds of these characters during their respective actions. Yet they still know “obviously...without question” that what they have done is wrong. This knowledge comes from the heart and does not require logical reasoning. While the circumstances of these situations are quite different, the responses of the characters to their own transgressions and Tolstoy’s descriptions of their resulting feelings are remarkably similar. These analogous responses suggest to the reader that Tolstoy is making a claim here not just about the characters in the story, but about all people, about how all humans would respond to striking someone with a sword or being forced to shoot a prisoner in cold blood. Further evidence that Tolstoy is making a universal claim is that these three situations involve characters of dramatically different social classes and upbringings. These feelings of moral failure, for Tolstoy, are not dependant on an education in the Classics of Western philosophy. They appear to be present both in educated upper class officials like Rastopchin and privates in the military like the French executioners. Now that the presence of strong, heartfelt moral intuitions in these characters has been identified, further investigation is necessary to show how they operate and what qualities they have. Proximity In War and Peace, the moral intuitions of the characters appear to be deeply affected by proximity to the ethically questionable act. Something changes when they are up close and personal, and can see the faces of the people they are hurting. For instance, in the episode with Nikolai Rostov, Tolstoy writes that “Rostov sought his enemy with his eyes, to see whom he had 104 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 vanquished” (653). At this moment Rostov does not yet feel guilt; he only wants to see who he has overcome. But something significant happens when he looks upon the poor soldier, who is “glancing up at Rostov from below with an expression of terror. His face, pale and mud-spattered, fairhaired, young, with a dimple on the chin and light blue eyes, was not at all for the battlefield, not an enemy’s face, but a most simple, homelike face” (653-654). This line directly precedes the line about how an “unpleasant feeling wrung his heart”—consequently the reader can infer that observing these attributes of the officer is the proximate cause of Rostov’s guilt. Rostov feels guilt once he sees that this person he has harmed is more like an innocent child than the menacing enemy he likely imagined. The reader gets further confirmation of this through Rostov’s thoughts a few days later, when he thinks: “‘they’re even more afraid than we are!’ [...]‘And what harm had he done, with his dimple and his light blue eyes? But how frightened he was! He thought I’d kill him’” (655). While again expressing surprise at the innocence of the officer with his “dimple and light blue eyes,” Rostov further observes that his enemies are “even more afraid than we are!” In this moment Rostov realizes that this particular enemy and, by extension, the whole French army are equally or even more frightened than the Russian army is. This realization could be boiled down to a simple phrase: they are just like us. Whereas before he had evidently imagined the French to be terrifying and aggressive, unlike the young and disorganized Russian forces, the recognition that they were just as afraid as the Russians obliges Rostov to see all that they have in common with the enemy: their common humanity. It is in the observation of the enemy’s face and his fear that these conclusions are reached. It is noteworthy that, by this point in the narrative, Nikolai Rostov has been in the Russian military for years, and has presumably shot at enemies many times before this event. But given his surprise when he realizes that the French troops are just like the Russian ones, it is clear that this is a new revelation for him: this shows the role proximity plays in Rostov’s moral 105 �Joseph Hiles / Moral Intuitions in Tolsoy’s War and Peace intuitions. Before he could clearly see the faces of the people he was fighting it was easier to dehumanize them and think of them as monsters. But his nearness to the dragoon officer precluded his ability to frame the situation in this way. If he had killed this officer, he could see that he would be killing a young, scared Frenchman who likely had no interest in fighting in the first place. This is not to say that Tolstoy believes it is somehow more ethically justifiable to kill people from far away with a gun or a cannon than it is to kill them up close with a saber. Proximity does not change our moral obligations. Rather, it clarifies them, cutting through our proclivity to redirect our attention to something less appalling. As a test of the morality of an action it is not enough to ask: will you feel guilt at having done something? This test is insufficient because it fails to take into account that we can trick our moral intuitions by looking away, or being far enough away in the first place that we cannot see the damage we have done. The real test of the morality of an action that Tolstoy seems to be advocating for would be the following: will you feel guilt at having done something while you stare into the eyes of the person you are doing that thing to? Henceforth, this will be called the proximity test of morality. This test, or something that closely resembles it, actually occurs in the pages of War and Peace. Before the execution scene, Pierre is questioned by the French general Davout, “a man known for his cruelty” (963). Davout contends that Pierre is a Russian spy, an accusation that, if borne out, would almost certainly lead to Pierre’s execution. Yet while Pierre is frantically attempting to exculpate himself, something remarkable happens: Davout raised his eyes and looked fixedly at Pierre. For a few seconds they looked at each other, and that gaze saved Pierre. In that gaze, beyond all the conventions of war and courts, human relations were established between these two men. In that one moment, they both vaguely felt a countless number of things and realized that they were both children of the human race, that they were brothers (964). 106 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 In this touching moment of human contact, the proximity test of morality is inadvertently thrust upon Davout. In attempting to evaluate Pierre’s guilt, Davout is forced to look him in the eyes. He is forced to recognize who exactly he will be killing if he orders his execution: a brother, a child of the human race. This is something that they both “vaguely felt” rather than precisely reasoned. Without a doubt, Davout would have treated Pierre differently if they had not been in the same room, if a human connection had not been established. But now that Davout has stared into this man’s eyes, he understands that he will feel guilt if he sentences him to death. All of this is spelled out by Tolstoy in the next line, where he writes that: At first glance, for Davout, who had only just raised his head from his list, where human deeds and life were known by numbers, Pierre was only a circumstance, and Davout could have shot him without taking a bad act on his conscience; but now he had seen him as a human being (964). When Pierre was “only a circumstance” and existed only on the pages of Davout’s list, he was as removed from Davout as the enemy soldiers Rostov shot at earlier in the novel. But once Davout makes eye contact with Pierre, and Rostov looks at the young face of the dragoon officer, the certainty of a guilty conscience compels them to have compassion. Further, by pointing out that Davout is famous for his cruelty and then showing him soften once he is face to face with Pierre, Tolstoy is undoubtedly suggesting that this is the universal human reaction to the proximity test of morality and that these instincts are present in everyone, even the most brutal of generals. The means of clarifying the morality of an action which Tolstoy appears to advocate for—the proximity test—raises interesting questions about the efficacy of another test of morality that is more typically used to decide the ethical ramifications of an action. The next section of this essay will deal with the place of reason in Tolstoy’s moral framework. 107 �Joseph Hiles / Moral Intuitions in Tolsoy’s War and Peace Reason As was noted earlier in the essay, in each of the three chosen vignettes, the morality of an action was decided not by a calculation or the application of a philosophical system—rather, characters were overcome by a feeling of guilt after they acted wrongly. Nowhere in these scenes does Tolstoy show characters—at the point of action—thinking hard about their moral obligations, or attempting to weigh the pros and cons of various actions. In other words, the evidence from the story points to a view of morality that relies entirely on moral intuitions, discrediting the place of reason in morality. The reader can infer this assertion from Tolstoy’s depictions of these scenes. If only the executioners had followed their intuitions, they would not have killed the prisoners. If only Davout had been face to face with all the people his orders harmed, he might not have been famous for his cruelty. But the force of these inferences pales in comparison to the strength of the rebuke against reason that comes after Rastopchin commits his crime of ordering a peasant mob to vent their anger over the fall of Moscow by murdering a political prisoner. Tolstoy writes that in the hours after the crime, “Rastopchin calmed down physically and, as always happens, simultaneously with physical calm, his mind also devised causes for him to be morally calm” (891). Right off the bat the reader can tell by Tolstoy’s word choice that Rastopchin is doing something dubious and problematic here. The word devise implies that he is inventing reasons to feel better that are not actually true. What are these causes to be calm that he devises? The thought that calmed Rastopchin was not new. As long as the world has existed and people have been killing each other, no one man has ever committed a crime upon his own kind without calming himself with this same thought. This thought was le bien publique, the supposed good of other people (891). 108 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Rastopchin convinces himself that his actions were justified because they were done for the “supposed good of other people.” In other words, he is using a rational consideration, something like a utilitarian calculation, to pacify himself and attenuate his guilt. By positioning himself as someone who is working for the public good, Rastopchin can absolve himself of responsibility by conceiving of his crime as an action where the ends justify the means. Continuing in this way of thinking, he even reflects: “‘I didn’t do it for myself, I had to act that way. La plèbe, le traître...le bien publique’” (893). He is instrumentalizing reason itself to feel better about what he did. Much like the list that Davout had, where “human deeds and life were known by numbers,” the application of reason in this way is a means of creating mental distance from the criminal action, to get around the proximity test of morality. Tolstoy undoubtedly views reason used in this way to be quite sinister. At this point, the reader might ask: clearly Tolstoy denounces the use of reason after a crime to justify it, but what about if reason is applied before the action has been carried out, as a way to evaluate the consequences of the act? Tolstoy responds to this question conclusively, putting the final nail in the coffin of morality by way of reason when he writes that: “for a man not gripped by passion, that good [the public good] is never known; but the man who commits the crime always knows for certain what that good consists in. And Rastopchin now knew it” (891). By saying that the public good is never known to man, except when he is in a fit of passion— in other words when he is not reasoning—Tolstoy is telling the reader that a truly rational system of morality is inaccessible. When man is abstractly reasoning he can never know what is in the interest of the public good. For Tolstoy, man does not have the capacity to arrive at moral truth through the medium of reason. 109 �Joseph Hiles / Moral Intuitions in Tolsoy’s War and Peace War The primary implication of Tolstoy’s far reaching moral analysis is that war, and especially modern war, is the worst of human evils because it takes away our only standard of discerning between right and wrong, and replaces it with the standard of obedience to authority. Almost by definition, every act of war goes against our moral intuitions. Regardless of how noble the cause we are fighting for, it will always be contrary to human nature to wound and kill our fellow man. At every turn, war systematically tricks and erodes these moral intuitions. For example, all of the long-range weapons that are used in modern combat eliminate the need to look the enemy in the eye as you attack them. The proximity test of morality never comes into play when the people you are shooting at are hundreds of feet away. At this distance, the strength of our moral intuitions is greatly reduced. At the same time, repeated contact with death and violence desensitizes combatants to the horrifying acts they are carrying out. One particular moment in the execution scene perfectly illustrates this point. While Pierre is gazing upon the frightened French executioners, all but one of them rejoins their companies. One soldier is too paralyzed with horror to carry on as normal: A young soldier with a deathly pale face, his shako pushed back, his musket lowered, went on standing across the pit in the place from which he had fired. He was reeling like a drunk man, taking a few steps forward, then back, to support his falling body. An old sergeant ran out from the ranks and, seizing the young soldier’s arm, pulled him into the company (968). “Reeling like a drunk man,” this young soldier has responded how any normal human being who is not accustomed to the violence of war would respond to being forced to execute people. The reader can infer by his 110 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 young age that this soldier is intended to represent a person uninitiated in the art of war. Yet while this young soldier is crippled by guilt and fear, the other soldiers attempt to rejoin their units as if nothing happened. The young Frenchman is saved from embarrassment and punishment by an old sergeant who runs out and pulls him back into the company. In this moment, instinctual human feelings like guilt and horror that arise out of our moral intuitions are either deliberately inhibited by the other soldiers so as to not appear weak, or they have been unwittingly attenuated over time through constant contact with violence. Either way, the process of being a soldier in war gradually degrades the effectiveness of our intuitions in clarifying and motivating ethical action. War perversely incentivizes soldiers to forget their intuitions and do as they are told. In the pages of War and Peace, Tolstoy weaves together a compelling and complex moral system that relies on the moral intuitions that he evidently sees in all human beings. These intuitions can be invaluable tools for clarifying how we ought to act. But unfortunately they can be deceived and eroded, and, as a result, precautions must be taken to preserve their effectiveness. To address this concern, Tolstoy implicitly suggests a standard of moral evaluation that hinges upon proximity to the person one’s actions will affect. In this proximity, where one must stare into the eyes of one’s adversary—and see firsthand what will be lost if lethal action is taken—right and wrong become clear through our feelings. All we must do then is act according to our heart. 111 �The Cliffs of Moher Patricia Harden What is it about the Cliffs of Moher? Where carboniferous ridges Of shale and flagstone rise A steep seven hundred feet Above the Atlantic roar Where the rhythmic flight of birds blends With the ebb and flow of the waves, As seagulls drift and dive, and shorebirds skirt The swirling sea foam bath Where century after century, Irish folk and foreigners Wander, watch, and wonder Awed by Time’s imposing sculpture Where musicians play and passersby Throw a pence to a fiddler’s case, For sad sweet tunes resonating feather light On the breeze of salt sea air It is but this, my friend: Where stone and sand and sea Command each soul’s repose— A moment to reflect on one’s immortality Safe within the harbor of eternity. 112 �Colloquy / Spring 2019 Patricia Harden Cliffs of Moher 113 �Jaime Marquez 114 �You can find more work by the artists featured in Colloquy at: Adam Hurwitz: spacewaves.me Jaime Marquez: jaimemarquez.com This issue of Colloquy is made possible by the generous support of: The St. John’s College Office of Advancement The St. John’s College Bookstore The Colloquy Editorial Board is sincerely grateful to Ms. Emily Langston, Mr. Paul Ludwig, Mr. Louis Petrich, and Mr. Brandon Wasicsko. If you would like to participate in the mission of Colloquy, consider donating. Checks may be mailed to the following address: ATTN: Colloquy The Graduate Institute St. John’s College 60 College Avenue Annapolis, MD 21401 �The Graduate Institute 60 College Avenue Annapolis, MD 21401 � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Colloquy Description An account of the resource A student-run journal for the Graduate Institute community of St. John's College in Annapolis, Maryland. The issues feature essays, art, poetry, interviews, and more. 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Title A name given to the resource Colloquy, Spring 2019 Description An account of the resource Volume V of the Colloquy, published in Spring 2019. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Dorchester, Andrew (editor) Greene, Zachary N. (editor) Marquez, Jaime (editor) Poyner, Jordan (editor) Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2019-05 Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. Type The nature or genre of the resource text Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource pdf Language A language of the resource English Identifier An unambiguous reference to the resource within a given context Colloquy Vol 5 Spring 2019 Graduate Institute https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/sjcdigitalarchives/original/dc57d8444bd60cf16142c6dfa5592dc1.pdf 2313c9f0c7e826b854728ebc02c246da PDF Text Text Volume VI Fall 2019 Understanding and Freedom in Descartes’ Meditations Paul Tsavoussis The Fellowship of Learning William Pastille Plato’s Parmenides: An Erotic Romp Maxwell Anthony Conversation with Michael Dink Colloquy Editors Four Poems Louis Petrich The Truth of Fiction in the Odyssey Elusive Gods and Esoteric Philosophers Jordi Rozenman Ryan Shinkel Conversation with Sheba Delaney The Epidamnus Affair: A Verse Translation Photography by Jaime Marquez A Journal of the Graduate Institute at St. John’s College �COLLOQUY St. John’s College, 60 College Avenue, Annapolis, Maryland Volume VI: Fall 2019 Editorial Board Jordan Poyner, Editor-in-Chief Andrew Dorchester Charles Green Dimple Kaul Jaime Marquez Colloquy is a biannual publication of the Graduate Institute at St. John’s College in Annapolis, Maryland. Subscriptions are free. To subscribe or update your subscription, please send an e-mail to colloquy@sjc.edu with the subject line “Subscription.” Address correspondence to: Colloquy, The Graduate Institute at St. John’s College, 60 College Avenue, Annapolis, Maryland 21401. Students, tutors, and alumni of St. John’s College and the Graduate Institute are encouraged to submit manuscripts in PDF or Word format by email to colloquy@sjc.edu. Writers are encouraged to discuss proposals with an editor prior to submitting their work. The journal also accepts submissions of poetry, artwork, and photography. Please include your name, contact information, and the title of your work with your submission. Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in essays or interviews do not necessarily reflect those of St. John’s College or Colloquy. ©2020 Colloquy, St. John’s College. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited. �TABLE OF CONTENTS Letter from the Editors........................................................................................ 3 ESSAYS The Fellowship of Learning: Address to the Graduate Institute, July 19, 2019 William Pastille, Tutor .................................................................................... 4 Descartes on Understanding and Freedom Paul Tsavoussis ............................................................................................... 9 Thoughts on an Approach to a Study of Plato’s Parmenides Maxwell Anthony ............................................................................................ 31 Elusive Gods and Esoteric Philosophers Ryan Shinkel .................................................................................................... 52 The Truth of Fiction in the Odyssey Jordi Rozenman .............................................................................................. 74 CONVERSATIONS Michael Dink, Tutor ............................................................................................... 15 Sheba Delaney .......................................................................................................... 66 POETRY Four Poems Louis Petrich, Tutor ....................................................................................... 39 The Epidamnus Affair: A Verse Adaptation Gregory LaMontagne ..................................................................................... 61 Her, because of and despite Matt Ely ............................................................................................................ 88 Artwork by Jaime Marquez and Samuel Hage �Jaime Marquez �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Letter from the Editors Dear Readers, Conversation is the vital function of St. John’s and its approach to education—and we understand that essays and lectures cannot replace it. However, it is our belief that some ideas deserve elaboration and deserve to be considered in their elaborated form. It is in this spirit that we have approached the Fall 2019 issue. For the sixth issue of Colloquy, the editors have tried to curate an issue that comments on the principal subjects of the courses available this spring. The essays here are provocative, carefully articulated, and discuss the nature of understanding, truth, and the philosophical approach. We hope these essays—and the journal itself—might serve as companions and catalysts for conversations to come. Colloquy is a unique space where students in the Graduate Institute may share their intellectual and artistic labors. It is a space maintained by GI students and, more or less, for GI students. By spring of 2020, nearly all of the current members of the editorial board will be graduated. If you appreciate what the journal does—or could do—we encourage you to join the editorial board. –The Colloquy Editorial Board 3 �The Fellowship of Learning: Address to the Graduate Institute, July 19, 2019 William Pastille The Fellowship of Learning here at St. John’s has been bustling, what with the Graduate Institute working through its intense new summer schedule, the Summer Academy delivering us two small hordes of high school students, and many study groups meeting as well. Until last week I was in one of those study groups discussing Virginia Woolf’s novel called The Waves. The book is a tour-de-force of early twentieth-century modernism, with six main characters speaking in an indistinguishable mixture of interior monologue and external dialogue, all with the same mostly dispassionate voice, the same diction, and the same vocabulary, distributing their speeches over a plotless series of vignettes. Despite these severe technical restraints, Woolf manages to pull off a remarkable feat of literary prowess: she tells a mesmerizing story that helps the reader who is willing to keep re-reading the book to see ever more deeply into life. Now I know there is nothing more tedious than listening to a book report on a book you haven’t read, and that most of you haven’t read The Waves. But I’m willing to risk a little tedium because Woolf’s book brings out two important truths about life. The first is that our identities, the hard shells that protect us from the world’s darts, are permeable to the smallest words and deeds of others. The second is that everyone suffers from the world’s darts and we often have no idea whether those around us are suffering. In regard to the first truth, Woolf demonstrates the permeability of identity by having elements of the characters’ personalities flow from one to another through images and word-patterns—what the book calls “phrases.” One character needs to feel stability in the dizzying whirl of daily activity. The 4 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 phrase “fix the moment” arises to express that need. Another character needs to preserve the sense of completeness that emerges when close friends gather. The phrase “a chain whirling round” arises to express that need. These phrases pass from character to character, enter into their souls’ storehouses, and graft themselves onto their personalities. And this, it seems to me, is really the way it is. Thousands of “phrases” broken off from the being of others comprise much of our identity—perhaps much, much more than we know. One of my phrases, for instance, is the one I started with: the Fellowship of Learning. I first began to hear myself saying it some three decades ago. I don’t know whether it started as my own invention, or as something I heard from a colleague, or something I read in a book. But today it steps forth of its own accord from the soul’s storehouse to meet an appropriate occasion—like this one. What does it mean? It stands for all of us who know that learning has made us what we are and that it can remake us to be better than we are. It is the community of all those who, both as students and as teachers, try to keep learning alive in themselves and promote it in others. We are all of us members of the Fellowship of Learning or we would not be here. Now on to Woolf’s second truth, that we generally do not know what others are suffering. The Waves contains many encounters among the characters that show this only too clearly. Here is one involving two of the main characters when they are young adults. Neville goes to Bernard seeking validation of his career choice: he wants to be a poet. Bernard seems to suspect Neville’s need, but he cannot support Neville because he has no inner stability himself. He is painfully distracted because he is in love and frantic about what sort of persona he must project to impress his beloved. Neville ultimately bolts from the room in frustration, throwing a poem at Bernard’s head. Bernard quickly, and regretfully, identifies complexity and confusion in our inner lives as the 5 �William Pastille / The Fellowship of Learning cause of such painful events. “We are not simple,” he says, “as our friends would have us to meet their needs.” And this, it seems to me, is really the way it is. Everyone struggles internally with life’s frustrations. Unless we are told about those struggles—and there are many reasons why even our closest friends would not tell us—we cannot know the suffering that someone standing right in front of us may be enduring. Nevertheless, Bernard immediately follows up with this remark: “Yet love is simple,” he says. Hmm. We are not simple, yet love is simple? What does he mean by “simple”? In the History Tutorial, we have been reading authors who try to find meaning in the succession of historical events. Augustine sees the City of God shining through the excrement spattered upon the world by the misuse of free will. Hegel smooths over the pointless waste of life in history with a story in which Spirit is the protagonist who redeems all losses through selfactualization. Marx transforms Hegel’s story about Spirit into a story about the transformative forces of inanimate matter working their effects on human matter. Those of you in other segments have encountered other authors trying to attain similar ends. Plato’s world of Forms contains the clear originals of the confusing images we encounter here in the sublunary world. In Homer’s poems, the Fates weave a cohesive tapestry displaying a clear picture that links together the seemingly haphazard actions of gods and men. In all these attempts to find meaning, the authors look through what presents itself as disorder in the hope of seeing order in the distance behind. When they succeed, the bewildering chaos reveals itself to be foreground; the order behind the chaos reveals itself to be background, the relatively simple skeleton that supports the apparent complexity. 6 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Something like this is what Bernard meant by “Love is simple.” The complexities of life are foreground—a continual succession of apparently disordered events that either run smoothly or grind with friction. But love is background—the stable, if not always apparent, canvas on which all our life activities are painted. Bernard and Neville may be at odds in this moment, they may misunderstand each other and subsequently come to mistrust each other in some ways, but behind it all stands love, love that makes meaning of both trust and mistrust, cooperation and competition, closeness and reserve. There is foreground and background also in the Fellowship of Learning. The foreground is the Learning—the facts to be mastered, the ideas to be comprehended, the lesson plans to be covered. These keep coming at us, crowding up our days, rushing past at breakneck speed, and, sadly, disappearing quickly into the past, mostly without effect. But the background is the Fellowship. In the knowledge that suffering occurs, the essential act of fellowship is consolation. In all our learning, whether we are playing the role of student or teacher, we ought to keep our eyes on the deepest concerns of human life, some of which are no doubt distressing our fellow learners. We ought to direct our efforts toward deeper understanding that may lessen the suffering. Calm rationality, mutual respect, good humor, openness, offers of assistance, willingness to take up others’ questions as our own—the ways we treat one another as we engage the Learning in the foreground aids us in seeing through to the background. In the Fellowship of Learning we console one another through repeated acts of intellectual charity, solidarity, and sympathy. And in the knowledge that anything we say may enter imperceptibly into the storehouse of another’s soul, we should try to send out the very best of ourselves to our fellow learners. When we speak, either as teachers or as students, we should make our words as straight and as honest as we can, so 7 �William Pastille / The Fellowship of Learning that they will work no harm if they should take root in someone else’s personality and become their “phrases.” Does this sound difficult, like it requires a laborious artifice that will curb spontaneity and truthfulness? I assure you that it is not. Only one thing is required—love. And—as Bernard’s phrase will now, I hope, always step forth to remind you—love is simple. William Pastille has been a tutor at St. John’s College in Annapolis since 1986. He has also served as Assistant Dean and Director of the Graduate Institute. 8 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 The Alumni Association of St. John’s College funds a prize for a distinguished graduate tutorial essay written during the summer semester, which is awarded at summer commencement. An ad hoc committee of tutors teaching in the summer term will consider papers submitted by summer tutorial tutors. Award-winning essays are kept in the Greenfield Library. “Descartes on Understanding and Freedom,” by Paul Tsavoussis (AGI’20), is the 2019 award-winning essay. Descartes on Understanding and Freedom Paul Tsavoussis Where does the faculty of understanding reside in Descartes’ Meditations on First Philosophy and what does it elucidate in reference to free will? Men are decisive creatures. From the moment we wake to the moments before we fall asleep, we are inundated with stimuli that we must respond to: What to eat? What to wear? Whom to love? How to act? What to believe? Inevitably, we make bad decisions, but it is only through reflecting upon our decisionmaking process that we can limit the number of mistakes in the future, or at least not make the same mistakes twice. In his Fourth Meditation, Descartes attempts to discover how man errs. He concludes that man errs when his will outpaces his intellect, deciding unilaterally, without instruction from the intellect, what to affirm or engage. Throughout the meditation, Descartes relies heavily on the faculty of understanding to demonstrate this point, but at times it is not entirely clear where this faculty resides—in the domain of the will or that of the intellect? Descartes defines the intellect as a capability concerned exclusively with perception. He states: “For through the intellect alone I only perceive ideas on which I can pass judgement, nor can any error in the strict sense be found in 9 �Paul Tsavoussis / Descartes on Understanding and Freedom it when considered from this precise viewpoint” (40).1 The intellect is not the active decision-making faculty of man, rather, it is the domain of perception derived from God and therefore unerring, in the sense that what it does understand is correct (42). For Descartes, the intellect is limited in that it can only know what it knows, whereas the will is “unbounded by any limits” (41). Through this distinction, it becomes evident that Descartes believes that the faculty of understanding resides within the domain of the intellect. He claims: “For if, for example, I consider the faculty of understanding, I immediately recognize that in me it is very small and seriously limited” (41). Thus, given that the will is unlimited and the intellect is limited, it makes sense that the faculty of understanding, which is also limited, resides within the intellect. This understanding is supported further by Descartes’ definition of the will: “moved in relation to that which the intellect presents to us as to be affirmed or denied, pursued or avoided, in such a way that we feel we are not being determined in that direction by any external force” (41). The will does not seem to engage in any understanding of what is affirmed and denied, but rather is tasked with executing what the intellect has understood to be good and true. This passage places the will in a somewhat subservient stature to that of the intellect. Consequently, the faculty of understanding seems to remain exclusively within the domain of the intellect. Does the Will Understand? This clear distinction (with the faculty of understanding on the side of the intellect) is complicated by a discussion of man’s ability to recognize his relationship to God. Descartes states: “it is chiefly on account of the will that I understand that I bear a certain image and likeness of God” (41). This sentence seems to contravene what was previously laid out. Based on our prior reading, all ascertainable knowledge should be understood in the intellect and the will should simply engage it. However, Descartes seems to posit that it is “chiefly” through the will, and not the intellect, that man is capable of understanding that he bears a certain image of God. It is important to note 1 All parenthetical citations refer to page numbers in the following edition: René Descartes, Meditations on First Philosophy: with Selections from the Objections and Replies, trans. Michael Moriarty (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2008). 10 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 that the text does not say that the will enables man to judge that he bears a certain image of God, but even more so, that it is the will that enables man to understand that he bears a certain image of God. The import of this is that naturally there must be understanding before there is judgment, and if the faculty of understanding resides in the will then it would be nonsensical for judgement, which trails understanding, to be reversed back to the domain of the intellect. Consequently, the will would be the exclusive decision maker of man. It would appear from these definitions that the intellect simply perceives the ideas, and it is up to the will to assess the information and decide on how to proceed. Through this lens of the will, as the enclave of understanding, the weakness of the intellect becomes more apparent. Descartes’ simple definition of the intellect as perception, seems to be materially different from “understanding.” When one perceives something that does not necessarily entail that they understand it, in the same way that a man can perceive a hidden figure in the shadows, but not necessarily understand what is there. The Understanding Intellect Although confounding, Descartes tacks back toward his original conception of understanding, as related to the intellect, when he posits his reasoning as to how man errs. He states: The range of the will is greater than that of the intellect, I do not confine it within the same limits, but extend it even to matters I do not understand; and since it is indifferent to these, it easily falls away from the true and the good, and this is both how I come to be deceived and how I come to sin.2 The most significant aspect of this passage is that Descartes seems to state that all understanding occurs within the intellect. What surpasses the intellect exists in the realm of the will. Additionally, what is understood by the intellect is true and good. If the intellect does not understand a certain proposition, then that proposition cannot be true and good; and the will is indifferent towards it. Nevertheless, given the previous passage concerning the will’s capacity to understand, it seems feasible that the will is more than just a subservient tool 2 Ibid., 42. 11 �Paul Tsavoussis / Descartes on Understanding and Freedom of the intellect but also engages in a degree of agency. Support for this theory is evinced when Descartes claims: It clearly followed that I existed, I could not indeed refrain from judging that what I so clearly understood was true. It was not that I was compelled to this by some external force, but that a great illumination of the intellect was followed by a great inclination of the will; and in this way my belief was all the freer and more spontaneous for my being less indifferent.3 Here, Descartes delineates between judgment and understanding. Judgment is an act separate from understanding and what is understood to be good and true is not necessarily judged to be so. The significance of this is that judgment seems to be a faculty of the will, whereas understanding is a faculty of the intellect. In the same way that understanding precedes judgment, so too is the intellect “followed by a great inclination of the will.” Descartes believes that man has a natural inclination to that which the intellect deems correct and the more correct it is, the freer it is, since we are not indifferent to it. Indifference can be understood to mean the absence of a directive from the intellect. Essentially, we are indifferent to matters we do not properly understand because no perception or understanding of truth exists to attract the will to one view or the other. On its face, this conception of freedom does not seem all that free. If man can ascertain the truth through the natural workings of the intellect in a “great illumination” and then act upon it, where exactly is the choice? Wouldn’t it seem like there is more choice or more freedom if the answer was less obvious, and more choices were available to choose from? I may be conflating quantity of options with freedom, yet the point still stands that the intellect (which does not err when it does understand the truth) will not exactly create the conditions in which choice is necessary. Freedom Descartes makes clear that the will is synonymous with freedom of choice. He claims: “It is only the will, or freedom of choice, that I experience in myself as so great that I can form the idea of none greater” (41). The primary implication 3 Ibid. 12 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 of this is that, for Descartes, the intellect is not a constituent aspect of freedom of choice, rather it is solely within the bounds of the will that individual freedom for man exists. Nevertheless, Descartes seems to believe that the will, even if it chooses the true and the good, is misusing free choice if it does so unilaterally without the intellect. He claims: But if I either affirm or deny, then I am not making the right use of my freedom of choice; and if I adopt the view that is false, I shall be altogether deceived. Yet if I adopt the other view, although it happens to be the true one, I shall still be at fault, because it is manifest by the natural light that a decision on the part of the will should always be preceded by a perception on the part of the intellect. The privation in which the essence of error consists lies in this wrong use of free choice.4 Descartes maintains that the will is synonymous with free choice, yet if the will or free choice does not follow the intellect, then it is less free or a “wrong use of free choice.” Although this is a thought experiment and exists to a certain extent in the vacuum of Descartes’ mind, the belief that the intellect should always precede the will, especially to be the “right use of freedom” seems untenable. If the intellect is not able to provide an understanding, and the will still moves forward with a decision, how is this a perversion of freedom? Necessarily, it is best to know what is good through the intellect and engage it with the will, but matters of love and life oftentimes do not provide our intellect with enough understanding and the will must compensate. Is this still not a proper use of freedom? A possible reconciliation is tenable when we consider Descartes’ previous mention of the will as understanding our likeness to God. Descartes’ characterization of the will as understanding, and not just as a faculty of judgment, makes possible the idea that in judgment there must be at least a modicum of understanding in order to ascertain how to judge. Judgment is predicated upon understanding the options available and the merits behind those options. Therefore, maybe the will also has a faculty to understand. 4 Ibid., 43. 13 �Paul Tsavoussis / Descartes on Understanding and Freedom Descartes’ main point when claiming something is less free or more free is that the ideal form of freedom is that in which the will does not need to understand through judgement, but is pulled toward the truth of whatever the intellect is claiming without any hesitation. It is an emotive, natural freedom, where there is no consternation or debate, but rather the will is moved simply by the blatant obviousness or “natural light” of the understanding of the intellect. Paul Tsavoussis (AGI’20) is a second-semester student in the Graduate Institute. He is a Georgetown University alumnus interested in political theology and existentialism. Jaime Marquez 14 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor Colloquy: How does somebody—a young man no less—decide to leave Harvard and go to St. John’s? Michael Dink: Fortunately, this is a story I’ve rehearsed many times. As a high school student in Cincinnati, I had an English teacher who had attended Notre Dame and had done the Liberal Studies Program at Notre Dame. So he was an advocate of great books liberal studies programs and thought of St. John’s as the best program, and so he would often try to get his students to go to St. John’s. So that’s how I heard about St. John’s in the first place. But I thought it wouldn’t be so different to go to another school and major in philosophy. So I applied to Harvard and managed to get in, so I thought I may as well go there. In fact, I didn’t even apply to St. John’s I’m ashamed to say. So I went to Harvard and I discovered that, first of all, their philosophy department had little or no interest in the great books of philosophy. They took, by and large, a 20th Century analytical problems-oriented approach to philosophy, so that they didn’t usually offer courses that were focused on the great books of philosophy. So this was kind of a rude awakening and a disappointment for me, and I wasn’t quite sure what to do about that. And I also, I think, did not find fellow students who shared the interest that I had in reading and studying and talking about these things. — So at the end of freshman year, we were required to declare a major and having been deprived of philosophy as my effective major, I wasn’t sure what to do. I spoke with two St. John’s alumni—one was Rogers Albritton, who was a professor of philosophy [at Harvard] and I had actually sat in on a class which he taught called “Humanities Five,” which was a general education class, not a philosophy class. So he did actually assign and talk about some of the great books of philosophy in that class. He was an alum from the 40’s. The other was a graduate student in the history of science, who was a recent St. John’s alumnus (Bruce Collier). What I was considering was trying to make up my 15 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor own major, which is something you could petition to do at that time at Harvard, and that would try somehow to imitate St. John’s. So Professor Albritton said that is the one thing you don’t want to do: that would be the worst of both worlds. He said: “fish or cut bait.” I don’t know if you know that expression—choose one thing or the other, don’t temporize. The other guy said, “what do you want to be at Harvard for? It’s just another mediocre university with a lot of very bright people walking around.” — So, nonetheless, I retreated a little bit. I got into this major called History and Literature, which was a special major that allowed you to take courses in different departments toward your major, although it still required some kind of concentration—either in a particular country or in a time period. So I sort of randomly picked Early Modern, because it seemed to me to be sort of in the middle—maybe I should have picked Medieval. And I returned [to Harvard] for my Sophomore year. But on the way back from home, from Cincinnati to Boston, I decided to go through Annapolis and visit St. John’s. So I did a prospective visit and I met a student there who was at St. John’s under duress, because his father made all of his children go to St. John’s and he wanted to be at Princeton. So here I was a Harvard student thinking about going to St. John’s and he was a St. John’s student wishing he were at the Ivy League. So I did my prospective visit, I was intrigued, I was interested, I was thinking about it, but I went back and did another semester at Harvard. And things weren’t really getting better. — So I went home for winter vacation and on the very last day of winter vacation I called up this old high-school English teacher and asked to talk to him. We had a long talk and when I left I decided I’d apply to St. John’s for what used to be called the February Freshman Class, which was a class that started in February and did the first semester of freshman year during the second semester and the second semester over the summer so as to catch up. I would thereby lose only one year starting over. And at that time both St. John’s and Harvard didn’t finish their first semester until the end of January. That’s why there were February freshmen then. Harvard had this thing called Reading Period for three weeks after you come back from winter vacation, unless you 16 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 were in math and science classes—in which case your classes went on. But for other classes, classes were suspended and you were writing papers and preparing for exams. So I took the first week of Reading Period and wrote my St. John’s application, which at that time required five essays, and sent that in. After a little while I heard back from them that I’d been accepted and they told me what the financial aid offer was. So at this point I finally decided to tell my parents. CQ: So they were completely in the dark ‘till this time? Wow. MD: And it was the case that we were needy, so that at Harvard they were not paying anything. I had a contribution from summer work and [an] on-campus job and there was a loan, but there was not a parental contribution. The offer from St. John’s was not so generous, so there was a gap that they would have had to fill. They were very understanding and did not object to my leaving Harvard to come to St. John’s, but they said “we have no money to contribute, so we can’t help you with this.” So I called St. John’s back and said, “sorry, I’d like to come but I can’t do it financially.” So a couple of days later, half a week later, they called back and got in touch with me and said: “we found a little more money to offer you.” It still wasn’t quite a complete filling of the gap, but I thought that I would be able to manage, I would be able to work enough—if I earned more by working than I was getting from my on-campus job at Harvard then I could fill the gap. So I came. — There was one other complication: this was January of 1972. My entering college class or graduating high-school class was the last class to get student deferments from the draft at the time of the Vietnam war. And the lottery had been instituted so that you got a number which gave your likelihood of being drafted if you didn’t have a deferment. So there was one number for each birthdate and my number was 38. So if I lost my student deferment, it was almost a certainty that I would be drafted. There were plenty of draft counselors in Cambridge at the time as you can imagine and I spoke to some of them, but nobody knew what to predict because in order to keep your student deferment you were supposed to make normal progress. So one can 17 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor easily imagine that a draft board would regard going from being a sophomore to being a freshman as something other than normal progress. So I took a leave of absence from Harvard, so I had not burned my bridges. I went ahead and took all my exams and I arrived on campus a few days after the first classes, so I missed my first few classes and my first Seminar. I think pretty soon I was convinced that I had done the right thing. I waited about a month and wrote to my draft board. I got a letter back saying: “what’s going on Mr. Dink?” So I asked the Dean here at St. John’s—it was Robert Goldwin at the time—to write to my draft board and explain my situation and he did. I didn’t know what he said. He was someone who had some political connections: I didn’t know whether he had used them or not. But I did then get a letter from my draft board saying “ok, you can keep your student deferment.” Left to right: Michael Dink, Dimple Kaul, Jaime Marquez 18 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 CQ: When did you get [the letter]? MD: I don’t remember how long I had to wait. CQ: That period must have been like “Oh My God! What’s going to happen?” MD: Yes, it was a little worrisome. But the funny thing is that later when I was dean—from 2005 to 2010—they were cleaning out some of the old correspondence and they came upon the letter that Dean Goldwin had written to my draft board. And it was just perfectly straightforward explaining, you know, that everyone has to start over at St. John’s and that Mr. Dink was doing very good work academically here, and they thought he deserved to keep his student deferment or something like that. Still don’t know if he could have done anything else. CQ: How did you know when you began at Harvard that you wanted to pursue philosophy? At that age, how were you so interested? MD: Well I went to a Catholic parochial school in Cincinnati and part of that was you had a religion class every year. So [in] the religion class in maybe it was just senior year—I’m not sure whether it was junior or senior year—we read some existential philosophy. So that’s what piqued my interest and I said “well this is what people are talking about now, but there’s a whole history stretching back—I should figure out how they got there, what other people had to say about these questions.” CQ: Were you a voracious reader as a child? Were you into reading? MD: Yes, I was a pretty active reader. Mostly things like mysteries and sports books and things like that. CQ: So school influence brought philosophy into your life—at home what was the whole environment like? Would you discuss books with your dad and mom or your siblings? 19 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor MD: Not so much. My dad did have a college degree: it was in agriculture. And he had a blue-collar job working for the Postal Service. My mom did not have a college degree and was a homemaker—four kids. But they were concerned that we get a good education. So they scraped money together to send us to parochial school. And sort of made sure we did our homework, and monitored our grades and everything. So they were concerned that we get a good education. And they did take us to the library, the public library, but there were not a lot of books in the house. CQ: I don’t have nowhere near the amount of time that you have devoted to the great books. One thing that I have experienced while here at St John’s is that I have read [the] Meno more than once. My attitude, my understanding of it has changed with every subsequent reading. And so that is the question: have your views on what makes an eminently great book great changed for you over the years? Did that make sense? MD: Yes, although I was surprised—I thought you had shifted a little bit. I thought your first question [was]: “Do I change my readings of particular books from one reading to another?” That’s what I thought you were going to ask. CQ: Say that the first time you read The [Theory of] Moral Sentiments—okay, I think this book is great for the following reason. And then you read it again and now, well, I still think it’s a great book, but it’s for a different reason. So then not only your engagement, your interaction, your perception of the book—pick any book—how has that changed? Or has it changed? MD: I am not sure that I change my idea of what makes makes it great. I think I am sort of flexible about that. There are different ways of being great. Although, by and large, I think it’s mostly raising fundamental questions in a deep, complex way that is carefully articulated. So I think probably for the most part I think what happens is that I refine my understanding as I go through. It is probably not so frequent that I have a radical reorientation of how to read a book, but that may happen to some extent, from time to time, 20 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 although I don’t know that I have a great example off the top of my head to give you about that. CQ: What I had in mind. This is going to be a silly example, but when I hear musical pieces from Bach or Beethoven and you hear it repeatedly and suddenly you say “God! I never heard that note before and it was there all along.” Then that’s the sense in which to what extent the great books have done this for you. MD: Again it seems to me differences, right? You could say that I hadn’t heard it before and it changes everything. That’s one thing. Another thing is: “Oh, I hadn't noticed that before.” That shifts a little bit or adds something. So my sense is adding, refining is more the normal response and that radical reorientation is less common. But I wouldn't say it never happens, but I don’t have a good example of that happening to me. CQ: This is not exactly like a subsequent question, but I was wondering: when tutors come here, they would come as specialists—like a PhD in something— and then over a period of their stint at St. John’s, I would like to believe they are more of generalists. I’m told they take all courses and no tutor is there who is not taught almost all subjects. So how does this transformation happen? MD: You just learn by doing. I think most tutors come from roughly a humanities background where the focus is reading books and thinking about them. So for most of us the challenge is learning to do the math and science classes. But you know, we’re doing them from original texts, so part of that is just another instance of careful reading. And the program is structured so that things build upon one another, right? So you start with freshman math: it’s Euclid, it’s not fundamentally more difficult than high school geometry. It’s done with an emphasis on proofs and the rigor of proofs much more so than high school geometry, but it doesn’t presuppose anything. So doing Euclid you can just read the book and follow the logic, and it doesn’t presuppose any prior preparation in mathematics. 21 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor CQ: So stick to the text is what helps basically? MD: Yeah and start from the beginning in some way. And then Ptolemy builds on Euclid. There are elements of observation and familiarity with the skies and so forth. So there’s a bit of supplementing that we try to do with that. But again it’s basically intelligible building on Euclid. Roughly that’s the way it works: if you go sequentially through the program, what you need for the next step—the foundation has been laid down in the previous steps. So Tutors work their way through, learn along with—or slightly ahead of—the students. And again it’s crucial that the students don’t expect us to be the experts telling them how it works, but they have accepted the situation that it’s a group enterprise and we’re trying to figure it out together. And, in general, I think they are more likely to be upset with a Tutor who tries to tell them too much than with a Tutor who admits that he doesn’t understand something and needs to work it out with them or go to a colleague and get help. — Now all this said, I have to make a shameful confession, which is that there is a class I have not taught and that’s the sophomore Music Tutorial. And I feel particularly intimidated at that prospect, feel particularly—it’s an insufficiency of my childhood education that I never learned to play an instrument, did not have much instruction or experience with music. And I feel like I have no ear. I did the St. John’s Music Tutorial as a student. I spent a sabbatical auditing it, being a full-fledged student, writing papers and everything. So I have some familiarity with what it contains and what the issues and questions are. I just feel that I, myself, do harmonic analysis very slowly and painfully, and without any facility and without [the] ability to translate very well what I’m analyzing into hearing. So I feel all these things are an obstacle to my doing what I ought to do, which is to teach the Tutorial. CQ: Do you think that soon anytime you might remedy that situation? MD: I don’t know. I won’t promise it! I toy with the idea, but I might have to be semi-retired and clear the decks of everything else if I were to take it on. 22 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 CQ: That’s a formidable task it seems. Music is formidable—can you imagine?—for somebody who thinks philosophy is so obvious. This is so interesting. MD: Yeah, philosophy, math, and science—those are not so hard. CQ: This is really a very different insight into human psyche, thank you for being so candid with us! I was just wondering if there’s a difference in the approach with the undergrad students and the GIs because I’m sure at both levels you’re dealing with a different level of maturity and the emotional quotient is different. So even though the undergraduates could have a higher IQ, so how does one do that? And how does the Tutor cultivate this entire persona, aura, and demeanor of being a participant while at the same time being in control? So two questions. MD: That’s a lot. Let me take the second one first. The important thing is that the Tutor really see him or herself as a fellow inquirer, right? That we’re all trying to figure something out. You may be farther along the road, you may be more familiar with the material—you may have read it before, come to certain conclusions before or noticed certain things before—but you always are open to learning new things from it and from the class. In a certain way, the more you’ve worked with a book, in some ways, the more open you can be to different possibilities coming from the students. So you can say, “Oh yeah, that’s interesting, we could pursue that. I see what you’re getting at, I see a path we could go down there: let’s work on it together.” I think, again, there are different styles. — As I get older and become a more experienced Tutor, I am probably not as good at stepping back and just letting the conversation go. I find myself drawn to intervene more, though I try to tell myself that I’m [intervening] with a positive response to what the students are saying. I’m trying to follow up the line of inquiry they are initiating, not driving it myself away from what they want to talk about. There is an interplay: the students set an agenda by the questions they raise, I might then influence the way it goes, because I see a 23 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor way in which that line that they have raised could be pursued. And maybe it’s not exactly the way they were thinking of pursuing it—I don’t know. Other Tutors may be better—maybe I was better when I was younger, maybe not— at sitting back and letting the class go, especially in Seminar. — Now as to the difference between undergraduates and Graduate Institute students: undergraduate students have four years, so one can afford to give them some time to learn from their mistakes in a way. And there’s a definite process in freshmen classes whereby they are learning to be St. John’s students. They need to learn it by experience in some way and to find out what things do and don’t work. And you can help to show them, rather than tell them for the most part. Sometimes you have to tell people some things. But show them that certain ways of being in class are productive of good and interesting discussions in class, and other ways of being in class are counterproductive. I think there are some problematic tendencies that are more common in freshmen than in Graduate Institute students. There’s a kind of student who kind’ve wants to show off and is most eager to tell people what they’ve already figured out, rather than to engage in a common inquiry. Occasionally one comes across that in a Graduate Institute student, but I think it’s not quite as common. This is not [just] an age difference but a structure difference: you have a mixture of new students and continuing students in every Graduate Institute class. So there are some people who have experience with it and they can help to model behavior. CQ: In terms of the students, either GI or undergraduate, has there been a been a significant change since you have been here? MD: That's a hard question. Partly because any change that would happen would be gradual, over a long career, and you're seeing, you’re observing from year to year, it's hard to go back and remember what it was like thirty years ago. CQ: In terms of, say, your enthusiasm? 24 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 MD: I incline to the opinion that Johnnies are pretty similar through time and space. Other than appearance, once you're in a class that kind of drops away. I don't know if I could tell what decade I was in if you put me in a time machine and plopped me down in a class. CQ: In the Hartle Room, when we look at photographs of the students, they look different, if nothing else in the outfits. MD: Right, right. CQ: I was just wondering if they were more serious in general—in their attitude towards life or concerns for society. And, you know, they dress the part. Whereas if you were to take pictures of today's students, we would look very different than the ones from those pictures. MD: I would hesitate to draw that conclusion. I would hesitate to correlate the mode of dress with the seriousness of the student. I had a friend, as an undergraduate at St John's, who was kind of notorious for going around campus in his sock feet: shoeless, but not sockless! A very serious student. CQ: We as students, our degree of excitement and engagement towards the great books has not—from what you’ve seen—has not changed in any appreciable way. MD: No. CQ: Do you find any difference between the domestic and international students in both undergrad and [the] GI? MD: Well, not really in general. There's one specific area where I've noticed something which I think has been a good thing. I taught sophomore Seminar— three out of four years in the past five or six years. And this was during a period when we had a larger proportion of international students than we had in the past. In the past, it was [often] a kind of issue in sophomore 25 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor Seminar—where we read biblical and other religious texts—of people bringing their religious convictions to bear in a way that, you know, means they don't listen to each other as well as they could. They can be defensive and sort of polarized, and so forth. I think having a larger proportion of international students, who don't come from a Judeo-Christian or even Abrahamic background, has been helpful in that respect. They are more of an impartial spectator to these disputes. They can read the Bible more naively, openmindedly, and say: “who is this character, God, and why is he behaving this way?” I think that really helps the other students to see: “oh yeah, we don't have to read this the way we learn to in Sunday school or we don't have to be hostile because we've rejected all that.” So that I think has been a great benefit that I've experienced in sophomore Seminar from having more international students. CQ: So you have also been a part of the Santa Fe campus for four years. MD: Yeah, a long time ago. CQ: But if you were [to] just compare your initial years there and your initial years here, [is there] any perceptible difference or do you think it's just the same thing? That St John's is the same everywhere? MD: I think the sameness is more fundamental than any differences. It's very hard to separate—you tried to set it up so there was my youthful years in Santa Fe versus my youthful years in Annapolis, right? It's also complicated because I was a student in Annapolis, so there were still tutors that I had been a student under here Annapolis, where it wasn't so much the case in Santa Fe. So I really don't want to go there, to try to draw comparisons. CQ: But now Annapolis is home, almost? MD: Yeah, I certainly still enjoy visiting Santa Fe. When I was dean, I was there a lot for meetings and my son went to the Santa Fe campus partly 26 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 because I was dean in Annapolis when he was a student. And I was there this summer to teach Summer Classics for the first time. I think I will go back. CQ: I think the reason I also brought up Santa Fe is because they have that Eastern Classics program—have you taught any of those books? MD: I have not taught the Eastern Classics, no. I’ve done a few little things in what used to be called the Executive Seminar and now the Year of Classics. The Bhagavad Gita and some Confucius, but not with as serious of an approach as they do with the Eastern Classics program. CQ: You have a Western civilization [program] and an Eastern civilization [program], but are we ever going to, in the future, look at an overall Human Civilization program, which is integrated and comprehensive and chronological? MD: How many years do you think this will take? [Laughter] CQ: That’s my question! Is it possible? MD: I think it's very difficult. I think it's difficult to do justice to any of these traditions, even in four years. So that's the tough question and the tradeoff, right? Would you do no justice to either of them—or any of them—by trying to do all of them in some limited space of time, like four years? I think, although I haven't taught the Eastern Classics: it looks from the outside like it's a pretty serious program. It's pretty good, it's doing something like what we do here: going sequentially and building up the traditions. But I don't know. You know, what we do is just a slice of the Western tradition. What they do is just a slice of the eastern traditions, right? There’s more: there's the Islamic tradition, which we don't do justice to, we don’t do anything from. So there's a lot. Yeah, there are a lot more great books worth studying, but they do tend to be parts of traditions that it's—I think it’s important to read them in the traditions or conversations in which they flourished or were written. To just pluck 27 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor something out—pluck things from different traditions and juxtapose them— I think is not the best approach. So, I think it's a very great problem. CQ: You don't think it's feasible because of the context? MD: Yeah, I mean we don't have an academic mode set up to accommodate this. If you spent eight years—if you did four years in the Western great books, four years in the Eastern great books, I don't know, four years in the Islamic great books, but no: there isn't an academic structure to do that in. And because of the distinction that people make between undergraduate and graduate school, if you go on to graduate school, they're not going to want you to start all over again with another tradition. They want you to specialize within a tradition. There’s an Islamic undergraduate great books college that's called Zaytuna College in California, where that's being developed. And I think there’s also an eastern, maybe Buddhist-based one whose name I forget. I think probably in California too. And I think Ms. Brann is interested in getting us all to talk together about doing these different great books programs. So, you know, if somebody wanted to go sequentially through these three colleges it would take twelve years and a lot of money. [Laughter] CQ: Is there any particular book that you feel could have been a part of the curriculum, but is not because of certain reasons? MD: That's a difficult one too. We make choices. There are authors who wrote more than one book that could well have been included, and some have more than one book, but others don’t. I mean, obviously, I think Adam Smith’s [The] Theory of Moral Sentiments is a worthy book. Maimonides is read in [the] Santa Fe undergraduate curriculum, but not here. We just switched from Spinoza’s Theologico-Political Treatise to his Ethics. I would like to have both of them. And the whole question of what to do with—I mean, senior year now has some things from the 19th century, some things from the 20th century, and now we're in the 21st century. So I think there is, again, a difficult question about what are the great books of the 20th century. And how do we select them? How would we find a place for them, how do we fit them in? I think we’re 28 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 starting to think about that, but it’s a difficult question. I'm sure there are 20th, and maybe even 21st, century books that we should be reading, and [we] haven't figured out which ones are the right ones and how to fit them in. CQ: I just wanted to get your reaction to something that I think I perceive. And it has to do with the extent to which the orientation of the GI emanates from [the] Meno: this issue of recollection—Meno loves the allegory of the cave, Meno loves dialectics—and the extent to which my sense is that what St. John’s offers, or has done for me, is not just the great books. I mean, I can go and read them on my own. So, it's a combination of the great books and the conversation. MD: Exactly. CQ: And I wouldn’t say that all of it stems from [the] Meno, but if we wanted to go and trace the books that shaped, at least the GI, I think [the] Meno has to be in it. And then I say: “why is the GI introducing all the students through [the] Meno, if not to expose us to—to be curious about questions that seem obvious?” MD: It seems to me a couple of things about the Meno: one is just the fairly obvious thing that teaching is not just handing something over, not just transmitting something. And therefore it's not something passive that the learner suffers at the hand of an active teacher. But that activity is required of the learner, so that learning is more fundamental than teaching. Teaching is— if there is teaching, it's kind of assisting learning, right? Or trying to set up the conditions for learning. So, you might say, the priority of learning over teaching or teaching is ancillary: whatever teaching there is, is ancillary to the fundamental activity which is learning. And then, of course, secondly: that realizing that you don't know what you think you know is the precondition of learning. So those things seem to be the kind of obvious takeaways. And I think the doctrine of recollection as something specific is relatively less important. But there are those lurking questions about incommensurability in 29 �A Conversation with Michael Dink, Tutor the mathematical example that maybe not everyone sees at the first reading. So that’s something that takes a little more Euclid to get at. CQ: If you were to describe the crux of St. John’s and why you think a learner should come to St. John’s, what would you say? MD: I think it's the opportunity to think about fundamental and important questions with other people who are concerned with those questions and want to think about them and talk about them. It’s hard to find such people, so part of it is just bringing together those people. Mr. Dink was born in Louisville, Kentucky and raised in Cincinnati, Ohio. He attended Harvard College, earned his BA at St. John’s College, Annapolis, and earned his MA and Ph.D. in Philosophy from Catholic University of America. He has taught on both the Santa Fe and Annapolis campuses, and has served as Athletic Director, Graduate Institute Director, and Dean of the College. He has lectured on Homer, Plato, Aristotle, Rousseau, Adam Smith, Milton, and Molière. 30 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Thoughts on an Approach to a Study of Plato’s Parmenides: An Erotic Romp Maxwell Anthony Since finishing my Master’s Essay on Plato’s Euthydemus1 a string of associations has led me to this only half-flippant hypothesis: the Parmenides is Plato’s most erotic dialogue. Here I will first present the string of clues from Plato’s dialogues that led me to this conjecture and then offer some thoughts about the Parmenides’s dramatic presentation that I think corroborate my suspicion. In my Master’s Essay I explicate the central image of the Euthydemus: Socrates and his interlocutor Cleinias appearing like children chasing after larks. A point that occurred to me after finishing the essay is that the obvious goal of chasing after a bird is to capture it. I remembered how, in my freshman year of college, a sparrow was loose in the halls of my dormitory. One student attempted to take the bird into her hands and deliver it to safety. Somehow she managed to charm the bird into her clutch, but, being held, the little sparrow let out such a scream that I never again doubted the evolutionist’s claim that dinosaurs are the ancestors of modern birds. The girl let the bird go, and the bird went. Children chasing after birds do not intend to catch them. They enjoy the play of chasing without the goal of acquiring. Although such chasing does not aim at acquiring the thing it plays to seek, it does acquire something—the pleasure and play of the activity itself. Socrates says that he and Cleinias appeared like children chasing after larks. Is there a mature way to chase after larks? This question led me to think: does mature bird-catching involve learning to mimic 1 Maxwell Anthony, “Chasing After Larks: the Justice of θυµός in Plato’s Euthydemus,” (2019), available at the Greenfield Library. 31 �Maxwell Anthony / Thoughts on an Approach to a Study of the Parmenides the bird’s song? However, if in Socrates’ metaphor the birds represent knowledge of particular arts, how could a bird ever be fooled by something it is not? It occurred to me that the purpose of chasing after larks might not be to capture the bird, as if philosophy were simply an acquisition of external ‘knowledge’ or ‘ideas’ or ‘things’ out there, but that by imitating the bird’s song we draw out of ourselves and make ourselves into the thing we pursue. This point led me to consider the image of the soul growing wings and taking flight in the Phaedrus but also caused me to wonder: how is it that the brothers’ imitation of Socratic philosophy in the Euthydemus does not strike us as an image of children “chasing after larks?” In the Euthydemus my favorite Platonic character, Ctesippus, dismisses the brothers as cold stiffs. This aside caused me to think that somehow Ctesippus sees a parallel between the brothers’ abstract sophistry and their being cold, which reminded me of Plato’s Seventh Letter and the sudden kindling of a soul by the flame of another. Plato’s language of catching fire (πῦρ2) in the Seventh Letter reminded me of Socrates’ famous description of himself taking the flame (φλέγεσθαι) as he glimpsed under Charmides’ cloak. This connection led me to see that the Euthydemus is, in a certain way, an image of the Charmides. In both dialogues Socrates talks with a beautiful youth encircled by a crowd in a public space. However, in the Charmides, Socrates is explicitly a young man, and in the Euthydemus he is explicitly an old man. So, I wondered, what is different about Socrates’ interaction with Charmides and his interaction with Cleinias. Although Socrates’ interaction with Cleinias in the Euthydemus occurs in the Lyceum’s changing room—recalling Chaerephon’s suggestion that Charmides strip—Socrates does not report to Crito in the Euthydemus that he “caught the flame” (Charmides 155d). Is Socrates any less erotic as an old man in the Euthydemus than he is as a young man in the Charmides? Thinking about this question, I remembered the following statement by the Athenian Stranger in Book Seven of the Laws: “May a seductive, erotic love of bird 2 All Greek is from Perseus.tufts.edu. 32 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 hunting, which is hardly a liberal pursuit, never come over any of the young.”3 Well, Socrates, in the central image of the Euthydemus, chases after larks, and the apparent drama of the Euthydemus is Socrates’ effort to get Cleinias chasing with him. We see the tension starkly and playfully between Socrates and the Athenian Stranger in comparing these two passages. The Athenian Stranger is obviously talking about philosophy and Socrates, in the Euthydemus, is just as erotic chasing after larks, like a child, as he is catching the flame in the Charmides. Socrates chasing after larks with Cleinias is the image of philosophic eros. How does this erotic aspect bear on the memetic quality of chasing after larks? This question drew me to the Parmenides. In its most basic look, the Parmenides is most similar to the Symposium, Theaetetus, and Phaedo, as these four dialogues appear to us as inherited narrations. The Phaedo is closest to the events depicted as Phaedo himself relates what he witnessed at Socrates’ death, and the Theaetetus is mediated by Socrates’ narration to Euclides, Euclides’ writing, and the slave boy’s reading. Simply as objects of inherited gossip or memorized speech, the Symposium and the Parmenides are the most similar of Plato’s dialogues. This similarity is the initial clue that now draws my interest to the Parmenides. We should approach the Parmenides with the same excitement and anticipation as someone asking for the story of the Symposium from Apollodorus. However, whereas in the Symposium there are apparently varied and garbled versions of the speeches on love, there is something of a clean and direct transmission of the conversation in the Parmenides. Although both dialogues reveal something erotic behind the oral transmission of events, the different transmissions seem to suggest something different about the content of each conversation. This likeness to the Symposium suggests that the Parmenides must be approached with the question of its form as an inherited narration, and the motivation behind that inheritance in mind. The Symposium is one version among other garbled narrations, whereas the narration of the Parmenides is 3 Plato, The Laws of Plato, trans. Thomas L. Pangle (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1988), 823e. 33 �Maxwell Anthony / Thoughts on an Approach to a Study of the Parmenides exact and explicitly demanding. The motive for the transmission of each, and the effect of that motive on the transmission of each, seems to be a clue about the erotic nature of philosophy. Given the extremely abstract and awesome majesty of the Parmenides, both as it appears to us and in its Neoplatonic legacy, I wonder: is the Parmenides an example of philosophy? What even is the Parmenides? The dialogue announces itself to us with the heading Cephalus. Just as there is something apparently “heady” and reverently senior about the Cephalus of the Republic, there is a similar duality with this Cephalus of Clazomenae. Both Cephaluses are loathsomely pretentious. The Cephalus of the Republic puts forward a moral pretense of escaping from sexual desire and advances the disgustingly dull view that the best we can hope for is a moderately burdensome old age.4 Something about the orderly and wellcontented view of life presented by the Cephalus of the Republic is mirrored in Cephalus of the Parmenides’s narration. The head abstracted from the body is a perversion and degradation. Plato’s challenge seems to be for us to see how and why this “image” of philosophy is distorted. So we must ask: what do we know about the character of Cephalus of Clazomenae and what does his character suggest about the drama of the Parmenides—the drama of the form and content, the dialectic of the human and the things humans say. The first thing we know is that Cephalus came to Athens with a group. He meets Adeimantus and Glaucon in the marketplace. Adeimantus takes Cephalus’s hand and says, “Welcome, Cephalus. If there is anything you want here that we can do for you, please tell us” (126a-c).5 Cephalus asks that Adeimantus show him to Adeimantus’ and Glaucon’s half-brother Antiphon, who is also Plato’s half-brother. Cephalus explains, “These men are fellow citizens of mine (πολῖταί τ᾽ ἐµοί εἰσι), keen philosophers, and they have heard that this Antiphon met many times with a friend of Zeno’s called Pythodorus and can recite from memory the discussion that Socrates and Zeno and Parmenides once had, since he heard 4 Plato, Republic, 329d. All quotations of the Parmenides are from: Plato, Parmenides, trans. Mary Louise Gill & Paul Ryan (Indianapolis, IN: Hackett Publishing Co., 1996). 5 34 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 it often from Pythodorus.” We are confronted with the duality of Cephalus’ pretense and his actual activity. His pretense is that he and his troop are “keen philosophers” and that they want to hear this famous conversation. Desiring to hear the speech is certainly a philosophic impulse. But, there is also something suspiciously unphilosophic and repulsive about Cephalus’ request. First, to include oneself in a troop of “keen philosophers” (µάλα φιλόσοφοι) is suspicious. If Cephalus and his troop are such keen philosophers, why do they have to travel to Athens to hear a speech? Their own conversation and friendship must be so insufficient that it requires going all the way to Athens. While there is something searching and erotic about this going out, it disguises a deeper flaw and pose. I suspect that Cephalus, although deeply invested in the conversation he requests, also wants to impress his “keen philosopher” troop by dipping into the string pool of his prior association with Plato’s family. Cephalus cannot remember Antiphon’s name but asks that Antiphon recite from memory the conversation. Cephalus’ memory is insufficient and he wants to supplement his insufficiency with the inheritance of a memorized speech. In short, Cephalus’ desire is that he be a philosopher by simply memorizing arguments. Just as the Republic is a critique of political idealism, the Parmenides is a critique of “heady” formalism. Adeimantus says that, “When Antiphon was a young man, he practiced it [the conversation] to perfection (εὖ µάλα διεµελέτησεν), although these days, just like the grandfather he’s named for, he devotes most of his time to horses” (126c). So, somehow we have it that a troop of self-proclaimed philosophers, who are really “citizens,” are going to hear a recitation from someone who spends his time with horses. Antiphon’s preference for horses leads me to a series of associations: Socrates as a gadfly biting the horse Athens, Hippias’s political service as an ambassador,6 and Ctesippus acting as guardian of Socrates. The horse and the city go together. Something about Cephalus’ 6 Plato, Greater Hippias, 281a. 35 �Maxwell Anthony / Thoughts on an Approach to a Study of the Parmenides expectation and Antiphon’s careful practice of the conversation go together and suggest the relief of philosophy. The group goes to Antiphon’s house and finds him “engaging a smith to work on a bit of some kind” (127a). He initially “balks” at reciting the conversation. “It was, he said, a lot of work,” reports Cephalus, “But finally he narrated it in detail.” According to Adeimantus, Antiphon, as a young man, practiced the speech with great care, seemingly bringing his recitation to perfection as though it were the poetic object of a craft like horseshoes or bridles. However, Antiphon turned from this care to the political concern for horses, following his grandfather’s ancestral example. Evidently recitation, no matter how profound, careful, precise, or perfect is not sufficient for turning one’s attention from the gentlemanly political concerns of “engaging a smith to work on a bit of some kind.” Moreover, Glaucon’s silence throughout this episode reminds us of Socrates’ apparent preference for conversation with him over Adeimantus, the more assertive and political of the brothers in the Parmenides. Cephalus reports: “Antiphon said that Pythodorus said that Zeno and Parmenides once came to the Great Panathenaea. Parmenides was already quite venerable, very great but of distinguished appearance, about sixty-five years old. Zeno was at that time close to forty, a tall handsome man who had been, as rumor had it, the object of Parmenides’ affections when he was a boy (καὶ λέγεσθαι αὐτὸν παιδικὰ τοῦ Παρµενίδου γεγονέναι)” (127a-b). The provided English translation is an interpretative rendering of the more exact: “and it was said that he became Parmenides’ darling (παιδικός).” παιδικός is an erotic word, implying that, according to rumor’s distortion, the relationship of Parmenides and Zeno might have been pederastic.7 So, the first hint of the erotic we find in the dialogue, after Cephalus’ dubious introduction of his philosopher friends, is in the educative relationship of Parmenides and Zeno. Moreover, this sense is presented between speaking 7 Thanks to Jeffrey Ulrich for pointing out this implication. 36 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 (λέγεσθαι) and having become (γεγονέναι). I take this presentation as a clue to a general theme following from my thoughts on the mimetic character of the erotic “chasing after larks” in the Euthydemus. What is the relation of eros and the coming into being of speech? The Parmenides is perhaps the most mimetic of all the dialogues, and something about its coming into being is like Thrasymachus’ precise speech. But this precise recital and memorized speech is haunted by eros. At a deeper level, the dialogue’s arguments involve becoming in regards to unity. Recalling Aristophanes’ speech in the Symposium, we must wonder: what does the form of the arguments presented in the Parmenides suggest about unity and eros? The Parmenides, although perfected and rehearsed in its transmission, is broken in its content. Cephalus’ tyrannical impulse to the simple unity of rehearsed speech is at odds with the discussion of the one with the young character Aristotle. The Parmenides is itself an image of eros, of the togetherness of unity and difference, against the formal perfection of recitation. The only explicit mention of eros occurs when Parmenides, like Antiphon, hesitantly assents to give a demonstration (137a). The parallels of Parmenides’ journey across a “sea of words,” and Cephalus’ journey from Clazomenae, and Parmenides’ citation of Ibycus’ poem and Antiphon’s business with horses, suggest that the mere recital of speeches is not simply philosophical, but that there is a link between recital and rejuvenation, especially seen through Zeno, that is easily corrupted and mistaken. Perhaps the reflection of Zeno’s and Parmenides’ relationship in speech mirrors the recited transmission of the conversation itself. The Parmenides is, moreover, Plato’s presentation of Socrates at his youngest. As a start to a study of the dialogue, we have to consider the different routes that the conversation took. Whereas Socrates takes the route of an erotic life, “chasing after larks,” the conversation as presented to us took the route of Cephalus’ deadened imagination and gentlemanly unerotic reproduction. He is like the cold, monstrous “dual” of brothers in the Euthydemus. The Parmenides is Plato’s most erotic dialogue because it is the one most haunted 37 �Maxwell Anthony / Thoughts on an Approach to a Study of the Parmenides by eros. Plato’s challenge is for us to fall in love with it. I suspect that he presents the dialogue as he does in order to inspire rather than discourage our love, so that—overwhelmed if not repulsed by the presentation’s precision and abstraction—we recognize Cephalus’s temptation to an image of philosophy and re-approach the dialogue accepting error in ourselves and the world, asking questions. 38 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Four Poems Louis Petrich Gratification I must act grateful, grab that greater self: so if as beggar I’m half-bent to burn the houses down that eat up hoped-for wealth, or reach for throats that down my thirsting turn, or curse the looks that once I thought were mine— I’ll taller stand to overcome my state and staff from underworld the thoughts I pine to spring, and though no bodied soul’s my mate, one fate enwraps us thankful for the sea that laps the shore, where life first dared to walk long stretches breathing air, becoming free. Just think: from water one day came this talk, these puffs that would like bolts illumine you, to gratify by your eyes green, mine blue. 39 �Louis Petrich / Four Poems Ode to the New Person Man’s partner at her making was no twit, and he consisted like of her, full store— no brows down-turned in standing boredom’s fit, no back looks baiting followers galore. Now palms turn prey to images on pods, new Bacchae!—trained for net of lightsome gods. The glut that glistens screens their eyes conscript. Hairs tingle, aired with electricity of nerves connecting all in committee. She speaks to me of this amazing age, affections sweeping, all the world engaged: “I pass my days in lovely tapping fingers— they are to me the only digits!—linger, dear friend, they never do— diminished yours perforce, yet ever true to here while there now then shared one turned two (in novels three) yet so much more of me to thin—that when dim words leave you desponding, consider prefab motives— trickling colored corresponding!— mine’s higher than normal all the time, I angle but to dangle, language mangle, . . . maybe tangle! 40 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 So bow attention, service options grow, and you will love the lists, concocted dough, whose yeast inside us rises anxious news— these buttons tilled make darling fecund stews— click slick machine, come twitter, fill the pews!” I must have blenched like Adam at the fall. “For shame no—link, don’t blink— skim scroll lap looks and buy something delivered— (get the shipping free!)— bloodless hooks, these multi-windowed tubes— you peer in private—handmaids hind the stairs— or boys, no bias—so eeaasy makes it good, but there’s no doing without our secret-kept identities that every few months change— (security)— this flushes craven parlor purity!” She sees me stead her, makes clean breast of it: “O why receive I never revelation that tells me I am loved in all creation so I can stop this wanting more of mention this losing of attention and my mind? When will some god please message me? I pine.” ......... “Please stimulate me more now, leash me kinder the whirligig of time goes faster wider 41 �Louis Petrich / Four Poems deep cave me—four-walled stories to the point— and bind my sedentary balling joints to virtually what—I do not know— no circling stairs we once were meant to go and now that God yields rule o’er His creation all times and places don’t suffice the nations America retools for paradise.” All this she says in person, born again. Yield souls to gadgets spooning orifices of want with rivers emptying as fast in oceans churning senses bloated dumb. The shield Achilles only could uphold, containing all the world as glory’s price, now sized like apple, skittish little hands keep flourished—since we’re equal, says the man. The sporting games have just begun their fires, to celebrate the funerals— every buyer’s. 42 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Samuel Hage, oil on canvas, 9.5”x7”, 2019 43 �Louis Petrich / Four Poems Words and Things How many weary months, by thoughts alone lives man for shining eyes, and forgets home. Winds crack open hues as wet streaks agonal cut cheeks in palette smeared of words and things —up rise remembered words: impediments, halt not, nor turn by them differed, on tempests look unshaken starred, fool bear doom error, prove love you let me recall your list above all missed, sweet seekers after golden clime where marriage of true minds outedges serrate time. Found dangersome, said ascent! 44 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 fallen from the sky red and black to earth, low horizon eyes bent uprooting mirth —stick deep semantic things: necklace lifted on me shining shoulders waving luster lent suitors dogging stakes down picnic tumblers emptied thirst unquenched telltale vibes my sun eclipsing hats off baby moon braves tan call it fate which stay late— burn up wrongs writ in me sign old names duty’s haste— say no more gone to sea. Son’s wild despair hied him afar from faces that he loved. Come home awhile more lean and sad in school of verse he’s shoved. Too much for me how things make words outdo themselves, how words make things undo themselves. Obtuse am I? Pour on, she says— I do, so vet. It gives us thrills— both grateful, sure. Still, five of me to one of her is not so good arithmetic. 45 �Louis Petrich / Four Poems Lear summons experts: speak love’s quantity— All my love —let ring to two undoes the thing. Those loving hers who serve fat words take fangish turns fordoing king. In wind and rain love’s quality comes clear: Nothing —true spoke to one outdoes all things. Who screens his love like stocks to vest centurial nights cracks vault of being. Without equality there’s similarity or probability maybe, but mostly neither place time ‘til feeling ‘til feeling mined neither place nornor time equalequal mined coinciding, we toe-plow common sands, forfor coinciding, we toe-plow common sands, broken lines incom-our fingers our fingers intertwined broken lines andand incomintertwined patibilities, round sifting treasured hands. patibilities, round sifting treasured hands. Must she augment? Or I diminish? Darcy sized his Lizzy up by one tremendous letter reaching perfectly the finish: God bless you! She felt in time the very man was He. 46 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Great authors can make water wine, seem true. The greatest begged us ending, set me free. Our French sage teaches freedom and equality possess together under God, with much enlightened work committee spent by citizens accomplishing desires while motioning towards higher ends. Can lovers that way steer in currents strong as seas? Our lower ends to leisure volunteer— he worried much about their tyrannies. Our words do bodies want, we actors know and how to risk bereft our hands, impeach impossibles to make them real, addicted yes to loosely named applauded love— me! for I give you, you! 47 �Louis Petrich / Four Poems He took her air in greedily, she charged him keep its sounds to catch his falling paces. Excellent the breathing there! No running out—her speech, her buoyancy— at first; thereafter, sought he them in poems, their shadows followed everywhere, not her, to teach him how to curse and bless, same words, all things, promiscuous. Her image—lithe, enskied—but bears this sting. Take vow of silence, stern ascetic trust, so must we keep integrity from rust. Against my mediated banishment to portholes, runways, squeezed-in in-betweens— I wonder—how could such diminishment become us ever decent to assume, we full-paged, bound together, handsome wholes? So why diminish—at all—in the roll? Abatement theirs, live still largesse my soul! Odysseus much practice took from storied cares and beds, ‘till beggar suited, youth forsook, he wandered home to stead— love her, diminish not, of blood make theirs forgot. His goddess exercises mind of noon as anxious teaser plots his dead by hand; 48 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 on him shines glory phasing like the moon’s, its bastard light the fames he once full-manned. His wife for comic plot will overlook some things, and with his image marriage make to rear up life again for telling sake. In tragic plot he overreaches want, their tested oneness, rooted deep, defers as death transfixes memory in words— oh why could he not keep her standing by in rising river, holding fast the line? This present plot . . . I know not what to call, betide some author to untie its knots, free yes and no to straightway touch the goal. But since the waiting is the readiness, is the ripeness too, is the all-in-all this present must the bowstring bend to slay all thronging swilling arrogating longings— so wrath diminish not ‘till fires make cries forgot. I must feel grateful to my heart for not yet killing me, though designating mind as enemy, whose rightful state it occupies as suitor climbing high in peril tree, in wait for leave from her upstairs in years to plow new fate. Now given how I’ve given self away— 49 �Louis Petrich / Four Poems as long my care for her became my learning— what would be left she gone away, no greatness booked would make me stay, to practice going traveler-like, my journey almost done. Fare well, oh former Dearest Mine of Me, your needed here-now atoms, gone a spree. Oh, bother!— still wonderful against all currents other though stars scribe err put barks at variance I’d reign my chariot yours soft hairs fist strong low gentle words my shores. 50 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Confused and Certain You pulled off there a coupling rare to see. Descartes let senses go for certainty in counting thoughts, but you feel surety turned upside-down and need no purity of math to graft with pleasure new mind’s mates. Old Socrates gave up Athenian life for much confusion spreading: and his bait?— questions—tyrannical in appetite for shrugging wisdom, Sisyphus’ stone. Not so your lithesome shrugs that hearten hands to touch the light on hunch-less shoulders toned by hairs spread warm as lips wine-drunk for man. I wonder if your skeptic brush can fix green eye and fleece me black . . . oh, to know your kicks! Louis Petrich is a tutor at St. John’s College in Annapolis, Maryland. 51 �Elusive Gods and Esoteric Philosophers Ryan Shinkel None may see the face of God and live to tell the tale, or so God likes to tell his prophets. The Lord, it turns out, likes to hide from his seekers. The stranger Jacob wrestles asks to be let go as the sun rises, but Jacob refuses until he receives a blessing. Renamed Israel, he proclaims, “I have seen God face to face, and my life is preserved” (Gen. 32:24-32).1 This blessing—which must be spoken—is not recorded, nor is it said if it was before or after daybreak, when light reveals what is hidden. Jacob is left seeing things anew, as he tells Esau, upon receiving his hand: “for therefore I have seen thy face, as though I had seen the face of God, and thou wast pleased with me” (Gen. 33:10). While this Patriarch sits in the front row, the prophet gets to go backstage. Having found grace before Yahweh and being known by name, Moses asks to see “thy glory” (Ex. 33:17-23). As God bestows grace and mercy as he wills, not as men will, he shall instead “make all my goodness pass before thee” as a proclamation. Moses cannot see his face, “for there shall no man see me, and live.” As a substitute, “while my glory passeth by,” God will shield Moses with his hand: “thou shalt see my back parts: but my face shall not be seen.” Yahweh is a hidden God who discloses his glory at his pleasure. Here, God acts esoterically. Moses and Aaron have heard the word of the Lord, but the people see Moses and hear Aaron (Ex. 4:27-34). Even when God appears as a fire to the people—as he did to Moses—it is from far away, not in a nearby bush, but “like devouring fire” on the mountaintop as seen by the children of Israel (Ex. 24:17). Yahweh is an esoteric deity, open to the few and hidden to the many. Tickets are not publicly sold. 1 The Bible: Authorized King James Version with Apocrypha, with an introduction and notes by Robert Carroll and Stephen Prickett (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1997). 52 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Tradition reflects this phenomenon in scripture of noting distinctions between those to whom God is exoteric or esoteric. When St. Augustine, being troubled by a Manichean literalism, heard St. Ambrose preach, he “judged the Catholic faith” could “be maintained without being ashamed of it.” This case especially concerned “various passages in the Old Testament explained most frequently by way of allegory, by which same passage I was killed when I had taken them literally.” The letter kills, but the spirit gives Augustine life: “when many passages in those books were explained spiritually, I now blamed my own despair” at deeming “the law and the prophets” defenseless against their critics.2 The literal reading of scripture is a basis for allegorical readings as well. One levels supports another. The records of divinity are, in a sense, veiled by letters on the page. The letter protects the spiritual. This textual clothing for the gods occasions for pagans as well as Jews and Christians. In his Metaphysics, Aristotle presents his argument from motion for the existence of the Unmoved Mover, but this being is without any providence which is usually ascribed to deities. The eternal mover originates motion as the primary object of desire and thought. As pure actuality, God is a changeless and living being who is perfect, transcendent, and simple. “On such a principle,” he writes, “depend the heavens and the world of nature.” The whole imperium of heavenly spheres move towards this Mover whose contemplation constitutes pure idea: thought thinks thinking, “for this is God.”3 This cosmological argument extends to the stars: “since there cannot be an infinite regress, the end of every movement will be one of the divine bodies which move through the heavens.” As there is one prime mover, there is one heaven where all movements are for the sake of the divine stars: an ancient secret. But what hides, shall be revealed. 2 St. Augustine, The Confessions of St. Augustine, trans. John K. Ryan (Garden City, NY: Image Books, 1960), 5.24, 131. 3 Aristotle, “Metaphysics,” trans. W.D. Ross, in The Basic Works of Aristotle, ed. Richard McKeon (New York: The Modern Library, 2001), 1072a-b. 53 �Ryan Shinkel / Elusive Gods and Esoteric Philosophers Here, Aristotle discloses that, rather than a God whose revelation is in a hidden form, the poets kept secret within their embellished tales a secret knowledge of gods in nature. The forefathers of the remotest ages handed down to posterity a tradition disguised as a myth: that “these bodies are gods and the divine encloses the whole of nature” (1074b). The rest of the tradition came later—in mythical form—to persuade the multitude for the sake of expedient law and utility by giving human or animal form to these gods. The poets, in this account, were de facto philosophers. They disguised their teachings of natural philosophy in the guise of marvels and fables to protect their work and society. First came the discovery that the heavenly spheres are divine, and then came the noble lies to disguise this teaching for the many. Still, for Aristotle, the early wheat can be separated from the added chaff. Aristotle writes: “that they thought the first substance to be gods, one must regard this as an inspired utterance, and reflect that, while probably each art and each science has often been developed as far as possible and has again perished, these opinions, with others, have been preserved until the present like relics of ancient treasure” (1074b). Only this far is the opinion of the ancestors and earliest predecessors clear to the living. Aristotle rarely gives credence to the poets, but there is scientific truth in this kernel of inspired story, that first substances are divine, since the arts and sciences have progressed and perished, but this relic of ancient treasure has persisted. There is a further instance of poetic inspiration for Aristotle. Many other thinkers postulate many governing principles for the cosmos. However, against these confused views, he charges: “they give us many governing principles; but the world refuses to be governed badly. ‘The rule of many is not good; one ruler let there be’” (1076a). This Homeric quotation (Iliad 2.204) is an example of inspired utterance: Homer is a lyre of metaphysics. Within the poetry hides a revelation of divinity, one which even philosophers may appreciate. But the gods and their poets are not the only ones who can act elusively. Their critics, the philosophers, can play that game as well. René Descartes prefaces his Meditations with a contrast of two kinds of readers. Without 54 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 expecting “any popular approval” or “wide audience,” he urges nobody “to read this book” save “those who are able and willing to meditate seriously with me, and to withdraw their minds from the senses and from all preconceived opinions” (9).4 If many are called to read this book, few are still chosen, as “such readers” as these “are few and far between.” The few are an intended audience, while they who make no attempt to grasp the proper order and connection of the arguments—“but merely try to carp at individual sentences, as is the fashion”—will benefit little from the book. This many “might quibble in many places,” but will not be able to produce worthy “objections” (9-10). Despite the fact that “nothing is older than the truth,” nevertheless in “philosophy” it is believed that “everything can be argued either way” (5). Thus “few people pursue the truth, while the great majority build up their reputation for ingenuity for boldly attacking whatever is most sound.” A lover of wisdom is rare, but dialecticians and sophists are commonplace. Descartes waits for perceptive readers. He who has eyes, let him read with care. One example of perceptive writing is, on the very first page, a rewrite of scripture. As Aristotle reinterpreted Homer and company, so Descartes reinterprets the Bible. He says all theologians assert that God’s existence is naturally demonstrable and more knowable than most created things. As a prooftext, he claims: “in Romans, Chapter 1 it is said that they are ‘without excuse’. And in the same place, in the passage ‘that which is known of God is manifest in them,’ we seem to be told that everything that may be known of God can be demonstrated by reasoning which has no other source but our own mind” (2). Thus Descartes later inquires as to how it is that the knowledge of God is more certain than knowledge of the world. Yet the passage has very much the opposite meaning: “Because that which may be known of God is manifest in them,” St. Paul writes, “for God hath shewed it unto them.” The reason is that, he continues, “the invisible things of him 4 Citations of the Meditations refer to the original pagination of the Latin text as given in: René Descartes, “Meditations on First Philosophy,” in The Philosophical Writings of Descartes, Vol. 2, trans. John Cottingham, Robert Stoothoff, and Dugald Murdoch (New York: Cambridge University Press, 1984). 55 �Ryan Shinkel / Elusive Gods and Esoteric Philosophers from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse” (Rom. 1:19-20). In this passage, the visible works of creation show the invisible powers of God. It begins not with idealism, but experience elucidated by metaphysical insight. We know by natural reason upon creation that God is. What the Apostle says, as St. Thomas Aquinas comments on this scriptural passage, “would not be unless the existence of God could be demonstrated through the things that are made; for the first thing we must know of anything is whether it exists.”5 Instead, Descartes revises Romans 1. It is traditionally understood to mean the knowledge of the infinite creator God from his powers manifested in creation. With Descartes, it instead means a logical proof in the mind. But such a scholastic point, as is made here, is one of “the large number of falsehoods that I had accepted as true in my childhood,” showing “the highly doubtful nature of the whole edifice that I had subsequently based on them.” Thus, “it was necessary, once in the course of my life, to demolish everything completely and start again right from the foundations” so “to establish anything at all in the sciences that was stable and likely to last,” (Meditations 17). Descartes’ methodical doubt shall cleanse these impure opinions away, much like clearing away the anthropomorphic embellishments in poetry in order to find truly inspired utterances. One must doubt to believe. As St. Mark records: “And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief” (Mk. 9:24). Perhaps one need not doubt in order to believe. This is shown in another example of elusive philosophy: David Hume. He doubts not for grandeur in belief, but for moderation in skepticism. The arguments of this Pyrrhonian skeptic have great force, even though their conclusions are blunted by the 5 St. Thomas Aquinas, The Summa Theologica, trans. the Fathers of the English Dominican Province, Second and Revised Ed. (1920), http://www.newadvent.org/summa/index.html, 1.2.2. 56 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 necessities of common life. Twice Hume begins a part of his Treatise with an epigram by Tacitus from his Histories (1.1): “Rara temporum felicitas, ubi sentire, quae velis; & quae sentias, dicere licet,” which is translated as, “The rare good fortune of an age in which we may feel what we wish and say what we feel.”6 Further, he begins his third part with an epigram by Lucan from his Civil Wars (9.562-3): “Durae semper virtutis amator, Quaere quid est virtus, et pasce exemplar honesti,” which means, “A lover of austere virtue, you should at least ask now what Virtue is and demand to see Goodness in her visible shape.”7 Only at this time is it possible for a philosopher to feel what one wishes and freely express it. Yet Hume published his Treatise anonymously, as he says in the Advertisement to his Enquiry of “that juvenile work, which the Author never acknowledged.”8 Hume did not find a large audience, but only a few acerbic authors. Yet even in such circumstances, Hume still takes measures to couch his criticisms of religion in terms of piety: the act of faith is itself a miracle – and thus a violation of the laws of nature as attested by the accustomed experience of conjoined events.9 Some would charge Hume and his ilk exhibit “a century-long degradation and devaluation of the concept ‘philosopher’,” lacking “real spiritual power, spiritual vision of real depth—in short, philosophy.”10 Human, all too human, is truly humean, all too humean. So Friedrich Nietzsche charges. Persons with spiritual power and vision are few and far between. “Every exceptional person instinctively seeks out his fortress, his secrecy, where he is delivered from the crowd, the multitude, the majority, where he is allowed to forget the rule of ‘humanity’, being the exception to it,” he writes of the free spirit in Beyond Good and Evil (26). Since only very few can achieve independence, “a prerogative of the strong,” the 6 David Hume, A Treatise of Human Nature, ed. David Fate Norton and Mary J. Norton (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2001), 1, 179. 7 Ibid., 3, 290. 8 David Hume, “Advertisement,” in An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, ed. Peter Millican (New York: Oxford University Press, 2007), 2. 9 Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, 10.41, 95. 10 Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil, trans. & ed. Marion Faber (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1998), section 252. 57 �Ryan Shinkel / Elusive Gods and Esoteric Philosophers man who attempts it by right but not need is “probably not only strong, but bold to the point of recklessness” (29). This man, so far from the quarrels of human conscience, reaches the point where, if he dies, he perishes across a canyon from human pity and feeling, “and he cannot go back again!” This spirit of independence in philosophy is reserved for freer spirits on high. It is meant for the few, not the multitude. “Whenever our loftiest insights inadvertently reach the ears of people” not “constituted or destined to hear them,” these insights should “sound foolish,” if not sometimes “even criminal” (30). For “earlier philosophers”—from Indians and Greeks to Persians and Muslims, “people in short who believed in hierarchy and not in equality and equal rights”—had “distinguished what is exoteric from what is esoteric.” While “the exoteric philosopher stands on the outside, and sees, estimates, measures, and makes judgements from the outside rather than from the inside,” for “he sees things from down below—whereas the esoteric philosopher sees things from above!” Exoteric philosophy is distanced from what it observes, but is therefore beneath it, while esoteric philosophy is above it all. From the viewpoint of these spiritual heights, “even tragedy ceases to have a tragic effect” and this higher philosopher, “taking all the pain of the world together,” might decide upon “redoubling the pain.” From this outlook, things are topsy-turvy. One goes all the way down the rabbit hole. What nourishes and refreshes a higher type of person is poisonous to an inferior type. The virtues of an ordinary person are vices of weakness in an uncommon philosopher. What occasions ruin and degeneration for this overman would be, paradoxically, a state of affairs where he is “revered as a saint in that lower world into which he sank” (30). If the esoteric philosopher were to descend to the masses, he would be worshipped like a god. Shown here is an inverse relation of what is good and bad for higher persons, and good and evil for lower ones. Some books “have an inverse value for body and soul” if “they are used by the low sort of soul” or by “the higher and more powerful.” For the many, “they are dangerous, erosive, disintegrative books,” while for the few, “they are calls of a herald, challenging those who 58 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 are most valiant to attain their valour.” One can tell by the sense of smell: “Books for the masses are always bad-smelling books: the odour of little people clings to them.” This stink congregates “wherever the common people eat and drink, and even in their places of reverence.” As Nietzsche wryly comments, “Do not go into churches if you want to breathe clean air.” Among the children of Israel a higher being is denigrated, and among the multitude a divine fire is made anthropomorphic. Likewise, an esoteric philosopher in church would stink and have little room to breathe. One needs fresh air, on a mountain with burning bushes. This lesson is not necessarily a new one—as nothing is older than the truth. Do not be afraid of teachers, Jesus of Nazareth tells his disciples, “for there is nothing covered, that shall not be revealed; and hid, that shall not be known” (Matt. 10:25). Even so, the order of who knows what is inverse: “I thank thee, O Father, Lord of heaven and earth,” Christ prays, “because thou hast hid these things from the wise and prudent, and hast revealed them unto babes” (Matt. 11:25). Those who learn sacred mysteries are valleys exalted, while those who do not are mountains and hills made low. The few and the many trade places. If everything hidden shall be revealed, but what is made known is hid from the wise and prudent, then all things are made known— but in a veiled fashion. Thus St. Matthew writes: “All these things spake Jesus unto the multitude in parables; and without a parable spake he not unto them: That it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the prophet, saying, I will open my mouth in parables; I will utter things which have been kept secret from the foundation of the world” (Matt. 13:34-35). Here is a higher type taking on a human nature, one who is to be revered by a lower world into which he sank. How could it be otherwise? A higher being entering a lower level of being is not seen in full, but only in part. The pattern is akin to Dante writing his own person into the Divina Commedia as its protagonist narrator. We characters do not directly see the author directly. How may one approach He who was named by the angel to Moses as “I am that I am” (Ex. 3:14)? One cannot see the unveiled face of 59 �Ryan Shinkel / Elusive Gods and Esoteric Philosophers God and live without mediation. There is a tabernacle for that: “Καὶ ὁ Λόγος σὰρξ ἐγένετο καὶ ἐσκήνωσεν ἐν ἡµῖν” (Jn. 1:14). The Koine Greek translates: the Logos became flesh and tabernacled among us. Tabernacle is a verb predicated on the subject Logos. He who hath ears, let him hear. Ryan Shinkel is a historical researcher and writes from Annapolis. His master’s essay is to be on St. Augustine, and he is currently writing a book about how Achilles became Steve Jobs. Jaime Marquez 60 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 The Epidamnus Affair 1 Gregory LaMontagne [To the Athenians] CORCYRA: When neighbors reticent hail unforeseen, And not in haste collecting bounty due, They must needs qualify their audience Upon two points, advantage and reward. If should entreaties fail on both accounts, Or even if but one such argument Should lose support, then guest importunate Finds hosts alike aloof from his collapse. Therefore, we stand before you for we stand Secure in doubly reinforced request. But first, as honesty marks what is fair, As much, and only after, what is foul, We must our motivation model bare, So Athens first may mark how we did err. By Zeus, 'twas not in wickedness we camped Unyielding in our isolation thus; Instead, belike a stalk atop a hill, Allotting not the sunbeams nor the dew, Absorbing all for profit, we resolved To ally not was but to aid ourselves, And notice how our policy proved true When singly did we conquer Corinth's ships. Alas, success as fortune's evidence, Imprudently we kept our favored course, 1 In one of the incidents which ignited the Peloponnesian War, Corcyraean and Corinthian heralds meet to plead their cases in an Athenian assembly. This is a verse adaptation of Thucydides’ telling of the event (Thucydides, History of the Peloponnesian War, 1.32.1-1.40.6). 61 �Gregory LaMontagne / The Epidamnus Affair And thinking skies would e'er auspicious be, Late desert winds reprove our fortune's lack; For now, as Corinth and her cohorts surge, Fraternal drought yields none with which to merge. Abreast of all, advance we our request: Permit us solace in confed'racy. Our tardiness we said does much us taint, But ripe the bounty is for recompense: Because we call as victims full abused, Redeeming us endears you publicly, And wins you all which we have still to prize: Our naval power is best—excepting you— With ample store of men and currency; Indeed, was e'er alliance smoothly drawn, The power of pledging honorable guard, The pledge with power to guard the hon'rable? Now might be urged our gain is but in war; A rightly boon for nigh 'twill be in store. He's more than blind that sees no conflict near, Not even Corinth could perceive the less— Shortsighted though she be in state and arms— Must needs we mind you of her friend your foe? Why else would she send hasty envoys here Where only treaty will entreat her stays? By staying our united forces, she The better force our sep'rate forfeitures. Though known that Corinth is our motherland, Prefer you'd call us orphan than her spawn, For vilely did she perpetrate her claim, Enslaving kin, forgoing trial for war. If tyrant to those closest bound by seed, Beware ye, Athens, only bound in deed. Pursuing treaties, lest you fear a breach 'Tween you and Lacedaemon's thinning ties, 62 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Our past indifference should embolden you; Provisioned neutral states may join whoe'er. And even if Peloponnesus smarts, The wiser you for doubling your defence. Conjoined, your navy first, ours just behind, Horizons four were bridled by but two; Third best at sea, yon Corinth—lately smote— Yet shunning victor's arrogance, take heed That fortified she'll bankrupt every bet, O'ertaking second's reigns, attaining first. Old counsel is the longest-lived advice: With foes of foes is friendship founded twice. Advantages discussed, hear our reward: No currency has yet been smelt than that Which could repay in drowning galley hulls The debt owed justly keeping freemen free. In truth, there is no recompense. Instead like dangling grapes to prunèd arms, All trophies we could mount were daises, Forever fruitless save in constancy. In sum, with much at hand, and more at stake, States worldliest as fit must bear the world. Encompassing all birds and bones and smoke, Your verdict will proclaim our prophecy: Recline, you forward our enslavement foul; Attack, we both promote the sovereign owl. CORINTH: 'Tis not our way to press with charm or stent, But let the blunted ram of reason sway. Corcyra, late concocting tragic scenes, Beguiling passions, hoped to win their case, And thus, though we prepared apology, Our precedent requires plural refute; 63 �Gregory LaMontagne / The Epidamnus Affair And as more argument usurps more time, What shortly planned proves long when unrehearsed. You heard tell crime of misabuse, a lie; You heard confession of a vice, a truth Befouled by counterfeit remorse, and last You heard a bugbear more befitting youths, That war is braced though long have treaties held. Now Corinth rights you what's been wrongly spelled. A colony is like a husband's heir, Bestowed with raiment, duly nourished, Entitled sanctuary, sure beloved, And asking in return just loyalty. When all such sons spurn father commonly, Indict the latter with mismanagement; But tribute honored barring only one, Lament the sire beset by selfish seed. In siege secure did they press then for trial; In fearful straits do they now beg acquittal; What further evidence must needs contemn? Bereft of friends—our other subjects sate— Corcyra flees to strangers ne'er'fore met, For previous pride seclusion did beget. By this they played their part with learned remorse, But tainted tears resoil where pure ones wash. The lonely weed they spok'st, all rain, all sun, It sucked, devoured, bares their nature true: They justified withdrawal as liberty; Yea, rapine free from guilt or oversight. Retreated, they, from every settlement, But not so far removed to lack a port, And thus they sat and drained each tired guest Whom fate would spurn and cast their woeful way, As much a host should run such hostelry To put all bandits out of busyness. 64 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Are these the friends you trust contracted peace? Are these to trust when pleasant trade times cease? And cease they will if Athens votes for shame; Not Corcyra, but Corinth treaty binds, And planting hopes outside of bound'ries is The surest way to sew condignèd blight. They claim that war portends; fulfill their seers This same day by assenting. We'll see to't. For comrades close to foes are far from friends; Choose Corcyra, you herald us opposed, You rift war's net and spill his pinioned wrath. Our allies justly will attend our sides; Can you, oathbreaking, count on sim'lar vows? Distrust begets distrust, revolt, revolt; You'd gain a friend to lose a sundry more. The godless sacrifice no gods restore. So soon you'll vote what late we passed ourselves— Against the wishes of our allies—said We: powers are right to punish colonies, And thus was Samos, unassisted, quelled. Intruding not, intrude not, mark the law: Give like to like; if fairness moves you not, Be stirred what profits all: impartial wit, Neutrality's epitome, imparts That straightest paths lead swiftest to reward; Abet not wayward crooks who drag repute; Conduct yourselves but wisely, and you'll learn How kind shores kind more fast than any ship. Decision's simple when decisive's tough: Let leave us, Athens, and 'twill be enough. Gregory LaMontange (AGI'19) is a transplant from Houston, Texas who thwarts his natural desire to tell you everything about himself by way of keeping all autobiographical writings to a one-sentence minimum. 65 �A Conversation with Sheba Delaney Colloquy: We at Colloquy are really delighted to be having this conversation with you, Ms. Delaney. Thank you for doing this! Before we move into the specifics, it would be wonderful if you could, for the benefit of our readers, tell us something about yourself. Sheba Delaney: Hi! My name is Sheba Ross Delaney. I'm sixty-seven years old. I grew up in Houston, Texas. I've lived in New York City for about fifty years. I went to art school and had a career as an editorial illustrator for magazines and newspapers. I've also been a fine arts painter most of my adult life and still am. And now I'm also a sophomore at St. John's. CQ: Interesting! How did a sixty-seven year old fine arts student, who has had such a wonderful career, find St. John's? SD: I heard about St. John's when I was in art school. I was always a book person and I was intrigued by the idea of it. But I was on a different path at that time and didn't think about it seriously. But it was always in the back of my mind. Now I have other interests that I would like to pursue and I felt that a solid foundation in the evolution in Western culture would be a good thing to have. Where else but St. John’s? CQ: Being somewhat different from the average profile [of a student] applying to St John’s, how was the experience of the admissions process? SD: Well, we do have a fair number of students who are not eighteen-yearolds straight out of high school. In my sophomore class, we have someone in their forties, who's had a fantastic career as a musician, and people who are in their mid-twenties. But I'm definitely farther away from high school than most! — 66 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 So as far as the admissions process went, I was just as nervous as anybody else. I went through the process normally. I came to the school and interviewed, and I submitted my essays and my information. It was a little challenging getting high school transcripts. I had to go find an Ancient Cave of Transcripts from high schools that no longer exist... But I managed to track them down and I was really thrilled to be admitted. CQ: Was it easy for you to get into the groove, especially as the programme here at St. John's is a little different from the rest of the country? SD: Well, I don't have a comparison to make because I never went to any kind of academic college program. I [only] went to art school and left early to start my career. Putting myself into a structured environment where one is juggling several different and difficult tasks simultaneously was definitely challenging for me. I’ve always been a monotasker! CQ: You have been a voracious reader. Did that make the reading, which we are supposed to do before any Tutorial or Seminar, easier? SD: I’ve always read a lot, but reading critically in preparation for discussion is different from reading for pleasure. I wouldn't say it's a strain because I love to read, but reading carefully—and the volume of reading that has to be done—is a challenge. CQ: The format of discussions is such that you read the text, stick to the text, have questions and explore answers from the text itself—without any interpretation of your own. How has that experience been and how easily could you accustom [yourself] to it? SD: I've never read as a group activity before. So it took some time in the beginning. I think [that] for all freshmen it’s a process to learn how to listen and engage in the conversation. I mean, it's one thing to read and have your ideas and just come in with those ideas, but the goal is to be an active 67 �A Conversation with Sheba Delaney participant in the discussion. It took a little practice, but I feel pretty comfortable with it now. CQ: Do you think that the body of experience that you brought to the table gave you some confidence and reassurance, or did you go with an open mind, eager to learn from whatever everybody around the table could offer? SD: I didn't feel like I had any advantage. What we are doing, we were all new to. It was a learning process and I was learning along with everyone else. So I feel very much on the same level as my classmates and am really interested in what people have to say. I’m amazed at the insights people have that I would never have thought of. So, no, I didn't feel any advantage or a disadvantage. I just kind of felt we were all on the same level. CQ: You have shared that there are people across age groups and experiences in the College. What was the response of your classmates to your presence initially? Do you think that they were open to you? SD: Yes, I’ve felt very accepted. My classmates have been really kind and really accepting. Maybe a little startled at first! But after the first few weeks everybody was just trying to get their work done and get on with it. It’s a great community. It’s been fun. CQ: Have you [already] read any of the books included in your freshman year or sophomore year? How was the experience? SD: I’ve read pretty widely, so, yes, I have read quite a few of the books that we cover. But a lot of them I read a long time ago, so it’s great to revisit them again in this context. CQ: For any of the books that you have [already] read, did you ever feel that there was a change of perspective towards the text or a new interpretation of the text on account of the discussions that ensued in the classroom? 68 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 SD: Oh, I think the classroom discussions definitely enrich my understanding of the text. And I learn as much from my classmates as I do from the text. CQ: Do you think that you would like to pursue any other language—let's say Greek as an additional language—beyond the curriculum? SD: You mean after St. John's, or maybe even now? I probably will be too busy keeping current with the program going forward. I don’t know if I could study two languages at once. But what I do feel is that I've had an introduction to Greek that gives me a good foundation to continue with later if I want to. CQ: In addition to reading, reading, reading, and discussing, is there any other activity on campus that you've participated in or been a part of? SD: Last year, I went to the creative writing group. I've gone to a few one-day study groups. There are so many things that look like fun! But to be honest, staying on top of my work is my priority. So I try not to get too involved in too many things. CQ: You mentioned attending creative writing club last year. You are already a columnist, aren’t you? SD: Yes, over the years I have written a number of columns on religion for The Episcopal New Yorker, which is a diocesan newspaper. CQ: We heard that you also wrote for a couple of college magazines. Tell us about that, please. SD: Well, one of the unexpected things that happened last year was that a lot of what we’re doing triggered my sense of humor. So I found myself writing humor pieces on the side. A couple of them went into The Gadfly and I had a comic strip on Greek pronouns in the last issue of Energeia. And a poem coming up in the next one. So that’s been fun. 69 �A Conversation with Sheba Delaney CQ: Would you like to contribute to Colloquy in the subsequent issue? SD: Sure, if I come up with something worthwhile! CQ: Let’s talk about essay writing. How easy or difficult has it been for you to write an essay on, say, mathematics? How did you go about it? SD: Writing comes pretty naturally to me, as long as it's something that I'm interested in. But I’m not very comfortable with math, and writing a math paper was a completely alien concept! So my first math papers were actually creative writing pieces using math concepts as characters. And that was a lot of fun and my math tutor, Ms. Ekholm (thank you, Ms. Ekholm!), was quite patient with me! But after we got well into the year and I settled into Euclid a little bit I was ready to write a proper math paper. And I did. CQ: Would you say that you have understood what a Johnnie essay is and what it takes to write one? SD: No, actually, I didn’t really want to learn to write a Johnnie essay. I think in the beginning I was a little worried because I thought I should write a Johnnie essay, whatever that is. And then I thought: “I better stop thinking that way,” because it was just completely intimidating me. So I decided to just think about what was interesting to me and go from there. The tutors are helpful in organising your thoughts. But, basically, I'm super interested in a lot of what we do here. And it's fun for me to try and turn that into a coherent piece of writing. CQ: Now that you're in your sophomore year, what advice do you have for a freshman coming to St. John's? SD: Pace yourself, show up for class, take it one day at a time, and get as much sleep as you can. And take time to have some fun! 70 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 CQ: Do you think that there is enough exchange or interaction between undergraduate and Graduate Institute students on campus? How was your experience been? SD: Actually I'm a gregarious person, so I tend to talk to a lot of people. So I have met some people in the Graduate Institute, but I think it would be nice for there to be more interface. Maybe some school-sponsored social event. We are one community after all, and it’s nice for people to get to know each other. CQ: I get that you're not from Annapolis, or anywhere close to this region. How was the change for you? SD: Big. After forty-five years of living in New York City coming to Annapolis was really a very big change, but it was a welcome change. I came here with a purpose and I have a reason for being here, and it's a lovely community. Definitely quieter and slower paced than New York City, but I like it. I'm enjoying my time here. CQ: Are you also juggling a career with your studies or have you taken a break from your full-time career? SD: No, I'm focusing on school right now. I am continuing to paint but it's definitely at a slowed-down pace while I'm in school. CQ: Do you think that we might have an exhibition of your paintings anytime soon in our own Mitchell Gallery? SD: Well I was honored to be part of the Community Art Show last year. The Mitchell Gallery does such a great job putting together interesting shows. I’d be happy to be part of anything they thought was appropriate. CQ: After the undergraduate program, do you have any plans for further studies or will you be taking it a little easy? 71 �A Conversation with Sheba Delaney SD: Well, I’m taking it one day at a time but am hoping to go on and do a Master’s in theology. CQ: That is brilliant. And would you be considering St. John's or do you have any other institutions in mind? SD: Not St. John’s, but don’t know where yet. That’s still down the road. CQ: What is it about theology that inspires you to pursue it academically? SD: Everything. CQ: Is it possible that one day you would write a story of your own—perhaps on your observations of life, a particular phase of your life, or even St. John's, for instance? SD: I never know what I’m going to do next. CQ: Is there anything else that you would like to share with people keen on starting afresh in life, probably wanting to pursue something that they thought that they could not do? We are asking because it takes a lot of courage, and your decision to go back to college after so many years would have taken a lot of thought and courage both. Do you have a message for people who want to do something of that sort in life? SD: I think people should do whatever they want to do, whenever they feel like doing it. We should always be creating the future for ourselves that we want. How long that future will be isn’t relevant. Ms. Delaney worked for many years as an editorial illustrator for many publications, including The New York Times, Time Magazine, Esquire, Money Magazine, and The Times of London. She has exhibited her oil paintings in various gallery and museum shows. She has written frequently on religion for The Episcopal New Yorker. 72 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Jaime Marquez 73 �The Truth of Fiction in the Odyssey Jordi Rozenman The Odyssey overflows with life. Vitality sparkles from its pages as does the sun from the sea against which Homer sets his masterpiece. The work is as full to the brim with vim and vigor as is the man himself, loved, hated, unable to be ignored: Odysseus. But what does this mean, after all? What does it mean that a work of fiction—of lies—can be truer to life than some of the most earnest, and driest, attempts of the philosophers in our program? By the same token, what does it mean that a protagonist so full of fictions—of lies—can offer a different self, a different history, to different people, and can create the valuable effect of truth for his listeners through his lies? What does this teach us about the nature of truth itself? What is it that we are actually looking for when we are, we think, trying to get to the bottom of things? Part of the Odyssey’s depth of honesty and aliveness comes from the true-to-life, exquisitely intricate web it weaves around and between its characters, so that no one is ever moving in a vacuum—not of time, place, or people. They push and pull at strands of the web that connects them to each other, to gods and humans, to the past, to their home. They move in concert with or against each other and their own desires, but never in empty space. Even while they find themselves entangled in the web that Homer weaves, however, the characters themselves spin their own strands and add to the web in which they exist. They are held by it and they help build it; they are acted upon and active—and in the Odyssey some of the most memorable moments of agency come in the medium of lying. Where do we find truth, both in the story and in the mode of fiction itself, and how do we know when we’re getting it? The dazzling, dizzying array of stories that Odysseus, many-minded, reveals and fabricates about his past throughout the narrative can leave one gasping for breath, just as one might feel if one were Odysseus himself, tossed violently about on the sea over and over again until he has lost control over which way 74 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 is forward and which way behind. One sees the web at work here; it is a fitting mirroring of form and content every time Odysseus spins a new tale. When Odysseus, after many a literal and figurative maelstrom, finds himself washed up on the island of the Phaeacians, we see him eloquently attempt to regain control of his life by trying to control time: that is, by trying to effectively make the past past. How do we do this? How do we make an event into something we have been through, instead of something that we are going through? We turn it into a story. We tell the story that has already happened, and when we finish the story it is over. Before Odysseus can effect this transformation of his deeply lodged experiences, however, he knows instinctively that it will require a powerful trigger, and so he asks for help. Odysseus may not even realize until this very point—when all ears are politely, continually waiting for him to tell his story—that he has reached a turning point in his odyssey, and that he is, in fact, at a point where he can do some looking back instead of living through. Of course, these phrases (“make the past past” and “looking back”) beg quotation marks in one sense. The past does not leave us. It becomes an influence, sometimes consciously, sometimes unexpectedly (hence Homer’s web, and the narrative’s twists in and out of the present at every turn and through multiple characters). Nonetheless, there is a difference between enduring and reflecting, and this long-awaited, perhaps often-doubted moment affords Odysseus at least a temporary opportunity for rest and reflection. Still hiding, still unaware that he is no longer in the ordeal of a traumatic sea voyage but beyond it, yet “happy listening,” in the friendly society of fellow humans, Odysseus asks Demodocus to sing him his own song (8.368-369 & 8.487-499).1 We can’t be sure what Odysseus’s motivation is here, but the place and the timing suggest that on some level, subconsciously perhaps, he is looking for an emotional release. His request is to be reminded of his self prior to his misfortunes at sea, of the man that his friends and his family knew. He is looking, in this moment, to be known. He has not been known for such a long time. He has not been recognized in all his humanity— that is, his childhood, his adolescence, his marriage, his fatherhood—by any 1 All quotations of the Odyssey from: The Odyssey, trans. Emily Wilson (New York: W. W. Norton & Co., 2018). 75 �Jordi Rozenman / The Truth of Fiction of the mythical creatures he has encountered in his travels; he has not been familiar to them. So he asks for Demodocus to “‘sing the story / about the Wooden Horse, which Epeius / built with Athena’s help. Odysseus / dragged it inside and to the citadel[...]. / If you / can tell that as it happened, I will say / that you are truly blessed with inspiration’” (8.493-499). However, our master of disguises has bitten off more than he can chew in this moment, and the emotional release he experiences is of such force and violence that he is unable to praise the poet for the fact that he “was melting into tears” (8.521). The extraordinary simile that follows—which takes up nine lines of its own, switches to present tense and becomes its own full story—is stunning for its vividness and the depth of feeling it carries, enough to cause confusion as to whether we are still discussing Odysseus. So deeply felt is Odysseus’s grieving in this instant that Homer mistrusts our ability to grasp it without momentarily directing our full attention to a more immediately violent story. Conspicuously, like a woman whose life will forever be altered, “in that same desperate way, Odysseus / was crying” (8.531-532). Why? Why at this moment are his cheeks “wet with weeping, as a woman / weeps”? As she watches her fallen husband gasp and die: “She shrieks[...]. The men are right behind. / They hit her shoulders with their spears and lead her / to slavery” (8.522-529). Clearly it is not simply Odysseus’s crying that is of import here: it is how he is crying, and we must examine this catharsis. It is catharsis in the strictest sense of the word as Odysseus listens to a dramatic story artistically delivered and experiences it vicariously while safe in the palace of Alcinous. The difference is, of course, that Odysseus has also experienced this particular story in actuality, in reality, personally: he is, in this moment, being known. In listening to Demodocus, everyone else in the hall pleasantly takes part in the art of the devastation the “‘gods / devised and measured out[...] / to make a song for those in times to come,’” as both wisely and insensitively explained by Alcinous, distant as he is from any personal connection to the war (8.578-580). What everyone else present is experiencing as art, Odysseus is experiencing as truth. Perhaps we begin now to circle back to our earlier question: what is it we are looking for when we say we are looking 76 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 for truth, and how do we know when we have found it? We are, this episode suggests, looking to be known, or to know intuitively and personally what we have heard (not to learn, but to “recollect,” to put it in the terms of Plato’s Meno).2 Is this what is at the core of truth? Is Homer in accord with Socrates here? He seems to be suggesting an inverse of truth as offered in the Meno. Rather than posit that we know we have encountered truth when we recognize it deep in ourselves, Homer suggests that we know truth when we recognize ourselves in it deeply. To further consider this and to understand the remarkable sharpness and poignancy of Odysseus’s cathartic moment, we must contrast it with that of Penelope in Book Nineteen. The Odyssey, in its gorgeous, complex web, offers us more than one instance, more than one character with which to investigate any number of life’s eternal questions. And in the case of the nature of truth, fiction, and self, we would be remiss if we did not pair Odysseus’s desperate catharsis with the moment that mirrors it in his wife. It is hard to say which of these moments of emotional release is more fascinating, and when examined together they yield an incredible richness of possibility. Penelope, utterly faithful and continuously grieving for two decades, has not been able to manage the suitors without deceit because she cannot bear the thought of marrying a man of a lesser quality than Odysseus. She, like Odysseus in the example above, may not even quite realize by Book Nineteen just how deep a toll the years of selfimposed stasis and living simultaneously on both sides of an unknown have taken on her. She has been enduring her own odyssey, an odyssey of waiting and waiting for something and, in the meantime, never allowing herself to look one way (which would mean Odysseus is dead) or the other (which might mean remarrying, only to discover later that he is alive). She cannot move forward; in effect, she cannot move. And yet the days come and go, and come again: she is “‘weighed down by grief’” (19.96). The discomfort and pain of living this way is immense, yet, mirroring her husband, she cannot afford to reflect on this while she is in it. By the time Odysseus has returned to his home, Penelope has not had the opportunity to truly, consciously consider exactly 2 Plato, Meno, 81c-e. 77 �Jordi Rozenman / The Truth of Fiction how much she needs relief, nor of how small a word or event could break down the wall—offering the pain and relief of catharsis. Such is the context for one of Odysseus’s most important fictions. Disguised as a beggar and spinning sundry tales for all who are near, Odysseus sneaks into his home undetected and spends several days there gathering information before he wrests his household back from the suitors. In large part, he avoids Penelope altogether. On the night before the contest of the bow, however, Penelope requests the beggar’s presence. Eager to speak with him, partly because she has heard him mention Odysseus’s name more than once, she knows there is something he can offer her—though what it is she doesn’t know. What he offers her, what he feels he must, at this point, offer her are lies. In character as Aethon from Crete, he tells her that Odysseus and his crew stayed for twelve days with him because “‘A storm had driven him off course / [...]although he yearned for Troy’” (19.186-188). Eager though they were to reach the war, “‘a mighty north wind trapped them,’” giving this Aethon some time to get to know Odysseus (19.200). It is a lie, among Odysseus’s many other lies, with enough force to lure even the reader into forgetfulness that it is Odysseus who is speaking and that this never happened. In this stillness before monumental action, in this room with a curious Penelope and a disguised Odysseus, and the sweet pause that tension creates, it is easy to lose the thread of what’s really going on while trying to follow the thread of what Odysseus says is going on. In other words, Odysseus and Homer are working in perfect harmony here: Odysseus is in full control of the characters with his fictions, Homer in full control of the readers with his. The peculiar power of this instance may be due to the inclusion of a real event in Odysseus’s history (the Trojan War), or simply to the power required for Odysseus to deceive Penelope. Either way, it colors the narrator’s next comment with layers of meaning. In this instance, as nowhere else, “His lies were like the truth”—what impeccable placement for such a comment in a narrative full of lies (19.205). However, as in the scene with Demodocus, here it is not only the story which elicits catharsis, but Penelope’s reaction, which 78 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 heightens the whole scene and makes the narrator’s apt exposition replete with meaning. “His lies were like the truth” not only for their well-constructed detail and believability, but for the viscerally personal effect they have on Penelope, who, “as she listened, [...]began to weep” (19.205-206). “Her face”—exactly as Odysseus’s 200 pages earlier—“was melting.” Linguistically this is the exact same moment. Because Odysseus has lost more people and bears more of a burden, the simile that follows for Penelope’s catharsis is less violent and more pleasant (it is a reunion, after all, even if she remains unaware of the fact). It is less sustained than the gut-wrenching one before, but equally poignant: “like the snow that Zephyr / scatters across the mountain peaks; then Eurus / thaws it, and as it melts, the rivers swell / and flow again” (19.207-209). We are in the act of watching Penelope’s heart thaw and release, something it could not afford to do during twenty years of limbo if it was to survive at all. Thus, it is not so much that the lies themselves are “like the truth”; rather, the narrator more precisely could have related that the effects of the lies were the same as those the truth would have had on Penelope. Something very important is happening here: Penelope experiences an honest reaction to lies—a true emotional release. There is something true in her response, and, moreover, there is in fact something true in what Odysseus tells her. What can that be? We know that what he says never happened, he makes it up. There are no facts in the story with which he supplies her. We must now return to the question of fiction, of what we look for in truth, and what it is we feel when we think we have found it. The story Odysseus tells Penelope here is indeed a fiction, but there is truth in fiction regardless of whether there are facts. The truth that Penelope responds to in this moment is the truth of being known, the same truth Odysseus responds to in his own moment of release. The truth of this moment is not to be found in the story that is delivered, but in the deliverer himself, and probably in the nature of his delivery as well. Just hearing Odysseus’s name and any information about him may be emotional for Penelope, but she has heard many such references and many such stories since his departure, and 79 �Jordi Rozenman / The Truth of Fiction has mistrusted them. Penelope cries, lets down her guard when she hears this fake story about Odysseus on Crete, because the person telling it to her knows her and knows what she needs to hear, and how she needs to hear it. Truth in the Odyssey is an experience of being known, deeply. It almost does not matter whether Penelope in fact knows the truth of the identity of the beggar before her, because he knows hers, and this she feels genuinely, honestly. This particular set of lies, and only this set explicitly according to the narrator, is “like the truth” not because of what the teller says, but because the teller knows the heart of his listener. Having investigated the catalysts for each character’s catharsis (catalysts that seem opposed in nature, but in fact have their roots in the same source of truth), we must examine what these two moments can tell us together about the truth-as-being-known via their explanatory similes. It is nothing short of fascinating that Penelope’s moment of release is not that of a woman weeping, “as she falls to wrap her arms around / her husband, fallen fighting for his home / and children” (8.522-525). No—this is Odysseus, in Book Eight! Penelope’s catharsis is not a release of grief over death; hers is a release of pain in order to come back to life. In this lovely moment, “her lovely cheeks / dissolved with tears”—all the more stunning because “She wept for her own husband, / who was right next to her” (emphasis added)—we must ask what the author means by mirroring the two moments and by mirroring truth and untruth (19.209-211). What does it mean that Odysseus sobs in a way that would be perfectly appropriate to his better half at home, an actual wife who at all costs has been trying to avoid imagining herself wrapping her arms around her fallen military husband? What does it mean that Odysseus does this instead, for her, and that Penelope honestly, for the first time with relief, weeps for an absent husband only when she is actually in his presence? It is further evidence of the tie that binds both moments and the concepts of truth and fiction in the Odyssey. Odysseus cries in the manner we would have expected Penelope to, and Penelope cries—in truth—both for Odysseus and with Odysseus, both in mind of him and in sight of him. The analogies highlight brilliantly the fact that the pair’s honest emotions are not dependent on what they know (if Odysseus is alive, if Penelope thinks of him, that 80 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Odysseus is right next to Penelope). Rather, they depend on how well they are known by the one who affords them their moment of truth. In fact, the effect Odysseus’s truth-delivering (without being truth-telling) has on Penelope is the same effect it has on everyone with whom he comes into disguised contact, from the suitors to Eumaeus, Odysseus’s loyal slave. Whether it is an audience listening with fear or affection, we can watch the same strange change begin to settle over everyone the beggar Odysseus encounters. It may be Amphinomus, “[pacing] around the house, / troubled at heart, his head bowed low,” after a disguised Odysseus gives him calm and serious cause to consider leaving (18.152-154). It may be, in a ripple effect of truth, Penelope laughing after “Telemachus sneezed loudly and the noise / resounded through the hall” (17.543-545). Eumaeus has explained the beggar’s ostensible friendship with Odysseus to Penelope, prompting her giddily to remark that “‘if Odysseus comes back / [...]he and his son / will soon take vengeance for [the suitors’] violence’” (17.540-542). What can Telemachus, still green in the art of concealment, do after hearing this except sneeze? And what can Penelope, under the influence of a powerful presence, do after the sneeze except laugh? It is a lighthearted gesture so wildly out of character for the Penelope we have known throughout the rest of the narrative that we may well believe it has been out of her character for the last twenty years. Accidental foreshadowing, sneezing, and laughing take place in direct sequence immediately after Odysseus walks back into his home. In this instance and in the several days that follow, not only Odysseus’s words but his very appearance are a lie; the physical lie he gives to all involved obscures the facts. Neither the suitors, Penelope, nor Eumaeus know the true identity of the man in their midst, but, as stated before, Odysseus knows theirs, and this is the experience of truth in the Odyssey. His presence alone, the repeated use of Odysseus’s long-dead name, the reference to home as “‘the palace of Odysseus,’” the beggar’s oddly brazen refusal to leave—all of these things begin to covertly breathe life (and laughter!) back into the thought of Odysseus in his own home, and the truth of his presence there, even as the inhabitants are being lied to overtly (18.27). This is possible only because Odysseus knows 81 �Jordi Rozenman / The Truth of Fiction “in his heart” with whom he is dealing and thus can give them the experience of truth in the way Penelope experiences it as she cries in the beggar’s presence (22.500). The truth of his presence is something the people around him feel, because they are being known, and their actions only become more heightened and dramatic as Homer progressively builds the tension that begins the moment Odysseus steps through his own door. Odysseus, in his web-spinning, shape-shifting glory, is a message from (and perhaps at times a stand-in for) his creator on the nature of truth. If Odysseus’s and Penelope’s catharses serve as specific examples of this message, we confront an overarching comment about it in pairing Book Fourteen with the story of the curious sea god Proteus in Book Four. When Odysseus arrives at Eumaeus’s home, having just recently experienced his own catharsis and told his complicated story to the Phaeacians, he knows he will not be able to repeat the experience in his own home, with those he loves. Entering in disguise, in deceit, he will not be able immediately to share his story, his self, with loved ones such as Eumaeus—at least, not in words or in facts. But we have now seen that for Homer, and for Odysseus, there are other ways to share oneself, other ways to deliver truth, as long as one feels deeply known. For this reason, the tale Odysseus spins for Eumaeus reads like a bizarre, distorted version of his actual odyssey, peppered with the truth of his character and his hard-won wisdom. He cannot speak facts, but he is compelled to unburden himself to this true friend. His men “‘indulged / their own aggressive impulses, and started / willfully doing damage to the fields / of Egypt,’” rather than the cattle of the Sun God or, perhaps, the Cicones (14.260-264). He stayed seven years in Egypt, instead of on Calypso’s island; a year in Phoenicia (instead of Circe’s island); and even, in this story, sends “‘Odysseus[...] off / to Dodona, to ask the holy oak / what Zeus intended,’” for “‘He had been too long / away from fertile Ithaca’” and “‘He wondered / how best to get back home—in some disguise / or openly’” (14.286-333). The Sun God, Calypso, Circe, Hades, and Tiresias (as Dodona) are implicitly present. And the similarities abound in other stunning ways, from Zeus’s plan “‘to destroy the crew’” to a kind king who “‘helped me without expecting recompense / because his son had found me all worn out, / chilled by the morning air’” (14.316-319). These details 82 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 correspond exactly with Alcinous, Nausicaa, and her discovery of an utterly “worn out” Odysseus emerging from under a pile of leaves. Shapeshifting just as the sea god Proteus when Menelaus holds him and waits for him to “‘change shape / to every animal on earth’,” before “‘At last he [assumes] again the form’” in which he must tell the truth, slippery Odysseus speaks to Eumaeus as different versions of himself (4.415-421). Notably, Eumaeus in his steadfastness is the only person who knows, or at least who verbalizes, that Odysseus is “‘telling silly lies’”—that is, not speaking facts (14.363-364). But also because of his steadfastness, this does not prevent Eumaeus from giving his home and full heart to disguised, deserving Odysseus for the next several days. There Eumaeus offers Odysseus the experience of being known, of truth as it exists in the Odyssey, exactly as Odysseus needs it in this moment. For here, Odysseus is not trying to give Eumaeus an experience of truth; he is trying to reap such an experience himself, testing Eumaeus in a way he was not testing Penelope when he offered and allowed her catharsis. Eumaeus succeeds with flying colors, and in the evenings that follow, shares with Odysseus the kind of truth and “‘magical’” knowing of character that he needs: “‘let us, you and I / [...]take some joy in hearing how much pain / we each have suffered. After many years / of agony and absence from one’s home, / a person can begin enjoying grief’” (15.397-402). This is exactly the kind of truth Odysseus needs right now. Eumaeus exists almost outside the web the author and the other characters continually spin for themselves. His integrity is such that he remains essentially untouched by it, and thus can refract back to Odysseus the kind of truth and knowing Odysseus is mining for in the telling of his own honest fictions. Like Proteus, Odysseus requires some pouncing on, some wrestling, some holding down before he can assume the most revealing (can we say most truthful?) version of himself. There are only a few characters capable of doing this and Eumaeus is among them. We must then, finally, ask ourselves which character can pull Odysseus’s truest self into the light, can give him his own fullest experience of truth. We have seen the kind of catharsis Odysseus, in secret, has offered to his loved ones 83 �Jordi Rozenman / The Truth of Fiction upon his return, and the influence of honesty he has exerted over all rooms he has entered since his return to Ithaca, regardless of his words or appearance. Does this mean that all versions of Odysseus, many-minded, are equally true, and that whatever he offers in each given context is appropriate and true to the moment? Is the self of Odysseus relative to his situation, or is there an absolute self and, if so, how will we recognize it? In one of the story’s most beautiful and most truly epic statements concerning being known, we will recognize that self at his core in the same way Odysseus himself recognizes it: it is at home. It is Ithaca alone which can give him his fullest experience of truth, his truest experience of self. If truth in Homer’s epic is an experience of being deeply known, then this is why Odysseus has to get back, this is why he turns down goddess after goddess, a life of perfect ease on lush, magical islands, immortality itself. He knows that he is turning down false lives and journeying back to his self, to his truth, where he left it twenty years ago. We see this most deeply reflected in Penelope in Book Twenty-three, and in the pregnant, textured silence, warm “in firelight,” of Penelope and Odysseus’s first reunion in which both of them know the other (23.88-90). “He sat beside the pillar, / and kept his eyes down, waiting to find out / whether the woman who once shared his bed / would speak to him” (23.90-93). What a wide distance, what a past and possibly future closeness expressed in one sentence. “She crossed the threshold / and sat across from him beside the wall, [...]in silence, stunned,” and neither of them could speak until Telemachus—who knows less truth than they do at this moment—broke this rich silence (23.8893). Words fail both Penelope and Odysseus in this instance, because Odysseus has found his way back to his home, where his truth and his self have been waiting for him. The experience of being known in this moment is of such a depth for both of them that no words are necessary, or perhaps no words are adequate. Slippery, sea god-like Odysseus gives way to his most authentic self, due to his most deeply being known in Ithaca. We see this brilliantly when Penelope elicits from Odysseus the strongest instance of shock and outrage in the Odyssey. She is the only one strong enough to make the great Odysseus forget himself, slip out of character and his tireless manipulation of the scene: 84 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 “‘Woman! Your words have cut my heart! Who moved / my bed?’” he sputters, and goes on to sputter for the next twenty-two lines (23.183-184). Almost frantic, he pleads, “‘But woman, wife, I do not know if someone— / a man—has cut the olive trunk and moved / my bed, or if it’” (our love, he might as well be saying) “‘is still safe’” (23.203-205). An Odysseus who has lost control of the dialogue, the situation, and himself, is an Odysseus we have never seen. He is shocked out of character and into his most honest self by the one who loves him best and most truly. A modern reader in particular might wonder how Penelope and Odysseus genuinely will slip back into a happy marriage, a happy ending, after twenty years of absence and suffering on both their parts. Odysseus has been through war, shipwrecks, captivity, loss after loss of loyal friends; surely he is not returning the same man he was when he left? Let us reframe slightly and say that the Odysseus that left Ithaca will find himself on Ithaca again, and this is thanks to Eumaeus, his nurse Eurycleia, Telemachus, but mostly to Penelope, who knows him best. Even if he is coming back changed, he is coming back to himself. What is it about Odysseus which allows him to accept truth without words, and to offer truth with untruths? What is it about his particular story to Penelope in Book Nineteen which is uniquely qualified as “like the truth,” which can qualify as fiction rather than simply as lies? What is the difference? What is noble in a work of fiction such that it can become a great book in the way that a work of philosophy or science can? The Odyssey makes an important point about the nature of fiction and why it can be (and usually is) more truly alive than its counterparts. Many of Odysseus’s and Penelope’s greatest moments of agency come when they lie. Or, we can say, when they create fiction to serve a purpose for the listener they know, in the same way that we write fiction and poetry. It is an act of love. What we are actually doing is giving sense, and giving order, to a world that on its own does not make sense. So we create myth in order to create truth and, when we read it, we are known. I used to imagine that our experience of encountering, to borrow a phrase from Salinger, “the rising of a truth” in fiction was the experience of the Meno, of recognizing something that was already deep within ourselves and which the book helped to elicit or remind us of. I think now, though, that truth in 85 �Jordi Rozenman / The Truth of Fiction fiction is more likely a case of Homeric truth: not an experience of knowing, but one of being known. We know we’ve stumbled across it when a sentence or a paragraph smiles up at us from the text and we stop, stunned, wondering how the author who has never met us knew this deep part of our nature or experience with enough familiarity to give us words for it. “If the learner is to obtain the truth, the teacher must bring it to him,” rather than bring him to it, affirms Kierkegaard.3 He must even do more: along with the truth, “he must provide him with the condition for understanding it,” as Demodocus does for Odysseus, as Odysseus does for Penelope, as Odysseus does as soon as he walks into his house. The condition is being known. Truth in fiction is an experience of being known, and it is this that gives the Odyssey its sparkling brilliance: this knowing that makes it pulse with life, rich ambiguity, and truth. Jordi Rozenman (AGI’20) is a former English teacher and college counselor who dreamed about coming to St. John’s for seven years, and can’t believe she’s almost finished. She is a dancer, baker, and published poet. But she’s got nothing on Homer. 3 Søren Kierkegaard, Philosophical Fragments, ed. & trans. Howard V. Hong and Edna H. Hong (Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press, 1985), IV 184, p.14. 86 �Colloquy / Fall 2019 Jaime Marquez 87 �Her, because of and despite Matt Ely That hair, like so much prairie grass, familiar with her shoulders. Her laptop on my lap, a secondhand groin encounter. Using my dollars for her train pass, her churro, her obligation. The thrill of hearing my first name, like something she kept in her closet for Easter. Her apologizing, eyes-askance; my not having to. Her tardiness. My timeliness. The unspoken threat of my fixation. Her smile, eroding with the tides, a coral reef face. My threadbare, unhelpful scarf, a Christmas gift from her among others. Her midday Sprite and pretzel breakfast; such coquettish insomnia! The diminishing weekends I have left to give her before I need some permanence in exchange. My insistence she doesn’t need to decide right now. The fact that she describes me as a friend, but mostly that she describes me. That hair, removed from her shoulders, removed from my expectations. My undelivered emails, all impersonation and id. My fear there is only one of every kind of connection, that no might not mean not yet. The unlikely hope that this is rising action, not denouement. Her indifference to my plans. My confidence she would change. 88 �Continue the conversation at colloquysjc.com, the official blog of the Graduate Institute. You can find more work by Jaime Marquez at jaimemarquez.com. The Colloquy Editorial Board is sincerely grateful to Ms. Sheba Delaney, Mr. Michael Dink, Mr. William Pastille, Mr. Louis Petrich, and Mr. Brandon Wasicsko for their assistance in making this issue of Colloquy possible. This issue of Colloquy is made possible by the generous support of: The Graduate Institute at St. John’s College, Annapolis The St. John’s College Office of Advancement If you would like to participate in the mission of Colloquy, consider donating. Visit community.stjohnscollege.edu/giving and designate “Colloquy” as the recipient of your gift. �The Graduate Institute 60 College Avenue Annapolis, MD 21401 � Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Colloquy Description An account of the resource A student-run journal for the Graduate Institute community of St. John's College in Annapolis, Maryland. The issues feature essays, art, poetry, interviews, and more. Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Contributor An entity responsible for making contributions to the resource St. John's College Greenfield Library Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Original Format The type of object, such as painting, sculpture, paper, photo, and additional data pdf Page numeration Number of pages in the original item. 92 pages Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource Colloquy, Fall 2019 Description An account of the resource Volume VI of Colloquy, published in Fall 2019. Creator An entity primarily responsible for making the resource Poyner, Jordan (Editor-in-Chief) Dorchester, Andrew (editor) Green, Charles (editor) Kaul, Dimple (editor) Marquez, Jaime (editor) Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available St. John's College Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Annapolis, MD Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2020-01 Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource St. John's College owns the rights to this publication. 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